The Sweet Smell of Magnolias and Memories

by Celeste Fletcher McHale

  “I think I’m falling for you,” he said. “I knew it a year ago. It’s because of your courage and compassion and your heart. You can call it crazy, and you can say it’s too soon. But I’m falling for you harder and faster than I ever thought possible.”

  Jacey stared at him. Frankly, he could’ve sung the ABCs after saying he was falling for her because she didn’t hear the rest of it. The ringing in her ears prevented it.

  “I need to go,” she said, getting up from the sofa. “Do you know where I left my shoes?”

  Colin stayed on the sofa. “You didn’t wear any,” he said.

  “You know what? I didn’t,” Jacey said, nervously moving all over the travel trailer in quick bursts, looking for things she didn’t even bring with her last night. “Then I guess I just need my keys.”

  “I put them on top of the refrigerator,” Colin said.

  She walked quickly to the kitchen area and tried to reach the top of the fridge, but didn’t even come close. She saw a box on the floor, dragged it over, and stepped on top—but she fell straight through.

  Colin chuckled and stood up. “Empty,” he said.

  Jacey smiled and stepped out of the cardboard. “Sorry,” she said. “If you could just reach my keys, I will get out of your hair. No point in hanging around. I’ve taken up too much of your time anyway, and I need to . . .” She watched him walk slowly toward her. That chest. That wavy, messy hair. That body. She cringed. Georgia was right. Jacey was going to hell.

  “You need to what?” he asked.

  “Touch . . . I mean go. Um, I need to go,” she said.

  Colin reached toward the top of the fridge, fetched her keys, and dropped them into her hand. Then he lowered his face closer to hers.

  “Okay then,” she said, pointing toward the door. “I’ll just go ahead and go now.”

  He smiled and let her pass by without reaching for her.

  “Bye, now,” she said, practically jogging to the door.

  “Bye.”

  Jacey slammed the door of the travel trailer and ran through the grass, wet with morning dew. She could not get out of there fast enough. Falling for her? Why did he say that? He’d said it out loud. Was he insane? Clearly there was something wrong with the man, and she’d just spent most of the night at his house. What if he was a serial killer posing as a preacher? He could be an escaped convict. Or mean to dogs. What if he liked cats? A man didn’t just go around telling women he didn’t know that he was falling for them. It was crazy, and he was crazy too.

  She glanced at the clock in her car and drove straight to the hospital where Georgia worked, ten minutes away. When she got to the emergency room parking lot, she texted Georgia.

  “Come outside ASAP.”

  She put down the phone and closed her eyes. Her thoughts turned back to Demarcus and Lillian. Her heart ached as she thought about that sweet boy who never got a chance to live, and the thought brought fresh tears to her eyes. She pictured him twirling her hair and singing nursery rhymes in her lap. And telling her about his cars and trucks. She felt sick each time she remembered the force that ripped him away from her, knowing she had been powerless to stop it. But she was determined to find the other three boys and make sure their lives turned out to be something special—for their mother and their brother.

  Georgia opened her car door and startled her.

  “Good morning, you brazen harlot,” she said. “Please tell me all about it. Don’t leave out a single detail.”

  “I remembered, Georgie. I remembered what happened after the flood. All of it.”

  Georgia’s demeanor changed immediately. “Oh, Jacey, honey, I am so sorry. Are you all right?” she asked. “Do you want to come in and see if we can find Dr. Plauche? He’s probably making rounds.”

  Jacey sighed. “No,” she said. “I’m okay. I promise. In fact, I feel much better now that I can remember it.”

  Georgia grabbed Jacey’s hand and squeezed it. “I wish I could’ve told you,” she said. “We just didn’t think it was a good idea. Dr. Plauche thought it would be better for you to remember it on your own. Did it just come back to you?”

  “Well, not entirely,” Jacey said. “After you went back to bed last night, I starting snooping around online. It only took one search.”

  Georgia shook her head.

  “I don’t think I really wanted to know Not until lately,” Jacey said.

