Damaged

by Jeanne St. James

  Maybe he didn’t want a woman who came with baggage. Maybe after seeing the episode with Craig and, not to mention, the PFA and horrible pictures, he realized she was more trouble than she was worth. Maybe his anger finally caught up to him, and he was pissed off about her keeping Craig a secret from him. He made it clear he wasn’t happy that Martin knew about her past, that she shared personal matters with her assistant but not with Mace, her lover.

  Or maybe their relationship had become too complicated too quickly for him, and he needed to step back.

  Now, at only a half hour until midnight, she stood facing his closed bedroom door. She tried the knob, surprised to find it unlocked. The room was dark as she closed the door behind her. She felt her way over to the bed to turn on the lamp. The light illuminated the messy sheets, and they reminded her of the pleasure she’d found in Mace’s arms. Only now, it was turning into Hell.

  He had chased one hell—Craig—out of her life, only to bring in another.

  For the past two days, she’d found it impossible to concentrate at work. Her stomach had been clenched into a tight ball, and she might as well not have been there at all. Though Martin had shown concern, he backed off quickly when she snapped at him.

  She studied Maxi’s framed picture. She missed her friend but refused to bug her and put a damper on her newly wedded bliss. Even so, she needed someone to talk to. To ask what went wrong. Maybe he’d been in miserable pain. She hoped that was it, even though she didn’t want him suffering.

  Colby ran a hand over the rumpled sheets. Cold. Just the opposite of all those hot nights together.

  She wandered over to his dresser and picked up his cologne. When she sniffed the bottle, the recognizable scent tightened things in her lower body. She gathered his sweats off the floor and folded them, placing them on the end of his bed, wondering if he had done his physical therapy today. Maybe he would come back feeling better and everything would return to normal.

  With a sigh, she drifted around the room, touching the frames hanging on the wall. Among the pictures were his high school and college diplomas. Colby stepped closer to read them; he had his BS in criminal justice.

  A dark line in the wall, a slight opening, drew her attention to a tiny closet with its door ajar. Not the normal closet he hung his clothes in, she had never noticed this one before. The two-foot high door, painted the same color as the walls, had no knob or hinges to give it away.

  She crossed the room but hesitated as guilt washed over her. She shouldn’t be snooping, but she wanted to know more about this man. More about the man she knew so well but, honestly, hardly knew at all. He was so full of secrets, never talking about his work or past relationships. Nothing.

  So, he couldn’t be mad she had kept Craig a dirty little secret. He couldn’t be; that wouldn’t make sense. She needed to stop guessing. She just had to clear up this misunderstanding, if that’s what it was, when he got home.

  The little door creaked when she slowly pulled it open and peered into the dark compartment, attempting to see inside. A few boxes of files and a small file cabinet filled the tight space. Colby tugged on a drawer. All locked. She grabbed the closest banker’s box and dragged it out into the light and knocked the lid off. It was stuffed full of manila folders with a name written in marker on each tab.

  One thick file laid on top, like it had been recently removed and just tossed back in haste. Written in black block print was the name Manni Spinozi.

  Spinozi. Though the name sounded familiar, she couldn’t exactly place it.

  She opened the file and found a picture clipped to one side of the sleeve and a profile on the man bound on the other side. She studied the photo of a dark-complexioned man, very well dressed. An obvious candid shot, he didn’t appear to know this picture was being taken. She remembered hearing his name on the news but couldn’t recall why.

  As she scanned the profile, she heard voices from the hallway. She recognized Mace’s, but the other—a woman’s—she didn’t know at all.

  Her heart racing, she tossed the file back into the box and slapped the lid on it with shaking hands. She shoved the heavy box back into the closet and quickly shut the door. She rose to her feet as the bedroom door banged open.

  Mace stopped in the doorway, his arm draped around a bleach-bottle blonde.

  She stared at them in surprise, and they stared back at her. No one breathed until the blonde giggled.

  “What are you doing in my room?”

