by Nella Tyler
Drew chose that moment to speak up. “I came to make sure you understood that, legally and every other way that matters, you have no right to tell Abigail how to run her personal life. Our relationship has nothing to do with Blaine Elementary. It’s between us. Either tell me one way it’s interfered with her responsibilities as a teacher, or leave us alone.”
I sat rigidly in my seat listening to these words, delivered passionately by the man I’d been well on the way to falling in love with. Who was I kidding? I was definitely in love with him. But what did any of that matter? I was at real risk of losing my job right now.
I was sure Drew thought he was being courageous coming to my rescue like a knight in shining armor, but I was no helpless damsel in distress. I could take care of myself. The only thing he was doing was closing the gap between me and the unemployment line.
Terry looked from Drew to me a few times before finally deciding to settle his gaze on me, the expression on his face tight but unreadable. I could see by his posture that he was uncomfortable, but I had no idea if this conversation had upset him.
“Mr. Reid seems very keen on continuing a relationship with you, Abigail,” he said. He removed his glasses to wipe at the skin beneath his eyes, leaving his face exposed in a way I found unnerving. “But I’d like to first know if there is a relationship between the two of you, at all.” He put his glasses back on, returning his face to how it was supposed to look.
“I haven’t had an improper relationship with any of the parents of my students, as we discussed last Friday.” The words were out in the open before I could even consider their effect. I was in self preservation mode right now. Retaining my job was what mattered most.
Terry glanced at Drew, who hadn’t spoken. “Mr. Reid?”
I couldn’t bear to look at him after telling such a despicable lie. My entire being was aching for him — his laughter and his sweet, passionate kisses — and yet here I was denying everything we felt for one another. My cheeks were burning and it was all I could do not to drop my head in shame.
Drew stood suddenly, the chair sliding back into the wall. He looked down at me for a moment, his eyes burning into the side of my face as I refused to meet his gaze, before he stormed out of the office without saying a word to either of us.
“Well, that was unexpected,” Terry remarked, his small face pinched into a troubled frown.
I turned my wrist to check the time on my watch. “Did you need anything else, Terry? My kids are about to head for the playground. I’d like to join them if I could.”
He nodded, looking tired. “Yes, that’s fine. I hope there really is nothing going on between you and Mr. Reid.”
I didn’t dignify that with a response, just hurried from his office and out into the hallway, needing fresh air and to be away from Terry, who had been watching me much too closely. I rushed to the nearest bathroom and closed myself into a stall just as I burst into tears. What the hell had I done?
Chapter 33
Drew
Friday
The Day Before the Valentine’s Day Lunch
I’d kept my head down for most of the day, completing the work that had piled up on my desk after a few days of solid site visits. Brian had done what he could to man the office in my absence, but Karen had called in sick from the hospital — she was home now and resting, but wouldn’t be back in for at least a week — and that left a vacuum that just couldn’t be filled by a single person. I was going to have a fair bit of work to complete at home over the weekend, but we were better off than we’d been a few days ago.
I plowed through reports and managed to draft a number of proposals for Brian to submit after I left for the day. I briefly considered coming back to do a few more hours of work and just setting Sophia up on the floor with her sleeping bag and a few activities like I had dozens of times before, but I had to do something important tonight before it was too late. I needed to bite the bullet and stop putting it off.
“I’m out of here, Brian,” I said, and he looked up from where he was buried in work at his own desk. “Are you coming over this weekend?”
“I can swing by on Sunday, if you and Soph don’t have plans already.” He set his pen down and stretched his back, his spine popping loudly. He groaned in relief. I knew he was going to be here hours after five o’clock had come and gone. He tended to do that on Fridays when he didn’t have a date to hurry off to.
“Sounds good. See you then.” I left the office, locking the front door behind me, as was my custom after leaving him alone in the office. We didn’t have money or anything of value besides electronics, and even those were a few years old. But that was no reason to leave the place unlocked at the end of the afternoon when only Brian was there.
I drove over to the school, arriving a few minutes before the bell rang. My heart had been heavy all week and today was no different. Actually, it was worse. The Valentine’s Day lunch was tomorrow. I had to talk to Sophia tonight about us going without Abigail.
I’d been putting it off both in an attempt to protect her feelings and because I’d thought that Abigail was bound to come to her senses and realize what we had was too important to throw away. Clearly, that wasn’t going to happen — not after what went down in the principal’s office. Abigail was done with me. I needed to come to terms with that and make sure Sophia could come to terms with it, as well.
The bell rang, and I got out of my truck. Sophia and her class came out a few minutes later. She was holding onto Abigail’s hand, as was her custom. I managed to keep from looking at her teacher by keeping my eyes on Soph’s face. The crossing guard gave her the thumbs up, and she came racing towards me. I opened my arms, and she hit the bullseye of the middle of my chest with the force of her entire little body.
I hugged her to me fiercely, my love for her overflowing. I felt tears stinging my eyes for the conversation that was to come. But what other choice did I have besides just coming out with the truth?
“What would you say to some ice cream?” I asked, packing my voice with cheer I didn’t feel.
