The Rat Brain Fiasco #1
Page 1
Table of Contents
Copyright Page
Title Page
Dedication
CHAPTER ONE - THE MEETING
CHAPTER TWO - THE ARRIVAL
CHAPTER THREE - THE HOMECOMING
CHAPTER FOUR - THE NURSE
CHAPTER FIVE - THE DUNGEON
CHAPTER SIX - THE CAFETERIA
CHAPTER SEVEN - THE CLASSROOM
CHAPTER EIGHT - THE HEADMASTER’S OFFICE
CHAPTER NINE - THE ASSIGNMENT
CHAPTER TEN - THE CADILLAC
CHAPTER ELEVEN - THE PHONE CALL
CHAPTER TWELVE - THE MACHINE
CHAPTER THIRTEEN - THE DREAM
CHAPTER FOURTEEN - THE TANK
CHAPTER FIFTEEN - THE PRESENTATION
CHAPTER SIXTEEN - THE ATTACK
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN - THE DOOR
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN - THE END?
Teaser chapter
Acknowledgements
About the Authors
GROSSET & DUNLAP
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Copyright © 2010 by Julie Berry and Sally Gardner. All rights reserved. Published by Grosset & Dunlap, a division of Penguin Young Readers Group, 345 Hudson Street, New York, New York 10014. GROSSET & DUNLAP is a trademark of Penguin Group (USA) Inc. S.A.
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To the original disruptive boys.
I love you dearly. You’re still in trouble.
—J.G.B.
To my nephews, Keith, Johnny, Kiff, Seth,
Joseph, Wes, Daniel, Adam, and David.
—S.F.G.
A Word of Warning to All Disruptive Boys
The story you are about to read is true.
If parents or teachers try to tell you otherwise, don’t believe them. They’re part of the conspiracy, trying to make you believe in chocolate chip cookies and happy endings, while secretly they plot your doom.
They definitely don’t want you knowing about places like Splurch Academy for Disruptive Boys.
It’s possible they’ve already begun filling out your application.
Cody Mack had never heard of Splurch Academy. He had no idea he was in danger, just from a few disruptive stunts here and there.
And look what happened to him.
Wait. You don’t know yet what happened to him. But you will.
This book is here to warn you, to save you from a fate like Cody’s. I won’t say, “Stop being disruptive forever,” because I might as well tell a hound not to bark, but I will say, “You might want to tone it down a notch,” or just, “Keep a very close eye on your parents,” and maybe also, “Look through their papers to see if they’ve been in contact with Dr. Archibald Farley, the headmaster.”
You don’t yet know who Dr. Archibald Farley is, or why you should fear him.
It’s far safer to meet Dr. Farley in the pages of this book than to face him in real life.
Read and be warned. Read and be wise. Read and know what really happens to disruptive boys once they’ve crossed that line.
I suspect you still don’t believe me.
In that case, all I can say is farewell.
And good luck.
CHAPTER ONE
THE MEETING
Cody Mack swung his legs back and forth as he sat in the plastic chair outside Principal Small’s conference room. What was taking so long? Usually when his parents were called in, which seemed to be every other day, it was a short meeting, with words like “lock” and “room” and “had it this time.” But from the voices coming through the keyhole, this meeting needed longer words, and lots of them. “Breakthrough brain research.” “Remedial neuro-therapies.” “Patented techniques.” And it wasn’t just his parents and the principal. There was another voice, a deep one. What on earth were they talking about?
He slid off the chair and pressed his ear to the keyhole.
Just then, the door opened and out came Ms. Robusto, Principal Small’s secretary.
“Mr. Mack,” she sniveled. “Would you be so kind as to come in?”
Cody followed her. Around the table were his parents, Principal Small, and a tall, old, freaky-looking man who Cody had never seen before.
“Sit down, Cody,” Principal Small said. “We’ve brought in an educational expert to help us solve the problem of you.”
Cody blinked. “The problem of what?”
“The problem of YOU.”
Principal Small rose to his feet, which didn’t really make him any taller. “You see, Cody, in baseball, after three strikes, you’re out. Not in public school. No matter how often your behavior disrupts everything, and makes it impossible for other students to learn, and forces my best teachers to demand early retirement, we are required to keep on teaching you.”
Whew, Cody thought.
“This time, you have pushed us too far. Reports on your bad behavior have filled two whole binders. We’ve had enough!”
Cody tuned out Principal Small’s lecture. It was always the same. His throat felt full of cotton. His shirt collar itched at his neck. I haven’t been that bad lately, have I? he thought. Well, there was that rotten egg thing. Big deal.
