The Little Cottage in the Country

by Lottie Phillips

  ‘Nice.’ Anna started to say something else but stopped when she spotted Simon leaning up against the school gates, his eyes on her. ‘Dee, look.’

  Diane turned her head. ‘What the hell?’ She took a step forward but Anna stopped her with her hand.

  ‘No, I’ll deal with it. Can you take Mum home?’

  ‘The twins too?’

  ‘No, I’ll bring them.’

  ‘OK,’ she said slowly, ‘but I’m happy to stay.’

  ‘No,’ Anna said, breaking eye contact with Simon and looking at Diane, ‘I’ll be OK. Thanks for tonight, though. You were awesome. Larry too.’ She smiled. ‘You’ve got a good one there.’

  Diane nodded. ‘Don’t I know it. Right, I’ll prise your mother away from her adoring fans and take her back.’ Diane left and Anna glanced at the gates, but Simon had disappeared.

  Minutes later, she watched Diane send the twins in her direction and usher her mother and Larry towards her car. She caught Anna’s eye and mouthed ‘love you’ over the roof of her Citroen before she got in.

  The twins were now hanging on to either side of Anna.

  ‘Mummy,’ Antonia said, yawning, ‘I want to go home.’

  ‘Me too.’ Freddie nodded.

  ‘Yep, just a second. It’s just that I thought I saw…’ She moved around, keeping her eyes peeled for Simon, but he was nowhere to be seen. ‘OK, let’s go.’

  She fumbled around in her handbag for her car keys, thinking about the relief she would feel when she could take off the towering gold heels and put on her pink, fluffy slippers. But when she looked up, she saw Simon again, now leaning against her car.

  As they approached, he smiled. ‘Hi, guys.’

  ‘Who’s that?’ Antonia said.

  Freddie looked at her. ‘That’s the silly man I told you about. He’s our dad.’

  ‘Oh.’ Antonia nodded.

  ‘Got your email,’ Simon said to Anna. ‘Not sure I’m ready to crawl back under that rock yet.’

  ‘A pity.’ Anna unlocked the car and opened the back door for the twins. They clambered in. ‘Belts, you two.’ Freddie helped his sister with her belt and then did his own up before staring out, with wide eyes, at his father.

  She shut the door. ‘Why do you want to do this, Simon? Is it to spite me?’

  ‘No,’ he shook his head. ‘I want to get to know my children.’

  She nodded. ‘You know, when I saw you last week at the race, my heart ached, but not because I realised how much I missed you or loved you, because I don’t, I really don’t. Not any more. No, my heart ached because it’s my job to protect my children and I love them more than you will ever understand and, when I saw you, I knew you would do this. I knew you would want a piece of what you think is rightfully yours.’

  ‘Well, they are.’

  Anna’s chin started to quiver. ‘That’s the thing, Simon. They’re not property to be owned. I don’t own them and you don’t own them. They must be allowed to do as they please. At first, I was going to fight you in court. Then I realised that, if you’re a decent enough human being…’ She paused. ‘That you will allow them to make their own decisions. Why do we need to put them through all that? We don’t.’

  Simon looked at the twins and back at Anna. ‘So, you’re saying you’ll let me see them?’

  ‘I’m saying, let me talk to them and I’ll ask them what they want. If they say yes, I will let you see them, but if, for any reason, they seem unhappy with that, then I stop it. Stop it all. If they say no, I will not push them because that’s their decision.’

  ‘But,’ Simon said, before sucking in his cheeks and exhaling slowly, ‘they might change their minds. They’re only six, for God’s sake, Anna, so maybe in a few years’ time, they’ll think differently.’

  ‘Five,’ she said quietly.

  ‘Pardon?’ He looked at her.

  ‘They’re five.’ She felt a new wave of sadness hit her. ‘You don’t even know how old they are.’

  Simon bowed his head.

  ‘Anna,’ came a voice behind her, and she turned to see Richard storming up the road. ‘I need to talk to you.’

  ‘Here comes trouble,’ said Simon.

  Richard came to an abrupt halt in front of them. ‘I’ve just spoken to one of your neighbours and find out you’re pregnant? What?’ Spittle formed on his lower lip. ‘The other day, you and your mother are banging on about my seeing someone behind your back and then I find out you’re pregnant?’

  Anna stared at him, lost for words.

  Simon put his hand on Richard’s chest, forcing him to keep his distance from Anna. ‘Back up, mate.’ Then he looked closer. ‘Oh, you’re the guy at the race who gave me Anna’s address. Horatio, wasn’t it?’

  ‘This is Richard, Simon.’ Anna said, her head reeling as she glared at Richard. ‘You gave Simon my address?’