Sophia brightened immediately, her grin stabbing at my heart as her little body jerked in my arms, the excitement running through every muscle.
“Yay! Can I get two scoops?”
I smiled as I loaded her into the passenger side of the truck. Even as shitty as I felt, her buoyant mood was impossible to deny. She was the only flicker of light in the darkness that the last couple of weeks had been for me.
“You can get as many scoops as you like, honey,” I said. “And sprinkles, too.”
She cheered again, and that shored up my sinking insides a little more, but not nearly enough. I was going to break her heart at the ice cream shop, while she enjoyed her two scoops — one cookies and cream, one strawberry if she stayed true to her usual favorites — drenched in rainbow sprinkles. I hated myself for allowing things to go so sideways with Abigail, but, really, what could I have done? Speaking to the principal had blown up in my face. She’d acted like I was a delusional liar or, worse, some kind of stalker with an unhealthy fixation on her.
We drove to the ice cream shop and went inside. I ordered Sophia’s regular two scoops with extra sprinkles, and then we sat down at one of the tables. The shop wasn’t very busy since it was thirty degrees outside; I watched Sophia devour her ice cream while I tried to come up with a soft way to give her this hard news.
“Are you okay, Daddy?” she asked, completely out of nowhere. Her big brown eyes were focused on my critically. I felt her mother at that moment. She was the only woman who had ever been able to read me like a picture book, and at times like these, I worried she’d passed the uncanny ability onto our daughter. I could almost feel her moving around inside my skull and taking a look at all the worries inside.
“Why would you ask that, Soph?”
She shrugged one shoulder. She’d left her puffy jacket on because eating ice cream made her cold and it wasn’t very warm in here. “You don’t talk about Miss Ea
st anymore or smile at her. Are you mad at her?”
Goddamn, she really was a mini Chelsea. I was in for some real trouble once she became a teenager. I needed to learn how to put on a poker face sooner rather than later.
“I’m not mad at anyone,” I said, which was a lie. I was angry with Abigail, but I was even more hurt. I thought we’d had the beginnings of something special, but, apparently, she hadn’t felt the same way. It was her right to do what she wanted with her own life. I just wish she hadn’t bothered to string me along.
“Honey,” I said, sighing the word. “I have to tell you something.”
“Is it bad?” she asked, keeping her eyes on mine. She was just about finished with her ice cream now and had stickiness coating her lips that she started to lick away.
“It’s not great.” I decided to just come out with it. I should have done this weeks ago, but here we were. “Miss East can’t come with us to the Valentine’s Day lunch.”
Sophia blinked, her heavy lashes moving very slowly, but the expression on her face didn’t collapse into tears. Not yet.
“She forgot that she had something very important to do that same day. She was really sorry when she told me about it, but I told her that we understood.”
I didn’t want to make Abigail look bad, no matter how complicated my feelings for her had become. Sophia had loved her teacher months before I started going out with her. It wouldn’t be fair to poison that love because I felt tossed aside. Sophia had so few positive female role models in her life. I didn’t want to strip this one away from her. Anyway, after the academic year ended, Abigail would be out of our lives for good.
“She can’t come sit at our table?” Sophia’s voice was inquisitive, but not sad. She seemed to be considering my words carefully. I’d never seen her react to bad news like this before. It was an extremely grownup response. I was impressed by it, even as my heart hurt for how quickly she was moving away from the helpless infant I’d once cradled in my arms and promised to protect from all the ugly things in the world.
“No, honey, she can’t. I know you were looking forward to having her there.”
Sophia dropped her eyes to the table, and I could tell she was thinking hard. She stirred the rest of her ice cream, really no more than a few spoonfuls, but didn’t take another bite. She breathed in deeply, her small chest rising in her puffy blue coat, and then looked up at me again.
“Can we still go?”
I blinked at her, in mild shock at her mature response. I’d expected tears, but she seemed to be facing this with calm resolve. I was impressed with her for the second time this afternoon. It was heartening to see Chelsea living through her in this way. I’d never met a stronger, more capable woman, and I hoped to God Sophia would get half of that strength.
“Do you still want to go?” I asked after I’d collected my bearings.
Sophia nodded and even managed to smile a little. “We can have a table for two.”
I reached to take her small, cold hand in mine, enfolding it completely. “I’d love to sit at a table for two with you, sweetheart, any day of the week.”
She grinned wider, and so did I. This girl was amazing, and I was prouder than ever to be her father.
Chapter 34
Abigail
Friday
I showered as soon as I got home from work, just wanting to wash away all the lingering stress of the day. I tried not to think about how Drew hadn’t even looked my way in the car loop. I watched him the entire time, like a lovesick teenager. If Terry had been outside, he would have known that I’d lied in his office when I said Drew and I had never been in a relationship. Hell, he probably already knew I was lying, but he never confronted me over it, seemingly willing to just put all of the unfortunate mess behind us.
I dried my body quickly in the cool air and dressed. I had a few hours’ worth of papers to grade and plans to write up for the next few weeks of classes, and then I was heading out to meet Peyton at a bar downtown. I fell into the work, and my mind stayed tied up in it until it was time to leave. I put on my boots and winter coat — the temperature had dipped again, though it was supposed to warm up a little starting tomorrow, just in time for me to spend Valentine’s Day alone — and ran out to my car.
