Girl Power Omnibus (Gender Swap Superhero Fiction)

by P. T. Dilloway

  As she closes in on the ship, she shakes her IR vision on. She can see Geiger’s rotund body at the front of the craft, probably in the cockpit. Has he got any surprises in there for her? A gamma radiation grenade perhaps? He has used similar tricks in the past.

  She comes up with an easy solution to defeat any booby traps he might have on board. She dives beneath the ship until she’s near the tops of the waves. Then, after again batting hair from her face, she changes direction to head straight up. She picks up enough speed that it’s easy enough for her to tear right through the bottom of the ship.

  Her estimates were right, as she tears beneath Geiger’s chair. He screams as she yanks the seat out through the hole. The ship begins to fall away from them while Starla tosses Geiger’s chair into the ocean. She holds him at bay with one hand on the front collar of his shirt.

  “What were you up to this time, Geiger?” she asks. “Were you going to use radioactive bees to irradiate the people?”

  Geiger’s mouth moves but no words come out. His eyes bulge and his red face begins to drip with sweat. When she glances down between his legs, she sees the explanation for this reaction. It’s tempting to drop the pervert into the ocean, but she carries him back to land, where police are waiting for him.

  She hopes to drop Geiger and leave, but Kate King is already there, Billy at her side, snapping away. “Excuse me, ma’am, Kate King of the Atomic City Star. Would you mind if I ask a few questions?”

  “I really don’t have time,” Starla says. “There are more people who need me.”

  She starts to fly away, but she feels heavier. With a start she sees Kate clinging to her left boot; Kate never was one to let go of a story easily. Since they’re already a hundred feet off the ground, Starla can’t just shake Kate away without hurting her.

  Instead, she drifts over to the rooftop of an old apartment building. Kate refuses to let go until Starla lands. “That wasn’t very smart,” Starla chides her. “You could have been killed.”

  “I wasn’t about to miss this story. A female superhero! It’s unbelievable.”

  “Not that unbelievable,” Starla says tartly. She could try to escape now, but there’s no guarantee Kate wouldn’t manage to grab her boot or cape before she did. “I really don’t have time for an interview right now. If you’ll excuse me—”

  “Hold on. This is big news. Not just because you’re a woman either. No one has seen or heard from Apex Man in weeks and now here you are, with all the same powers and pretty much the same costume. You’ve even got the same color hair!”

  “What are you saying?”

  “Well, did Apex Man decide to go off and get a sex change? Were you always a woman trapped in a man’s body?”

  “That’s ridiculous. I’m not Apex Man. I’m…his cousin.”

  “His cousin? I thought everyone on his home planet was killed?”

  With her wholesome farm upbringing, Starla’s never been much of a liar, but the mention of her home planet gives her an idea for a cover story that should make Major Dalton proud. “I was lost in space from before my planet died. I was in a cryochamber, drifting along. I finally ended up in your solar system, where my cousin found me. He took me to your planet and helped me adjust to my new abilities. He even made me a costume like his own.”

  “So where is he?”

  “He left. He went to look for more ships, in case there are any others like me. He told me to fill in for him until he gets back.”

  Kate scribbles down notes furiously on a notepad; she insists on still using the low-tech method. “That’s quite a story. So what are we supposed to call you? Apex Woman?”

  “That’s fine with me,” Starla says.

  “I suppose you won’t let me see beneath the mask either, right?”

  “My cousin said it’s best not to. It could be dangerous for me.”

  “Right. Well, look, maybe you have some questions about Earth? It has to be confusing to you after living on another planet and drifting in space for so long.”

  Starla knows what Kate’s trying to do. She wants to draw Starla in, to make her a confidante so she can get more exclusive dirt on Apex Woman. It’s the same thing any dedicated journalist would do in order to get the best story. “Perhaps another time,” Starla says. “I really have to go.”

  “Sure. Take my card. If you have somewhere to put it under there.”

  Sarla’s cheeks warm as she takes Kate’s card. Kate is right that there isn’t anywhere to put it except perhaps between her breasts. She opts to tuck it inside her boot. “Thank you. We’ll talk again soon.”

