saint Sebastian the Rose

by Glover, Michael W.

  “All right.”

  The two were walking back to the small table Father Lemoine had set up with some equipment and items when Jacobs’s curiosity kicked in as he noticed something.

  “Father Lemoine, what are these rows of stones on either side of us for? Do they line a road around the castle?”

  “Oh, no, this is part of what I was telling you the other night.”

  “Sorry?” Jacob couldn’t piece it together yet.

  “You remember us talking about the castle and its history? Well, these are the tops of the walls of the moat that surrounded the castle. Do you remember?” Father Lemoine asked, piecing the story together for him.

  “Yeah, but you never really finished the story.”

  “You want me to finish it now? That might take a minute. I do not know if we have time to finish the tale and shoot some more,” Father Lemoine said, wondering what would get Jacob’s attention.

  “Oh. Well, I guess lets shoot some more.”

  “Don’t worry; if you want to hear the rest of the tale, be in the study again tonight and I will do my best to remember where we left off. As long as you don’t mind the study? Do you like the room?”

  “Actually very much. It is different with the animal mounts. It’s probably one of the coolest rooms I have been in.” Jacob was also curious. “Do you like it?”

  “The study is one of my favorite rooms, next to the armory of course. That room has been a gathering place for good company and storytelling longer than you can imagine,” Father Lemoine recalled.

  ***

  Jessica wandered, leaving her brother to his fun and herself to some curious adventuring of her own. Around the castle most of the snow had melted, revealing the lush grass beneath. She took in the breadth of the monastery, eyeing the structure carefully. She wasn’t really looking for anything but just passively going over the bricks and windows and rooflines.

  She made her way around, noting the different entrances and how they varied, when she came to one leading to an inner courtyard she seemed to remember. She stopped as a thought came to her. Would her luck be true? Was this the place? She played with the flower she had picked on her way and decided to test her luck.

  Jessica walked into the archway of the courtyard where the light seemed softer because the sun was well on its way to fading away. There she stopped as she looked to the spot she had been before. Sitting on a bench like the day before was her curiosity--Sebastian. She breathed deep, as she knew her luck had held. She wondered if it really was the castle she wanted to search, or was it something or someone else.

  As she took another breath, she walked over toward the bench where it appeared Sebastian was reading. She approached him from behind and came to stand at a distance some ten feet away, not wanting to startle him.

  “Few flowers are as beautiful as the ones that bloom when they should not,” Sebastian spoke before he looked up. Sebastian turned his head to look at Jessica and saw her surprised expression. He then turned his attention to the flower she was holding.

  “They are so looking forward to the spring that they bloom at the first sign of it. Then the snow comes again, and they are caught between surviving in the harsh world or being beautiful despite the danger. But you saved it from all of that.”

  “I couldn’t resist. They’re my favorites. I have never seen any bloom so early and there was something about it coming out of the snow like that,” Jessica remarked.

  “They are my favorites also,” Sebastian said as he scooted over to make some room on the bench.

  Jessica smiled and sat on the spot next to him, intrigued with the young man who made her think and smile and blush every time she saw him. She was so used to guys her age being immature and not interested in any of the things that caught her attention. Sebastian was anything but that. She took a deep breath at the thought. He seemed smart and witty in a weird way; dark and brooding in a way that made her swoon a little, if she even knew what that word meant. Not to mention that he was very attractive. Maybe it was also the confidence he outwardly exuded.

  “Do you always come here to read?” Jessica finally had the courage to ask.

  “Most days, if I can, I like to come here, but not always to read,” Sebastian moved his book over to show her.

  The book contained large blank pages for drawing, and on one of them she saw the sketch that Sebastian had been working on. The castle was drawn in incredible detail, showing a corner of the courtyard. The bricks had real texture that she thought she would actually be able to touch. Jessica reached out for the book with her eyes wide and mouth open as she took in the picture. She looked up at Sebastian as she reached for the book.

  “You drew this?”

  “I like to draw when I am not working or studying. This time of day is my favorite; the light is not too harsh, and I can just get a sense of the colors of things.”

  She turned the pages in the book to reveal sketches on every page. Some were finished, and others seemed to be works in progress. This didn’t matter, for each one had life to it as no drawing she had ever seen.

  “They’re amazing! I wish I could draw like this,” Jessica said.

  “There are only a couple of things you will need,” Sebastian said, as he looked Jessica in the eyes.

  “You just have to practice. If you take the time and commit to something, you can master most anything if you want. But you have to want it.”

  “You said there were a couple of things I would need,” Jessica asked, knowing there was something else. Sebastian knew she was sincerely listening.

  “The other thing you need: you must love the object of your attention. You must be able to feel the presence of whatever you wish to sketch,” Sebastian said, turning the book so they could both see the sketch.

  “You see, this is more than just a wall or a corner. Can you see that the blocks of stone each have character to them? Together they form a solid and strong wall. The window there—you can’t peer into it, but there is a sense of mystery as to who might be looking out. Do you see?”

  “Yes,” Jessica smiled. “How do you see so much?”