  “Because of Colin?”

  “Probably,” Jacey said. “Seeing him has sped up the flashbacks. Before he came, they happened every now and then. But when he showed up . . . boom. I could almost summon them. I couldn’t take it anymore. It made me feel so anxious. I think last night I just decided it was time to know, and I knew exactly how to find out.”

  “And you’re sure you’re okay?”

  “I am, really. I’ve decided I’m going to find the other boys. I want to make sure they’re all right and being taken care of.”

  “I think that is a fabulous idea,” Georgia said. “I’m in too. Now . . . about last night . . .”

  Jacey rolled her eyes. “Nothing happened.”

  “Don’t even try to sell me that. He’s a preacher, not a dead man. And I am quite sure preachers have sex. How else do they get all nine hundred and ninety-nine of them kids they all have?”

  “You are so depraved.”

  “Oh, I know. What’s that got to do with anything?”

  Jacey looked at her friend. “He told me he thought he was falling for me.”

  Georgia’s mouth flew open. “Really? How exciting! What did you say?”

  “I got my keys and left,” Jacey said, her voice indignant.

  “How . . . mature of you,” Georgia said.

  “What was I supposed to do? He doesn’t even know me.”

  “I don’t think that’s entirely accurate,” Georgia said. “I think he got to know you pretty dang well on that roof. I think for each day you spent together there, it was like . . . three months in dog years.”

  “Be serious, Georgie.”

  “I am serious,” Georgia said. “I think the man knows exactly what he wants, probably always did. He found it, lost it, and found it again. He was probably afraid not to tell you. Think about it.”

  Jacey didn’t answer.

  “Let me guess,” Georgia said. “Your overactive writer’s imagination has turned him into some dangerous criminal, probably a member of ISIS, and you’ve decided you should stay away from him.”

  Jacey made a face. “Serial killer,” she murmured.

  Georgia’s eyebrow shot up. “Oh, even better,” she said. “Let me ask you this: How does he make you feel?”

  Jacey smiled a little bit thinking about waking up in his arms, strong and protective.

  “See?” Georgia said, reading her face.

  “Still, it’s . . . I don’t know . . . soon.”

  “My grandparents got married four days after they met and stayed married sixty-four years,” Georgia said. “Next argument?”

  Jacey didn’t have one and was suddenly a little ashamed of herself for running out of his trailer so quickly. She looked at Georgia. “He sure can kiss.”

  Georgia smiled. “Looks like it,” she said. “And I’ll tell you something else. You need to get honest with yourself.”

  Jacey frowned. “What do you mean by that?”

  “You need to examine your feelings for him. I think they run a lot deeper than you realize.”

  Jacey brushed her off. “No,” she said. “I know you’re cheering for the fairy tale, but there ain’t one going on here.”

  “You sure about that?” Georgia asked. “By the way, I want you to pull the rearview mirror down and take a good look at yourself. Surely he meant what he said. I can’t even look at you right now.”

  Jacey pulled the mirror down and looked at her reflection. She looked horrible. Swollen eyes complete with evidence of the sandman’s visit. Mascara all over her face, hair a hot mess, and some kind of nose debris st
uck on her cheek. She made a disgusted face. “Ugh.”

  “Not a pretty sight, is it?” Georgia asked. “Go home and do something about it before you venture out into the world today.” She opened the car door and put one foot out. “I’d like to stay and chat, but a nice gentleman with a power saw removed one of his thumbs this morning. I’m thinking that’s a wee bit more important than all this self-created drama.”

  Georgia shut the door and left Jacey staring at her reflection.

  CHAPTER EIGHT

  Colin stirred the scrambled eggs and smiled. Could she have gotten out of here any faster? When she had fallen through the box, it was all he could do not to laugh out loud—but she was already like a doe in headlights, so he’d held it in check. She was a beautiful mess, and he loved everything about her. He was glad he’d told her he was falling for her, even if it did send her running out the front door. Keeping the words to himself had felt like a weight around his neck. She was falling for him too—he was sure of it. It was just going to take her longer to figure it out. That was fine with Colin. He had nothing but time. In fact, he was going to let her stew in her juices for a while.

