Just Like Heaven

by Clarissa Carlyle

  “Doubt you needed it.”

  “Well my Dad watches him when I’m at the hospital.”

  “At the hospital?” Arthur echoed, a slight strain of worry entering his voice.

  “I work there, I’m training to be a nurse,” Demi explained.

  “What, really? Just like you’d always dreamed!” Arthur nodded, impressed.

  “Yeah,” Demi found herself blushing like a school girl and desperately hated herself for doing so.

  “Didn’t Jared tell you?”

  “Jared?” Arthur asked, confused at the mention of his brother.

  “Yeah, he’s been in and out of hospital lately with various problems.”

  “What?” Arthur asked, visibly pained by the information. “I didn’t know that,” he shook his head sadly and looked down in to his hands.

  “There’s so much people don’t tell me these days.”

  ####

  As the yellow cab wove through the hectic streets of the city Demi began to feel more and more like an alien. She wasn’t used to the hustle and bustle of urban life and it made her nervous.

  “That’s where I work,” Arthur stated proudly as they drove past yet another glass giant. Demi craned her neck to see out the window, unable to make out the top of the building as it disappeared from her view.

  All she saw was a cold, lifeless building make of concrete and glass. She wasn’t sure why Arthur was so proud to work there.

  “What is it you do there?” she asked politely.

  “I work for a steel company. My role is basically buying and selling, dealing directly with clients.” Arthur explained.

  “Like a salesman?”

  Arthur cringed at the label.

  “It’s more complicated than that,” he said tersely.

  ####

  At last they reached Arthur’s apartment. Logan was now fast asleep so Demi had to carry him in her arms as Arthur hauled her luggage in to the elevator.

  “I’m on the twentieth floor,” he told her as he pressed the relevant button.

  “That sounds awfully high,” Demi said nervously, strengthening her embrace around the sleeping Logan.

  Most women who came in to the elevator with Arthur were always really impressed to find that he lived so high up and would be quick to show it. Yet again he found himself feeling unsure around Demi as she didn’t behave like anyone else.

  “I’m sure your apartment will be lovely,” Demi smiled kindly.

  It wasn’t. At least not to her. It was an all open plan, one giant room which contained the kitchen, the living area, the bed. Everything in one place except for the small bathroom which was thankfully sectioned off.

  The apartment was sparsely furnished and what was there was made from black leather and cold steel. The bare brick of the walls showed, not covered by paint or art. It was a complete bachelor pad and therefore completely inappropriate for a small child to stay in.

  “Where will Logan and I sleep?” she asked anxiously, noting that there was only one, king sized bed present which appeared to have satin sheets.

  “You can have the bed and I’ll take the sofa.”

  Demi didn’t like this suggestion but knew there were no other options. She couldn’t afford to go and book her and Logan in to the nearest hotel which was exactly what she wanted to do.

  “I know it’s not very homely,” Arthur sighed, never before having to apologize for the décor he had chosen.

  “Its fine,” Demi stated but her eyes and posture said different.

  All she wanted was to go to sleep and for the day to be over. The exhaustion of travelling across the country with a four year old had finally caught up with her.

  “I’m just really tired,” she sighed.

  “Let me fix you and Logan something to eat,” Arthur suggested as he headed over to the kitchen area.

  “What do you have?” Demi asked, carefully placing Logan on the bed before joining Arthur at his open refrigerator.

  Glancing in, she saw it was stocked with champagne, strawberries, chocolate and beer. Nothing she could feed a small child with. He didn’t even have milk to make cereal.

  “What do you eat?” Demi asked, baffled by the contents.

  “I eat out,” Arthur shrugged, “it’s what everyone does here.”

  “You don’t cook your own meals?”

  “No, Demi, this is New York city. Some of the best restaurants in the world are here.” There was a harshness to his tone which Demi didn’t like.

  “My, aren’t you doing well then.”

  “Don’t be like that.”

  “Do you even have anything to eat?”

  “No, I guess not,” Arthur said lamely as he looked into the refrigerator.

  “We’ll get some stuff tomorrow,” Demi sighed. “The city may have the best food in the world but it doesn’t matter to a four year old. He likes what he likes.”

  Arthur slammed the door the refrigerator shut and went to sit on the couch, suddenly regretting buying an open plan apartment.

  “I’ve never looked after a kid before, I don’t know what to do!” he moaned, careful not to raise his voice as Logan was still sleeping soundly.

  “Don’t worry about it,” Demi said, eager to sleep and leave the city and Arthur as soon as possible. She should have known they wouldn’t get on. What did she expect, that he’d welcome her with open arms and be a changed man? She’d been a fool to come there.

