Rainn on My Parade

by LoRee Peery

  And grandparenting skills, for talking that way in front of Mia. Did he think Mia didn’t have ears, or feelings?

  Why did some people feel the need to wag their tongues at the expense of others?

  It was so hard to rein in a hardened, angry response. Rainn clenched his jaw so hard that his molars ached. He turned his back to them when he hunkered down to Mia’s side.

  “Mia, honey, hold your arms still, please. And look at me.”

  She swung her legs around to face him, before obliging.

  “That’s better. Are you finished eating?”

  She nodded. He held out his hand. “Let’s go find Geneva or Moselle, shall we?”

  “Can I have a coke, Uncle Rainn?”

  “No soda pop here, big girl. Let’s find some juice.”

  “OK.”

  Her calm assurance brought him back to center, and vice versa, he hoped. They were good for one another.

  Faith, and family, and friends. God, Mia, Geneva, and the folks in Platteville. He’d rely on the Lord to enable him to overlook the faults of others, even his parents. Life wasn’t perfect. Responsibilities came with being part of the human race. His parents chose theirs, and he’d choose his duties.

  “I’ll bet Geneva knows right where we can find that juice.”

  “OK, Uncle Rainn.”

  Weaving through the group, Rainn cast his mind back. He had wondered, too many times to count over the years, about his own responsibility in Lindsay’s life choices. But it was such a useless waste of energy. Emotionally asking “why” equaled the senselessness of worry. Pointless, to his way of thinking.

  So if he trusted God with the little things as well as the big, and believed that all would work out for the good of all involved, he’d be the family man he was meant to be.

  Where was Geneva? He scoped out the room and spied her oohing and aahing over Marty and Camille Marolf’s baby. He grasped Mia’s hand and weaved a path in her direction.

  So, Father God, is Geneva part of Your plan for my earthly family? You know that having her in my life is a present desire of my heart. If she isn’t meant to be in my life, well, I don’t want to think about accepting that idea. But Mia will do for my family, if that is Your will.

  The prayer calmed his soul, but the little boy in him had the sudden urge to pound someone and escape, maybe to a special place for comfort, the way Mia swayed in Geneva’s glider.

  “I see her. There’s my Geneva.” Mia let go his hand and lunged. She hugged Geneva around the hips and waved her uncle off.

  Instead of running over the people in between, he shot Geneva a thank-you connection and greeted friend and stranger alike on his way back to his parents.

  “I don’t see what she could possibly be thinking, carrying on with a man younger than she is.” The spiteful words, close to a whisper, rasped over the hairs on the back of his neck. It took a lot sometimes, but he’d reached his limit.

  He’d had enough of the age thing.

  And small-town small minds.

  “What is Geneva doing?” a different voice chimed in. “Did you see her meet his parents? The way she blushed like a girl? Why, she’s flaunting their relationship like they’re both teenagers.”

  That’s it!

  “Besides, she’s old enough she could have been his mother as a girl,” yet another voice added.

  Not at age thirteen.

  Turning to the sources, he forced a smile. Wasn’t that long ago he’d faced Kate Rawlins in Frivolities.

  “Excuse me, ladies.” The others he couldn’t name. And they sure weren’t ladies in his estimation. “Thank you for coming this evening. And if you brought any food, I thank you for that.”

  Self-control. I know it’s a fruit of the Spirit, and You are the prime example, Lord. But why does it have to come with such difficulty?

  His ears buzzed and his chest felt tight, but he wouldn’t back down. “Judging by what I just overheard, Geneva is more my friend than yours.”

  He wanted to hit them with more than words, but kept his composure. “Since this gathering is to honor the memory of my sister, in support of my niece and myself, if your words can’t glorify our Lord, you may want to gather somewhere else for the rest of the night.”

  Shamefaced, each of the women reminded him of Lindsay as a little girl when she got caught messing with their mother’s makeup and fine jewelry.

