Honor of the Wolf [The Gray Pack 6] (Siren Publishing Classic)

by Lori King

  “He doesn’t deserve your heart then. Don’t let him have so much power over you my darling girl. Lift your chin and show him that you don’t need him.” Este was doing her best to be encouraging, but the words felt wrong. Something about Luke just didn’t make sense. There was true emotion in his eyes earlier, and the sparks between the two had been undeniable. If she had to guess, her money would be on him scaring himself away with the depth of his own reaction to Tavi.

  “I screwed up. I should have said goodnight at the door,” Tavi said, sounding stronger as she tossed the tear stained pillow away. “Never again. I’m done with men who run away from me.”

  “There’s that backbone! How about we get a cup of hot chocolate, and watch an old movie until you’re feeling better? There’s an old Vincent Price movie on that I was watching in my bedroom…”

  Tavi nodded. “I don’t know what I’d do without you, Este.”

  “Oh sure you do, you’d run yourself ragged trying to hold down the fort all by yourself. You may not realize it yet, Octavia, but you’re made of stronger stuff than most people. If that young man was meant for you, things will work out, and if not, consider yourself lucky that you had a night of passion and pleasure, and move on.” She winked as she rose to go start the kettle for the hot chocolate. “I miss the passion I felt for my dear Lawrence.”

  Sympathy filled Tavi’s eyes and Este had to look away. “I have always wanted to find that one special someone that I could give my heart to, and for just a moment I thought…Well, I suppose it doesn’t matter. Obviously the feelings were one-sided.”

  “Perhaps. Or perhaps the feelings were so strong your Luke couldn’t handle them.”

  Snorting, Tavi shook her head. “You didn’t see the look on his face. He seemed almost disgusted.”

  A banging on the front door startled them both, and Tavi shot to her feet as Luke’s voice rang out.

  “Tavi, baby? Please open the door and talk to me. I’m sorry I left like that.”

  The two women stared at the closed door in silence for a moment. Este wasn’t sure what she’d expected from Luke, but he kept surprising her.

  “I can’t talk to him,” Tavi whispered.

  “Why not? You wanted answers, and here he is to give them to you.” Something in her heart told her that these two were genuinely meant to be together, and she was fighting with her protective motherly instincts. She wanted Luke to hurt for causing Tavi pain, but for some reason she was considering opening the door to him, and making Tavi face him head on.

  “Tavi, please! I messed up, but we need to talk.” Luke’s voice called out.

  “What if I don’t like the answers?” Tavi asked her sadly.

  “Then rephrase the question. Or better yet, don’t ask a question. Tell Luke what you need from him, Octavia. Be brave, and show him what you’re made of. In my experience men are more sensitive to love and rejection than women. They fight their own emotions because they don’t think they’re worthy of having them. Maybe your man really has realized the error of his ways.”

  Luke was still calling out and knocking, as Este made her way back to her bedroom leaving the two lovers to work out their own differences. Her heart ached with sorrow for the man she’d given her heart to over forty years ago. There wasn’t a day that went by that she didn’t miss her husband with all of her heart. If Tavi and Luke were meant to be, they would find a way to be together. It was time for Tavi to realize her own potential. She’d faced more adversity than anyone should have to bear, but Este saw the strength in her. She saw the fire, and somehow she knew that Luke was just the person to stoke it.

  Luke knocked on the door until his knuckles ached and his arm was tired. It was clear Tavi was inside, he could see her shadow through the gauzy white curtains over the window, but she wasn’t coming any closer. He couldn’t say what he needed to say standing on the step. The neighbors would never understand. Hell, he wasn’t sure he could make Tavi understand.

  “Tavi, when you’re ready, open the door and just listen to what I have to say for five minutes. I know I fucked up. I ran out on you when I promised I wouldn’t. I got scared, baby. That’s my only defense. When something gets too big for me to handle, I bail. I’m not cut out for a relationship.” He paused, and swallowed the lump in his throat. “I can’t tell you how sorry I am for hurting you. But, Tavi I have to talk to you. There’s something about me that you don’t know!”

  Silence was the only response to his words, and frustration started to set in. Resting his forehead against the hard wooden door, he let out a heavy sigh.