  Colby blinked. “I…” And blinked again, at a loss for words. Her brain didn’t comprehend what she saw. “I…”

  His eyes raked her, and she suddenly felt self-conscious in the oversized T-shirt she sometimes slept in. The woman who smiled up at Mace wore a short, black leather skirt and a little shiny, gold halter top. One which did not cover her breasts completely. The outfit looked a little trashy. No, very trashy, but way sexier than Colby’s shapeless tee.

  “Were you waiting for me like some lonely—”

  Her attention went back to Mace. Think, think, think. “No! I…I forgot something of mine. I came in here to get it.”

  “Did you find it?”

  She watched Mace’s dangling hand brush against top of the blonde’s breasts. They were hard to miss, hanging out like that. She nodded, unable to get any sound past the lump in her throat.

  “Good. Now, we want to be alone.” He sneered at her. “Get out.”

  She couldn’t take her eyes off the two of them standing hip to hip in the bedroom doorway. When Mace leaned down gave the blonde a long, wet kiss on her bright red lips, Colby looked away.

  “Can’t you take a hint?”

  She neared the couple blocking the doorway but paused to sniff the air. “Are you drunk?”

  Mace let out an explosive curse, pushing the blonde aside and reaching for Colby. He grabbed her arm to pull her into the hallway. His tight grip hurt her, but she couldn’t escape. He was frightening her. This wasn’t the man she thought he was.

  Hell, it was Craig all over again! She’d vowed she would never be in this position ever again, never allow herself to be beaten down, mentally or physically. And now—

  His low, menacing words scared her even more. “You’re suffocating me, woman! I can’t take it! I want you out of this house. Tomorrow.”

  Colby finally yanked her arm free. “Don’t worry, I’ll be out of here tonight.”

  She rushed down the hallway and into her bedroom where she flung herself on her bed and smothered her wrenching sobs in her pillow. When they subsided, she felt empty and angry. At herself.

  Damn it. She had fallen. Hard, too. But there was no one to blame but herself. She told herself many times not to get involved, especially with a man like Mace. But she’d gone and done it again. And, once again, she ended up the loser.

  She clenched the bedspread with shaky fingers. It was her own stupidity. She was stupid enough to…

  Holy crap, she had fallen in love with this man! The one who was in his bedroom down the hall with another woman this very moment, ripping her heart out. She sniffled and grabbed a tissue to blow her nose. She needed to get a grip. She survived a rotten relationship before, she could do it again. She had to.

  She would just gather her things out of her room—no, this was his room—and move into her own house. It might not be ready, but she had nowhere else to go. Ironically, she had more done than she originally planned to by this time since Mace had helped complete a lot of the work. She would make do.

  Once she packed her clothes into her suitcases, she only had to get her personal items from the bathroom—which, unfortunately, sat across the hall from Mace.

  As she crept down the hall, she heard giggles and groans, passionate cries.

  Colby wanted to cover her ears with her hands, but she didn’t. She needed to know the truth about the sneaky, low-down man. And she couldn’t find a better way than listening to the man she loved have sex with another woman.

  She closed the bathroom
door behind her before she sobbed out loud.

  Mace heard the squeal of the convertible’s tires. She left.

  “Okay, knock it off.”

  The blonde glanced up in surprise from what she was doing…which was trying to get his pants unzipped. “What’s the matter, baby?”

  “Nothing. I paid you to play the part. Not actually do it.” He jerked away from her and pushed to his feet.

  “I don’t mind, honey, if you want to play a little.” She reached for him with her red painted nails. “You’re kind of cute.”

  He stepped back away from the bed and tucked his shirt back in. “I do mind.”

  The last thing he needed was this woman getting her claws in him since she was probably an equivalent of a petri dish. But she was the best he could find in this town; there weren’t too many strip clubs to choose from.

  “Oh, come on. You can’t blame a girl for trying.”

  Mace dug into his back pocket and pulled out his wallet. He threw a fifty on the bed.