  He shook his head at the idea of gossip opportunities disguised as concern. In his experience, tolerance was more exhibited in populated areas. But on the other side of the coin, neighbors didn’t know one another, even from across the hall. If there was trouble in small communities, even strangers came to the aid of needy souls.

  Following his thought, a woman he couldn’t name, mumbled, “You’re right, Mr. Harris. Please accept our apology.”

  Like all areas of life, living where a person chose had its good and bad points.

  All that to justify his actions, but no one would drag the people he loved through muddy gossip. His mind hiccupped at that thought. Love?

  Of course, he loved Geneva. And he was willing to make a life change, to be near her. The Lord would guide him, even if he had to give up restoring church windows and include a commute to Lincoln or Omaha for a nine-to-five.

  He’d do whatever it took. For now, he nodded in acceptance.

  ****

  Moselle, Lanae, and Geneva worked together in the church kitchen, cleaning up refreshments following the service for Lindsay. Geneva had sent the serving crew home after thanking those who represented women’s ministries at Faith Bible.

  “So, how was it, meeting Rainn’s parents, Mom?”

  Before answering, Geneva leaned over the counter to get a better look at Mia. She hunkered down in a corner between the cupboard and wall, engaged in a new electronic game her grandparents had given her. Geneva didn’t blame Mia one bit for escaping the milieu.

  Soon after Rainn had sought Geneva out, the women made their way for the kitchen, Mia in tow. Now, Geneva observed Mia more closely. Her creased forehead revealed her concentration. Beeps, blips, buzzes, followed by a girlish smile, and a couple giggles that cleared her face of its frown.

  Technology. Could it really be the way to a little girl’s heart?

  “I was so embarrassed when Eric made that comment about the kitten bringing us together.” Geneva finally answered Moselle.

  “Well, that’s about as useless as an apple core!” Lanae burst out.

  “What?” Moselle and Geneva chorused.

  “This scraper on a dried casserole dish.”

  “I’ll give it some muscle.” Moselle slithered behind Geneva, the move familiar in the way of kitchen-working women, and shoved Lanae with a nudge to the hip. “Anything else, Mom?”

  “Whenever Rainn is around, I have the strangest sensation, before I even see him. It’s like my soul yearns to answer the call to his soul. I don’t quite know how to explain it.” Her face heated. “And I didn’t want his folks to catch on.”

  “Mom, that’s the way it has always been between Eric and me.” Moselle gave the pot some elbow grease. “I could never consider another man besides Eric, even if some guy gave me the come-on. There wasn’t that chemistry, or whatever it’s called, between us.”

  “What in the world do you call that anyway?” Lanae wondered. “Pheromones or something?”

  “I believe it is God’s design for those couples who are meant to be together,” Moselle responded with a puff of air.

  “There’s a pull, a longing to be one with Rainn. But I’m not convinced we’re meant for one another because—”

  “Don’t say it,” Moselle and Lanae said in unison.

  “Mom, get real here. It’s not a sin, like there’s a commandment that says a man and woman should fit a particular mold in order to plan forever.”

  “It’s not a sin to look a guy over.” Lanae dried and rattled flatware into its drawer. “I’d be dead if I didn’t notice all these firefighters
and the fine condition they’re in. I know it’s a sin to actually lust, but I think what I’m doing is appreciating…”

  Lord, I admit that I’m lusting. Can I call it desire if Rainn is meant to be mine and we are to become one flesh?

  “My turn. I think it’s more than physical on Rainn’s part. I see him treat you with respect, and sometimes awe. I think you bring the best out in each other, which happens if you’re supposed to end up together. Eric and I feel that way about one another.”

  “I’d call that love,” Lanae added with a dreamy sigh.

  Geneva chose not to comment on that point. “With Bret I was always disappointed if I felt the tiniest spark of passion because it would fizzle out before he could say ‘good night.’” She felt all whispery inside, but she continued to express her feelings. “With Rainn, my whole body sizzles like the steam nozzle on my espresso machine. All I have to do is picture him or imagine his voice, and I get all squishy and warm.”