  ####

  The following day both Demi and Arthur awoke feeling fresh and clutching to the promise that a new day would bring about a new start.

  Once Logan was up and dressed, they all headed out in the city to get some breakfast. The sidewalks were amazingly busy. Demi clutched on to Logan as tight as she could, scared that if she lost her grip he’d be lost forever to the sea of people around them.

  Arthur normally strode along without a care in the world. He would have his music on and be checking out any hot girls who passed by.

  Today was different, he was focused solely on Demi and Logan and ensuring them safe passage to the small café a few blocks away. He surprised himself with just how protective he felt towards them.

  “It’s so busy,” Demi exclaimed. “Is it always like this?”

  “Yep, every day,” Arthur answered from just behind her.

  They managed to reach the café unscathed and picked a table by the window as Logan was fascinated by all the foot traffic. He’d never seen so many people before and loved it.

  Demi settled in to her chair suddenly feeling extremely awkward. The last time she’d sat down in a café with Arthur, he had left her. It was hard to push those memories aside and concentrate on the current moment.

  “What does he like?” Arthur asked, glancing down at the menu and then at Logan who was standing on his chair, hands pressed to the window.

  “Logan, sit down,” Demi ordered and reluctantly the little boy did as his mother asked.

  “Right now he’s into pancakes.”

  “Pancakes!” Logan cried gleefully on cue.

  “See.”

  “Well, pancakes are good. I’ll join you.” Arthur smiled.

  “Make that three,” Demi said, placing her menu down.

  As they waited on their food Demi tried to talk to Arthur, to engage with him as she once had, convinced the boy she’d fallen in love with was still in there, but Logan made it difficult as he constantly wanted their attention.

  “So what do you do here when you aren’t working?” she asked.

  “I put maple syrup on my pancakes,” Logan began explaining to Arthur.

  “You do, that’s cool,” he answered his son first and then turned to Demi. “I go out, have dinner, that sort of stuff.”

  “Go on many dates?” Demi hated herself for asking the question but it came blurting out before she could stop it.

  Arthur blushed before her and seemed flustered.

  “Yeah, a few,” he admitted.

  “Good for you,” Demi
managed to sound amiable even though inside she was seething. She was starting to hate Arthur for having his life out in the city, a life which clearly hadn’t been at all hampered by abandoning her and Logan.

  “What about you? Are you seeing anyone?” Arthur asked casually.

  Demi felt taken aback by just how breezily he’d delivered the question, as though he didn’t care at all about the answer.

  “No, I’m not seeing anyone; I don’t have the time, what with Logan and work.”

  “He could always come stay with me sometime if you wanted some time to yourself,” Arthur suggested.

  “What? So I can date? You want me to date?” Demi asked, feeling confused and sick all at the same time.

  “I want you to be happy.”

  Demi didn’t want to cry. She didn’t want to sit in yet another café and shed tears for Arthur Cooper.

  She thought he’d still care for her as he once did but it was obvious now that he didn’t. Fighting back the tears, Demi leant across the table and roughly pulled his arm towards her, using her other hand to pull up his shirt sleeve to reveal his tattoo, which while faded by time was still a stark and obvious reminder of what had once been between them.

  “It wasn’t much of a promise, was it?” she stated bitterly, referring to the contents of the lyric.

  Arthur pulled his arm back and quickly shoved his shirt back down.

  “Demi-”

  “Do you look at it and remember what we had or is it just a painful reminder of a time you’d rather forget?” she demanded, suddenly losing her appetite for the pancakes which had just arrived.

  “Demi-”

  “Well?”

  “I look at each day and remember what I lost,” Arthur admitted honestly, hating himself for being so vulnerable when he wanted to be strong in Demi’s eyes.

  “Really?” Demi said, her voice softening.

  “Really,” Arthur confirmed, smiling shyly at her.

  The moment between them was abruptly broken when a female voice said Arthur’s name.

  “Arthur!”

  Demi looked up to see a stunning blonde woman looking down on their table. She was dressed in a figure hugging dress and high, black shoes. Her makeup and hair were immaculate, nothing was out of place.

  In contrast, Demi wore worn jeans and a sweatshirt, her hair casually tied back in a ponytail. She felt herself shrivel in the glow of the stunning blonde.

  “Marie, urgh, hi,” Arthur spluttered awkwardly.

  “I thought it was you when I walked by the window. Well this is your neighbourhood.” Marie said, eyeing Demi and Logan suspiciously as she spoke.