  “For fifty bucks, you can get a little more than play acting.” She smiled at him, licked her lips, and gave him an over-exaggerated wink.

  Jesus Christ. She was not for him. At all. “No thanks, I’ll call you a cab.”

  “Party-pooper.”

  He closed his eyes. Colby had called him a party-pooper once. Yeah, maybe he was. But he was in no mood to “party” with this woman. He wanted Colby. He wanted her so badly, his heart ached. She belonged in his arms. And his bed.

  But now she was gone. Though, it was for the best.

  Yeah, her leaving was for the best. He needed to keep telling himself that.

  Fuck.

  13

  Colby strolled around her newly painted porch, enjoying the evening breeze. She surveyed the front yard. Her landscaper had done a great job. The grass was beginning to look like a real yard. The bushes were pruned and the trees cut back to allow more light around the house. Soon, little patches of flowers would pop up, giving the place some color around the trees, up the walk, around the light posts.

  She sighed. It would be beautiful. Too bad she had no one to share it with.

  At work, Martin had noticed her mood and even suggested she go out on a blind date. Although she refused each time, he wouldn’t let up. He knew the perfect guy and what do you know? He was straight, too. Colby had to laugh at his remark, making Martin smile. He’d finally broken her sad streak. Even if just for a moment.

  Eventually, she agreed to the blind date since she saw no point in just sitting around the house moping every night. It had been three weeks since she left Mace’s house.

  Three weeks. Three long, miserable weeks. She missed him.

  Hell, she loved him. The idiot had made her go and fall in love with him. Damn him.

  He was probably fooling around with every bimbo he could find. She had been nothing but a distraction for him. A temporary plaything. Convenient, since she lived in his home. She had cooked, cleaned, and even done his laundry. And not to mention, helped with his physical therapy. What a damned fool she was.

  Once a fool, always a fool. How many times had she heard women who were abused always look for another abuser. Whether they mean to or not.

  Mace might not have been an abuser, but he was definitely a user.

  Now she stood here, waiting for a blind date. What was wrong with her? She should give up the male sex completely.

  A silver four-door sedan pulled up the driveway. A smartly dressed man got out and gave her a slight wave.

  “Robert?” Approaching him, she gave him the once-over. His brow hair wasn’t nearly as dark as Mace’s. He was much shorter and stockier too, but he had a nice smile.

  “Hello, you must be Colby.” He took her hand and brushed his lips across her knuckles. A real gentleman. “You are more beautiful than Martin said.”

  Heat crawled into Colby’s cheeks. “Thank you.”

  “Are you ready?”

  She nodded, giving him a forced smile. When Robert opened the car door for her, she slid in, murmuring, “Ready as I’ll ever be.”

  Mace paced back and forth in front of the restaurant, his fists clenching and unclenching at a furious pace. He paused once more to peer through the window.

  What was she doing? Fuck! Who was that with her?

  What the hell was he doing here, anyhow? Christ, he was being stupid. Not to mention, so freaking careless.

  He stepped away from the window, disappearing into the darkness. He leaned against the brick building, his fists still clenched painfully as he tried to make sense of this. When he pushed her out of his bed, his house…his life, he hadn’t expected her to fall into another man’s arms so soon.

  How could she be on a date with that guy? And it looked like she was enjoying herself. She kept smiling up at him even though the guy looked like such a nerd. Like a fellow scientist…He groaned.

  Mace had to refrain from rushing into the restaurant and yanking her out of there. He wanted to throw her over his shoulder and carry her home. Back to him. Back to his bed.

  He sucked in a deep breath, tilting his head to look up at the night sky, partly concealed by the street light. He shouldn’t be here. He had to stop tailing her. This wasn’t accomplishing anything, except grief on his part. And it was definitely unsafe for her. He knew better.

  He was thinking with his heart and his dick, not his head.

