Echoes of the Heart

by Webb, Carole

She sat with Jenny in their box hardly remembering the rest of the performance, thankful when they finally left the confines of the dark theatre and hailed a carriage to Delmonico’s for dinner.

  Jenny ordered champagne cocktails then they sat down to enjoy their meal in the extravagant dining room on the first floor of five, across from the fountain circled with flowers, padded with thick carpet and mahogany furnishings. The mirrored walls reflected the light from silver chandeliers hanging from frescoed ceilings.

  “We must do this again. How about the ballet?”

  Raeden nodded her agreement. “I will get the tickets next time.”

  Jenny leaned forward and lowered her voice. “Two women in the ladies lounge asked me about the gown. I gave them cards like you said.” She chuckled. “And they thought it a man’s name. I didn’t tell them any different.”

  “They will find out soon enough.” Raeden took one sip of her drink and left it then picked at her Maine lobster, still unnerved by the sudden trepidation at the theatre but managed tea and ate iced cream for dessert.

  “Jen, I need to go home now. I have a headache and I’m extremely tired.” She found herself looking in all directions, wishing she had carried her gun while her nervous stomach churned in rebellion like a fire pit of smoldering embers.

  Jenny frowned with brows pulled inward. “Do you want me to see you home?”

  “No, I’ll be fine. I’ve just been working too hard.” She didn’t want to tell Jenny the truth about her apprehension. She did not know Jenny well enough to confide and even if she had, she didn’t know if she would ever tell anyone about the brutal assault by the two men out on the prairie of South Dakota.

  She came back to her apartment, barely undressing before she ran into the bathroom and retched, now knowing the truth of her condition. It appeared Cash had given her a Christmas gift after all.

  Sitting in bed with her head in her hands, Raeden pondered her situation with no doubts about wanting her baby. But what about Cash? He hadn’t mailed back the annulment documents so legally married, he could force her to stay with him or claim the child and take it. The notions became too much to bear.

  At least for now, she could pretend to be a widow. All these fabrications, they had come so easily one after another ever since her involvement with the tall handsome man that twisted her heartstrings and evoked the passions leaving her with his child. All this could wait until tomorrow. At this point, she needed sleep.

  ***

  After a bout of morning sickness, Raeden sat at her favorite café in the Village reading the Times over tea and dry toast. The teacup clanked into the saucer when she turned to the society page. Staring up from the pages, a picture of Cash with his arm intimately around a beautiful woman made her feel a pang of jealousy.

  The caption read, Our newest Senator, Cash Rydell, seen with Senator Mead’s daughter, Estelle. She could read no further before her eyes blurred. How could he do this? He’s still married. He certainly did not seem bothered about his reputation if he did not mind having his picture taken in public with an obvious harlot.

  Rage held back tears while she hurried home, still clutching the newspaper. She threw herself on the bed beating her fists into the pillow and bawled until wholly spent.

  ***

  Jenkins waited in the office when she arrived at the warehouse, a roomy smile glued to his face as he sat in the high back wooden chair by her desk and stood when she entered. “I have good news.”

  She sat behind her desk anxious to hear his report while he pulled out a small stack of papers from his case. “I have contracts from Bird of Paradise and Collette’s. Their agents came by this morning. It seems they have ladies asking about your line.” His eyes glittered with excitement as he leafed through the sketches.

  Raeden could hardly sit still and keep a straight face. “How nice. Go on.”

  “Bird of Paradise arrived first and bought what you’ve completed so far then placed an order for several more gowns when I showed him the illustrations.” He spread out pictures across her desk. “These are what they have requested so far.”

  Bubbling with excitement, Raeden picked them up. “What about Collette’s?” Certainly more than she had hoped for, her excitement mounted while scanning the requested original gowns.

  He spread out more designs. “They ordered all of these, at least a dozen and they want to schedule a fashion show as soon as they are completed. How do you suppose this happened?” His brows folded together creasing his forehead.