  As Starla lifts off, she doesn’t know why she said the last part.

  Chapter 12

  The guards open the door and then shove Midnight inside. She doesn’t run to her bed to flop on it like a pouting kid. Instead, she drops to the floor to do some push-ups. Or at least one push-up. She’s barely managed to lift herself off the floor when Jasper says, “What are you doing?”

  “Exactly what it looks like.” She groans as she struggles to push herself up as high as her arms can stretch. She holds it there for a moment before she collapses onto the floor.

  “I think there might be exercises better suited to your new body. Aerobics perhaps. Or that Brazilian stuff that’s all the rage—”

  “Zumba? Are you serious?” She rolls over onto her side to glare at him. “I’ve been trained by the foremost masters of the martial arts in the world. I’m not doing fucking Zumba.”

  “Such language isn’t really appropriate for a girl your age, Mistress Robin.”

  “You’re loving this, aren’t you? Your little birdie’s flown back into the nest. It’s a freaking dream come true for you.”

  “Don’t be absurd. I never wanted anything like this to happen to you. Now, would you care to tell me what has really got the bee in your bonnet?”

  “It’s none of your business.”

  “Does it have something to do with those burly gentlemen who showed you in here? Were you sticking your nose where it didn’t belong?”

  Midnights sighs and sits up. She stares down at her tiny feet in their scuffed sneakers. “Major Dalton grounded me, I guess you could say. She’ll probably make me go to bed without supper now too.”

  “Why ever would she do such a thing?”

  “Because she thinks I’m useless. Just like everyone else.” Midnight screams with rage as tears start to come. She throws herself back to the floor to attempt another push-up. As her puny muscles attempt to lift her up, she explains to Jasper about the threats in Pacifica, Focal City, and Atomic City. “She let all of them go, but I have to stay here.”

  “That seems like a wise idea. A girl who can’t do one push-up isn’t going to be much use in a fight with those blokes.”

  “She offered to let me use one of the computer terminals. Like she really needs me to tap a few keys like those drones in the command center.”

  “Perhaps she was trying to spare your feelings.”

  “I’m sure.” With another groan Midnight pushes herself up. This time she manages to drop to the floor in a more graceful fashion. “I don’t need her to spare my feelings. I need her to let me do my freaking job!”

  “Do you really think that’s a good idea?”

  “I didn’t put all those assholes in jail because I was bigger and stronger than them, or even because I had better toys. I did it because I was smarter than them. I knew how to use my skills to their best advantage. Turning into a girl didn’t change that.”

  “That’s an interesting theory.”

  “It’s not a theory! It’s a motherfucking fact! You’ll see. You’ll all see when I get out of here.”

  Midnight continues her slow push-ups until she’s too spent to go on. Jasper rushes to her side. She’s too weak to fight him off as he scoops her up. For an old man, Jasper manages to carry her as if she weighs nothing. He drops her on the bed and then proceeds to start tucking her in the way he did when she was a little boy.


  “I don’t need you to do this,” Midnight says. “I can take care of myself.”

  “I’ve known that for a long time, Mistress Robin.” He smiles at her. “I do it anyway.”

  “Thanks,” she says. She manages the strength to sit up and hug him. He eases her back onto the bed and then turns out the light. She hears the chair next to the bed creak before she falls asleep.

  ***

  She wakes to a voice growling something, followed by Jasper whispering, “I’m sorry, but Mistress Robin is sleeping right now.”

  “I don’t give a good goddamned what she’s doing. Get her out here in two minutes or I’ll have these gentlemen come in to take her.”

  Midnight sits up in bed. She gropes around until she finds the switch for the reading lamp attached to the headboard. “What’s going on?” she asks.

  “We’re having a briefing in the lounge in five minutes,” Dalton says.

  “I’ll be right there.” Midnight throws back the blankets and realizes Jasper took off her shoes. She finds them on the floor beneath the bed. After she slips into them, she hurries to catch up with Dalton and her goons. Jasper falls in behind her.

