Until There Was Us

by Samantha Chase

  For a moment Megan could only stare.

  “I know it’s short notice and all, and you probably need to special-order those things in advance, but I know she’d love it!”

  “Um—”

  “Anyway, I know I’m a little late on getting the shower planned, but I think between the two of us, we can come up with something great!”

  * * *

  On Wednesday, Alex was going over his schedule for the rest of the week. It wasn’t like he needed to; he’d been working with this same list of clients for several months. But for some reason today he found himself looking at his Friday schedule and feeling…defeated.

  Danny.

  Raking a hand through his hair, Alex sighed.

  Eight years. He’d been working with Danny on his own time for eight long years, and lately doing so had been getting harder and harder. Every week Alex walked in with a smile and a positive attitude, and by the time he left, he was mentally and physically exhausted and knew he was losing hope.

  They both were.

  Growing up, Danny Mathis had been his best friend. They lived next door to one another, and not a day had gone by when they were in school when they hadn’t hung out together. They’d even picked the same college—University of Oregon. Alex always knew he would go into physical therapy, but Danny had been unsure of where he saw himself.

  It hadn’t taken long for Alex to realize that Danny was struggling at school—missing classes and partying too much—and he stepped in when he could to help him out by tutoring him and even doing some of his assignments. At the time, he thought he was helping him, but Alex realized too late that all he was doing was enabling Danny.

  Spring break of their junior year, Danny and Alex—along with several guys from their fraternity—opted to go camping and hiking. It was something they’d all enjoyed doing, and looking back now, Alex still couldn’t believe he hadn’t realized how dangerous the situation had actually been. There had been drinking, and although Alex rarely drank more than a beer or two, most of the guys spent a large part of the trip wasted.

  On their second-to-last day in the woods, they decided to try something epic—diving off one of the higher cliffs. They’d been doing it all week from the lower ones but wanted to end the week in a big way. Alex had agreed but wasn’t so sure he’d actually jump. Once they were all at the top, Danny had come up with an even bigger challenge.

  “Human pyramid!” he shouted excitedly. “And the guy at the top jumps first! It will be awesome! And then everyone dives in after him! What do you say?”

  Not everyone was on board—including Alex—but no one stopped it from happening either. As everyone talked about their position in the pyramid, Danny called the top spot, and again, no one said anything. Alex could still remember seeing Danny stumbling a little as they were setting up, and that’s when he approached him.

  “Dude, it’s ten in the morning. Please tell me you haven’t been drinking already.”

  Danny looked at him with a cocky grin. “You need to lighten up, Alex. I was a bit hungover and thought the best way to ease the pain was with another beer. Or three.” Then he laughed.

  “Danny…maybe you shouldn’t—”

  He never got to finish because everyone was already getting into position and Danny made fun of Alex for trying to be the mother hen of the group. It was an ongoing joke, and rather than fight it, Alex held his tongue.

  If there was one moment in his life he wished he could go back and change, that would be it.

  Danny dove to the left rather than the right and ended up going headfirst into shallow water. He’d broken his neck instantly. There had been nothing but chaos as the next few guys dove down, oblivious to what had happened. Alex could still hear the screaming—the panic—when someone finally realized something was wrong.

  It seemed to take forever for the paramedics to arrive and even longer to get Danny to the hospital. Critical time had been lost, and it took several days for the doctors to determine that Danny had shattered his first and second vertebrae—which meant his skull and spine were not connected. He was paralyzed from the neck down.

  Guilt ate at Alex, and he had cried more in those first days after the accident than he had in his entire life. He would sit next to Danny—who was in a medically induced coma—and beg for forgiveness. He had even gone to Danny’s parents and begged their forgiveness. They never blamed Alex; they told him how they were aware that Danny was prone to taking risks and how his behavior had gotten out of control. If anything, they blamed themselves for not stepping in and trying to help him sooner. Together they would all sit, consumed by their guilt.

  Alex had finished college the following year and was then accepted into a PT program. With every new technique he learned, he would visit Danny and try to work with him. But there was never going to be a cure for his friend. No amount of therapy was ever going to make him walk again. Over the years he’d had to overcome so many health crises, and all Alex could do was keep him moving to help alleviate issues like atrophy.

  But Danny had lost the will to live. He’d all but begged Alex to stop coming and let his body break down so he could be free from this prison, but Alex couldn’t bring himself to do that.

  Swallowing hard, Alex closed his calendar and leaned back in his chair. A shaky sigh came out just as it did every time he allowed himself to think about that day. He had to come up with a way to inspire Danny—to give him some hope. Maybe he’d see about taking him out rather than doing exercises. Once in a while they did that. It wasn’t an easy task, but the healthcare team that took care of Danny always helped him make it happen.

  With a renewed sense of spirit, Alex told himself to look forward to Friday—to have a positive attitude. He’d been doing it for years, and he knew he could do it again.

  And again and again.

  He had to.