  She leaned forward over her desk barely able to hide her elation. “For now, it’s my little secret. Where do I sign? I will need to get started as soon as possible and find more assistants if I am going to get these completed in a reasonable amount of time.”

  After sending Sally on the errand to entice seamstresses away from their low paying piecework positions at the local garment factories, she purchased materials to complete the new contracts and arranged for delivery of six more machines the following day.

  Exhilarated and grateful for the distraction, she fell asleep dreaming of the fashion show sponsored by Collette’s. It would bring her name and designs public, increasing the chance to attain her goal.

  ***

  The doctor only confirmed what she already knew and morning sickness plagued her all hours, making it difficult to eat. More and more she relied on Sally to manage the assembly while she concentrated on the patterns.

  At home, she stayed up all hours to complete a few more sketches for Bird of Paradise at Jenkins’s request and thought of the shock when they found the artist a female before she tore into the bathroom to heave her last meal. With a hand on her middle, she chortled and spoke aloud. “I guess you are going to make this hard on your mother.” She wondered what Cash would think if he could see her now, retching in a basin looking gaunt and thin.

  With not much time to herself, Raeden managed to ride on Sunday enjoying the cool air and the feel of Arte’s energy as he cantered the paths in the park. She made wide circles around men gazing her way and always avoided eye contact. The ridiculous fear must leave sometime. She had connections to make in the world of business. Just pretend—you have become a master at deception.

  ***

  Raeden stood before her mirror the morning of the show applying face powder to the dark circles under her eyes. A bit of rouge detracted from the wan appearance of her face. She had to alter her gown to allow for her weight loss, but the fullness of her breasts might be a distraction to her shrinking frame.

  The overhead lamps lit the runway when Raeden peaked through the corner of the curtains to scan the anxious faces of the audience seated in padded chairs in a horseshoe configuration around the carpet-covered ramp.

  She had just come from the dressing room occupied by chattering models, after examining the fit of each gown. Sally, still making adjustments, would be joining her soon and she hoped she could manage to maintain her composure in her jubilated state.

  The manager of Collette’s stepped beside Raeden. “You must be Designs by Raeden. I must say it had been a shock. I’m Mr. Davis. It’s a pleasure to meet you at last. I’m impressed with your creations and I’m sure we will see a lot more of each other.” She hoped fervently he would not touch her while she forced herself to remain calm.

  She stretched a smile across her face, hoping the tension did not show. Forcing a hand forward she let him grasp it. “Nice to make your acquaintance. I hope you and Mr. Jenkins will keep me busy.” He smiled and nodded his agreement.

  The lights blinked announcing the commencement and Mr. Davis walked to center stage while she trembled and took deep breaths, arranging the folds of her dress. She heard nothing of what he said until he announced her name. “And who better to describe our creations this afternoon than the designer herself. May I present, Mrs. Raeden Newell?”

  Raeden stiffed her back and smiled while she stepped out on the small stage twirling in her avocado colored satin gown, allowing the skirts to billo
w around before taking the dais. The astonished crowd, heads bent in whispers gave her a polite round of applause.

  She relaxed after the wholehearted acceptance of the first gown sewn in deep amethyst with a lilac gauze over-skirt and bare shoulders except for thin sleeves encircling the upper arm at each side with a train flowing from the bustle. Raeden continued with pleasure while she enjoyed seeing the fruits of her labor on exhibit, at last.

  At the halfway mark, she began feeling sick and her mind raced seeking a solution to her dilemma. She fought the urge back and quickly announced. “The second half of our show will be conducted by my superintendent and head seamstress, Mrs. Sally Wentworth.” She walked quickly off the stage.

  Sally stood on the sideline, eyes wide open in shock. “What are you doing Rae? I can’t do it.”

