The Next Top Model: Soul Society

by Otaku X

  Chapter 11: Lingerie Photo Shoot

  Yumichika awoke extra early the next morning to Yachiru's candy-laden breath leaning close to his face. He opened his eyes slowly, focusing on her cheery face so close to his in the yellow bedroom.

  "Good morning!" she said loudly, breathing jelly beans on him.

  "What're you doing?" He sat up as her sticky fingers patted his chest where she'd managed to settle a necklace of her own making around his neck. He looked closer at the piece of jewelry, created of sticky colorful candy wrappers.

  "Do you like it?" she asked, still in her Hello Kitty pajamas, hopping in place beside his bed.

  He wrinkled his face at the item. "Did you eat all of these?" he mumbled.

  "Yup! Yup!" She jumped and clapped.

  "This morning?"

  She nodded so fast he couldn't see it.

  He looked to where Nemu was sitting on her bed - as always in the morning and all through the night. She was wearing a colorful lei made of sucker wrappers.

  "It is very attractive on you," she said to him before looking to Yachiru, who had retreated to her own rumbled bed. "She is a very inventive girl."

  Yumichika grumbled something only Nemu could hear and had the sense not to comment on. "Thanks," he said begrudgingly to Yachiru.

  "You're welcome!" Yachiru reached under her pillow and pulled out a bag of Gummy Bears. "I'll make you a matching bracelet later."

  "Oh joy." He had to admit, the necklace smelled fruity.

  "Nemu could pierce your ears, and we could make earrings, too," Yachiru offered through a drooling mouthful of gummies.

  Nemu looked to Yumichika.

  He shook his head. "I'll pass."

  "We could make you look like a real girl," Yachiru said, adding half a dozen licorice gummies to her mouth. "I'll bet Nemu could even make you a girl for real."

  Nemu looked to Yumichika with new interest, tilting her head to one side.

  Yumichika shook his head. "I'll pass on that, too."

  "Tara mail!" Orihime's voice rang through the hall.

  In a flurry of candy wrappers they all three burst from the room to collide with the female pajama-clad bodies breaking from the other bedrooms before bounding down the staircase.

  The ten contestants hovered around Orihime as she braced herself against the wall as they closed in.

  "Read it!" Momo said, tugging on Rangiku's arm, trying to see over Soifon's head in front of her.

  "'You've been in this competition long enough to learn that looks can go a long way, but that doesn't mean your mouth can't get you in trouble,'" Orihime read. "'When the pressure's on, do you always know the right things to say? Be ready at nine a.m. sharp for a fieldtrip.'"

  They all looked to the clock on the wall over Orihime's head.

  "An hour and forty-five minutes," Nanao said. She looked around at the rest of them. "Anyone up for French toast?"

  "Ooh, me!" Orihime said, waving the note. "With dill relish!"

  Rukia groaned. "Not on mine. Honey."

  "How about..."

  They all looked to Yachiru who had suddenly stopped speaking and clapped a hand over her mouth, eyes wide.

  "You all right?" Nanao asked, watching a trickle of black ooze from between the girl's fingers.

  Yachiru nodded, and then sprinted up the curving staircase.

  Yumichika watched her go. "Maybe just some dry toast for her."

  The limousine stopped before the Scene Ten Studios where the offices of Potato magazine were, and the contestants were greeted by the very attractive Megumi Tojima, field coordinator for the celebrity section of the magazine.

  "Hello, hello, so glad you're all here," she said after they had assembled in the conference room where a camera was set up with a cameraman and crew. "I am Megumi Tojima, liaison to our celebrity interviewees. Today we are going to see how well you do expressing yourself verbally. Mr. Ray Migel will be watching the videos later to see who handled themselves best in an interview."

  The contestants looked around at each other. Yachiru blew a big blue bubble with her gum.

  "First off, no gum chewing in interviews," Megumi said.

  Yachiru made a sad face and spit the gum in the nearest waste basket.

  "I will interview a few of you first so you can see how the format is done, and then you will pair up and interview each other." Megumi smiled at them. "All right?"

  Everyone nodded and agreed.

  After the lighting and camera crew made their adjustments and the contestants were miked up, the interviews began. Megumi sat across from Nemu in a chair in front of a window showing the beautiful Tokyo skyline.

  "What would winning The Next Top Model mean to you?" she asked Nemu.

  Nemu sat very erect in her chair and said immediately: "It would mean I was never voted out."