And then there was the fire.
Yep, come to think of it, definitely the fire.
That had been a shame, that thing about the fire in the teacher’s lounge.
But other than that, Cody couldn’t see any reason why Principal Small should be this upset.
Then, out of the corner of his eye, Cody saw the freaky old man licking his lips and grinning. Cody could swear he was wearing pointy false teeth, like something you might find in a costume store.
“Well?” Principal Small roared, startling Cody out of his thoughts. “Answer me!”
“Huh?” Cody asked. “Could you please repeat the question?”
“Aaargh! Do you see what I mean, Dr. Farley?” the principal said. “The boy never listens! He’s impossible!”
So that was the freaky geezer’s name. Dr. Farley.
“No, no, no,” Dr. Farley said, flashing a pointy white smile. “He’s like the dozens of other boys that I teach every day. Bright, gifted, clever. Talent and intelligence searching for an outlet.”
Huh? Cody had never heard a teacher say things like that. Not about him, anyway.
“And do you really think you can help him?” Cody’s mother said, her hands clasped together.
“Absolutely, dear lady,” Dr. Farley assured her. “You’ll be overjoyed with the results when we’re through helping your Cody.”
“Help me what?” Cody asked.
Cody’s dad spoke up. “You see, son,” he said, “Dr. Farley is a world-famous specialist in . . . well . . . in naughty kids like you. And your school has decided to send you to his special school, where you can get the best possible education.”
Mrs. Mack dabbed her eyes with a tissue. “You’ll really do that for our Cody?”
“In a heartbeat!” Principal Small said. “And, best of all, he can start immediately.” Principal Small grabbed Dr. Farley’s jacket lapels. “How about tomorrow?”
“Hold on there a second,” Cody gasped. “Tomorrow?”
“Wa-wait a minute! This afternoon? You’re joking, right?”
The adults all shook their heads.
Cody’s stomach turned like he was in an elevator and falling fast. “But it’s almost the end of the school day. Time to go home, anyway. How come Mom doesn’t just drive me there in the morning?”
Dr. Farley adjusted his necktie. “You misunderstand, Master Mack. Splurch Academy for Disruptive Boys is a boarding school. You will not be going home in the afternoons. You will live at the academy with all the other students.”
Cody clapped his hands over his ears. “I can’t hear you, la-la-la-la . . .”
Dr. Farley laughed. Even with his ears covered, Cody could hear him say, “Ah, young Cody, you might not believe me now, but I can promise you that at Splurch Academy, you’ll feel right at home.”
Ms. Robusto cut in. “We’ll need a signed consent form from the parents, of course.”
Dr. Farley handed some papers and a feather pen to Cody’s parents.
CHAPTER TWO
THE ARRIVAL
Cody slumped in the backseat of Dr. Farley’s car, feeling bluer than an exploded ballpoint pen. His parents had farmed him out to a boarding school run by some creep who never trimmed his nose hairs! It was more than any kid should suffer. Even if that kid did break into Principal Small’s e-mail and send Ms. Robusto a phony love letter. Still. Nobody deserved this.
Cody slid over so he was behind Dr. Farley and stared at the hair sprouting out of his ears.
Cody’s heart pounded in his chest. He didn’t care. Let the old creep yell at him. It didn’t matter. Cody Mack wasn’t one to be afraid of some dumb principal. That was all a headmaster was.
Dr. Farley got out of the car and turned to open the rear door. His eyes glared and his teeth shone in the light.
Then again, maybe sometimes Cody Mack could be afraid of a principal. Just a little bit.
Cody scrambled to the other side.
Almost in the blink of an eye, Dr. Farley appeared at the other door.
Yikes!
Cody scooted back to where he was before, but Farley was already there waiting for him.
How did he do that?
Cody scooted back one more time, opened the door, and tumbled out. He took off running through the dark woods, sure that at any minute Dr. Farley would snatch him. For an old fizzle-fozzle, he was pretty quick.
But when Cody looked over his shoulder, there was no sign of anyone following him. Soon he heard Dr. Farley’s car engine start and drive away.
Up ahead, through the trees, Cody saw a light. Was it a house? It must be. Whoever lived there would help a lost kid, wouldn’t they? He doubled his speed.
But the light he saw wasn’t coming from a house.
Cody’s feet crunched to a stop in the fallen autumn leaves. Splurch Academy! The prison itself. He turned to run back toward the road.
But he hadn’t gone two steps when he saw Dr. Farley appear from the shadows.
Cody crouched down low and tensed his legs. There had to be a trap.
A night bird screeched and a wolf howled. Dr. Farley leaned against a tree trunk and folded his arms as if he had all the time in the world.