  “You just have to look with eyes that are not used to seeing what they haven’t been told to see. We could perceive so much if we just look. You see it; I can tell. You found that rose and you knew. Because of you that rose fulfilled its purpose. If you had not come along, maybe nobody would have noticed it, and the weather would have made it wither and die. You see just fine,” Sebastian acknowledged.

  “Then should I pick every rose that I see?” Jessica asked shyly.

  “I think you already know the answer to your question.” Sebastian played along with her game. “If we picked all of the roses then not many others would learn the lesson. That we are to look with more than our eyes, that we are to notice what is not always told to us, that sometimes the answers to our questions are right in front of us … and that is a lesson most never learn.”

  They both just sat there, not really knowing what to say or do. Jessica was smiling, enjoying the unexpected company. This was part of their vacation she could have never envisioned. She soaked it in like a warm summer breeze.

  Sebastian also had an amazed feeling. Here was someone who felt and shared in similar ways, someone who was so different from any of his friends and family, the monks whom he spent all of his time with. This thrilled him in so many ways he could barely understand. With that the darkness came over his senses and he could feel his smile being stolen away and replaced with sadness. Sebastian took his book and closed it and stood up with his back to Jessica.

  “I must be going. I have some work to do tonight before dinner and Father Donovan will expect me,” Sebastian said. Jessica sensed something was wrong and was not sure if she had done something.

  “I don’t see you around much. Do you go anywhere special?”

  “I work and study mostly during the day, so you will not see me out before this time of day,” Sebastian said.

  “I
am very interested in learning to draw like you do.” Jessica tried to draw Sebastian back into their conversation. Sebastian turned around.

  “Like I said, you have the eye. All you need is to find something you have interest in and look at it for a while. Once you really see it, then the rest is easy; once you understand, it becomes a part of you,” Sebastian stated and walked away.

  Jessica jumped up, not really knowing what to say to make him stay.

  “Will you be around?” she blurted.

  Sebastian stopped and turned and stared; she was beautiful, a perfect companion for the rose she held. Her hair was long and wavy but neatly kept pulled back. Her face looked similar to the way his looked, he thought: she was pale from the winter months except for the redness in her cheeks.

  “Mostly later in the day. Be in the study tonight after dinner. I spend time in there with the others,” Sebastian looked at her and felt the pain in his heart, for he was looking at her with more than just his head. He looked at her with the eyes he had told her about, and he did see, and that was the pain he had not felt for some time. He had not felt this lonely for a long time. You never feel as lonely as when you find someone whom you long to be with and know that it cannot be. Sebastian turned and walked away with his mind swirling.

  Jessica was also confused; she could feel his conflict. How sudden their meeting had been and how suddenly she knew there was so much there. Like a storm that blows up without any notice, there is no time to prepare; only the knowledge that you have to face the storm just as you are.

  She stayed there awhile, thinking and sometimes smiling. How beautiful her day had been. She held her rose up and smelled the fragrance that was strong and crisp in the chill air. Isn’t it wonderful how some days have more than one surprise in them?

  chapter THIRTEEN

  JACOB SAT IN THE COMMON ROOM reading over the notes he had taken while in the library. The room was quiet; his father was nowhere in sight and his sister had still not checked in. Jacob looked up at the walls and the portraits hanging there, staring at them staring at him. He shifted in his spot, feeling a little uneasy after realizing the time and how long he had been alone. He looked around the room, further surveying the layout. This had to be one of those times when the guest was being spied on. His mind started to play tricks on him as he thought he heard something.

  “I know you’re watching me,” he said aloud as if someone was listening. “Give me time and I will find you.”

  Just then the door handle turned slowly, and he watched the door crack open. Jacobs’s eyes started to bug out of his head, thinking someone was going to answer him, when his sister peeked around the door.

  “Jess, why do you have to come in like you are a ghost or something?”

  “I heard you talking as I came to the door and I didn’t know who you were talking to. Who are you talking to?” Jessica asked.

  “No one. The silence was just freaking me out a little.”

  “You really need to stop obsessing over that stuff so much. You’re getting a little jumpy,” his sister noted. “Why weren’t you at dinner? Dad was wondering where you were.”

  “I totally forgot about it. After I left Father Lemoine in the armory I came up here and started reading some. Thought I might get a leg up on our next adventure,” Jacob said with a mischievous grin.

  “I don’t know if I am up for any more of your adventures just yet. I think I’m still recovering from the last one. Besides I am going to the study tonight.”

  “Yeah, me too. Father Lemoine is going to tell more about the castle tonight. Are you really into the stories also or are you just tagging along?” Jacob asked, really wondering.

  “I might as well. I have nothing else better to do.”

  “Where did you disappear to after you left us?” Jacob asked.

  “Oh, I just went wandering around the castle.”

  “Did you find anything interesting?”

  “Nothing I hadn’t already found.”

  Jacob eyed his sister. He knew she wasn’t revealing all of what had happened. He knew her too well to not know she was holding back, but he accepted it, knowing he would probably soon find out.