  “Damn it, Tavi, please. This is a matter of life or death. You have to know—”

  The door suddenly swung open and he nearly face planted on her entryway floor. Her face was paper-white and her chin trembled, but her eyes were blazing with fury.

  “What did you give me? An STD? Do you have an STD?”

  “What?” Luke asked. “No! I’m clean, baby, but—”

  Tavi started to close the door. “Then we have nothing else to say to each other.”

  Shoving his foot in the doorway, Luke growled at her. “Wait! Damn it woman, there’s still a lot I have to say.”

  “Well, I have no interest in listening. You got what you wanted, Luke. You fucked me out of your system. Bully for you, you got the single mom to break her own rules and sleep with you. Now, add the notch to your bedpost and we’ll both move on,” Tavi said coldly.

  Rage flooded Luke’s system. “Is that all you think you are? A notch in my bed? Some sort of conquest?”

  She shrugged belligerently and remained silent.

  “No, Tavi. Never. You were never a conquest. I mean, I wanted you, desperately, but… Fuck I made a mess of this.” He shoved his fingers into his hair in exasperation. “Look, I need to tell you something, but I don’t want to do it on your front stoop in the middle of the night. Can I come in?”

  “No. Say what you need to and go home. I’m tired and I have a long day of job applications ahead of me tomorrow.”

  He clenched his jaw, and shook his head. “I can’t say it here, Tavi, but it’s imperative that we talk.”

  “We are talking, but we seem to be talking in circles, Luke. If what you want to say is so important then say it so that I can shut the door. It’s cold outside.” She sounded so different now, as though all of the joy that had been inside of her was gone, and it made his wolf howl in his head. He’d hurt her when he ran away, and now he was in over his head.

  “Tomorrow then, can I talk to you tomorrow? After we’ve both had some sleep?”

  “I’m busy. I know you don’t believe this, Luke, but it’s really okay if we never see each other again. I’m not interested in having a booty call buddy.”

  Snarling loudly, Luke could feel his wolf on the edge of control. “You’re not a goddamn booty call for me. You’re my mate!”

  Her eyes widened, and she laughed. “Your mate? What are we now? Neanderthals?”

  Hissing with frustration, he took the uninvited step into her doorway, and grabbed her arm tugging her up against his chest. She pushed back trying to keep the distance between them as he snapped, “No, baby, we’re werewolves.”

  Before she could respond he dropped his lips to hers and claimed her mouth as deeply as she’d claimed his soul.

  Like lightning in a bottle Tavi was unable to resist the erotic force behind Luke’s kiss, and she opened to accept it before she had a chance to think it through. She’d heard his declaration, but clearly he was kidding. There was no such thing as werewolves. He just wanted a chance to kiss her again.

  Forcing herself to push him away she gasped for air. Her body was on fire and something seemed to be pressing against the inside of her chest. Like it was trying to reach through her ribs and hold Luke closer.

  “Stop it. If you’re not going to be serious—”

  Luke frowned. “Oh I’m serious all right.” He pushed the door shut behind him, and pulled her over to the couch. The sam
e couch that she’d been crying on just a short while ago. Her knees crumpled underneath her and she plopped onto the cushion.

  “What do you mean? Werewolves? Really? At least try to come up with a good excuse, Luke.”

  “Tavi, I’ve never shared this secret with anyone. It’s a matter of life and death for my pack if the secret gets out, so you have to swear this will stay between us.” Luke looked so serious. It was unsettling. She heard his words, but she couldn’t comprehend why he thought this joke was funny.

  “It’s true, Tavi. I’m a werewolf, and thanks to my reckless actions you are, too, now.” He was running his fingers through his hair nervously, and rocking on the balls of his feet.

  “Sit down. You’re making me nervous,” she murmured. Her voice sounded hollow to her ears.

  “Did you hear me?” Luke asked, taking a seat next to her and pulling her hand over into his lap.

  “I heard. I just don’t understand why you’re doing this.”

  “Tavi, I’m trying to prepare you. I bit you, and I came inside of you. My DNA will change yours.” Luke’s eyes seemed to see into her soul, and she looked away.

