Bending The Universe

by Justin Wetch

  But now I join the song your galaxy sings

  I’m falling freely into your orbit.

  WHAT I FELL IN LOVE WITH

  I fell in love

  With the edges of your lips

  With your scratchy morning voice

  And the detail in your fingertips

  I fell in love

  With your silly shy smile

  With your hair in the sun

  And your summery sense of style

  You brought me to places

  I’d have never thought to go

  To a trail near the river

  Where the water runs slow;

  To a mountain where all we heard

  Was our voices’ echo;

  You showed me inward beauty

  That doesn’t show in photos.

  I fell in love

  With more than I could need

  With a deep soul

  And a face I couldn’t leave;

  I fell in love—

  If I may tell it true;

  I fell in love

  With every piece of you.

  SOMEONE ELSE

  I walked up to your door

  With roses in hand

  Ready to ask

  If your heart would be mine;

  Might we grow together

  In the sunlight of love

  Like two oak trees

  Standing strong

  Against weather and change?

  But when I came to your door

  Pausing to check again

  My appearance

  In my reflection

  In your window

  I froze

  Like a blue jay

  Who has forgotten

  To migrate south

  For the winter.

  In each others arms:

  The girl I loved

  And another man.

  The wistful gazes

  The romantic dances

  The rain kisses

  The contented smiles

  Everything I wanted

  You gave

  To someone else.

  I dropped the roses

  Trampling them

  As you did

  Our blooming flower;

  I left angrily

  Without a second glance.

  Oh, the pain of reality

  I cannot stop loving you

  But you’ve given your heart

  To someone else.

  Oh, how it destroys me

  This simple revelation:

  You’ve given your heart

  To someone else.

  TO LOVE IS TO LIE

  Love is just two people

  Plastering perfect masks

  On each others’ faces;

  And it only lasts

  Until the masks crack

  And the fantasy ends.

  Promises of forever

  Resonate for seconds

  And die with the echo;

  Sweet words sprout

  But decay with the seasons

  Like saccharine fruit.

  To love is to lie

  Sweetly, then bitterly

  Further down the road;

  As the knife is pulled out,

  Leaving the heart as empty

  As it was to begin with.

  The most pathetic of lies

  Are the ones we tell ourselves,

  Desperately clinging to hope;

  Namely, that passion

  Is more than an illusion, and

  Love is more than a lie.

  TO LOVE IS TO LIVE

  Love starts as a feeling,

  But to continue is a choice;

  And I find myself choosing you

  More and more every day.

  Like two flowers

  Which begin from separate roots

  But entangle and grow as one

  We are stronger together.

  You make me feel

  Like I deserve the world

  Even though I have nothing to give

  But love and laughter.

  When I look into your eyes

  It’s so easy to forget

  What it was like

  To stare into life’s darkness

  When I listen to your laugh

  It’s so easy to forget

  Every pessimistic word I ever said

  About love and romance.

  REACHING ACROSS THE DISTANCE

  I’d die before talking to you again.

  No, I mean

  I would have to be dying

  Before I could muster the courage

  To reach out to you

  Like a bridge across an ocean

  Between two far away continents

  Reaching across the distance

  Like a candle

  Hoping to illuminate

  A universe of darkness.

  Once again I’ve put your number

  Into my phone

  And all that is left

  Is for me to press

  The call button,

  And just like that

  This needle would drop

  Into our austere silence

  Like a gunshot

  Fired

  Into a hushed abyss.

  But for the thousandth time

  I clear it away

  Like a flamethrower

  Declaring this chance

  Of rebuilt bridges

  To be so much kindling

  Just more fuel

  Sacrificed at the altar

  Of chance

  And possibility.

  Are we like two stars in a constellation

  Seeming so close

  And making so much sense

  Yet in reality

  We are separated by lightyears

  And shall never meet?

  Except, perhaps

  In that sacred space

  Between dreams and reality

  Called hope.

  PARAPHERNALIA

  With shaky hands I adjust

  The instrument of my addiction

  I breathe in, in, in

  Eyes fluttering as

  The waves of pleasure hit.

  My brain sloshes to mush

  Hands finally become steady

  I see my exhale in the moonlit air

  Rolling my head back

  In pure release.

  You are my drug of choice

  I know you’re no good for me

  And though I swear my lips

  Will never touch you again

  Here we are, here we are.