  Megumi nodded. "Yes. Okay, technically, yes," she looked to the other contestants standing around outside of camera view. "We'll conduct these interviews under the premise that the interviewee has won The Next Top Model. Let's try that."

  Nemu nodded.

  "So, you have won The Top Next Model. What does that mean to you, Nemu?"

  "I've been selected as the best candidate out of many well-qualified entries to do commercial model work and further my career as a figurehead for national brands," Nemu said precisely.

  Megumi nodded slowly. "Yes. Yes. I suppose that would be exactly what being The Next Top Model would mean." She looked out at the other contestants, and then back to Nemu. "Thank you, Nemu. Now, let's hear from Momo."

  Nemu stood up from the chair and Momo took her place. Megumi smiled warmly at Momo.

  "You've just won The Next Top Model, Momo. What are you looking forward to most in your new career?"

  Momo thought for a moment. "Umm, well, I guess, I think it would be..."

  "Try to be more fluid," Megumi said. "You hem-haw and it loses the audience interest."

  "Oh, sorry." Momo nodded. "It would mean smaller girls like me can be models, too. I think it would show younger girls that many styles of models are needed. Anyone can be beautiful."

  "Oh, very good, Momo," Megumi said. She turned to the other girls. "Now you can interview each other to see how it goes on both sides of the conversation. Remember to look at the hostess, to make good eye contact, do not fiddle with your clothes, and smile when needed. Okay?"

  She gave them a few more pointers, and then stood off to the side to watch as Rangiku interviewed Nanao. Rangiku smiled at the woman across from her.

  "So, Nanao, you're The Next Top Model. What do you think got you so far in the competition?" Rangiku asked, raising an eyebrow.

  Nanao thought for a few seconds. "I'd have to say it was never underestimating the other contestants, Rangiku. They were a wonderful group to compete with."

  Rangiku nodded knowingly. "How gracious of you. What is the first thing you'll do as The Next Top Model?"

  "Well, I'll have to request a leave of absence from my current position," she said with a little sigh, "but after that I'll be very busy working in the - global community." She smiled as she caught herself from completing the sentence as she'd planned.

  "I see," Rangiku said with a nod.

  "Very good," Megumi said from the sideline. "Good. Now, let's see Yoruichi conduct an interview with Yumichika."

  Yoruichi and Yumichika took their chairs, he looking uncomfortably at the woman across from him. Yoruichi smiled, eyes glinting as she considered her first question.

  "Mister Yumichika," she said, drawing out the form of address, crossing her legs and leaning over them to him, "how does it feel to be the first man to win The Next Top Model?"

  Yumichika sat straight in his chair, watching her warily. "I believe beauty transcends gender." He smiled back at her. "Just as some people transcend species."

  Her gold eyes narrowed on him. "Oh? Interesting. How do you think you'll be accepted by the public?"

  His grin dropped. "There have been male models before."


  "No male has ever won The Next Top Model."

  "No where does it say The Next Female Top Model," he reminded.

  "It's implied." Yoruichi's foot wiggled in a circled.

  "Where?"

  "There are no facilities in the house for a man."

  He frowned. "I haven't had any problems."

  "Hmm. You haven't. That would cast suspicion on your masculinity, wouldn't it?"

  "Okay, good interview," Megumi said suddenly, clapping a few times, her face hinting at desperation. "Let's move on. How about now we have Orihime and Yachiru?"

  Yoruichi and Yumichika took there places in the standing audience as Yachiru and Orihime took their chairs. Yumichika watched the new interview begin before leaning closer to Yoruichi. "Do you resent my being here?"

  Her eyes slid to look up at him. "Of course not, Yumichika. It was only a fake interview."

  "Oh."

  "Although they do think you're gay," she added as they watched the new interview.

  He frowned. "Who does?"

  "Everyone."

  He looked around at the contestants. "Everyone?"

  "No, not them," she said, smiling slyly. "Just Tara, and the Rays, and all the viewers."

  He scowled. "But why?"

  She looked him over slowly, smiling. "Well, you are a very pretty man, Yumichika."

  He wanted to smile, but something in her smile wouldn't let him.

  In front of them, Yachiru was standing on the chair, attention on Orihime.

  "You just won The Next Top Model -" Yachiru looked quickly to Megumi. "She really won?"

  "No, just pretend," the woman said.

  "Oh. Okay." Yachiru looked back to Orihime. "You won The Next Top Model, now what color of pony are you going to get?"