  He checked his watch. He had an appointment with Reverend Willis this morning across town. Then he was going back to Biloxi for a couple of days for business. One of his houses was nearly finished, and he wanted to make sure the work was done and done right. He trusted the men he hired, but he always liked to be there for the final inspection.

  More than anything, though, he really wanted to go back because this was the best part. He liked to watch a family when they held the keys to their new house for the first time. There wasn’t another feeling like it in the world. Being a part of that moment kept him going. Even when the money ran out, even when he couldn’t find any help, even when his father tried to stop him, seeing the faces of a homeless family walking into a house that was theirs made all the struggles worthwhile. His father called it “wasting money,” but Colin called it “investing in people.” And the battle raged on.

  He knew he’d eventually have to talk face-to-face with his father and stop the phone calls. Jasper wasn’t the type to conduct family business over the phone. He wanted his son in front of him so he could hammer and hammer and hammer until he chiseled him into resolve. But Jasper had no idea who he was dealing with. The only reason Colin had avoided another man-to-man talk was because it never ended well. He already knew what Jasper would do: First he’d try to make him feel guilty. Tell him how hard he’d worked all his life to pass the company along to his only son. When that didn’t work, there would be more threats of being cut off from the money. Colin had tried time and time again to tell him he didn’t want the money, that he could make his own way in the world. That sounded a lot better than saying, “I could never steer this company because I don’t respect the man at the helm. I may be your biological son, but I have no idea who you are.”

  Colin pushed the plate away and drank the last swallow of coffee. Maybe this week was a good time to have the final showdown with his father and cut ties with Biloxi altogether. He liked Baton Rouge. He thought about Jacey sleeping in his arms this morning. And he sure liked the scenery.

  He picked up the phone and dialed the numbers.

  “Hello?”

  “Aaron?” Colin said.

  “Hey, buddy,” Aaron replied. “Where you been, man?”

  “Baton Rouge,” Colin said. “Taking care of a little business.”

  “That sounds right,” Aaron said. “What else is going on?”

  “I’m headed back to Biloxi for a few days and need a place to crash.”

  “Door’s always open for you, brother,” Aaron said.

  “Thanks, man, I owe you. Hey, speaking of owing you . . . Remember when you said you wanted to find a good Catholic girl with her own mind, her own job, and a sense of humor?”

  “Had I been drinking?”

  “I was at Mass with you.” Colin laughed. “I think you’d only had communion.”

  Aaron laughed. “I remember.”

  “Well,” Colin said. “Have I got a girl for you.”

  Jacey stood in the shower and alternately thought about Colin, Demarcus, Lillian, and the other boys. Her heart ached with the loss and her tears fell silently, washed away with the water that swirled down the drain. But it wasn’t just sorrow she felt. Something else began to rise inside her and fought for her attention. So many conflicting feelings . . . sorrow and hope, anxiety and exhilaration, regret and contentment. This wasn’t over yet—the flood, the death of Lillian and Demarcus, her own injuries wouldn’t end in sorrow. Jacey wouldn’t allow it.

  She wanted to begin the process of finding the surviving boys today. It broke her heart to think about them all alone in the world, no mother or father, and a little brother they adored, gone. She prayed they were together and happy, regardless of where they were. Maybe a family had adopted them all, or maybe they were in a foster home awaiting placement. Whatever the case, she was determined to find them and see for herself. She would make it her mission to see that those boys had a fair chance at a good life. It was the least she could do.

  “I’m falling for you,” Colin had said. Those little words took up a minuscule amount of space on a piece of paper, yet they had the power to change someone’s entire world. The words had scared her out of her mind this morning, made her run out of his house like a kid caught stealing bubble gum. Why had she done that? It seemed childish and immature to her now, but earlier it had been her natural reaction. She’d heard those words before from another man she’d dated for a nearly a year, but they didn’t scare her then. In fact, she was ashamed to say she hadn’t really felt anything at all. Except maybe a little guilt because she hadn’t felt the same way. But they certainly hadn’t made her run. So why did she run out of the house at Mach 5 with her hair on fire this morning? She had to go back to the trailer and apologize to Colin for acting like a child. Besides, she thought what scared her most of all was that she felt the exact same way he did. She wondered if she was falling for him too.