Peyton was already set up at a table when I arrived, stomping my feet on the mat just inside the entrance to dislodge the dirty snow and ice from my boots. Peyton waved a skinny, sweater-clad arm, and I walked over to where she was sitting. She had a glass of something that looked fruity — it was pink with an orange slice garnishing the rim — sitting in front of her, but I didn’t see anything waiting for me.
“You didn’t order me a drink?” I asked, lifting an eyebrow in mock disappointment. “How rude.”
She laughed. “I didn’t order this one. That guy did.” She used her chin to indicate the general direction to keep from being too obvious. I didn’t look right away, just turned slightly in the chair, pretending to stretch my back as I glanced behind me. There was a man sitting at the bar, alone. He was okay looking, not that it mattered. Peyton was engaged. Even from that distance, the guy should have been able to see the rock on her finger that was busy reflecting all of the light in the room.
“It’s not bad,” she said and pushed it over to me so I could have a taste.
I took a sip. It was fruity, but not cloyingly so. When the waiter arrived at the table, I ordered a glass of chardonnay. Peyton asked for another of the drinks the gentleman across the room had sent over.
“Only, I’ll pay for it myself this time,” she said, a playful light glinting in her blue eyes. She turned her attention back to me as soon as the waiter left to retrieve our drinks. “You look like hell, Abs. What happened since we last spoke about Mr. Dreamboat?”
I heaved a deep sigh at the thought of Drew. I mostly tried to keep busy to avoid thinking about him, especially after the train wreck of an ambush in Terry’s office. I still had no idea what the hell Drew had been thinking. I could have been fired on the spot.
“They’ve actually gotten worse, if you can believe it.”
Her eyes widened as she lifted her light eyebrows. “How could they get worse than you being heartbroken?”
I gave her a weary, weather-beaten smile. My bones ached, I was so rung out from this week. I really just wanted to curl in a ball and go to sleep for a few days. “Drew came in to speak to my principal, completely out of nowhere.”
Peyton had been sipping on her drink and nearly aspirated it. She coughed to clear her throat, her eyes watering by the time she finished. “What?” The word was breathless and insistent.
“I was called into the office, again. I figured Terry had more to say about the Drew situation, though he has never actually used his name.” I paused to let the waiter set down our drinks. Peyton quickly downed the last few swallows of hers and handed him the empty glass. I used the opportunity to take deep drink of my wine. As soon as the waiter was gone, I picked up right where I had left off.
“I had no idea what to expect, only that it was probably bad. I felt like a little kid getting called into the principal’s office!”
She chuckled at that. “I mean, you were getting called into the principal’s office, so…”
I waved my hand at her interruption in my tale. “Anyway, I went into his office and Drew was in there, too!”
Peyton drew a deep breath, completely overdoing it, which was another reason I loved her so much. “What? Why?”
“He was there to tell Terry that our relationship had nothing to do with my job performance and it wasn’t any of Terry’s business what I did away from the school.” My cheeks were hot again just thinking about that terrible conversation. I’d felt like a rat in a trap, knowing something bad was coming, but being unable to escape. I couldn’t leave the office, but I didn’t want to be there, either. I had to work under Terry for as long as I stayed at Blaine. That was something Drew obviously hadn’t understood before taking it upon himself to show up an
d confront my damned boss.
“Whoa.”
“Yeah, whoa is right. And that’s just what Drew said while I was sitting right there. Who knows what the hell he said before I got there.”
“How your boss respond to hearing all of that?” Peyton was leaned forward in her chair, her butt so close to the edge it wouldn’t surprise me at all if she fell onto the floor. Her eyes hadn’t broken away from mine for a moment. Our drinks were sitting abandoned on the table between us.
“He asked me if Drew and I were in a relationship.” Now my cheeks were burning from embarrassment, not passion. I didn’t want to say this next part aloud, because it made me sound like a heartless, uncaring person. But I’d already broken things off with Drew and explained why. Coming to my place of business to confront my boss was completely out of line. “I told him that we weren’t.”
She didn’t move or blink, but I could see I’d stunned her. Hell, I was still stunned that I’d responded that way. Even Drew hadn’t been able to respond. My words knocked the air right out of the office, leaving everyone unsure of how to continue. Drew fled, and then so did I, to Terry’s obvious relief. I hadn’t been able to look him in the eye since then, nor had we had any follow up conversations.
“Damn, Abs, that’s ice cold,” Peyton said, her words blunt.
I really couldn’t argue the point, so I didn’t bother trying. “I don’t know what made me say it. I was just so shocked to see him in Terry’s office. That’s my job. What the hell made him think that was a good idea? What if I’d been fired on the spot?”
I realized now how badly I needed Peyton on my side of this imaginary argument I’d been having with Drew since the surprise meeting on Monday. I hadn’t found the courage to text or call him and he hadn’t reached out to me, either. I hated to leave things as they were, but he’d forced my hand by showing up at the school. The best thing to do was probably not reach out to him, no matter how much the thought of never speaking to Drew again tore me up inside.