  "Pink," Orihime said immediately.

  "Me too!" Yachiru hopped in the chair. "What's your favorite candy?"

  "Strawberry Pocky!"

  "Me too. And Gummy Bears. What's your favorite animal cracker?"

  "Elephant." Orihime smiled.

  Yachiru smiled back. "Iced or without?"

  "Without!"

  Yachiru's smile dropped. "That's wrong. Iced."

  "Okay, you've done well," Megumi said, shaking her head. "The questions were a little off, but you both can think on your feet."

  The interviews continued, with Nanao being declared the winner, and the contestants were treated to a tour of the offices, where they got to see the cover of the next issue of Potato, featuring a moody photo of L'Arc-en-Ciel.

  It wasn't until the ride back to the house that Yumichika cornered Yoruichi again.

  "Do people really think I'm gay?" he asked in a low tone in the limousine.

  She shrugged slowly, smiling back at him. "Not everyone..."

  The contestants only had a brief stint at the house, just barely enough time to grab a quick lunch, before another Tara mail was slipped beneath the door. Orihime got there first, but she was soon mobbed by the rest of the girls.

  "'Now is the time to bring it. You either have it, or you don't. You'll find out what I'm talking about at 2:00 p.m.'" Orihime looked to them all as they stood in the living room. "What does that mean?"

  "Oh, this is going to be a big photo shoot," Rangiku said with a nod, then looked to the clock on the wall. "We only have an hour."

  "I hope I have it," Momo said with a timid smile.

  Yoruichi looked to Yumichika, nodding at him.

  He frowned, looking back to the note Orihime held.

  It was the usual studio lot they had done photo shoots in before that the limousine took them. The contestants all spilled out and eagerly went in the usual door, a few of them guessing at what the photo shoot challenge would be. Inside, the girls all looked around at each other as a Barry White song wove through the studio amid the soft fuchsia lights, a few looking uncomfortable at the heavily burgundy velvet draped room that had been set up in the center of the lot.

  Orihime made a hesitant face and leaned to Rukia. "Maybe we're in the wrong place," she whispered uneasily.

  Rukia nodded. "Maybe."

  Ray Migel parted a section of the heavy draperies and stepped out, smiling at them, dressed in white chinos and satin shirt embroidered with gold thread and studded with rhinestones. "Hallo, ladies!"

  "Hello, Ray!" they called back, relieved to see him.

  He clapped his hands in front of him, eyes sparkling at them in the uneven lighting. "Today you're going to be doing a photo shoot for the fantasy lingerie line from Sniggle Boop."

  A low power squeal went through the contestants, a few of them turning blushing.

  "Now, this is not a tawdry shoot, girls. This is Sniggle Boop's most popular fantasy wear, so make it look good. No hooch," he said, primarily to Yoruichi.

  "Bleh!"

  All eyes went to Yachiru, who spewed purple and pink half-digested Gummy Bears into a puddle at Yumichika's feet.

  Yumichika stepped back nearly in time.

  "Eww!" chorused most of the contestants.

  Yachiru heaved again, this time in a different direction.

  Ray looked like he was going to follow her example, but instead only paled for a moment. "Yachiru, honey, you're obviously not feeling too well. Maybe you should sit this one out, baby doll."

  Yachiru made a third puddle before nodding.

  Yumichika stepped closer and patted her small shoulder. "I'll take you back to the barracks, er, house."

  She shook her head, one small hand half over her mouth. "You stay," came her muffled response. "I'll go."

  "...Okay."

  "We'll see you later, sweetie," Ray said to the girl, waving one of the go-fer girls over from the side of the set who had materialized from behind a curtain. He looked at the rest of the contestants. "Anyone else feel ill?"

  Everyone shook their heads.

  "Just take it easy, Yachiru!" Nanao called as the little girl left with the go-fer.

  "Drink orange juice!" Momo added.

  "No more candy!" Yumichika cautioned.

  Yachiru waved him off and disappeared out the back stage door.

  "Well, that was ... colorful," Ray said, looking to the piles of neon goo on the floor as a porter settled there with bucket, broom, and floor-dry. Ray addressed the contestants again. "As I was saying, this is the fantasy line from Sniggle Boop. It's tasteful, for themed lingerie, and you should have fun with the costumes."

  "Will there be male models?" Yoruichi asked.