  Demi returned the look, wondering if this was one of the women Arthur had been dating. If so, there was no way he’d ever be interested in Demi again. She was too dowdy in contrast. The last time she’d worn her high heels was at prom!

  “Just getting breakfast,” Arthur smiled nervously.

  He wished Marie would leave. He could see her eyeing Demi and Logan and knew she’d start asking questions, questions he’d be unable to answer.

  “So who’s this?” she tried to send a friendly smile at Logan but he saw through her falseness and stuck his tongue out rudely.

  “Logan!” Demi said, secretly loving that he’d done it.

  “This is Demi and Logan,” Arthur explained, knowing that Marie would need more details than that.

  “Demi is an old friend from high school staying in the city for a few days.” It wasn’t a lie it just wasn’t the complete truth.

  “How nice,” Marie smiled falsely. “Yes I didn’t think you were from around here,” she added as she eyed Demi’s outfit up and down.

  Demi felt her cheeks flush at the blatant insult and knew she’d had enough of New York, of Arthur, of all of it.

  “Actually we need to leave,” she said as she began collecting her things together.

  “Our flight is in a few hours.” It wasn’t, she’d need to book a new one.

  “Demi-” Arthur got up to stop her but she was already grabbing Logan in her arms and leaving the café.

  Feeling panicked, Arthur hurriedly paid the cheque and ran after her and his son.

  “What are you doing?” he called out to her as she quickly made her way through the throng of people, desperate to create some distance between her and the café.

  “I’m leaving!” Demi declared.

  “But why?” Arthur demanded, having easily caught up with her. He placed a strong hand on her shoulder, causing her to cease walking.

  “I’m just a friend from home, what do you care?” she asked bitterly. In her arms Logan sensed the animosity and began to cry.

  “You know you’re more than that.”

  “Then why didn’t you say something!”

  “Because I work with Marie, I can’t go telling her how I’d abandoned my son, what would people think of me? I’d lose my job!”

  “That’s your problem you are always looking out for yourself and no one else!” Demi yelled, in her arms Logan was now wailing mournfully.

  “Look,” Arthur began, wanting to apologize, wanting to make everything right, wanting to make his son stop crying.

  “I’m leaving. I was an idiot to come here in the first place!”

  “Please don’t go!”

  “I’m already cramping your style for your many dates!” Demi snapped as the tears began to roll down her cheeks.

  “Demi, you’re not!”

  “I’m leaving!”

  ####

  Three hours later and Demi was sat with Logan in the departure lounge of the airport. Arthur had begged her to stay, promising he wanted her there but she didn’t believe him, the damage had already been done.

  Hearing him refer to her as just a friend had almost broken what remained of her heart. She wanted to go home, to return to Collinswood and feel safe in familiar surroundings around people who loved and cared for her.

  In New York she was a stranger. No one cared if she cried; no one asked if she was alright.

  Her flight would soon be leaving and New York and Arthur would become yet another painful memory.

  “Who was that man?” Logan asked in between mouthfuls of potato chips which he greedily pulled from the bag.

  “Who?” Demi asked, feeling distracted.

  “Arffer,” Logan mumbled.

  “Arthur,” Demi clarified. “Oh he’s…just a friend.”

  “Will we see him again?”

  “I don’ think so, sweetheart.”

  The call for her flight echoed through the lounge and Demi rose to her feet, collecting Logan and her bags and headed towards her relevant gate, grateful to be going home.

  ####

  Now that Demi was gone Arthur’s apartment had never felt so empty. He sat on his bed, head in his hands, wondering what had gone so wrong?

  In his mind it would all have worked out so very differently. He’d have instantly bonded with Logan, his son, and when he fell asleep at night he and Demi would reconcile and fall in to each other’s arms.

  But then what? Demi’s life was in Collinswood, his was in the city. But what sort of a life did he have?

  Alone and despondent, Arthur finally reflected on the choices he had in his life and didn’t like what he saw.

  ####

  “I’m sorry it didn’t go well,” Demi’s Dad sounded sincere as he made her a hot chocolate on the stove.

  “You were right,” Demi sighed sadly.

  “Yes but I didn’t want to be.”

  “Yeah, I know.”

  “New York City is such a big, strange place. It changes people.” He said as he placed down the mug of hot chocolate before his daughter.

  “Dad, we both know that Arthur changed long before he went to New York.”

  “That’s true.”

  Her Dad sat down across from her and regarded her with sad, concerned eyes.

  “Did Logan get on with him?”