His Love Endures Forever

by Beth Wiseman

  Uh, no, my son, you’re most definitely not. “I must go.”

  “Don’t you want to see the rest of the haus?” Levi stepped forward, still holding Danielle’s hand.

  “I will see it another day.” She moved toward the door, knowing her son expected her to say or do something, but she simply waved as she hurried toward her buggy.

  It was everything she could do to hold her tears until she’d made her way out of the driveway.

  “SHE HATES ME.” Danielle watched from the window as Vera turned the corner in her buggy.

  Levi came up behind her and put his arms around her waist, which felt strangely familiar, but weird at the same time. “She doesn’t hate you. It’s just going to take her some time to get used to the idea of us together. Forever.”

  Danielle twisted to face him. “Do you really think she will come around? Because I don’t. She will always see me as the girl who pulled you from your Amish roots.”

  He kissed her on the nose. “She will grow to know you and love you like I do.”

  Danielle sighed. “I don’t know about that.” She nudged him playfully when she heard his stomach growling. “I bet you’re going to miss your mother’s cooking, especially the homemade bread. Katie Ann would bring us bread, and it was always so good.”

  Levi smiled. “Well, uh . . . maybe you could make bread for us?”

  Danielle chuckled. “I can make a mean piece of toast. But I’ve told you, I don’t really know how to cook anything that doesn’t come out of a box with specific instructions.” She poked him on the arm. “And Martha said it’s hard to make bread. She grew up watching her grandmother do it. You have to smash it over and over again, let it rise, then smash it some more.”

  “I think you mean knead. You knead the bread.” Levi licked his upper lip. “If there was one thing I could have every day from my parents’ house . . . it would be Mamm’s bread.”

  Danielle watched him, thinking, Someday I’m going to make him a loaf of bread that will make him forget about his mother’s.

  VERA TRUDGED UP her porch steps with the weight of the wedding news causing her to feel two inches shorter. She reached a hand to her left shoulder blade and rubbed before she opened the door.

  After crossing through the living room, she found Elam in the kitchen with Betsy, each eating a piece of shoofly pie. She waited until Betsy had taken her last bite before asking her young daughter to go play upstairs.

  “They did it.” Vera slid into a chair at the table, propped her elbows on it, and covered her face with her hands. “Levi and Danielle got married late yesterday afternoon. Danielle was there when I arrived.” She clenched her jaw to kill the sob in her throat, then looked up to gauge Elam’s reaction. He finished chewing a bite of pie and sat back against his chair as his brows lowered. Vera held her breath as she waited for any words of comfort her husband might share.

  Elam pushed his plate forward on the table, then stroked his beard. “Vera . . .”

  She let out the breath she was holding and folded her hands on the table. Elam was about to tell her that she had to accept this marriage. She knew him well enough to know his thoughts. She tapped a finger on the table and waited.

  “This isn’t what either of us wanted, mei lieb, but if you want to have a relationship with your sohn, you’re going to have to find some way to make peace with this. God is in control. Not us. If Levi felt called to marry Danielle, then who are we to question it?”

  Vera couldn’t bear the thought of not having Levi as a part of their lives, but she couldn’t shake the feeling that Danielle had tricked him somehow. Pushed him into a corner. Until he believed it was God telling him to marry her.

  “It’s not right for you to practice your own personal shunning, Vera, when the boy hasn’t been baptized. We’ve always known this was a possibility with any of our kinner.”

  Maybe Elam had thought it was a possibility, but Vera never had. It was a distant fear, but never a real possibility. She remained quiet, blinking back tears as she drummed her fingers on the table.

  “I suggest you get to know this girl. Whether you like it or not, she is now the number one person in Levi’s life, after God.” Elam pushed back his chair and carried his plate to the sink. He turned to face her, leaning against the counter. His eyes warmed, a slight smile on his face. “You will do the right thing.” He walked to her, leaned down, and kissed her on the cheek.

  Fourteen

  DANIELLE PULLED BOTH LOAVES OF BREAD FROM the oven, slammed them down on the top of the stove, and stared at the mounds that had refused to rise—for the third time.