  "No, no male models today, honey," Ray said, watching Yumichika sigh in relief. "But at some point in the competition, maybe, maybe. So, our winner from the interviews was Nanao." He found the studious-looking woman in the line. "Nanao, your interview was perfect, composed and comfortable. Nice. For your prize you'll be getting twenty-five extra frames for your shoot."

  Nanao smiled, nodding, a little unsure about the extra frames due to the nature of the shoot.

  "Now, first up," Ray looked around as his assistant hurried up to him with a notepad, "is Soifon. You're going to be the sultry schoolgirl."

  Soifon looked a little confused. Yoruichi nudged her with an elbow. "That'll be fun."

  "Nanao," Ray said, reading from the notepad, "you're the distracting secretary. Nemu, you get to be the naughty nurse. Orihime, you're girl of a thousand charms - a harem girl."

  Orihime was half squealing before she thought about it. "Oh."

  "...Rangiku, you're the flirty French maid," Ray continued. "Rukia, you get to be the no-holds-barred bad girl. Yoruichi, you're the sassy pirate wench. Momo, you're the seductive Little Bo Peep, and Yumichika, you're the frisky fraulein. I'll have you know that your outfit was created by the designer Santino Rice who's making a name with his Bavarian Braids line."

  All eyes went to Yumichika, who only nodded for lack of knowing what else to do.

  "Oh," he said after a moment. "Cool."

  Ray nodded. "Now, everyone off to costumes and hair and make-up, and I'll meet you at the black velve
t bedroom shoot area. First up is Orihime!"

  They all found their costumes in the area set up for wardrobe changes beside the hair and make-up stations. It didn't take long for most of them to find their costumes. Momo gleefully held up the pale pink shepherdess dress with its puffy sleeves and billowing lace petticoats that made the short skirt fluff out. She smiled at the matching bonnet, and then grabbed the white staff tied with a pink bow and found her white sheer stockings and pink pumps.

  Orihime watched her, and then looked back to her own outfit. "Is this harem girl or belly dancer?" she asked Rukia, pulling out the pink and garnet outfit. She frowned at the halter and harem pants and girdle.

  "Are there coins attached?" Rukia asked as she searched the rack for her bad girl outfit.

  Orihime shook the harem girl hanger. No clinking. "No. No coins."

  "Then it's harem girl."

  "Oh, thanks."

  Rukia pushed the outfits on the rack to one side as she looked again through the assortment. "I don't see it."

  From the other side of the rack Rangiku handed her a hanger. "Here it is."

  "What? Where's the rest?" Rukia took the hanger, from which draped a few bands of black patent leather with buckles and a coiled whip.

  "That's it," Rangiku said, holding the French maid outfit up to herself. She frowned at the cup size. "I don't think this is going to fit."

  Rukia turned the hanger of leather straps, looking at it from all angles. "This is nothing! There has to be more."

  Rangiku shook her head. "The tag says 'Bad Girl'."

  Rukia looked to Orihime. "If she's the harem girl, why does her costume have so much more? Mine is nothing but a horse halter!"

  Rangiku held the corset up to herself, making the white ruffles puff up under the short black maid skit. "You'll just have to make it work, Rukia. Hey, look, you've got a whip, too. Most of us don't have accessories like that."

  Rukia sighed and picked at the buckles on her outfit.

  Ten minutes later a bashful Orihime stood in front of a tall four-poster bed draped with white swags and mounds of crushed velvet pillows in gold and silver across the black velvet bedspread. She stood before the cameraman and Ray in full pink harem girl regalia, transparent pink veil hanging before her face, pink beaded sandals on her feet.

  "Very nice," Ray said to her, grinning.

  "I don't think this is the costume for me," she said nervously.

  "You're fine, princess. Now take off the veil, and kind of move seductively around the bed. Remember, tasteful, not trashy."

  Orihime thought for a moment, and then struck a pose and drew her fingers languidly down one arm to her face, picking the veil off and dropping it on the floor. She winked slyly at the photographer as he snapped pictures, then turned and lifted one shoulder, looking over it at them.

  "Uh, not quite, Orihime. You're doing striptease harem girl. We want simple product placement. Just act like a harem girl, honey," he said.

  She shook her head.

  Ray sighed. "I guess you're right. We should have made you the belly dancer." He crossed his arms and tapped his chin with one finger. "Just do belly dancer. Think I Dream of Jeannie meets Jasmine."

  "Oh, okay!" Orihime blushed a little, and then put her hands over her head and flipped her wrists upward until her bangles rattled, shoving one hip out to the side, gyrating around the bedroom setting.