  After pushing away from the wall, he glanced in the window one last time. That’s when he noticed the car. Not only was his own dumb ass reflected in the window, but so was a long black Lincoln with dark tinted windows.

  He tensed. A bullet could strike him any second, and he would be caught with his pants down. Just like he followed Colby, he’d been tailed. Spinozi’s men knew exactly where he was.

  They knew he had followed Colby here.

  They fucking knew.

  Colby would be in danger, and he did it. It was all his fault.

  He had to get out of there and lead them away from Colby. He couldn’t risk warning her on the slight chance they hadn’t realized Mace was following her. Maybe.

  He could only hope.

  Fighting a last look into the restaurant, Mace slipped away into the alley.

  Robert escorted Colby up the porch and to the front door where she turned to face him. “Well, thanks for a nice evening.”

  He cradled one of her hands in his. His felt much softer and smaller than Mace’s. Not one callus, either.

  “It was a wonderful evening. I hope you enjoyed it. I certainly did.”

  He eyed her mouth, and she realized with a start, he might try to kiss her. She tugged her hand away gently and stepped back. “Good night.”

  Robert looked as though he wanted to say something but refrained. Instead, he smiled at her and nodded knowingly. “Yes, good night, Colby. If you don’t mind, I’d like to call you again.”

  She nodded slightly and watched him return to his car. She didn’t unlock the front door until he drove away. She released a loud sigh.

  Robert couldn’t hold a candle to Mace. She really tried to like Robert tonight.

  She laughed at his jokes, smiled at his compliments. Everything. She tried. But there was nothing there. Not even a hint of a spark. Damn Mace for making her want him.

  And only him.

  She opened the door and reached for the light switch.

  “Colby,” came the whisper near her ear. She yanked her hand back and squealed in surprise.

  “Shh. It’s me.”

  “Mace!” Her eyes slowly adjusted to the dark, but she could barely make out his figure in the foyer. “What the hell are you doing here? How did you get in?”

  “I’m not going to play twenty questions right now. I need to talk to you.”

  “If you’re here to beg forgiveness—” Mace’s vehement curse stopped her cold. I guess not. “Why can’t I turn on the light?” she asked, annoyed. She needed light to make sure she hit her target when she kicked him in those c
heating nuts.

  “Because I don’t want anyone to see I’m in the house.”

  “Who’s going to see?” she asked, losing patience with this game he played.

  “Nobody, hopefully. That’s the point.”

  “Will you tell me what is going on?”

  “Is there somewhere we can sit down?”

  So, he noticed the living room was still empty of furniture. She hadn’t gotten that far yet. “The stairs.”

  He grabbed her arm, directing her through the darkness to her stairway. “Sit.”

  She sat. “Mace—”

  “Colby, let me speak first. This is very important. I came here to warn you.”

  “Warn me? About what?”

  “About a case I was working on.”

  “Manni Spinozi.” The sudden silence chilled her. She wished she could see his face.

  He settled on the step beside her. “What do you know about him?” His cold tone cut her to the quick.

  “Not much. I’ve heard he’s a big mob boss. On the FBI’s Ten Most Wanted list. The ATF and the DEA would also love to get a hold of him.”

  “Where did you hear that?”

  “The news. He was mentioned in the news a few times. Is he the one who shot you?”

  “No. His brother.” He cursed again, savagely. “I’m sorry, Colby. I’m so sorry.”

  “For what?” Why couldn’t she turn on the light? Not being able to read his

  face drove her crazy. It scared her. She felt she was missing half of the story.

  “For getting you involved.”

  “With you?” It was about time he apologized.

  “With this. This mess.”

  “How—”

  “Just being with me could put you in danger. If they have any idea how I feel about…” His voice drifted off. He released a long, tumultuous sigh.

  “Feel about what?” she prodded.

  “Hopefully, they don’t know about you. I hope I got you out of my house in time.”

  “Out of the house,” she repeated. Slowly, things became clear. “You drove

  me out with that…that woman? You mean to tell me it was because of that guy?”