  Jacey turned off the water and hurriedly dried her body. She wrapped a towel around her hair, put on her robe, and went to the kitchen. She would try some of that sleepytime tea this morning. Surely it would knock her out. Maybe she wasn’t falling in love with Colin Jennings: She just needed some sleep, and that was all. She had learned and remembered some disturbing news last night, and she wasn’t thinking clearly. That was understandable.

  She would’ve run out the door regardless of what he said. The man was half-naked and gorgeous. Really gorgeous. And those lips . . . she didn’t need to be there. Of course she ran. It was absolutely the normal response any self-respecting Southern girl would’ve had. Probably. Maybe. Sort of. Not really. She put the kettle on the burner. Then the realization punched her in the face.

  “You’re an idiot,” she said out loud. “A walking, breathing idiot. You are falling in love with him.”

  Somehow saying the words out loud made her reaction crystal clear. Colin’s words hadn’t scared her to death: Her own feelings had. She’d never been in love before, so she didn’t know exactly how it was supposed to feel. But overwhelmed was a good word to start with, followed closely by excited, apprehensive, and for some reason, liberated. She felt alarmingly and deliciously aware of another human being. How about just plain old freaked out? So this was how it felt to fall in love . . . She decided she liked it.

  She turned off the burner and grabbed her phone. She had to tell him, needed to tell him. How could she keep this information to herself? No wonder he had told her. He’d recognized the truth and wanted to share it with her.

  She dialed Colin’s number, but it went to voicemail. Forget it. She’d drive over there and tell him herself. Wasn’t that the proper protocol for saying, “I may be falling in love with you”? In person? Maybe. She didn’t know. But nothing sounded sweeter to her than being near him again.

  She rushed to her room to dry her hair and
get herself ready. She was on a mission that had to be completed today. Right now. Yesterday would have been even better.

  Fifteen minutes later she was in the car, headed for the Promised Land. The scenarios played through her mind . . . Should she just blurt it out as soon as he opened the door? Should she wait a few minutes? Throw herself into his arms on sight? They all seemed like excellent choices, as long as she got the words out of her mouth. She’d waited all her life to fall in love, and now that she was headed in that direction, she wanted to shout it from the proverbial rooftop.

  She drove up in front of his trailer but didn’t see his truck, and her natural high deflated a bit. Where was he? Had he said he was going somewhere today? She couldn’t remember, probably because of the Olympic gold medal for sprinting she’d won when she left earlier. She parked the car and looked at her watch. She’d give it a little while and see if he came back soon. If not, she’d surely see him tonight.

  Colin backed out of the driveway of Reverend Willis’s office and steered his truck toward Interstate 10. He was headed to Biloxi, but an odd sadness washed over him. It was strange when you no longer looked forward to going home. He didn’t really have a home to go to anyway. The travel trailer was home to him now, and he could park it anywhere.

  Reverend Willis had certainly given him a lot to think about. Colin had made it clear to the man once before he wasn’t interested in serving as the pastor of any church—that instead he preferred to minister to the outside world. But Jim Willis had another idea. He wanted Colin to be the pastor of their new outreach program. They wanted someone who would minister to the needs of people in dire straits, and not your average Sunday-morning pew-sitter. Reverend Willis said he already had a church full of pew-sitters, but he wanted to extend a hand to the less fortunate and needed help to do it. Colin’s title would be associate pastor, but he wouldn’t always work within the walls of the church. Reverend Willis assured him he would still be able to build homes for the needy and rebuild for people who had lost their property in disasters, and he hoped Colin could even find some new volunteers to help him among the members. Colin agreed to think about it.