  "Exactly," Ray said.

  After Orihime's shoot it was Nemu's turn. She stepped onto the bedroom set, dressed in her starched white figure-hugging nurse uniform that barely fell below her ... that fell well above her knees. The nurse's cap was placed precisely center on her head, the stethoscope dangling at her neck, white stockings and white stiletto pumps adding additional height to her. She stood with hands clasped before her, looking back at Ray and the photographer.

  Ray nodded, smiling. "Wow, Nemu, Naughty Nurse Nemu it is."

  Nemu only looked back at him.

  "O-kay, let's see you play the part."

  Nemu stood stiffly for a few seconds, and then took the stethoscope and angled it out with a flip of her wrist.

  "Uh, a little more sexy," Ray said, frowning.

  Nemu put one hand on her hip, shifted her weight, and flipped her wrist again.

  "Uh, I'm still not getting any life, Nemu. Try smiling and give us an enticing glance."

  Nemu tried.

  Ray shook his head. "You've got the smile, Nemu, but there's nothing behind it. Your eyes should be saying Let me take your pulse, and but instead we're getting flat-line Nurse Ratchet. Try leaning forward, let everything fall towards the camera, and hold the stethoscope out."

  Nemu did as Ray directed, her skirt hitching up, bosom making a plunge toward the camera, threatening to smother the photographer.

  The photographer shook his head. "Something's not working, Ray."

  "I know, I know, she's usually killer in these short skirts. Maybe it's the white. Black she always does so well in," he said. "Go ahead and stand up straight, Nemu." He looked to the photographer. "We can't have a black dress on a nurse; it's too Angel of Death."

  After the full fifty frames of Nemu's milquetoast shoot, she left the set and Nanao took her turn. She wore a navy blue business suit with an ultra short skit, her ruffled white blouse open to her waist, pencils replacing the chopsticks in her bun.

  "Ah, very nice with the glasses," Ray said as she stood before them with her clipboard, an expectant look on her face.

  "What do you want me to do?" she asked, adjusting her glasses by one side.

  "That. Just what you did there; not school teacher, but tilt your head down and give us a look of superiority."

  Nanao dropped her head and raised an eyebrow at the camera questioningly.

  "Good. Now put a little action in it. This is fantasy, remember."

  Nanao nodded, smiling, and wrapped one arm around the bed post and put one knee on the mattress. She dropped the clipboard on the bed, pulled a pencil from her hair and sent a flirty look to them.

  "Are you getting this?" Ray asked the photographer.

  "You bet."

  Nanao got her full set of shots, plus the extra frames, all of which were fairly good, and vacated the set for the next contestant.

  Which was Yumichika. He'd been watching the shoots. He'd been reconsidering his choice of entering the contest. He was wondering how many Gummy Bears he'd have to eat before he could be sick enough to pass on his turn to be photographed.

  But here he was.

  Adorned in a white satin and lace blouse, filled heavily with ruffles to add volume, his black corseted midriff tied with crisscross laces, his double layer of tulle petticoats making the black skirt flounce out to his sides - there he stood beside the bed with a stein. Even with the corset pulled tight, he had very little waist. A manly silhouette.

  Ray groaned. "Ah, yes, Yumichika, our lusty Bavarian maid."

  "No."

  "Okay, not quite, but let's see you sell it."

  Yumichika stood awkwardly before the bed, frowning back at Ray. He lifted the stein. "Cheers!"

  "We're not shooting a beer commercial, Yumichika. Think about the ensemble."

  "I don't want to."

  "Do you want to do the shoot?"

  Yumichika looked to where the rest of the contestants were watching from behind Ray and the crew. Yoruichi smiled at him. "Yes."

  "Let's have you put one foot on the - are those moon boots?" Ray squinted at the black platform boots with thick padding.

  "None of the attractive shoes would fit."

  A ripple of laughter went through the onlookers.

  "Okay, just hold up the stein and give us some flirty poses," Ray said, shaking his head.

  Yumichika toasted them with the stein, put one hand on his hip and gave them a daring sideways smile, followed by two hours of agonizing poses.

  "He just fouled my taste for beer," the photographer said when Yumichika had finished.

  "Like a reject from Ca
baret," Ray said, looking down at his notepad. "Ah, ooh, pirate wench is next."

  The photo shoot ran late. Even with Yachiru's absence and Yoruichi breezing through her frames, the time it took to try to coax a passable shot out of Yumichika put the shoot right up against the judging panel time slot.