  “I think you should leave.”

  He shook his head. “I can’t leave until you understand.”

  “Understand what, Luke? That you’re completely mad? Or that you think I’m going to buy this load of bullshit you’re trying to sell me?” She launched herself off the couch and marched back to the front door. “You know, I may not have a lot of experience with men, but I’m not quite as naïve as you seem to believe. I want you out of my house. Don’t bother coming back. I won’t open the door.”

  Luke walked toward her, and she had to stare at the bridge of his nose to avoid seeing the pain and frustration in his hazel eyes. “Tavi, I don’t think you’re naïve at all. I screwed up when I bit you. This is all on me, but you’re going to change. There’s no way to stop it now. I don’t want you to go through it alone.”

  “Goodbye, Luke.” She gestured to the door, and waited.

  “I’ll be back tomorrow. We’ll talk more when we’ve both had a good night’s sleep,” he said, going through the door into the night.

  “Don’t bother, I won’t change my tune. We’re done, Luke.”

  He shook his head, and for a brief moment she thought his eyes seemed to glow in the dark. “No, Tavi. We’re far from done, and for that I’m sorry.”

  Without another word, she shut the door and shut him out, sinking against it until she sat on the floor. Exhaustion filled every cell of her body. She couldn’t even summon the energy to go to her bedroom, choosing instead to rest her head against the door and close her eyes. Luke’s words echoed in her ears for what seemed like forever until she finally slipped into sleep.

  Chapter 12

  The next morning Luke arrived at Tavi’s place just as Oren was parking her car in the driveway. The slight man climbed from the driver’s seat and met him on the front sidewalk.

  “Thank you, Oren. Do you need a ride home?” Luke said, accepting the keys on Tavi’s behalf.

  “Well I was going to walk over to my son’s house, he lives a couple of blocks south of here, but if you don’t mind…”

  The front door opened, and both men turned to see Tavi and Este step onto the porch. Tavi was dressed in a pair of pajama pants that had cookies all over them, and a sweatshirt that said D.A.R.E. on the front.

  “Oren, you’re a lifesaver. I was just telling Este that I needed to go get the car this morning,” Tavi said, rewarding the other man with a bright smile that made Luke’s stomach twist.

  “Oh it’s no problem. I wanted to go back in today and collect my last check anyways. I spoke with Ray about Shane, but it doesn’t look like he’s going to do anything. He wished me luck in my next position,” Oren said, curling his lip in disgust.

  “I’m not surprised. Ray has never had a backbone, and he goes through managers like water through a sieve. They probably did us a favor by canning us,” Tavi said, drawing close enough that Luke could feel the warmth of her body through the thin jacket he wore. It was January in Missouri. What did she think she was doing standing in the cold in nothing but her pajamas?

  Quickly he shoved his jacket off, but when he went to wrap it around her shoulders she stepped away. Without a word, she held her hand out for the keys, and cleared her throat. Luke dropped them into her hand with a frown. Apparently she was still pissed off.

  Once she had the keys, she turned back to Este with a smile. “Este, this is Oren—my knight in shining armor from yesterday.”

  “Lovely to meet you, Oren. Would you like to come inside for a cup of coffee before you run off? I’ve just made a fresh pot,” Este offered, holding the door open.

  Oren grinned as though someone had just handed him a million dollars, and reached up to remove his beat-up ball cap from his balding head. “Don’t mind if I do, ma’am. You ladies have a pretty place here.”

  “It’s Octavia’s really, I just moved in to help her out with Sonny and I keep the house up for her,” Este said as they went into the house leaving Tavi and Luke standing on the front sidewalk.

  For a moment Luke had a flash of hope that she was going to let him speak his piece, but instead she turned on him, anger blazing in her eyes.

  “I told you not to come back.”

  “I had to Tavi, we have to talk about this. You’ll start feeling things soon, and hearing your wolf in your head,” he hissed, trying to keep his voice as low as possible. The last thing he needed was a nosey neighbor overhearing this conversation.

  “So you hear voices in your head, Luke? How long has that been happening? Perhaps you should seek professional help for it,” she said nastily, stepping toward the front door.