  “Yes you can, Sally. I need you. All this excitement has made me unwell. You know as much, if not more than I do. Now go out there and don’t forget to show off your gown.” She tore into the ladies room to take care of her problem. After freshening up her face, she smiled at her reflection. Your timing is perfect, little one.

  She received deafening accolades when she walked back onstage pulling Sally gently by the hand to accept her share of the glory. Not until that time, had she noticed a photographer who requested a smile for the camera.

  Avoiding the champagne, she managed to circulate through the crowded reception without feeling ill. All but one gown sold, held for a friend of a friend. Being originals, Sally made appointments for alterations.

  All the glitter and din ebbed so Raeden and Sally changed into the clothing they had brought along, leaving their gowns for Bird of Paradise’s display window in the front of the store, Raeden’s idea to enhance popularity and requested a sign placed by the exhibit.

  After an additional trip to the ladies room, Raeden looked in the mirror and decided she looked as tired as she felt. Raeden emerged to see a man stand from a chair where he had apparently been waiting and moved slowly toward her and Sally. She tensed but did not allow it to show.

  “Let me introduce myself, Mrs. Newell. I am Andre Dupree, spokesman for the annual Fleur de France show in Paris.”

  She held out a hand, and he slowly raised it to his lips then released her. Raeden tensed but did not draw back, hoping the fear she felt did not show.

  “And this is my manager, Mrs. Sally Wentworth.” He followed suit and raised her hand as well.

  “It is a pleasure to meet you both.” His sleek dark hair, elegant style and handsome face made up for his short stature. His turquoise eyes sparkled like sunlight on tropical waters reflecting from the gas lamps adorning the walls of the store. The heavy French accent only added to his charm.

  She stood erect, ignoring the fatigue, waiting for him to state his business so she could go home, soak in a hot bath and relax.

  “I have space for one more entry in our lineup this summer and I would like it to be one of your stunning gowns.”

  Her heart pounded against her rib cage while she spoke in a controlled voice and spoke in French. “I am honored, Monsieur Dupree. Of course I will be there.” She remembered the baby and added. “What is the date exactly?”

  “Ah, I see you speak French, It will make it much easier for you when you arrive. The date is the first of July. I will drop by your office with the necessary forms before I sail.” He bowed at the waist then said his good-byes and stated he would be anxious for her arrival in Paris to boast about his ability to find the finest talent.

  Following his departure, Raeden turned to Sally unable to contain the jubilance exploding inside. “Sally, do you know what this means? We are an overnight success!”

  Fifty-two

  Cash stood on the steps of the White House watching the ladies of the Woman’s Suffrage movement march past carrying their banners and signs, demanding representation and treatment as equals. A smile curled his lips thinking he might see Raeden at any moment at the demonstration waving a poster insisting on the ear of President Caldwell. Perhaps next session he would work on equal rights for women along with his other passion.

  Sitting back in the chair at his desk, he thought of the past weeks and the disappointments he had endured trying to make his voice heard and understood by the other politicians. He had devoted many long hours of discussion with each Senator, sometimes using devious tactics to obtain their consideration.

  After compiling his research, Cash had drafted his Bill with the assistance of Wilcox, predicting close results in spite of his major adversary the distinguished Senator Charles Dutton. A man with a vapid prejudice against the Indians, having a nephew massacred, he caused dissension at each turn.

  He had also heard rumors implicating Dutton in a land-grabbing scheme to mine silver and gold in the Black Hills. The speculations remained unsubstantiated however, while the malignant greediness of humanity grated on Cash’s sense of justice like fingernails on a chalkboard.

  The numerous press releases he had sent showed only minor public support and failed to sway many anti-votes in his favor, a precarious slim majority held together by sheer determination on Cash’s part.

  The Bill, recorded and numbered, passed to the Body and then assigned to the Indian Affairs Committee for review. During the process, Cash diligently solicited support and participated in many long lunches and dinners to discuss issues in a casual atmosphere, attempting to sway their approval and gain a bare-bones advantage.