  Today was Sisters Day, and Levi had been insistent that Danielle accept the invitation from his sister Emily, who was hosting it at her home, so Danielle had taken the day off from work. Danielle had been around the Amish long enough to know that a Sisters Day was a monthly gathering when all the women got together to do quilting, canning, or some other sort of project. Sometimes they cleaned house for an elderly person or shut-in. Everyone brought food. Danielle had known not to count on bringing bread following her first two failed attempts, so she’d bought some cookies from the grocery store the day before.

  She dreaded going to the event, and the only saving factor was that it was being held at Emily and David’s house. Her sister-in-law and her husband had always been kind to her, and when Emily showed up and asked Danielle to come, Danielle knew she wouldn’t be able to get out of it.

  It had been over two weeks since their wedding, and she and Levi weren’t living any more like husband and wife than when they first got married. They’d moved from the floor in front of the fireplace and to the bed on the second night, but there wasn’t anything physical going on. Twice she’d tried to initiate more than just a few kisses with Levi, and both times he’d said he was tired. Danielle wondered if maybe Levi wasn’t attracted to her. She reached down and touched her belly, knowing it protruded a little more than she’d like. She wasn’t even four months pregnant yet, but the way she’d been eating lately, the pounds were coming on quickly.

  They hadn’t gone to the Amish worship service yesterday because Danielle had been sick to her stomach. She’d told Levi to go without her, but he’d insisted on staying home with her. Danielle figured Levi might be nervous to face his family, even though Danielle knew that he’d always be welcomed at church. Either way, she’d been relieved to get out of it herself.

  She dumped the loaves of bread into the garbage. Again. Levi had left for work hours ago. He never said anything about her not getting up to make him breakfast, even though she knew that Amish women did that . . . rising at four or four thirty to send their men off with a full stomach. Best she’d likely ever be able to do for Levi would be to pour him a bowl of cereal, and she doubted he needed her to do that. She’d been working the afternoon shift, but her hours had been cut. Both she and Sue suspected a layoff was coming. Business had declined since the new owners took over a few months ago and changed the menu.

  She looked around her simple kitchen. Levi had purchased a small oak kitchen table with four chairs, promising to get a bigger one when they could afford it. They hardly had any furniture—two rockers in the living room and a queen-size bed in their bedroom. She wondered how they would afford all the things necessary for a baby. Thankfully, Martha would make sure the baby had everything he or she needed. She’d said so plenty of times. Levi was insistent that Danielle keep her little bit of savings for now, something in case of an emergency.

  Her surrogate mother had been by to visit daily, sometimes alone, sometimes with Arnold. Danielle tried to make excuses for the condition of the place. In addition to the rundown state of the house, Danielle knew she wasn’t the best at cleaning. Martha had eyed their sink full of dishes several times when she’d visited. But it just seemed easier to let them all stack up and do them when the sink was full. There was no dishwasher, so she had to fill the sink up with soapy water and do them all by hand. Plus, Danielle had been working in the af
ternoons and by the time she got back, she was tired.

  She glanced at the clock on the wall in the kitchen, took a deep breath, and went to get dressed for the event. After she put on the most conservative thing she owned—her knee-length navy skirt, pullover white blouse, and tennis shoes—her heart pounded, wishing there was some way to get out of going. But Emily had been so sweet when she came to invite her, and Danielle suspected Katie Ann and Lillian would be there—and she really liked both of them.

  It was Vera and Sarah she was mostly worried about.

  She wound her hair into a loose side braid, something she’d been doing most of the time, since she didn’t have electricity to use her flatiron. She’d gotten used to using lanterns in the evening, and even found it a bit cozy—and romantic—even though romance didn’t seem to have a big claim on their lives at the moment. Levi had even stopped kissing her with the passion of their wedding night. It was hard not to be depressed, and there wasn’t even a television or radio to take her mind off things. So she’d tried bread making a few times and played games on her cell phone in the mornings until time for work. When Martha came to visit, Danielle took advantage of that time to charge her cell phone in Martha’s car.