  “I am going to see if I can find Dad, but he probably hasn’t left the library yet,” Jessica said.

  “Okay, I’m gonna be here for a little more. I’ll catch you later if I can find you.”

  Jessica left the room and headed straight for the study. She never intended on trying to find her dad. Maybe that would buy her some time away from her brother. She knew Jacob realized there was more than what she was telling.

  Jessica found the study, and all was quiet except for the crackling fire. She walked in and made a circle of the room, taking more of it in than she had on the previous night. Now she felt like she could get more acquainted with it. She did really like the room. even though it was completely different from what she was used to. She took in all of the mounts. There were a lot more than what she remembered. They were everywhere, on all of the walls, on the tables and even standing on the floor. Artifacts of all kinds were scattered here and there. This room seemed to be a kind of museum of curiosities.

  After meandering a bit, she found a chair, the one with what she thought was the best view of the study. There is always a best spot in every room and with a room such as this you might as well take full advantage of the view. After she sat and stared at the opposite side of the study, with the fireplace and the mounts around, she looked hard like she was trying to see more than what was there … or maybe just to actually see everything.

  “Do you see it?”

  Startled, Jessica was wrenched from the vision. She recognized the voice immediately and turned to see Sebastian sitting in another chair to her side.

  “You are very quiet,” she said.

  “You were just deep in thought and I didn’t want to disturb you. I think you may have found something. Have you found it?” Sebastian leaned forward as he asked. She took a while to think about what he was asking and remembered their previous encounter.

  “Yes, I think I have. I can feel the life of this room.”

  “Maybe this is where you start to sketch?” Sebastian pointed out to her what she was starting to understand.

  “Well, I see that one of our newcomers has discovered one of our favorite hideaways. Maybe with a little help?” Father Donovan stated as he walked into the room, obviously interrupting a conversation but not wanting to be rude. Sebastian leaned back in his chair, and Jessica smiled up at the old monk without saying anything.

  “You would think with the amount of time we spend together sometimes that the last thing we would want to do is to gather together some more. But I guess it is the company of the ones we gather with that tells so much of how we feel,” Father Donovan said this looking from one to the other with his eyebrows lifted just a little. Jessica just kept smiling at him, not really knowing how to respond.

  “Are we to be expecting more of us this evening or is this an impromptu gathering?” Father Donovan redirected, trying to break the silence.

  “I believe my brother said that Father Lemoine will be coming here again to talk more,” Jessica said.

  “Ah yes, more tales to tell I am sure. And where is your brother? Shall we be seeing him or your father?”

  “I know Jacob said he was coming soon, but as far as my father is concerned, who knows?”

  “Are you getting acquainted with our visitors, Sebastian?” Father Donovan asked him.

  “I have just shown them a little of the castle,” Sebastian offered.

  “Yes, he was showing me some of his sketches earlier. They are incredible,” Jessica said.

  “I would say that you have found a talent when it comes to anything about Sebastian. A fine artist he is, and much of that shows through in his work. We are very proud of him.”

  Voices came from behind, and several people came in including Thomas Ridgeway, Jacob, Father Lemoine and several other monks trailing along.
Jacob looked at his sister with a side glance.

  “I found Dad at the library still hunched over some books. Funny you didn’t find him before I did.”

  Jessica looked at her brother with one of those stares meant to say “shut up.” Their dad found a seat, oblivious to it all. Jacob took a seat next to Sebastian so he could keep an eye on his sister. Father Lemoine found a nice comfortable place on one of the sofas after getting a drink on the little bar.

  “Is your research going well, Mr. Ridgeway?” Father Donovan asked as Father Jacques and Father Andrew entered.

  “Extremely well, but I think my children are doing more research than I am,” Thomas Ridgeway said with pride.

  “Do you find much interest in your father’s work?” Father Donovan seemed interested and doubtful at the same time.

  “I think they have found their own area of study,” Father Lemoine chimed in, and the kids just smiled.

  “We wanted to know more about the moat. We found some references to a battle that seems to be connected somehow, I am not sure how, something to do with lances or spears,” Jacob said.

  “Well you are quite the little researchers, indeed, to have found such a gem. I believe this is where Father Lemoine takes over.” Father Donovan was extremely impressed with the twins and knew exactly where this was going as he looked over the room from Father Lemoine to Sebastian and the others.

  Father Lemoine looked from the kids to Father Donovan. He got up from the couch and walked around a little. He looked over to where Sebastian was sitting and held his gaze for a moment, then continued walking around the room. The room was silent, waiting for something from their storyteller. Father Lemoine made his way over to a corner, and there he apparently found what he was looking for. All eyes were on him. They knew he was building to something. He came back to the group and sat back down, taking a drink and settling himself. He looked into everyone’s eyes, making sure he had their attention.

  “The battle was more than just a battle; it was a clash of titanic proportions for anything that had ever been seen around here. This was almost two hundred years ago. As I have said about the monastery, there were many owners of the castle over the years. At that time a wealthy lord resided here and had built up the defenses of the castle and enjoyed a relative peace, for most attacks would be futile on his stronghold.