Wait, was this a special occasion? The logical part of my mind told me no, but the rest told me unequivocally, adamantly, yes.
It took another solid half hour for me to get myself looking appropriately presentable, and when I was finished, I was more nervous than ever.
“Chill out, girl,” Jo said, exiting her room also ready to go. She looked stunning as ever, wearing a sheath-like dress that hugged her many curves just so. It had enough cleavage to be va-va-voom but not enough to get in trouble at a corporate event.
To be honest, sometimes I was a bit jealous of my friend. I had never been much into typically feminine things and hadn’t really gotten into makeup until a year ago. I still knew almost nothing about hair or fashion, and Jo loved each of those things dearly. And although she was what some people would consider chubby, I thought her hourglass figure was to die for. If I were a straight man, I would absolutely be drooling over her wherever she went.
I sighed, and Jo gave me a curious look. “You okay?”
“Yeah,” I said, looking at my oversized Christmas sweater and leggings, wondering if I should change. “Just feeling a bit underdressed.”
“Are you kidding? You look great. That is so you. Especially,” she paused and hurriedly shuffled back in her room before coming back out with a thick, black belt, “if you wear this around that nice little waist of yours.” She tossed it to me, and I caught it, securing it fairly snugly. “Yes! Now that’s what I’m talking about. Yummy!”
I blushed at that and laughed. She always knew what to say to make me feel better. “You ready to go?”
“Yup. Just let me throw on my jacket and make sure I have everything we might need in my purse.”
I grabbed my own coat and wrapped myself up appropriately in some scarfs, mittens, and beanies. Then we both headed out into the cold.
I sounded like a broken record in my own head, telling myself I shouldn’t be going, that I should stay home in my pajamas with some hot cocoa, and yet I didn’t get off the subway. I didn’t turn around and change my mind. I was the master of my own destruction, even though I knew better.
We arrived not too much later and, although it felt odd to be at work after closing hours, we marched right in and headed to back of the store where the party was supposed to be taking place.
“Wow,” Jo remarked. “Jimmy really went all-out on these decorations.”
“I think it was his wife, actually.”
I nearly jumped out of my skin as Nick surprised us. He walked far too quietly for being so tall. Maybe it was because he was on the slender, waifish side.
“Oh, hey there, Nick,” Jo said, playfully punching his arm. “I’m surprised to see you actually on time for something. Did we accidentally cross over into a parallel universe?”
“Yes, actually,” he answered so smoothly that for a moment, I was impressed. “It’s really fascinating. Maybe I can explain it all to you over some drinks.”
Jo laughed, tilting her head back and laughing through ruby lips. “Sure. It is the holidays, after all.”
They walked off arm in arm, and I could have been wrong but, judging by the expression on Nick’s face, he was completely enamored with Jo’s look tonight. Huh, that was interesting. I never noticed that before.
I stood there, giving them enough of a head start so we wouldn’t end up at the proverbial punch bowl at the same time, when I heard footsteps approaching me. Turning, I wasn’t surprised to see Drayer striding toward me, looking charming as always with a crooked smile.
“Hey, you made it!”
“That I did,” I answered, swallowing hard. “My magical reindeer was sure and true.”
“Lucky me then.” His hand ruffled through his hair which somehow seemed thicker than when we had first met a little over a week ago. “Hey, wanna find a nice corner and talk?”
No. No, no, no. That was a terrible idea. I should politely refuse and be on my way. “Sure. I don’t have anything planned.”
And then we were grabbing drinks from the makeshift bar and strolling over to a couple of seats against the wall. People were filing in, no doubt NYC traffic and the weather delaying their arrival.
“You know, every year I say I can’t wait for snow, but then it arrives, and sure, it’s nice for two days, but then it turns brown and gross and the whole world looks disgusting.”
I barked out a laugh at that, surprised at the sudden topic. “I never look forward to snow,” I answered, shaking my head. “It makes the whole world inconvenient.”
“It really does, doesn’t it?”
We shared another chuckle, and I felt myself start to relax and have fun despite myself.
But I couldn’t let myself go too much. I couldn’t allow myself to get too close to him, which I had told myself about ten times in the past hour.
“It makes me want to run away to some place where it’s warm,” I said, pausing to take a sip of my drink.
“Oh, that sounds nice. Somewhere with a lot of beaches and palm trees?”
“Exactly.”
“You know, the thought of you on a beach in one of those cute little bathing suits almost has me wanting to follow you.”
“Nah, I wouldn’t recommend that,” I retorted before I could stop myself. “The best view of me is from the front.”
“I would disagree with that, but you’re the expert.”
“That I am. I’ve been with this body all my life, so I’ve gotten to know all of its twist, turns, and curves.”
“I bet you have. An illustrious degree for certain.”
“One with only one graduate so far.”
“No, that’s truly a shame. I, for one, am a huge proponent of continuing education.”
“I’m sure you are. Too bad the requirements are so exclusionary.”
He leaned forward, his tone dropping and his eyes seeming to look right through me. “I imagine they would have to be for such an illustrious master’s, but I would love to hear how you get into such a program.”