  Once rewritten with the Committee’s stipulations, the amended petition moved to seek approval on the Congressional Floor. At this point, Cash began to gain confidence only to have Senator Dutton place a senatorial hold on his Bill, ending its fragile existence before it could advance to the Floor.

  Thrown into the web of disappointment, Cash hid his desire to strangle Dutton with his bare hands and renewed his pledge to continue the fight during the next session. He hired a private investigator to dig for information on Dutton, hoping to find something to discredit his name and get him out of the way.

  While Congress tied up loose ends, Cash spent the remainder of his spare time back in the Library ferreting out bits of information to advance his cause for the next Session and educated himself on all the Suffrage movements, ready to gear up a battle in that arena as well.

  Before leaving Washington, he made a visit to Arlington Cemetery, amazed at the number of causalities from the Civil War. Awed by the expanse appearing to be miles, he wondered how long it would take before it became full.

  He rode the Sister’s Ferry to the right bank of the Potomac River and viewed fields spreading over acres in Virginia and West Virginia then took a paddle-wheel boat up the left bank into Maryland observing the dormant tobacco fields.

  During his stay in Washington, he remained lonely, thinking of Raeden constantly and couldn’t help thinking what his stay would have been like if she had been with him. Cash had expected after all the passing weeks, he could have been able to put her out of his mind. Keeping busy had helped, but now he had idle time, and it became worse, like a piece of him was missing. She plagued every waking moment and his dreams as well. He could hardly wait to get back to Chamberlain, to his ranch. At least there, he could occupy his time with hard physical labor.

  ***

  In the midst of packing, he ran across the discarded papers sent by Raeden regarding the annulment, and recalled on first reading how he had flung them into the cold ashes of the fireplace then drank whiskey until he fell into a crater of desolation, finally passing out. The thought of her free to find someone else made him so jealous, the notion of dragging her back became almost a reality.

  Once sober, he realized he would have to confront her sometime and put an end to this mental warfare before he would find any peace then picked the documents out of the ashes and stored them away.

  He had seen her picture in the paper and read about her success. It had always been what she wanted, anything else had just been an illusion to torment him if his mind idled or when
he attempted to sleep.

  He tossed them into his luggage while a hole in his gut once filled by Raeden gnawed.

  ***

  At the Chamberlain station, Cash unloaded his frisky filly and talked gently while stroking her neck. She pranced at the end of her lead, but settled when Cash reached for the blanket and saddle. She butted his rear when he tightened the cinch strap making him grin. “You’re ready to go home, aren’t you girl?”

  Still too early for spring thaw so far north, he gazed at the familiar sight of snow-covered hills and the feel of untainted air filling his chest. His mind wandered to Dull Knife, wondering how they fared in the Canadian Territory and felt remorse he had failed them. He would be ready to take up the fight at the end of the year, hoping it would not be too late. He would never give up.

  Cash strode through the mud to the wagon where Slim waited, shook his hand and slapped his arm with the other. “Good to see you, buddy. How are things at the ranch?”

  “Better than expected, the old boy’s been busy. We’ll have a lotta’ spring calves.”

  Holding back one package, Cash tossed his cases in the back of the wagon laden with dry goods. “You can fill me in later. Why don’t you get started, I’ll catch up.” He watched Slim for a few minutes driving toward the ranch, grateful for his friendship and ability to manage while he fulfilled his duty in Washington.

  Clad in his old jeans and the familiar weight of the six-gun on his hip he strode toward Mike’s wagons and greeted his friend then helped him load. “Diane’s been waiting to see you ever since Slim mentioned your arrival. Why don’t you stop by the store?”

  “I’ll do it on my way into town.” He really didn’t feel like visiting with Diane. It would only stir up memories he didn’t wish to deal with at this time.

  He kicked mud from his boots before entering and Diane jumped from her seat in the small office. Running out she grasped him in an embrace. “I’m so glad you are back. It’s not the same without you around.”