  * * *

  The following Sunday Megan knocked on Alex’s door, practically bouncing on her toes. They were going to go to the Japanese garden today, and she had packed up a lunch for them to bring. She had casually mentioned to Summer how Alex was taking her sightseeing—as a friend—but the grin on Summer’s face told Megan she wasn’t fooling anyone. This wasn’t a casual outing with a buddy; this was turning into something more.

  Maybe Megan would talk to Summer more later on after she got home, but for now she was feeling too good to think about making excuses or explanations to anyone. For today, she was going to live in the moment and enjoy herself.

  Their trip to the park the previous Sunday had been much more enjoyable than she could have imagined. Not only was the park itself beautiful, but Alex was an amazing tour guide. He seemed to know so much about the park and answered all of her questions—and there were many—and he did it all while walking at a pace she enjoyed. Megan had a feeling if it were up to Alex, they would have been doing the tour at a faster rate—mainly because he was so athletic—but he was considerate of her, and she found she liked that about him.

  Actually, she was finding more and more just how much she liked about him.

  If she took out their history, Megan realized she would have been drawn to Alex no matter what. He had a great personality, he was funny and caring, and there wasn’t anything he wouldn’t do for his friends. They had long conversations and found they had much more in common than she’d thought they would.

  And the fact that he was incredibly good-looking didn’t hurt either.

  During the week their schedules hadn’t meshed—he started work early in the morning, and he didn’t keep regular hours. Gabriella had mentioned to her how Alex had customized the therapy schedule he’d done with Zach when he was recovering from his accident, and Megan figured that was something he did with all of his clients. While she hadn’t seen him all week, they had texted almost every day and had talked on the phone last night to confirm their plans for today. />
  “We’re still on for the Japanese garden tomorrow, right?” he had asked, his voice hopeful.

  “Absolutely! And I’m handling the food, so don’t worry about that,” she’d responded. She couldn’t wait to go to the deli and pick out the meal this time.

  And once that was covered, they’d stayed on the phone for more than an hour talking about their weeks while Megan worked on a new baby blanket for Zach and Gabriella. It felt good to multitask, and the more she crocheted, the more relaxed she became. She was appreciating her free time more and more with each passing day, and she was loving listening to Alex talk. By the time they hung up, she found herself staring at the clock and willing the time to go faster so she could see him.

  And here they were.

  Two friends hanging out, doing some sightseeing. It was actually pretty nice. Not only was she having a good time, but Alex had been great about pointing out different points of interests while they drove. Now she knew where to get the best pizza, Chinese food, and sandwiches close to home, as well as a good dry cleaner and coffee shop. She had found out more about her new neighborhood thanks to one car ride with Alex than she would have on her own. And to make sure his advice was accurate, Megan had tried all of those places this week and had been thoroughly pleased.

  If she were a more fanciful woman, she’d consider today a date. But Megan was many things, and fanciful wasn’t one of them. She was practical. Levelheaded. There was a definite difference between going for a walk in the park with a friend and a romantic day at the park with a lover. And she and Alex were definitely not—

  Wait a minute…

  Her heart rate kicked up, and she felt her cheeks flush.

  “No,” she murmured. Sure, they had kissed that weekend at Zach and Gabriella’s, but nothing even remotely inappropriate had happened since.

  Inappropriate? she thought and rolled her eyes. She was a grown woman, and Alex was definitely a grown man. Nothing they’d done could be considered wrong or…inappropriate. It was a fling, right? People had flings all the time. A sexy weekend between two consenting adults—there was nothing wrong with that. And they had tried to extend it beyond that, and…

  Okay, no more thinking about that, she chided herself. They had moved on, and even though there was still a definite attraction between the two of them, Alex was respecting her boundaries and allowing her to decide if and when she was ready to see if they could possibly explore their attraction again and…date.

  She jumped when Alex opened the door and smiled at her.

  Then her heart kicked hard for a completely different reason.

  Oh yeah, she thought. We are definitely going to explore this attraction. Soon.

  “Hey,” he said. “We ready to go?”

  Megan didn’t trust herself to speak. Taking a step back, she waited as Alex locked up and then followed him to his truck.

  “So what’s on the menu?” he asked.

  Okay, safe topic.

  “I went to the deli where you got our lunch last weekend and had them make us a couple of sandwiches. I remember you saying how much you liked their turkey clubs, so I had them make one of those for you, and I got myself a chicken salad sandwich on whole wheat.”

  “Good choice,” he said with a grin as he started the truck. “What else is in there?”

  “I brought a couple bottles of water, chips, and two giant chocolate-chip cookies.” She paused and laughed softly. “They had just come out of the oven and smelled too good to resist.”

  “No Oreos, huh?” he teased.

  She blushed at the memory. “I didn’t see any Double Stuf ones. Otherwise I would have grabbed those too.”

  Alex pulled out of the driveway and immediately began talking about the history of the Japanese garden. Megan sat back and listened to him talk. Occasionally he’d point out places they were passing that he thought she’d want to know about—the mechanic he used, a hair salon, and a day spa.

  “I have to tell you, I never thought of myself as the kind of girl to go to one of those spas, but after going for mani-pedis with Gabriella and Summer, I have a feeling I’ll be going again.”

