Simone Kirsch 01 - Peepshow

by Leigh Redhead

  ‘She has most likely checked herself out and gone home, so we do her there. Then we go to Sandringham, get my speedboat and take care of the other one on the

  “Midnight Lady”. After that I need you to take me to the school, we’ve got to pick up Dominic for soccer clinic at three thirty.’

  ‘You have a speedboat?’ the driver said. ‘Cool.’

  Chapter Twenty-eight

  The doors closed on their lift and the next one dinged.

  I got in and pressed ground. We descended slowly, stopping on every floor. I kept pressing the door close button and people looked at me like I was one of those crazy people who sit next to you on public transport. When we reached the ground floor I raced out into the lobby.

  Sal and his mate were walking out the double doors, heading off to the car park. In front of the hospital a TV

  news crew were doing their thing and I pulled the hat lower. A disabled taxi pulled up, discharging a patient in a wheelchair. Soon as the chair hit the ground I slipped into the back.

  ‘You’re keen,’ said the driver.

  ‘You have no idea,’ I whispered hoarsely. ‘I need to get to St Kilda marina, and fast.’

  He turned to look at me. ‘First I’m going to need proof you can pay the fare.’

  ‘Fuck’s sake.’ I reached into the purse and pulled out a fifty, gave it to him. ‘You can keep the change if you get me there in under ten.’

  ‘Hold onto your hat,’ he said.

  We sped down Punt Road and into Barkly Street, the cabbie changing lanes like a demon, beeping wildly and driving up everybody’s arse. We screeched right at Dickens and pulled up across the road from the marina.

  ‘You’re a credit to your profession,’ I said, and hopped across Marine Parade.

  Reg had almost finished his book when I lurched into the shed. He looked up in alarm.

  ‘Reg, it’s me, Simone.’

  ‘Cripes.’ He peered at me. ‘You look like you got hit by a bus. You all right? I’ve been trying to call all day.’

  ‘You have?’

  ‘I saw the redheaded guy, early this morning. He motored in, got in a Ford Falcon and drove away. Half an hour later he was back with supplies and I was ready.

  I followed him in the skiff, inconspicuous, just like you said. The boat’s anchored three nautical miles out, she’s a forty-foot Caribbean Flybridge Cruiser. I sailed past, then came back here and I’ve been ringing your mobile ever since. To tell you the truth I haven’t had this much excitement in a long while.’

  ‘Good work, Reg, but I’ve got some bad news. The guy behind the kidnapping is on his way to shoot my friend. He’s going to be in Sandringham soon, getting on a speedboat. First I want to call the water police, then I want to get out there.’ It hurt to speak so I kept it brief.

  I hoped Reg was up for a little more excitement.

  ‘There’s the phone,’ he said. ‘I’ll get the boat ready.’

  I dialled triple zero and rasped down the line: ‘I want to report an attempted murder, it’s on a boat called the

  “Midnight Lady” anchored three nautical miles from the St Kilda marina. Get the water police out there.’

  ‘You’ll have to slow down, ma’am. First, can I have your name and location?’

  ‘Simone Kirsch, St Kilda marina. I have to get to the boat, Salvatore Parisi is going to kill Chloe Wozniak. Send the police. Please. I gotta go.’ My voice cracked. I hung up, shuffled out to the sailing school yacht and climbed aboard. The engine was going but Reg wasn’t on deck.

  Then I saw him, swinging open the wire gate and striding down the decking, big gun in hand. I swear, it seemed to happen in slow motion like a Jerry Bruckheimer movie.

  I may even have heard a guitar riff.

  ‘Is that a shotgun, Reg?’

  He nodded. ‘Smith and Wesson twelve gauge pump action. Mate of mine keeps it on his boat in case of sharks. May need it if we’re going up against a fella with a gun.’ He untied the boat, jumped in and maneuvered out of the marina onto the open waters of the bay. The boat was slow and the engine laboured. I wanted to get there before Sal and convince Blue to let Chloe go.

  ‘Can’t you go any faster?’ I squinted as the sun reflected off the water. Reg cranked up the engine until it whined. My head pounded, my body ached and when the boat slammed over small waves I felt sick in the guts.