  Your whispers, like electricity

  Flirt with the edges

  Of the neurons in my brain

  Taking captive my will

  Into a vortex of your smile.

  Passion drips in the humid air

  Like moonlight peeking through

  The gaps in the arms of oak trees;

  Flittering a monochrome painting

  Onto the soft, leaf-ridden floor.

  The music stops and the dance dies

  Your chemical abandons my brain

  And I hold my head in my hands

  Regretting, as I do every time

  That I have succumbed to your siren song.

  As we lay next to one another

  I stare into your tresses of hair

  And imagine that I could twist them

  Into a hangman’s noose

  And end this cycle forever.

  But that thought passes quickly

  And I escape through the cracked window

  Swearing you off for the thousandth time

  But still knowing, deep down inside

  I am addicted to your essence.

  FOREVER

  You see flaws in every face

  If you look long enough.

  That’s why I’m so afraid

  Of the word ‘forever’.

  Forever is long enough

  For sunrises to become stale

  For fire t
o become tame

  For a favorite song

  To become like nails

  On a chalkboard;

  Forever is long enough

  For passion to waste away

  Like grapes into raisins

  Under the beating sun

  Of countless days.

  Every promise of ‘forever’

  Brings with it a tainted air,

  A perfume of dishonesty

  Reeking of roses wilting

  For even beauty has limits

  And its seasons.

  I don’t want to look

  —Some day in the future—

  Into familiar irises

  And find handcuffs

  Where I used to see stars.

  So I won’t take forever

  For granted.

  Let us love like the spark

  Between flint and stone

  In reckless abandonment,

  Promising no eternities,

  But promising only to seek out

  Upon each day’s sunrise

  Something to choose to love

  In each other.

  MUSE

  Blood becomes less blood

  Sky becomes less light

  Ash becomes oxygen

  Mind becomes a metropolis

  Where the streets are named after you.

  I get lost on these streets

  Like I do in your eyes

  The back of my hand is lost

  To memory in your mind

  Be careful not to fall from

  On my mind with heels that high;

  Brain turns to mush

  Tongue turns to a tie

  Eyes turn to beacons

  Lips turn to ships

  Which find each other in this darkness.

  In a moment you’re my muse

  My Aphrodite, a greek sculpture

  Your arms might not be heaven

  But they’re sure as hell closer

  Than here, but like purgatory

  Bliss doesn’t come without torture;

  Two became one

  But then one became two

  Embrace becomes a standoff

  Eden becomes Earth

  And perfect unity falls out of sync.

  I used to paint my muse from up close

  Now I can only admire you from afar

  I used to drink from Pirene

  Now I pick poison from a bar

  My muse, my muse, how did we fall

  From what we were to what we are?

  THE HEART COLLECTOR

  I'd be lying if I said I didn't want you

  I'd be lying if I said I didn't wish you were mine

  The truth is, you stole my heart from afar

  The truth is, you still have it.

  You took a piece of me when you left

  I had cupid's arrow straight to the heart

  When you pulled it out without a care

  I said I loved you as I bled out.

  Your eyes could make the brightest

  Of the brightest diamonds jealous

  And your lovely smile

  Could melt the hearts of the cold.

  I held my arms open to you

  I wanted badly your embrace

  But you walked on past without a care

  As I stood in the wind, alone.

  I stood with that pose for a thousand years

  I stood, waiting for two to be one

  But never did you deign to glance my way.

  I froze when fall turned to winter.

  A statue, standing against the snow

  A monument against what love is

  I watched couples walk by on the street

  And glance suspiciously at their lovers.

  Then spring came at last and I

  Finally melted, finally became free

  I fell to a fetal pose and laid

  There for the whole summer.

  I saw you walking past as I lay

  There, thinking over my life

  A new man at your shoulder.

  You pushed him up against a tree

  And added another arrow to your collection.

  I watched as he fell the the ground

  I watched as he tried to rise again;

  I realized you were addicted to this art

  I realized this was your one true passion.

  You had no love for the hearts you stole

  You only loved the moment of leaving.

  I'd be lying if I said I didn't want you

  I'd be lying if I said I didn't wish you were mine

  The truth is, you stole my heart from afar

  The truth is, I finally took it back.

  HIGH ON YOUR PERFUME

  Call me obsessed, color me consumed

  I’ve always been the type to notice

  The smell of a rose in bloom,

  But let me confess, this is new

  You’ve stopped my heart, let it resume

  And I, to finish, must tell it true

  I’m high on your perfume.