  “Waaay too much information,” Lanae said.

  “Tough. I’m going to say it. And, sorry Lord, for talking this way in the church building.” All revved up, Geneva took the plunge, making sure no one was close to the pass-through window. She was on a roll, but she still lowered her voice. “I never experienced true intimacy with Bret. You know, that two-become-one biblical description. There was always a void. What if God’s plan for my life is to be with Rainn? Then again, what if it’s supposed to be really passionate? Can I plug into that passion at my age, or did I miss the boat by not having that fulfillment as a young woman? I always wondered if there was something wrong with me, since my husband didn’t turn me on.”

  Lanae went to Geneva’s side and gave her a quick hug. “To me, aging equals freedom. What I’m saying is, you should be free to love and react to Rainn. Don’t give a fig about what others say or think, like me.”

  “Maybe. Maybe not. I’ll have to think about that freedom thing. I get confused and feel like I have no social skills at all when I see Rainn around other people. I’m afraid anyone else can sense the sparks that travel through me at the mere sound of his voice.”

  Moselle folded a wet dishtowel over the rod. “The Bible says a woman’s desire should be for her husband. So if you’re right with the Lord and believe it’s His will for you to be with Rainn, well, there you go.”

  Lanae fanned her hand in the air as though dismissing a pesky fly. “Just forget what people say, will ya? Kate Rawlins is so bitter over who-knows-what, that she justifies some past loss by pointing her tongue at others. Let the Lord deal with her. And as for you and how to act around your man, just go for it with all you’ve got, sister. All the gusto and va-va-va-voom you can muster up.”

  So many thoughts zinged through Geneva’s mind, she wanted to get out in the fresh air and clear them away. Currently, her pursuit for the rest of her life lay in the role of entrepreneur. But what was God’s path for her?

  If she chose Rainn, she’d have to take his niece as well. And raise another daughter.

  Mia stumbled over a mess of cardboard boxes and casserole carriers. It wasn’t noisy, so Mia had no cause to raise an alarm.

  Geneva waved her arms in exaggerated motions and expressed a lot of drama with her body. Then she stood tall and enunciated each word louder than the previous. “Crash! Boom! Bang! Shish kebab!”

  Mia froze in place, bug-eyed.

  “Oh, Mom, I totally forgot those lines. How many years has it been since you used that expression?” Moselle laughed so hard, she collapsed against the counter.

  Lanae looked at Geneva as though she had just landed from outer space. “I’ve heard everything, now. You’ve flipped your lid, sis.”

  They all went into hilarious laughter when a detached plastic lid rolled across the kitchen floor.

  The idea of raising another child, a special-needs girl, found a corner to plant itself in Geneva’s heart and mind, just as the lid plopped to a rest. She crossed to Mia’s side and held out her arms. The girl needed to know she was loved, and no one was laughing at her.

  If it’s meant to be, Lord, I’m done protesting.

  Rainn on My Parade

  13

  A few mornings after the memorial service, Rainn accepted his coffee from Geneva. He shifted from one foot to the other, watching her as he spoke. “I know you get tired of me asking, but I have another favor. For Mia.”

  “You know I’d do almost anything for that child.”

  “It seems you already have. I checked with the school and they have lots of arrangements to make. They’ll find an aide for Mia, and the principal wants to meet with us first, so she can find the most appropriate person to work with Mia. Could you go with me, just for a day?”

  Geneva’s laughter hit him straight beneath the heart. “It’s been a long time since I went to school, but sure.”

  “I don’t know that we both really need to be there, but Mia’s used to you. If I’m unavailable, the school office needs another contact person.”

  She wrapped her arm around his waist and gave him a squeeze, just above his belt. Rainn returned the gesture, wanting to wallow in her pillowy softness against his side.

  “When do we go?” Geneva covered his hand before slipping hers underneath. He felt her smooth fingers against the rasp of his raised calluses.

  “You that eager to exercise the muscle between your ears?” He squeezed her hand at his waist.