  At the same time I was wired, indignant, jumped up on anger. How dare Sal betray me. I’d done everything he asked, been a good girl, found his brother’s killer, not sicked the police onto him. And for what? So he could whack Chloe and me anyway?

  And then there was Farquhar. Even though he was dead I was still livid when I thought about him breaking into my house, trying to kill me. And Mick, I didn’t want to get started on him. What was with these violent, power-tripping men? Where did they get off? And it was such bullshit, hiding behind their heavies and their guns.

  Penis substitutes, no doubt. Well I had a big dick of my own now and I wasn’t afraid to use it. I picked up the shotgun. ‘How’s this thing work?’ I asked.

  Reg steered the rudder as he explained it to me.

  ‘Pretty easy. Bullets are along here and to load you just move the slider back. She’s got five rounds, couldn’t find any more ammo.’

  I loaded and the gun made a chick-chick sound like it does in the movies.

  ‘Aim, press the trigger and fire, then reload. I warn you though, a shottie doesn’t have much of a range so you’ll have to get up close and it’s got a big kick. Watch your shoulder.’

  ‘How come you’re such an expert on guns?’ I asked.

  Reg smiled. ‘There’s a lot you don’t know about me.’

  I held up the gun and was practising my aim when a boat came into view. A speck at first, gradually growing larger.

  ‘That’s her,’ said Reg. The ‘Midnight Lady’ gleamed white with blue trim, the wheelhouse high up top and a small square deck at the back. My pulse rocketed. Please let Blue be so in love with Chloe he lets her go. Then I heard Reg: ‘Did you say the bad guy had a speedboat?’

  It was coming up from the opposite direction, moving rapidly.

  ‘What do you want me to do?’ Reg shouted.

  ‘Keep going! I’m not going to lie down and take it up the arse from these cocksuckers any longer.’

  Reg’s forehead creased into a frown. ‘Language,’ he said disapprovingly, but he didn’t turn back. I could see the two figures on the speedboat pointing at me and Reg.

  We were closer to the Caribbean but they were coming up twice as fast.

  They pulled up to the ‘Midnight Lady’ when we were still a hundred metres away and Sal’s chauffeur trained his pistol on us while Sal crouched behind him. I crawled to the bow of the boat and lay down on deck, aimed the shotgun and fired. A deafening boom, a whack in my shoulder and the pellets dropped uselessly into the water. The chauffeur returned fire and I heard a bullet thwack into the mast. Reg, god bless him, kept heading for the speedboat and I held my head down as the guy continued shooting. He was useless at hitting a moving target, probably only killed people execution style, or used the gun for show.

  As we got closer I fired again, more shoulder pain, and the chauffeur was hit in the arm with a spray of pellets. He yelped and dropped his gun into the water, staggered back and fainted. Sal climbed up a small ladder and onto deck then ducked down out of sight.

  Reg expertly maneuvered the sailing boat alongside the speedboat and tied off. I grabbed onto the ladder, floral tent billowing, still holding the shotgun. I looked back briefly and saw Reg tending to the unconscious man, ripping off part of his shirt to tourniquet his arm. I hoped he wouldn’t look up and see I wasn’t wearing undies. I peeped over the railing to the rear deck but Sal wasn’t there. That’s when I heard the gunshot.

  Oh god, I thought, Chloe, no. I hauled myself on-board, raced to the hatch and plunged in, gun first like they do in the cop shows. It was a really dumb thing to do. The cabin was dark a
nd I heard a click and felt hot metal against my temple.

  ‘Drop the fucking gun,’ said Blue.

  Chapter Twenty-nine

  I dropped the shottie. ‘Don’t shoot,’ I said, pathetically.

  ‘Put the gun down, babe.’ The voice was Chloe’s. ‘It’s Simone.’ She turned on the light and pushed Blue’s hand away. He was sweating, his face as red as his hair.

  Sal lay dead on the carpet, a hole in his head and a dark pool of blood soaking into the shag pile. My stomach turned. I looked at Chloe. Her roots were dark and she’d put on a couple of kilos but otherwise looked good. The tracksuit wasn’t ugly at all. It was pink velour.

  Very J-Lo.

  ‘At least I think it’s her,’ she said. ‘What’s with the smock? You pregnant?’

  And then, ‘Fuck, mate, look at your face, your neck. . . what happened?’