  Tara paced before the judges table nervously, size slender in her sleek turquoise bustier and cropped black leather pants, looking anxiously to the door.

  "Where are they?"

  Miss Ray sat behind the judges table beside Uryuu, every one of the ten shiny rhinestones in his tiara glinting in the overhead lights. "Ray say they be late, Miss Tara."

  "Ughh!" She looked to Virgil and then the guest judge, smiling at the latter.

  The door open and the contestants - still in their photo shoot costumes - filed in. Tara looked to them, smiling as the cameras rolled. She gestured to them.

  "Long shoot, hey girls?"

  "Yes, Tara," came the half-chipper reply from the contestants.

  "Sometimes photo shoots take all day and all night. Gotta be ready for that." Tara stood center in front of the table and looked down the runway carpet at them. "I see a whole lotta sizzlin' ladies!"

  The contestants giggled.

  Tara looked at them all for a moment, and then smiled widely. She did her usual recitation of the prizes that were to be lavished upon the winner of The Next Top Model, and then turned to introduce the judges.

  "First, is runway trainer extraordinaire, Miss Ray Constance."

  Miss Ray nodded and smiled, tapping his tiara.

  "You all remember fashion photographer, Virgil Parker." She gestured to the cameraman, who smiled charmingly at them.

  "We also have Mr. Ishida, favorite designer for the fashion-forward of Tokyo. And, lastly, is this week's guest judge," she said, indicating the judge beside Virgil, "Mr. Renji Abarai."

  Renji didn't react. His eyes were skipping between the pirate wench and Little Bo Peep, until he saw the harem girl.

  "Mr. Abarai?" Tara said.

  Renji glanced to her after a moment. "Yes?"

  "Thank you for being here."

  He looked back to the line of contestants, grinning. "...Okay."

  Tara turned back around. "This week ya'll got a taste of specialty catalog photo shoots. We can see what themes you were representing, so we'll get right to the judging." She rounded the table to take her seat between Miss Ray and Virgil. She looked up at the contestants. "Nanao, you're up first."

  Nanao came down the carpet, power walking her black stilettos as she came.

  Tara smiled back at her. "Sex-ay! Okay, Nanao, let's see you're best shot."

  On the screen flicked a photo of Nanao, half crouched on the bed on her knees, arms over her head as she worked the pencils out of her hair.

  "This is a very good shot," Virgil said. "It's sexy, but strong, and not too domineering."

  Renji looked to him, scowling. "You can't say that about her."

  "I'm talking about her photo. It's a very strong -"

  "Her skirt's riding up. It needs to be longer," Renji said, blushing a little.

  Nanao gave him a disappointing look.

  "You have a lot of excellent shots, Nanao," Tara said with nod. "Extra frames, too. Very good. Next up is Rangiku."

  Nanao turned back down the carpet and passed Rangiku coming up it, the latter's black skirt, small white apron, and ample bosom bouncing as she moved on the black pumps.

  "Good walk," Miss Ray said. "Uh-huh. You've come a long way, baby!"

  Rangiku smiled at him.

  "You were the French maid," Tara said, her left eye twitching slightly. "Let's see your best shot."

  All looked to the screen as Rangiku's photo appeared. She was leaned over at the waist, fish-netted legs to the camera, showing nearly all her petticoats, dusting a bed post, torso turned just enough so that most of her was exposed in profile from the lace trimmed black bodice. On her face was a you caught me look to the camera.

  "Very good lines," Virgil said. "Her legs look exceptionally long, and while we don't see any panty, you know -"

  "Hey! You can't talk about her under - unmentionables," Renji snapped at him.

  Rangiku pointed her feather duster at Renji. "You stay out of this."

  "I'm a judge," he said back to her.

  "I'm talking about the photo, Mr. Abarai," Virgil said with a sigh. He turned back to the screen. "Not too coy, and not too silly."

  Tara turned to Uryuu, who was covering his eyes with one hand, peeking between the fingers. She looked down the table to where Renji was fuming at Virgil, and then turned back to Rangiku. "Thank you, Rangiku. Next up, Rukia!"

  Rukia stepped out of the line dressed in her Bad Girl apparel. It wasn't much; mostly buckles on shiny black leather straps crossing her small form in a skimpy pattern that covered the hot spots, putting the Sailor Stars uniform to shame, her black bikini bottom ending in a thong. She looked from Renji, who was watching her with gaping horror, to Tara, and then clutched her coiled whip and stalked down the carpet in her thigh high black patent leather boots.