  “Are you sure you want to do this? I could make you a cup of tea—”

  “Good, go make some tea. Bring it into the lounge,” Midnight snaps. She doesn’t like to be so rude to Jasper, who’s been like a father to her, but she can’t let him baby her. Even if she’s a young girl on the outside, she’s still a grown man on the inside.

  She finds Allison and Starla in the lounge, but not Elise. Did something happen to that prissy bitch? Despite their differences, especially since their run-in with the Feminazi, Midnight hopes not. Allison and Starla are still clad in their ridiculous outfits; Allison cries quietly into an olive drab handkerchief one of the grunts must have given to her.

  Dalton reaches into one pocket for a printout. It’s the main screen of the Atomic City Star’s blog. A headline proclaims: Meet Apex Girl! This is followed by the subheader: Female Superhero Picks Up Where Cousin Left Off. Dalton turns to Starla. “What the hell were you thinking? You were supposed to take care of Geiger and get your ass back here quietly, not pose for pictures and do a goddamned interview!”

  “I’m sorry. Kate is very tenacious,” Starla mumbles. “She didn’t leave me much choice.”

  “You could have flown away.”

  “They’d still have pictures. And then Kate King and everyone else would be making up her own story,” Midnight says. “You should be glad Starla got out in front of it.”

  “I don’t need crisis control tips from you, young lady,” Dalton snaps.

  “Leave Robin alone. She didn’t do anything,” Starla says. Her eyes glow for a moment before she shakes her head. “I’m sorry, Major. I wasn’t thinking clearly at the time. It’s been so long since I’ve seen Kate—”

  Starla begins to blubber too. Midnight shakes her head with disgust. “So what happened to Elise?”

  “We haven’t been able to raise her. I have someone en route to contact her.”

  “So why did you bring us here? I thought this was supposed to be a briefing.”

  “It is. I’ve got new orders. We’re going to be releasing you soon.”

  Starla and Allison look up from their blubbering. “We can go home?” Allison asks.

  “That’s what the briefing is about. I already gave you all new identities. You will be expected to maintain those identities once you’re released. This means no contact with your families or other people you cared about before. We can’t risk anyone else finding out what happened to you four.”

  “Else? What’s that supposed to mean?” Midnight asks.

  Allison’s cheeks turn red. “I accidentally let it slip to Inertia when I captured her. But she’s not going to be able to tell anyone, is she?”

  “Let’s hope not,” Dalton says. “Now, Starla and Allison, you’ll be provided with new apartments and cover jobs. Think of this like witness protection. You’re getting a whole new lease on life. Understand?”

  Starla and Allison nod. Midnight asks, “What about me?”

  “You can go home with Jasper. The Justice Department has already worked up the papers to name you Jasper’s ward. He’ll have complete control of your assets until you turn eighteen.”

  “What’s he supposed to tell the board?”

  “We’ve already got it worked out in the packet I gave you. Didn’t you bother to study it?” When Midnight only shrugs, Dalton says, “Rob Holloway has decided to drop off the grid and go live with some monks in Nepal to find inner peace. You are the illegitimate daughter he didn’t know about before he left. Your mother is dead and you tracked down your birth father and now Jasper is looking after you. Got it?”

  “That’ll never work,” Midnight says.

  “It should work fine as long as no one goes poking holes in it. And why should they? Everyone knows Rob Holloway is a womanizing flake, don’t they? You gave us a lot of help already in selling this story.”

  “I guess,” Midnight mutters.

  “On top of your new civilian identities, Allison and Starla, you’ll have your new superhero identities too. Obviously Starla’s already established hers. Provided Elise makes it back here without incident, we’ll have a press conference in two days to reveal the new, female Super Squad featuring Apex Girl, Velocity Gal, and the Mermaid.”

  “Velocity Gal? I’m not some kid sidekick,” Allison grumbles.

  “Sorry, but Starla already established the pattern.”

  “I told Kate it was Apex Woman. Larry probably made her change it. He’s always been stuck in the past.”

  “Or maybe your girlfriend changed it,” Midnight teases.