  “Why are you being so difficult?” he snapped.

  Slowly, she faced him, the anger gone from her face, and only sadness was left behind. “Difficult? For days you’ve been hitting on me, begging me to go out with you. You’ve asked me what my favorite color is. What my favorite flower is. What my favorite song is. What my name means. And even how I like to be touched…” Her voice cracked, but she swallowed and continued. “Never once did you hear my words. Because if you had, you would have heard me saying I’ve been hurt before. I’ve been rejected and left behind before. Against my instincts, I agreed to one night, and you proved to be just what I thought you were. A one-night wonder who ran the moment he got his rocks off. Now you’re back here, spouting your fairytales and begging me for a chance. Well piss off, Luke. I’m not interested in hearing anything else you have to say. Go home. Go to work. Go to a bar for all I care. Just leave my house, and don’t come back.”

  Before he could reply a car pulled up in front of the house, and a miniature version of Tavi with blonde hair jumped out of the backseat, carrying a backpack and a pillow.

  “Hey Mom!” Sonny called out as she rocketed across the lawn toward Tavi. “Jackie’s mom says to tell you I stayed up late and got up early.”

  Tavi’s entire face changed while Luke watched. The anger and sadness was replaced with hope and joy. The transformation was magnificent and utterly disconcerting. How did a little person have that much control over an adult?

  “I’m not surprised,” Tavi said with a grin as she accepted her daughter’s hug. “I missed you, sweetie.”

  “Missed you, too, Mom.” Sonny shot a curious look his way, and he tried to smile back. It felt like his face was frozen, and the smile tilted awkwardly. “Hi, I’m Sonny.”

  “I’m Luke, it’s nice to meet you, Sonny. You know your mom was wrong about you,” he said, clearing his throat. Both females frowned his direction. “You’re far prettier than she described.”

  Instantly he seemed to have made a friend for life as Sonny rewarded him with a brilliant smile that warmed his heart in ways he’d never felt before. Tavi looked relieved and uncomfortable all at once.

  “She says I’m pretty, but she also says I talk too much. That’s not true though. I have
a lot to say, but I only talk about important things. So, are you my mom’s boyfriend?” Sonny asked candidly, making Tavi choke and turn pale. Luke just nodded and chuckled.

  “Yep, but she was in the process of forgiving me for upsetting her last night. I was just about to ask her out to an early lunch. Maybe you can go with us?” Luke said, taking the opening before Tavi could correct him.

  “That would be fun! Where are we going?” Sonny asked excitedly. Her backpack slipped off her shoulder and she struggled to juggle the heavy bag and her pillow. Luke stepped closer and scooped the bag up, throwing it over his shoulder.

  “I don’t know. I was going to let your mom pick. Do you have any suggestions?”

  Tavi’s mouth hung open and her face was slightly pale. “Luke, that’s not a good idea…”

  “Yes it is, Mom! We haven’t been out to a restaurant in ages. Jackie’s mom ordered pizza for dinner last night, but it had vegetables on it so I didn’t eat much. Only like four slices,” Sonny told Luke conspiratorially.

  Luke pretended to be appalled. “Well that’s just a travesty, but surely you don’t want pizza again if you just had it last night—”

  “Yes I do! I love pizza!” Sonny turned to her mom and grabbed her hand. “Please, Mom! You can’t turn him down. I’ll just die if I don’t get pizza in me ASAP.”

  Rolling her eyes Tavi shook her head at her daughter’s dramatic claim. “I’m fairly certain no one has died from lack of pizza. Didn’t you have breakfast?”

  “Oh yeah, Jackie’s dad made French toast this morning. It was really good, but I’m starving again. Really, I’m wasting away as we speak. Where’s Mrs. Codger?” Sonny’s attention span darted around faster than Luke could keep up.

  “She’s inside with Oren,” Tavi answered automatically.

  “Oren’s here?” Sonny asked with wide eyes. “Wow! It’s like a party.”

  Before Tavi could respond Luke reached out and put his hand on Sonny’s shoulder. “We better go in and say hello. I’m sure you want to put your stuff away, and your mom is going to turn blue if she stays out here in her PJ’s much longer.”