  ‘It’s a long story,’ I said. She held out her arms and I hugged her, a proper hug, with no awkwardness or back patting. Then, like an enormous sook, I started crying and couldn’t stop. Sobs wracked my body and my nose ran with snot.

  That’s how the water police found us when they burst in with guns drawn. We surrendered and they took us all in, even Reg.

  Sal’s chauffeur was taken to hospital under police guard and they interviewed the rest of us in separate rooms back at their Williamstown headquarters. I was getting no love from the water rats, what with the stolen purse and track-marks, so I used my phone call to contact Detective McCullers. Once she arrived things moved a little quicker, but she was real pissed off with me for not telling the police about the kidnapping. She started to lecture me but stopped when I told her Sal had someone from St Kilda Road on his payroll. She told me she’d look into it.

  ‘How’s Alex doing?’ I asked and her face opened up and seemed to flood with light.

  ‘He’s going to be OK. The bullet hit high in his chest, deflected off the second rib and lodged in his scapula. They’ve managed to remove it and he’s being shifted from ICU to a private room sometime tonight.’

  Blue was charged with kidnapping and manslaughter, and Chloe, Reg and I saw him on our way out. Two police officers were escorting him down the corridor, hands cuffed behind his back, when he broke free, ran over and kissed Chloe on the mouth. ‘I did it all for love,’

  he announced as they dragged him away. Chloe rolled her eyes.

  I apologised to Reg for getting him involved.

  ‘You’re right, love,’ he smiled. ‘Haven’t seen so much action since the battle of Long Tan.’

  Chloe and I caught a ride back to my flat in a squad car. She flirted with the young constable all the way and got him to pull into a drive-through and shout us cigarettes and champagne.

  ‘You’re incorrigible,’ I whispered.

  ‘That’s a good thing, right?’

  Soon as we got into my place, using the spare key I’d cunningly hidden in the communal laundry, I ripped off the itching polyester dress and jumped into the shower.

  I used every fruit flavoured, foaming, moisturising unguent I possessed. Finally I smelled good, even though I still looked like shit. I swallowed four painkillers, threw on my second favourite pair of trackie daks and collapsed on the couch. Chloe was cross-legged on the floor, simultaneously sucking down a bong and booking herself in for a bleach job and a Brazilian.

  ‘You’d better have a lot of wax,’ she told the beautician, ‘I’ve gone feral. It’s a fucking forest down there.’

  We cracked open the Yellowglen and unwrapped the pack of Winnie Blues. I told her everything, my voice a hoarse whisper. Even about Mick.

  ‘So while I was kidnapped you still managed to find time for a root?’

  ‘Hey,’ I said, ‘a girl has urges.’

  Chloe nodded. ‘True.’

  ‘What about you and Blue?’

  ‘What about us?’

  ‘I did it all for love?’

  She shook her head and packed another cone. ‘I didn’t screw him til the second week. He’s not exactly my type but there was fuck—all else to do and I was getting horny, you know? I think he’s in love with me but I just like him as a friend. What’s going on with you and this Mick dude?’

  ‘It’s over between us,’ I said. ‘It has to be.’

  ‘You still want him though.’ She could read me like a book.

  ‘Yeah, but I’m not going to have him. Fucking men, I’m over them. I’m going to turn lesbian.’

  Chloe laughed, coughing out bong smoke. ‘Yeah right. You like cock too much.’

  When Chloe left for her beauty appointments I went to bed to have a small nap. I don’t know if it was the stress, my injuries, or some canal-borne virus, but I was out for two days.

  Chapter Thirty

  I wandered out to the lounge, yawning and scratching the back of my head where the hair had clumped into dreadlocks. Chloe was on the couch watching Oprah, painting her toenails fluorescent pink and eating Barbecue Shapes. I sat down and hugged her.

  ‘What’s come over you?’ she asked.

  ‘Dunno, what day is it?’ I had my voice back.

  ‘Friday.’

  ‘What’d I miss?’

  ‘About three thousand phone calls and us being the lead news story for the last two nights. Don’t worry, I saved it all for you.’ She showed me a scrapbook of newspaper clippings and a videocassette. I hugged her again and she looked at me suspiciously. ‘I reckon Farquhar injected you with E, not smack. Want a coffee?’