“Of course, if you ran all the way to the road, you might flag someone down who could help you,” Farley said. “The funny thing is, boys who run away from my school never seem to make it as far as the road. Perhaps you could be the first.”
Cody felt caught, like a moth in a lamp. He stared at Dr. Farley. How could he be so ugly? How was it even possible? And what was with those teeth of his? Were they getting bigger?
“I have a proposal for you, Cody,” Dr. Farley said. “A deal. You come with me now, into Splurch Academy, behave yourself and obey the rules. That means no escaping, no devious pranks, no impertinence.” Farley unfolded his arms and took a step closer to Cody. “Do everything right and I promise nothing bad will happen to you.”
Cody gulped at this. “Whaddya mean, nothing bad?”
Dr. Farley shrugged. “You’ll be safe.”
“Safe from what?”
“From the things that go ‘bump’ in the night.” There were those teeth again. “And worse.”
Cody’s heart pounded in his chest.
“If you don’t cooperate, there are no guarantees,” Farley said. “Accidents do happen. These woods are filled with ferocious beasts.” He chuckled. “As for your behavior, the Farley Method is famous for fixing bad boys. Or rather, it soon will be.”
Chills crawled all over Cody’s skin. The Farley Method? What was that, weeklong visits to the torture chamber?
A cold wind blew across the dark lawns and spiraled up around the towers of Splurch Academy.
“I take it you’ve decided to stay,” Dr. Farley said, giving Cody’s shoulder a painful squeeze. “In that case, march inside. Your new classmates are dying to meet you.”
CHAPTER THREE
THE HOMECOMING
They reached the top of the steps. Dr. Farley pulled on a long rope, and Cody heard bells ring inside. Funeral bells.
Footsteps approached. Slowly, slowly the door creaked open. A bald, stooped man stood in the doorway holding a candle. The badge hanging around his neck read: HALL MONITOR.
“Masssterrrr,” he said.
“Good evening, Ivanov,” Dr. Farley said, pushing past him and dragging Cody along the gloomy hallways. He yanked a door open and shoved Cody inside a small room.
They left the camera room and trudged down the corridors. Flickering candles at the end of each hall provided the only light. Cody glimpsed cobwebs hanging on the doors of old, broken lockers and gross drinking fountains covered with strange-colored mold. A stick figure scratched into the paint on a locker showed kids with crosses for eyes. Dead kids. Dead meat.
Their footsteps echoed back and forth down the long halls. With every step, Cody’s terror grew. How could his parents send him to this place? It was so unreal. It felt like it had to be a joke—like any minute now, someone’s mom dressed in a pumpkin suit would pop up from behind a corner with a plate of cupcakes and candy corn and shout, “Surprise! Happy Halloween!”
But it wasn’t Halloween, and everything was much too real for that. And Cody felt pretty certain that nowhere at Splurch Academy was there a mom.
Dr. Farley dragged Cody out the door and prodded him down the hall. Farley threw open a set of double doors.
When Dr. Farley and Cody walked through the door, everyone froze. The hollering ceased. Then, as fast as you could say “brains,” all the boys slunk back to their seats and sat, staring forward, hands folded in front of them.
These were his classmates?
Wearing prison suits?
Dr. Farley surveyed the room. “Tsk, tsk. Disappointing.” He reached for a clipboard hanging on the wall and scribbled a few notes on it, frowning. He
pointed at one boy and said, “Reginald! Name for me the capital of Turkey.”
Reginald gulped. “Um, Stuffing?”
Dr. Farley’s nostril twitched. “James, do you know the answer?”
James scratched his head. “Cranberry sauce?”
Dr. Farley scribbled something else on the clipboard. Then he turned to a sour-faced woman wearing an apron and a hairnet, pushing a sponge across the cafeteria counter. She looked like she’d lost a bad food fight.
Cody looked at the other boys. They sat limp, staring at their food. Like zombies. Like prisoners. Some of them were watching him out of the corners of their eyes. Most of them were covered in food filth.
Oh no, Cody thought. Cody Mack doesn’t “do” prison. No way. I am not staying here in this loony bin and turning into one of them. I am outta here.
He glanced back up at Farley, who was still talking to Griselda. Slowly, he tiptoed backward. Would the boys rat on him?
He scooted his way back farther.
Nobody said a word.
In fact, Cody could swear some of them were urging him on.
He took another soft step backward.
No tattlers.
Cody had to hand it to those Splurch kids. They were all right. He was almost sorry to ditch them. Yeah, right! He couldn’t get out of there fast enough.