  She’d also found a new love of pickled okra, something she didn’t even like before she was pregnant. Now she went to the market every other day for a new jar.

  She picked up her box of cookies to take to Sisters Day, found her purse and keys, and made herself walk out the door. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad.

  SARAH PULLED UP at Emily’s house at the same time as Vera and Betsy. No matter how things had transpired, Sarah respected the sacrament of marriage enough not to do anything more to try to cause problems between Levi and Danielle. She had no choice but to go on with her life. But her stomach churned at the thought of having to be around the girl at all.

  Sarah forced a bright smile to her face and climbed out of the buggy as Vera and Betsy walked past. “Wie bischt, Vera and Betsy?” Sarah balanced her container of whoopee pies and stepped into stride alongside Vera, who toted a cake plate covered in foil. When Betsy skipped ahead of them, Sarah whispered, “We haven’t had a chance to talk since—”

  “The Lord’s will has been done.” Vera kept her eyes straight ahead and moved faster toward the house. There was no mistaking Vera’s sharp tone of voice.

  “Well, of course it has.” Sarah had failed to stop the wedding, but was Vera going to hold a grudge? “I—I hope that—”

  “Sarah, now is not the time.” Vera hurried in front of Sarah and up the porch steps with Betsy.

  Sarah followed slowly, unsure what to make of Vera’s attitude. She’d done everything she could do. What had the woman expected? And did she somehow blame her for how it ended?

  “Emily, dear.” Vera hugged her daughter, then Sarah did the same.

  Sarah put her whoopee pies alongside the many other dishes on Emily’s kitchen table, then made her way around the room greeting the other ladies. Lillian was sitting on the couch with her two daughters, Anna and Elizabeth, and Katie Ann was carting Jonas on her hip. Levi’s sister-in-law, Beth Ann, was in the far corner. Beth Ann was another woman in their community who had been married ample time to have conceived a child, but like Emily, was still not pregnant. Sarah hoped Beth Ann didn’t start whining about it the way she was sometimes known to do. Hannah, Ida Mae, Karen, Frieda, and Laura Jane were already there—all kin to Katie Ann through her husband, Eli.

  The only person Sarah didn’t see was Danielle. Emily had already told her that she’d extended an invitation to Danielle in an effort to make her feel welcomed into the family. Emily was like that. Always sweet. Sarah knew she should be more like Emily. Sometimes there was a bitterness that crept inside Sarah’s soul, an unpleasant restlessness that she knew she brought on by her actions. She took a deep breath and once again resolved to be a better person.

  But when Danielle walked in, Sarah felt her resolve melt like butter on a griddle. If there was anything to be thankful for, it was that Martha wasn’t with Danielle. The older Englisch woman was obnoxious, and Sarah couldn’t believe she’d been allowed into their circle. Martha had attended several Sisters Days in the past, arriving with Katie Ann, and she went to most worship services. Sarah was sure the Lord didn’t approve of Martha and her place within their community. If she hadn’t been welcomed in, surely Danielle wouldn’t have been able to sink her talons into Levi . . .

  Danielle’s long blond hair was pulled to one side in a braid, and Sarah tried not to think about Levi running his hands through it while they slept side by side at night. At least Danielle had dressed conservatively today, not the trashy way she’d been known to in the past. Sarah couldn’t help but feel a slight sense of satisfaction that Danielle’s face was red as she shuffled into the room. And her satisfaction grew when she noticed the box of store-bought cookies in Danielle’s hands.

  LEVI WONDERED HOW Danielle was faring at Sisters Day, knowing he probably shouldn’t have pushed her into going, but he longed for her to be acknowledged by his family. His mother hadn’t been back to the house since the morning after the wedding. And according to Daed, Mamm refused to speak about his marriage. Jacob had been coming to help Levi work on the house in the evenings, but even his brother avoided conversation about Levi’s marriage.