  Alex looked over at her for a moment. “If you think that’s good, you should do the all-day thing. Besides the mani-pedi, you can get a facial and a massage. It’s supposedly very decadent, and I’m told every woman enjoys that.”

  Megan thought about it for a moment. “I’m sure it would be nice,” she said thoughtfully. “I’ve never had a facial. Or a massage.”

  “Wait…what?” he asked with disbelief. “How is that possible?”

  “I don’t know. I never thought of going for one. Or…either. I never needed a massage, and a facial seemed like a waste of time. I’ve got good skin and…” Another shrug.

  For a minute, she thought he was going to say something else, but he didn’t. They drove in silence for a bit, and then Alex went back to talking about the garden. By the time they arrived, she was even more excited about what they would see.

  After they parked and started walking, Alex took the cooler bag from Megan and reached for her hand. It seemed like the natural thing to do, so she didn’t question him. For today, she promised herself to be content and go with the flow.

  Baby steps.

  “Okay,” she said as the sign came into view, “what are we going to see first?”

  “That depends,” he said casually as they strolled along at a leisurely pace. “Was there anything you wanted to see first?”

  “Hmm…there are…what…eight different types of gardens?”

  Alex nodded.

  “I guess we’ll start with whichever one comes first,” she said, and as they walked through the entrance, she chuckled. “Or we can choose to go left, right, or straight.”

  Beside her, Alex laughed too. “Why don’t we go counterclockwise and make our way around?”

  “Sounds like a plan.”

  The paths were lushly lined, and Megan realized that no matter what she had thought they were going to see, it didn’t even compare to the reality. Never before had she seen anything so beautiful, so peaceful. This sort of place was never on her radar as something she’d want to see, and now she realized just how wrong she had been.

  As they walked, Alex pointed out the different flowers and different statues they passed, and as they approached the first garden, she found herself thoroughly enchanted by it all.

  “This is the tea garden,” Alex said softly as they turned to the right.

  Megan gasped with delight. “Oh my goodness! This is amazing! How is it possible a place like this exists in the middle of a city?”

  “It is something, isn’t it?”

  “I swear, if I had a yard of my own, I would love to do something like this. It’s like an oasis.”

  For hours they walked around, and with each new garden they encountered, she became more and more enamored with them. She had grown up in a big city and then gone to school and worked in one; things like gardens had never captured her attention. But after today’s explorations, Megan knew she was going to be doing some serious thinking about where she wanted to put down roots and what she wanted that space to look like.

  They walked the paths, enjoyed tea in the authentic tea house, and then picnicked with an amazing view of Mount Hood. Megan sighed as she took in the scenery.

  “Was that a good sigh or a bad one?” Alex asked.

  She turned her head and looked at him. “A good one. A really good one.” Pausing, Megan took a minute to appreciate the sights and the smells and the sounds all around her. It was peaceful. Tranquil. Even though there were a ton of people all around them, it didn’t feel crowded.

  “This is so different from anything I’ve ever experienced,” she explained. “And I can’t believe I’m twenty-six and just now learning to appreciate nature.”

  Beside he
r, Alex was still for a moment. “I think we all get used to the way we live and sometimes don’t realize how much else is out there to see. This is where I grew up, which made it easy to want to be outside and explore. If I grew up in a big city, chances are I’d be drawn more to going to museums and restaurants and clubs and that sort of thing.”

  Now she studied him. “Do you enjoy those things? The museums and such?”

  “Yes, there are some great museums to see around here too.” Then he shrugged. “I figured I’d introduce you to some outdoor stuff first.”

  “And I’m glad you did.” Moving a little closer, Megan rested her head on Alex’s shoulder, and for a few minutes, they were both content to stay that way. “What are you thinking for next weekend?” When Alex didn’t answer right away, she wanted to kick herself. Maybe he had other plans or didn’t plan on being her permanent tour guide. She was about to correct herself when he spoke.

  “How about the Portland Audubon Society? There are some great walking trails, and we can go bird-watching. How does that sound?”

  “Bird-watching?” she asked with amusement as she lifted her head. “Seriously? That’s a thing people do?”

  Looking at her, he smiled, and everything in Megan simply melted. To her, there could never be a more perfect moment than this one—their day had been amazing, their lunch was delicious. And the smile on this man and the sheer happiness she saw there…it was everything. Before she could second-guess herself, she leaned in and gently pressed her lips to his.

  If Alex had been surprised, he didn’t let on—but he also didn’t immediately respond or take control. He let her kiss him—gently. Softly. Once. Twice. And then? Then they both sort of eased into it, sighing with pleasure as if this was what they’d been waiting for all day. It was slow and sweet, and Megan felt herself melt against him as his arms slowly banded around her. She remembered their first kiss had been in a garden, but at the time she hadn’t paid any attention to that detail because her focus had solely been on Alex. And their first kiss had been all heat and need. It was the total opposite of this, and yet it felt the same. She already knew she was falling for him. Again. And with even the slightest encouragement, she’d be willing to get in the car right now and drive home and have another wild weekend of sex with him. Only…