  “Hey, buster, I exercise that muscle on a daily basis. I’m a business woman, remember?”

  “But you’re so easy to tease.” Rainn gathered her close, and gave both arms a little swing, then leaned in and kissed her.

  He rendered her speechless when he kissed each fingertip. He laughed low and long, all the way through Frivolities. Recalling the way color rose on her face would warm him through the day.

  A few short days later, it was time for Mia to enroll in school. Rainn didn’t know why he’d put it off so long. Maybe he wanted Mia to acclimate herself to him and her new home first.

  Could a little girl get used to living without a mother?

  On his way to Lilac Street for Geneva, he prayed.

  Lord, forgive me for being so lax in taking life for granted. You know how things have been going with Lindsay and all. And adjusting to having Mia around, I haven’t talked to You like I ought. All I have to do is remember Afghanistan, a country in war for three decades. The mines. The poverty. The children. That place is so far removed from the affluence of the United States. Thank You. You saw fit for Mia and Lindsay and me to be born here. I just ask that You pave the way for Mia in school and for whatever home we end up having.

  After their greeting, he walked Geneva to the SUV, and rambled a bit. “I feel thankful, humble, blessed even, that Mia is whole. With her special needs and gifts, she is so rich compared to the children I’ve seen on the other side of the world.”

  “I’ve only seen third world countries on TV,” Geneva commented. “But from what I saw, I agree one hundred percent.”

  His best gals said hello when they reached the SUV as though they hadn’t seen each other in two weeks. He settled into the business of driving.

  On their way to Sharpe Elementary, Rainn realized the stress. The whole scene was so strange to him. He had to get used to it. The school was made of spiffy new brick and had a slew of windows. Tax dollars well spent.

  “Check it out, Mia. All those windows will help bring the outdoors in and keep you feeling sunny.”

  Mia wore a serious frown as they approached the building. She swiped at her hip bones while Rainn opened the door.

  “Here, hold my hand and you’ll feel better.”

  Rainn shot Geneva an appreciative glance. She seemed to always know how to encourage Mia.

  “What’s the plan for today, Rainn?”

  “I already turned in the paperwork. Everything seems to be in order. We’re seeing the principal, Carly Andrews. She’ll meet with us first. I’ll then need you to take Mia out while Ms. Andr
ews and I talk in private.”

  They shared a glance, and he knew Geneva was sending him the message that she wished it didn’t have to be that way.

  “They don’t want any surprises.”

  In minutes, the three were in the principal’s office.

  After introductions, Rainn wondered how this woman behind the desk could be taken seriously. She gave the impression of wearing a non-stop happy face, her joy so infectious that Mia reacted as though the meeting was all in fun.

  And the principal liked to talk. “Every child with autism is different—like all children—and here at Sharpe we’ll do our best to make her feel comfortable.”

  He covered Geneva’s hand with his own. The gesture was definitely noticed by the principal, but she fixed her attention on him.

  “She’s mainstreamed, right?” Geneva asked.

  Rainn paid attention to the answer, wishing he had thought to ask such a question.

  “Definitely,” Ms. Andrews responded, glancing at all of them in turn. “And, please, do interrupt whenever you have questions. I’ve got some introductory pointers, probably nothing that you’re unaware of. In order to succeed at school and in the home, there needs to be an open relationship between guardians and teachers. You’ll know right away what the teacher expects. I’ll introduce you to the teacher now, and the aide later, once we know who that is. There will be a time of assessment. Of course, it appears that Mia was well-adjusted and bright in her former school, so that time should be short. But we’ll work with you in developing the individual plan for her daily routine.”

  She paused, looked at the three of them, and continued with a comment for Mia. “If you have questions or wonder about anything, Mia, this is about you. So please, speak up.”

  Mia fidgeted in her seat. “OK.”

  “After our boring business, Mia, we will walk to your classroom and meet your first-grade teacher.”

  “OK.”

  Rainn had only seen Mia look at the principal once through the whole meeting, and that was more at her hair than her face.