  I nodded sleepily and flicked through the scrapbook while she went to the kitchen. The journos had mixed up my real and stage names and referred to me as Vivien Kirsch, which was good, but had included a publicity still of me in a sequined bikini, which was not. There were heaps of photos of Chloe, some from her Picture spread and paparazzi shots of her in dark glasses, coming out my front door. She put the pot and two mugs on the coffee table.

  ‘You’re famous,’ I said.

  ‘I’m about to get more famous.’

  ‘What are you talking about?’

  She smiled proudly and pushed down the plunger,

  ‘I’m going on tell y. “A Current Affair”, mate. The kidnapped stripper who fell in love with her captor.

  It’s a crime story, it’s a love story, and there’s tits and arse. At least that’s what the producer said. They want to do a story on you too, but I told them you wouldn’t be into it.’

  ‘You told them right. They paying you?’ I poured myself a cup. The first sip was heaven.

  ‘Three grand for an exclusive. I’m going to split it with you.’

  ‘You don’t have to—’

  ‘You saved my life.’

  ‘Blue saved your life,’ I said. ‘He shot Sal.’

  ‘Sal told Blue he was coming to let me go. If it wasn’t for all the commotion you and that old bloke started we wouldn’t have known anything was up. I’ll split the money with you, fifty-fifty. No argument.’

  I remembered I had a month’s rent overdue and stopped arguing. ‘When do you film the segment?’

  ‘Tomorrow, so they can screen it on Monday.’

  ‘You’ll be the most famous stripper in Melbourne,’

  I said.

  Chloe clapped her hands with excitement. ‘Isn’t it great?’

  The phone rang and I groaned, but reached for it. Time to get my life back in order. It was my agent Kelvin, and he was freaking out.

  ‘I’m sorry to bother you, Simone. I’ve seen the news and I know you’re injured but you’ve got to help me.

  Sabrina’s fucked me around again. I booked her and Jamie to do a bi-twin show at five thirty for an office party and they’ve gone AWOL. Mobiles switched off.

  Do you know anyone who can fill in?’

  I held the phone to my chest. ‘Want to do a double show in two hours?’ I asked Chloe.

  ‘What? With you limping around?’

  ‘You could ask Aurora.’

  She thought about it for a second. ‘OK. She’s h
ot.’

  ‘Kelvin,’ I said, ‘I’ll call you back.’

  Aurora turned up half an hour later with champagne and a bunch of orchids for Chloe and me. She hugged us both. My life was turning into a regular love-in.

  ‘You two crazy chicks have been all over the news,’

  she said. ‘I was supposed to be in the rescue party but someone forgot to call me.’

  ‘I was a little pressed for time,’ I said.

  ‘So I’ve read.’

  ‘Aurora figured out about the boat though,’ I told Chloe, ‘since I was too dense to work out your clues.’

  ‘They were good clues.’ Chloe wrestled with the wire around the cork. ‘I spent ages working out those clues.’

  Aurora sat on the couch and crossed her long legs.

  ‘Guess what?’ she said. ‘I’m moving to the Gold Coast.’

  Chloe popped the champagne and poured three glasses. ‘Really, when?’

  ‘Next week. I just decided on the spur of the moment. Apparently the table-dancing scene in Surfers is really good, kind of like Melbourne in the early nineties.’

  ‘Wow,’ I said. ‘What’s Betty think about that?’

  ‘She’s not too happy. She wants to come up with me.’

  ‘Do you want that?’ I asked.

  Aurora shrugged. ‘Betty can be hard to handle.

  Exhausting. I mean, I love the girl but she’s doing so much coke at the moment. One minute she’s arrogant and bitchy and the next teary, clingy and paranoid.’

  ‘What about Johnny?’

  ‘He told her last week he wanted to break things off for a while.’

  ‘Shit,’ I said.

  ‘Anyway, I’m having a going away barbie at Betty’s on Sunday. I’d love it if you could both come. It’s starting about three. Pretty casual. Bring a plate if you want.’

  ‘We’ll be there,’ said Chloe, ‘but right now I need to know what I’m wearing for this show.’

  They decided on a bondage theme, and Chloe borrowed my latex outfit, a pair of handcuffs and a riding crop. I have some really cool things on the top shelf of my closet, up the back near the X rated videos.