Oh God! It was getting a little steamy in here. I needed to change the topic fast.
“I think it’s nice that workers feel comfortable enough to bring their families here.”
He looked taken aback by my sudden conversation jump but rolled with it. “Yeah. I thought about inviting mine up, but they came up for Thanksgiving, and it’s such a long journey that I feel guilty asking them to spend all the money to come up again. Especially when flights are so unpredictable.”
“Your family is far away?” I asked, truly curious. I didn’t know why it seemed important to know about his life, but it did.
“Oh, yeah. All the way in good ol’ Illinois. They’re well enough off but not so much that they can hop on multiple flights all around the holidays. I thought about going down to them, but I also need to save up money, so, eh, it is what it is.”
His dark eyes flicked to her, and he smiled softly. “What about you?”
Crap. I should never have brought that subject up. What was I thinking?
“They’re … around.”
“Vague. I’m guessing there’s some backstory there?”
I shrugged and looked back into my drink. Thankfully, he sensed I didn’t want to answer further and turned the conversation back to himself and his family.
I listened for a bit, but with every second that passed, I could feel myself being more and more drawn to him. It coiled in my stomach and rushed through my veins. I wanted nothing more than to straddle his lap and have a full-on make-out session, but I couldn’t.
“You know what? I realize I haven’t checked in on Jo in a while. I’m gonna go see what she’s doing.”
“Oh. Okay.”
“I’ll see you around,” I said, quickly getting up.
Clearly, Drayer was confused by the sudden change, but he didn’t object as I walked away. I could only heave a sigh of relief, wondering why I was doing this to myself.
It was like I’d never learned.
I made my way over
to Jo and quickly pulled her aside from Nick. I felt a flash of guilt for a moment. She certainly looked like she was having fun, but I wanted to make sure she knew what was going on.
“Hey, I’m going to head home, okay?”
“What?” she objected with wide eyes. “Why?” The expression on my face must have answered because she didn’t wait for a reply and just gave me a warm hug. “I’ll see you later.”
“Later,” I said quietly. With a short nod to Nick, I turned on my heel and marched right out.
I was an idiot to come here, but at least I was getting out in time.
Chapter 9
Drayer
I sat there for a moment, confused at what had happened. One-minute, Ella and I had been totally gelling and the next, she was rushing out like I had passed the worst gas right next to her. At first, I thought I would just let her go, but then something told me to go after her and ask what I had done that bothered her so much.
I caught up with her right outside the door, the cold wind cutting through my dress shirt like it wasn’t even there.
“Hey!” I called, almost wondering if she would keep walking. But she didn’t. Instead, she turned to me with a pained expression. “Are you okay? Why are you leaving?”
“Just tired,” she answered passively, her eyes flicking away from me.
“Aw, and you were going to book it without saying anything to me?” I tried to sound playful instead of concerned or hurt, but I didn’t think I pulled it off too well. “Did I do something wrong?”
At that, her sour expression broke and turned into one of actual surprise. “Oh, my goodness, no. No! You didn’t do anything.”
I don’t know what possessed me, but I took a step toward her. Perhaps it was cheesy, but she looked like some sort of mystical princess, plum-lipped and pale skinned against the black velvet of the night while the alabaster snow fell all around us. “That’s good. Because I would hate to think I had done something to bother you.”
“You don’t bother me,” she answered quietly, taking a step toward me as well. “You don’t bother me at all. And that’s the issue.”
“Why is it an issue?” Closer. I could feel something building between us, and it just seemed so inevitable, so why fight it at all?
“Because you should bother me,” her voice was barely more than a whisper now, but even that was enough to set my entire body on fire. God, I wanted her so badly. It didn’t seem humanly possible. “I need to stay away from you, but I can’t.”
“You don’t need to do anything,” I answered. “But what I would like to do is kiss you right now.”
For the slightest of seconds, she looked like she was going to turn away and that was going to be that, but suddenly she was on her toes and pressing her lips against mine.
The world ground to a halt, and the cold just didn’t seem that cold anymore. Every bit of my body surged with celebration, and my arms wrapped around her belted waist.
I couldn’t believe it. What I had dreamed of for at least two weeks was happening, and it was every bit as perfect as I had imagined.
When we parted, I was still on cloud nine, and I said what might have been the stupidest thing I’d said in a while. “I’ve been wanting to do that since the day I met you.”
Wow, way to sound stalkery. That was not the best way to put the moves on a lady.
“I’m sorry,” she said, resting her head against my chest. “I’ve just got some issues from my ex, to put it lightly.”
“I understand,” I said, lightly running my hand through her short hair. She had forgotten to put her hat back on in her haste to leave. That was no good, we couldn’t have her catching cold. “But I would never treat you poorly. I would never try to hurt you.”
“Thank you.”
But even as she let me hold her, I could feel she had some reservations. The last thing I wanted to do was pressure her, so I took a step away and looked her in the eyes.
“Hey, if you’re tired, how about I get you a cab?”