  She paused before the table, not looking at Renji.

  "You were our Bad Girl," Tara said teasingly, lifting an eyebrow.

  "She's, she's wrapped in nothing but black tape!" Renji finally sputtered, standing up so fast he knocked his chair over.

  "It's a classic dominatrix-style," Virgil said, "that's been -"

  "She's naked!" Renji yelled, pointing at Rukia.

  "She's fierce," Tara said. She looked to Rukia. "Can you show us a little attitude?"

  Rukia swung the whip over her head in a circle, then toward the table, sending a crack through the room and biting a wedge out of the table in front of Tara.

  "Yow!" Tara yelped, nearly leaping out of her bustier. "Now that's some fierce!"

  Miss Ray sat back from the table. "You don't have to show me, hon. I'm sold!"

  "You can't wear that!" Renji yelled at Rukia, his face darkening.

  She stood to her full artificial height in the boots and glared at him. "I'm hot, Renji! Virgil thinks so! I am hawt!"

  "You're naked!" Renji countered, ignoring Virgil's hand tugging on his black shirt sleeve. "Cover up!"

  "I'm hot! Say it."

  "Rukia -"

  I'm hawt! Say it, Renji!" she demanded, the whip twitching in her hand.

  "I think she's hot," Uryuu said meekly, hoping to calm either of them.

  "You pervert!" came a male voice from the doorway.

  All eyes turned to see Ichigo standing behind the contestants.

  "What's he doing here?" Tara asked no one in particular. "Mr. Kurosaki, this is a closed set!"

  "You can't say she's hot. That's disgusting, Ishida!" Ichigo shouted as two security guards dragged him out of the doorway.

  Rukia turned back to Renji. "Say it!"

  "Get your clothes back on!"

  Rukia recoiled and let the whip crack over Renji's head. A look of shock flashed over his face.

  "Why you ... That's it!"

  He leaped over the table and charged towards her. He pulled off his t-shirt and plunged it over Rukia's small form before she could react, pinning her arms inside, and then scooped her up, slung her over his shoulder, and marched down the carpet.

  "Stop it!" Rukia cried, squirming, her naked buttocks mooning over his shoulder as he headed for the hall with her. "Renji, put me down!"

  "Oh, my..." Miss Ray said, watching Renji's back as they retreated out the door. "Are those tattoos?"

  "Put me down, Renji!" they heard Rukia scream from the hall. "Ichigo, make him put me down! Ichigo! Take me back in there, Renji! Ichigo!"

  Her voice faded, and Tara stood up, looking to the other contestants that were giggling and mumbling amongst themselves.

  After a long moment, during which the cameraman tried desperately to get Tara's attention, she blinked a few quick times, and then composed herself. "Do ya'll think she'll be back?"

  All of the contest
ants shook their heads.

  "Is she dropping out?"

  Everyone nodded.

  Following that, one by one, each of the remaining contestants were critiqued and judged on both their photos and how they did in the interview, and then sent out of the room.

  "Well, this has certainly been a strange judging," Tara said, a little too excitedly, in Uryuu's opinion. "We've not only lost our guest judge, but also a contestant, and we haven't even reached our decision yet!"

  "Do we even need to now?" Virgil asked, slightly skeptical as he crossed his arms, sitting back.

  "Here we have Soifon's picture," Tara said, changing subjects quickly as she pulled the aforementioned Chinese woman's photograph from seemingly nowhere. She handed the photo to Virgil. "It's school girl lingerie, darling," she added in an overdone French accent.

  "She definitely doesn't have the body for lingerie, but it's nice to see she's trying," Virgil replied. He shrugged, looking over the short blue plaid skirt, white blouse open to Soifon's navel - exposing nothing - the untied tie hanging loosely around her neck.

  "She don't look like no seductress to me," Miss Ray said, raising a brow at the photo. "More like that crazy Japanese schoolgirl from Kill Bill, in platform Mary Janes."

  "Gogo," Tara said with a nod. "Definitely fierce, but - "

  "But you need to know where to draw the line," Virgil said quickly.

  "She may not have the figure for it, but I'm lovin' her energy," Miss Ray said.

  "Fierce? Energy?" Virgil said. "I say Rukia's bullwhip act takes the cake on those tonight."

  Miss Ray rubbed the edge of the table where the whip had removed a chunk. "You said it."