  He missed the closeness of family, of community. He could tell that Danielle was doing her best to be a good wife, but their married life wasn’t anything like he’d expected. Things started out awkward, and there hadn’t been much change. They weren’t intimate like husband wife should be. Levi knew that was his fault, and he prayed daily that he’d done the right thing by marrying Danielle. The calling had seemed so strong before, but he worried that he’d misread God’s plan for him.

  If there was a saving grace today, it was Emily. Levi knew that his sister would be good to Danielle and do her best to make her feel included.

  Levi walked to the buggy and got his lunch pail, as well as his father’s. Daed had been picking him up for work every morning around six o’clock. Levi missed his mother’s hearty breakfast before he set out for work; Danielle was still sleeping when he left. He was grateful for the lunch Danielle always made for him the night before, but the store-bought chicken salad was nothing like his mother made. Same went for the apple pie that Levi watched Danielle pull from a box to heat up.

  Today they were installing solar panels on an Englisch house that was still under construction. The panels weren’t meant to power up the entire house, just parts of it to minimize the electric bill. Levi wound his way around several construction workers to where his father was leaning against a stack of lumber. He handed him his black lunch pail.

  Levi was chewing on his first bite, trying not to frown, when his father spoke up. “How is married life?” Daed grinned.

  Levi tried to return the smile, not sure how his father had intended the question. “Gut,” Levi finally said before he took another bite, wondering if he’d ever have homemade bread again.

  They were quiet for a few moments, then Levi asked, “Has Mamm spoken of our marriage?”

  “Nee.” Daed pulled a thermos from his lunch box and took a sip of what Levi presumed was iced tea. Levi glanced at his own thermos filled with grape Kool-Aid. It couldn’t be that hard to make tea. “But that’s probably a gut thing, sohn,” his father added. “Your mamm is dealing with this the best way she knows how.”

  Levi doubted it. He reached into a bag of potato chips as he watched his father scoop out a spoonful of broccoli and raisin salad, Levi’s favorite. His mouth watered just thinking about the taste.

  Daed smiled as he handed the container and spoon to Levi, reaching for the bag of chips. “I don’t even remember the last time I had potato chips. Your mudder says they’re bad for my cholesterol.” His father bit into one of the chips with the same passion that Levi felt as he scooped up a bite of broccoli and raisin salad. Levi savored the flavor, and he could tell his father was doin
g the same thing with the chips, a gleam in his eyes as he ate two at a time.

  Levi had wanted to talk to Jacob about what was on his mind, but since his brother didn’t seem interested in talking much about him and Danielle, Daed was second in line. But every time Levi tried, the words just wouldn’t come. It would have been so much better and easier to talk to his older brother, but Levi suspected Beth Ann was putting distance between Levi and Jacob. Maybe he was wrong, but his brother’s wife didn’t respect Jacob’s place as head of the household. Everyone knew that Beth Ann ran most aspects of their lives.

  Daed wadded up the empty chip bag and handed it back to Levi. “Can’t let your mamm see the evidence,” he said, followed by a chuckle.

  Levi gave him the empty container and spoon, wishing there had been twice the amount inside.

  “I woulda told your mudder to send a lunch for you too, but I figure no sense fueling her fire. She’d think your new fraa wasn’t taking care of you.”

  “It’s okay. She . . .” Levi paused. “She doesn’t really know how to cook.” He thought about the frozen pizza they’d had for dinner last night. Mamm would have fallen over. Levi had always thought that he’d marry an Amish girl whose mother had taught her to cook. Now he faced the possibility of never having a home-cooked meal again. But he thought about how Danielle had been trying to make bread. At least she was trying, even though Levi had no idea what she was doing wrong. How hard could it be to get bread to rise? Mamm and Emily did it daily, several loaves.

  Daed gave him a sorrowful smile. “I’ve heard Martha say repeatedly that she doesn’t cook, so I reckon the girl didn’t have much opportunity to learn. Be patient with her.”

  Levi nodded and followed his father back to the buggy. They both put the pails on the backseat. Then Levi couldn’t stand it anymore. “Daed . . .”

  His father turned to him. “Ya, sohn? What is it?”