  Like a mouse tempted to cheese

  An elixir of life that must be tasted

  I toss away all fear and unease

  And oh, the risk that the trap will spring,

  I breathe it in deeply like an autumn breeze;

  You locked my attention on yourself,

  Took it all; and threw away the keys.

  Breathe in, in, in, can’t get enough;

  Excuse me if I linger a second longer...

  Eyes gloss over with a whiff of lust,

  You bite your lip, I can’t resist;

  We close our eyes, we do, we must;

  Now that I’ve tasted who you are

  I’m addicted, I can’t get enough.

  EYES OF THE WILDEST TEMPESTS

  There is a woman of exceeding beauty

  Whose occasional bouts of temper

  Can best be likened

  To the wrath of God.

  When cosmic irises transform

  Into the eyes of the wildest tempests

  When meteor showers in the heavenly bodies

  Cascade into a devilish hellfire

  Do not even look upon the result

  Lest you be turned into a pillar of salt.

  She cries when she is angry;

  Is it not odd how that act

  Can be either a gentle rain

  Upon remarking colossal art

  Or a torrential righteous flood

  Vowing to drown the Earth in fury?

  But after the storm calms

  And the scorched earth has regrown,

  Old testament fire

  Turns to new testament wine

  And past sins have been forgiven.

  A FOOL’S ODE TO HIS LOVE

  I cannot help but say

  That I have fallen in love with you.

  Perhaps it was your voice,

  Whispers which hinted of music;

  Or the way your eyes sparkled

  When you spoke of passion;

  Of my endearment to you,

  I am witless of the origin.

  I found a night’s sky full of stars

  In your cinematic eyes

  And heard a symphony

  In your laughter.

  Your lips are like a cherry

  Begging to be tasted

  And to caress your face

  Is to feel sunlight.

  You are a ray of sunshine

  In this dark world;

  While the day is young

  I must suntan.

  LOVE & LOGIC

  In math and science, we learn everything has a reason

  It’s physics, it’s gravity, it’s a reaction going to completion

  But I cannot divine, cannot figure out one thing

  The reasons behind love; surely it must be something!

  There are others with pretty eyes, but I like yours best

  But why? Perhaps just because they reflect

  Th
e moon and stars with such timeless ferocity

  Or our own hearts in orbit with increasing velocity

  There are seven billion faces smiling in as many ways

  But if I don’t see yours, I consider it a wasted day.

  What is it about you that’s so irreplaceable?

  You’re an original masterpiece, the signature unmistakeable.

  In love, it seems every heart has it’s own locked door

  And each of us has a key, but we know not which one it’s for

  Perhaps that explains the feeling I feel about you;

  Perhaps that is why it is so impossible to subdue

  My relentless adoration for the person I see

  Even though the reasons are buried in my psyche

  But maybe love doesn’t need reasons or a list sorted,

  Maybe it is what it is, and the reasons why aren’t important.

  ANESTHETIC

  Mind blurred by the painkiller I was on

  Didn’t even realize open heart surgery was happening

  But suddenly I’ve snapped to awareness

  And now I feel everything.

  You were the anesthetic

  That dulled life’s pain

  But you left a void in my consciousness

  And now nothing’s the same.

  Pulse has gone to a flat line

  I’m screaming but no one hears me

  Vision fades to black on black on black

  Mental burns to the third degree.

  Everything's vivid and burning

  Bereft of the dullness that kept me

  My anesthetic has worn off

  Your place in my mind is empty.

  WRITE YOUR NAME

  I came up with a new reason

  To write your name today

  I plagiarized each letter

  From a love note you wrote me.

  The scent of ink was sacred to me

  In that relapsed moment…

  For a minute I could pretend

  The paper reminded me of your skin;

  I could pretend the glimmering ink

  Was the moonlit lake

  Of our summer night.

  But the pretending crumpled with paper

  And I threw us into the trash can

  For the bridge between us is long burned

  And it’s time I accepted that.

  COLORS

  I used to see a sunset

  And marvel at it’s beauty

  The sight of the sun dancing down

  Was enough for me.

  I used to sigh with contentment

  At the taste of a fresh grape

  And smile at the colorful leaves

  On the ground, with their many shapes.

  But then I looked into your eyes

  And I was colorblind no more

  With the perspective you gave me

  Your voice became my life’s musical score.