  "What about Yoruichi?" Tara asked, slipping Soifon's photograph away and replacing it with Yoruichi's. "Yoruichi wore pirate inspired lingerie."

  "Jack Sparrow would go for it, that's for sure," Miss Ray said with a firm nod. "Or that Ioz guy on the pirate cartoon."

  They all gave him a confused look. He shrugged.

  "Pirates of Dark Water, people. I was a po' black boy," he said defensively. "We didn't have cable."

  "Well, now you're a rich woman, so you can watch whatever you want to," Virgil said with a chuckle.

  "You better believe it, sista," Miss Ray said with a flaccid wave of his hand.

  "And here we have Little Bo Peep." Tara pushed Momo's picture in front of Miss Ray and Uryuu. "What do we think about Momo?"

  "It's good, for what it is," Uryuu said half-heartedly, his mind still elsewhere, on another contestant.

  "I wouldn't mind her watchin' my flock of sheep," Miss Ray added, tapping the picture with his finger. "She may look all sweet and innocent, but she's got something here."

  Tara smiled. "I couldn't agree more."

  "And what about this one?" Virgil asked suddenly, pulling out the photo of Yumichika. "I'm lost for words on this one, I have to say. I don't like it one bit. Looks too..."

  "A tranny mess," Tara finished for him.

  "A hot mess," Miss Ray corrected. "A hot tranny mess. Look at that garter belt." They all looked closer at Yumichika's thigh in the photo. "I say Yumichika's in."

  Virgil shook his head. "He makes the St. Pauli Girl look like Miss Universe."

  Uryuu gagged and quickly looked to the other photos.

  "Have we come to our conclusion?" Tara asked, looking from Virgil to Miss Ray to Uryuu.

  "I say Orihime wins it," Uryuu said, reaching for the nearest box of tissues from mere memories of the harem girl. He stuck one up a nostril, setting his glasses askew on his nose.

  Virgil had tugged the photo of the French maid in the fishnet stockings out from the stack Tara had. "Pass that box over here, will you?"

  Tara sighed as Miss Ray zipped the box of tissues past her on the table.

  "I have to say," Virgil said, tapping the photo of Nemu that peeked out from the stack Tara had, "if I had to pick someone to go home tonight, she'd be in the running. Her expression is so lifeless. Not model-like, not even nurse-like, and certainly not lifelike."

  Miss Ray nodded, rolling his eyes. "She needs to work on her bedside manner."

  Tara took a deep breath. "Do we even want to consider Rukia's photo?"

  Virgil shrugged as the photo was slid out of the stack. "Not much to look at; the strappy-look isn't good on such a thin figure. Maybe it's better Mr. Abarai took her out."

  Tara looked to each of them. "Are we decided?"

  Everyone nodded.

  Tara waited until all the girls had assembled before her before addressing them. "Ten, well, nine without Yachiru - who is still in the running - nine beautiful girls stand before me. Tonight has been a night of unusual turns in the game. Still, the girl whose name I do not call must immediately return to the house, pack their belongings, and go home."

  The contestants held their breaths, fingers crossing. Tara smiled, clearing her throat, and then turned over the first photo in her hands.

  "Orihime."

  Orihime skipped down the runner, pink pantaloons and halter top bouncing as Uryuu reached for the box of tissues for fresh supplies.

  "Congratulations," Tara said to her. "You're still in the running to become The Next Top Model."

  "Oh, thank you!" Orihime turned and went back into line.

  Tara called the next names. Rangiku, Momo, Nanao, Soifon, Yoruichi. Only Yumichika and Nemu were left.

  "Will you both please step forward," Tara said to them.

  They stepped before her.

  "Yumichika, you didn't play to your strengths, and Nemu, we just didn't see the life we needed to from you in this photo shoot.

  "However, this has been a bizarre panel tonight. In the end, a judging was made, and so," she paused dramatically, and then handed them each the final two photos, "you're both still in. Congratulations."

  Yumichika raised his hands in his imitation of a waist-up-only happy dance as Nemu stood motionless.

  Tara threw her hands up and giggled. "Yay! Yes, you're both in!"

  "Thanks, Tara!" Yumichika managed, nudging Nemu with an elbow until she spoke.

  "Thank you."

  Tara waved to them all as they headed out the doorway. "So, everyone go on back to the house, and we'll see you tomorrow. Oh, and let us know if Yachiru isn't out of her sugar coma!"

  And then there were nine.