“That’d be really expensi—”
“Don’t worry about it,” I said, cutting off that worry before she could get it out. “With all this overtime, I’m making money hand over fist. Let me do this for you, just as a friend. And I don’t expect anything back from this. This is one coworker looking out for another.”
“Well, all right.”
“Good. Maybe we can stand in the foyer while we wait?”
Her face softened, and she gave me the most beautiful smile. “Sure, I’d like that.”
“Great. Let me just call a cab now.”
I pulled my phone out but remembered to open the door for her as we entered. Surprisingly, the phone only rang a couple of times, and then someone picked up immediately. Within a couple of minutes, someone was on their way.
I looked to Ella, who was standing a few feet away from me. I wanted to reach out to her and press her to me once again, but I felt like I should take it slow. The girl had just told me she had a lot of issues from her ex, and that could be any number of things ranging from him being a douche all the way to him physically hitting her.
That thought made my blood boil, and I did my best not to tense. The thought of someone ever laying hands on Ella was rage-inducing, and if that was the case, I would happily hand her ex his own ass several times over.
“You okay over there?”
“Yeah,” I said, reminding myself to cool down. “Just a little cold.”
“You should go get your coat. Don’t worry, I’ll still be here.”
“You sure?” I asked. I was almost afraid that the moment I turned my back, she would disappear like a puff of smoke.
“Yeah, I am.”
I gave her a nod and quickly rushed off to grab some protection against the cold. It gave me enough time to shove away the thought of an abusive ex, and by the time I returned, I was in a much better state.
And miraculously, Ella was still there. I almost heaved a sigh of relief but caught myself in time. I didn’t want her to think I didn’t trust her.
“There,” she said, eyeing me over. “Is that better?”
“Yeah,” I said. We started up a conversation, but I barely got a sentence out before I got a text that the cabbie was here. “Come on, let me walk you out.”
I offered my arm and was pretty stoked when she took it. Carefully, we picked through the snow and ice until we reached the yellow car.
I didn’t even give her a hug as we parted so I could open the door, but I did give her arm a gentle squeeze. Ella smiled as she slid in, but before I could shut the door, she caught my hand.
“Would you like to get in?”
Chapter 10
Ella
I couldn’t believe the words as they came out of my mouth, and yet there they were. My eyes went wide, and my heart leaped into my chest, but I didn’t let go of Drayer’s hand.
After so much denying what I wanted, that kiss had been like injecting pure, uncut drugs right into my bloodstream. I was high on the euphoria, and I wanted more.
So much more.
There was a moment of hesitation, and then Drayer was getting in beside me. He shut the door with a thud, and I curled into his side, trying not to overthink what was about to happen.
We kept our hands off each other during the ride, if only for respect for the cabbie who was on the clock and probably didn’t want to have to sanitize his back seat. Even when we exited, we kept to very polite hand holding as I led him up to my studio apartment. But once we were inside, and I directed him to my couch, everything changed.
I made the first move. I could tell that Drayer was waiting for my signal. It seemed after I told him about my ex, he was much more cautious and didn’t want to push me anywhere I didn’t want to go. That alone was making me almost mad with desire. I couldn’t remember the last time someone I was with had been so attuned to what I was feeling, with what I needed.
I crashed our lips together and threw my arms around his shoulders. I
t felt like heaven to have his mouth against mine, moving against me, exploring, conquering, and my body rushed with excitement.
Why had I been denying myself this so long? The stress of bills and work and school after winter break melted away, leaving me only with the fire burning in my belly.
His arms wound around me, too, practically crushing me to him, and I could feel his taut biceps pressing into my back. He was so strong, so masculine. I loved it. Maybe I was even drunk on it after so long of being man-sober. But I didn’t care. I wanted to drown in everything that was him.
Drayer seemed just as enthralled with me, and it wasn’t long before his arms moved from my waist, so his hands could travel over my body. First, they glided over my clothed thighs and then my sides, until finally one of them cupped a breast.
I gasped and arched into it, breaking away from his kiss to suck in a draft of air. He didn’t seem to mind the pause in lip-contact, however, and his attention turned to peppering kisses along my jaw and neck.
I melted into his actions, feeling my bones turn to jelly. The only things holding me up were my arms around his neck, but that was all I needed.
Except it wasn’t really. The more he kissed me, the more he touched me, the more I needed, well, more. I wanted him to touch every single bit of me until he knew everything about me.
“I want you,” I managed to gasp, tilting my head forward to lock lips once more.
“I can accommodate that,” he answered before returning my kiss with twice as much passion.
If my mouth wasn’t so occupied, I would have giggled salaciously. But as it were, it was quite occupied, and I didn’t plan on being free anytime soon.
Drayer had other plans, though. While we were still pouring our passion into each other, his hands wrapped under my butt, and suddenly we were standing up.
This time, I did laugh giddily and wrapped my legs around his waist. He was so tall! I hadn’t been this high off the floor without a ladder since, well, ever.
“Shall we take this to the bed?” he growled into my mouth, voice so low and sexy that I felt it make me grow that much wetter.
My Sexy Santa Page 4