  “That’s not funny,” Starla snaps.

  Before an argument can start up, Dalton says, “The three of you are going to do a little goodwill tour across the globe. We’re already setting it up with the UN. We want to make sure you gals are highly visible to deter any more attacks like those Allison and Starla thwarted.”

  “Don’t you think someone will eventually put it together that they look almost exactly like female versions of the old Super Squad?” Midnight asks. “Maybe you should let Cash dye their hair too.”

  “It’s too late for that. We’ll have to hope people are too grateful their lives are being saved to worry about it.” Dalton sighs and then tosses the blog printout away. “This isn’t how I wanted it to go. I would have preferred to keep you here until we could find a way to change you back. Or at least have better covers worked out. But it’s not up to me, so we’ll have to make do and hope for the best.”

  Allison raises her hand as though they’re in school. “What are you going to tell my wife about why I’m gone so long? She won’t believe I abandoned her and Jenny to live with some monks in Nepal.”

  “This may be hard for you and Starla to accept, but we’ll have to arrange for your male identities to die in ‘accidents.’ The attack on T.U.R.B.O. Labs was fortunate in one way. We can say you died along with the others. As for Starla, well, the CIA will arrange for Stan Shaw to be in the wrong place at the wrong time.”

  “The Pentagon, Justice Department, and CIA are all in on this? How do you expect to keep anything secret?” Midnight asks.

  “They’re only working on a need-to-know basis. The only ones who know everything are us and a select few higher-ups. We’ve even kept the president in the dark about it.”

  “So much for the Commander-in-Chief,” Midnight grumbles.

  Dalton claps her hands. “All right, ladies, I know this will be a rough transition for you. Rougher than it has already been. We’re going to have a counselor on hand should you need one. And if you need any help with your wardrobes or decorating your apartments or whatnot, Ms. Cash is still on call. Like I said, though, you should see this as a fresh start. It’s a second chance for all of you. Not many people get that.”

  “Lucky us,” Midnight mutters.

  “But I was hap
py before!” Allison shouts. She has to wipe furiously at her eyes with the handkerchief. “I don’t want a new life. I want my old one back.”

  “Then you’ll have to find a way to change yourself back,” Dalton says. “We’re going to put you up in a lab at Grant Laboratories with all the help you need. That’s your cover job.”

  “What about me?” Starla asks. “What am I supposed to do?”

  “We’ve got a nice office job for you. I’ll give you the details later. Right now, I want you to go back to your rooms, change, and get some rest. You’ve done good work today saving the world. Be proud of yourselves.”

  Midnight crosses her arms, knowing this is meant for only Starla and Allison. Midnight didn’t do anything except a few measly push-ups in her room before she took a nap. She’s the first to bolt from the lounge, back to her room. She finds Jasper there with two cups of tea. He smiles at her. “I’m afraid they wouldn’t let me in the room with you,” he says. “How did it go?”

  Midnight glares at him. “You knew they were naming you my legal guardian, didn’t you?”

  “That was one of the reasons they brought me here.”

  “Why didn’t you tell me?”

  “I wasn’t quite sure how without upsetting you even more.”

  “Well, don’t get too comfortable with it. A year and I’ll be back in charge of everything.”

  “Yes, of course. I’ll try not to bring the Holloway empire down during my brief reign.”

  “Smart ass,” Midnight says. She fetches the packet Dalton had given to her days ago and starts to read through it, to acquaint herself with her new life.

  Chapter 13

  Midnight watches the press conference while she jogs on the treadmill in the bunker’s gym. What a farce, she thinks as she watches Apex Girl bend a machine gun like a pretzel. She cocks one arm back and then hurls it towards Oakland. Velocity Gal speeds away to catch the gun and race back to the conference like the world’s fastest golden retriever.

  Major Dalton and the Pentagon brass decided to locate the press conference in San Francisco so they could be close to water. This allows the Mermaid to summon a pair of humpback whales into the harbor. She waves to the crowd from atop one whale like it’s a parade float. Instead of throwing candy, the Mermaid throws kisses to the throng of media simpletons.