  ‘He told me he was a friend visiting.’ Richard removed Simon’s hand. ‘Who is this buffoon anyway?’

  ‘This is my ex-husband.’

  Simon scowled. ‘I told you who I was. I told you I’m the twins’ father.’

  ‘Oh, did you?’ Richard raised his eyebrows. ‘I don’t remember.’ He looked back at Anna. ‘More to the point, whose child are you carrying?’

  ‘Are you being serious?’ Anna shook her head. ‘I’ve known you for all of about four weeks and you think you can talk to me like this?’

  Simon looked at her. ‘Are you pregnant?’

  She glared at Simon and then at Richard. ‘No, I’m sodding well not.’ Her jaw quivered with anger.

  Freddie knocked on the window. ‘Mummy, I want to go home.’

  Anna drew a deep breath. ‘I can’t believe I’m having this conversation. In front of the children too.’ She prodded Simon in the chest. ‘You can crawl back under your rock and you’ll be lucky if you ever see the children.’ Then she poked Richard in the chest. ‘And you storming over like we’re even in a proper relationship… You can crawl under that very same rock.’

  Simon squared up to Richard. ‘You’re not joining me under my rock.’

  ‘Oh yeah?’ Richard said, puffing out his chest. ‘Let’s just see about that.’

  Their eyes met, their faces inches from each other’s. Anna looked down the road and saw Horatio emerging from the school gates. He delivered a half-smile and then, his facial expression changing to pure panic, started gesturing madly at her. She put her hand up, confused, and gave a small wave back.

  Seconds later, a flash of movement caught her eye and she turned. To her horror, she saw that her car was rolling forward, increasingly faster, down the hill, towards the school entrance. She started to run after it, grasping at thin air as she tried to grab the door handle.

  ‘Oh God,’ she shouted, ‘help me! Help me!’

  Simon and Richard moved alongside her, jostling each other out of the way.

  Anna, her heart pounding, called to Freddie. ‘The handbrake! Pull the handbrake up.’ She was sobbing as she kept losing her grip on the door handle. ‘Help me!’

  Horatio now stood in the car’s path, his body tensed as it looked as if he was prepared to take the impact.

  She shouted wildly to him. ‘What are you doing?’

  As the car hurtled towards him, he waited, his face screwed up, intense with concentration. When the car had reached barely a few feet from where he stood, he rounded the bonnet and yanked the door handle open before sprawling himself across the front seat and shoving the handbrake upwards.

  The car came to a sudden halt. Silence descended on the gathering crowd before the remaining parents and children, who had formed a crowd on the pavement, applauded the spectacle.

  Horatio slithered back out of the car as Anna ran to open the rear door. She climbed in between Freddie and Antonia, pulling them towards her and kissing the tops of their heads over and over again.

  ‘What happened?’ she said, both angry and relieved.

  ‘I played with this,’ Freddie said, grinning
and pointing to the handbrake. ‘It worked the same like when the car went into the chicken house.’

  Anna closed her eyes and slowed her breathing. ‘Don’t ever touch anything like that in the car again. OK?’

  Horatio stuck his head in. ‘Are you guys OK?’

  The twins nodded and Anna smiled gratefully. ‘I am so thankful, Mr Horatio, for what you just did. I told you I was a bad mother.’

  He smiled back. ‘Don’t worry. I’ve had plenty of practice. Jeremy’s always letting the handbrake off.’

  Anna burst into laughter. ‘I will never be able to repay you. That was really,’ she paused, ‘brave.’ Overwhelmed with emotion, she bit down on her trembling lip. ‘Amazing.’

  Simon and Richard appeared on the other side of the car with Mrs Beecham.

  ‘Is everyone OK?’ Mrs Beecham said. ‘Do I need to call an ambulance?’

  Anna shook her head. ‘No, thank you, Mrs Beecham. I think these two just need to go home to bed. They won’t be doing that again, will you, Freddie? Antonia?’

  They shook their heads, smiling. Anna climbed out of the car. She looked at Horatio. ‘I also have to apologise for accusing you of telling Simon here where I live.’ She looked at Richard. ‘Turns out there was some sort of misunderstanding.’

  ‘Don’t worry,’ Horatio said, shutting the rear door and opening the driver’s side for Anna. ‘Just glad you’re OK.’ He closed the door gently and gave a small smile.

  Anna started the engine and drove away slowly. She glimpsed Horatio, Richard and Simon standing side by side, in her rear-view mirror, as they watched her car retreating down the road.

  ‘Mummy,’ Antonia said. ‘Don’t cry.’ She leant forward and handed her a used Barbie tissue off the back seat.

  Anna hadn’t realised she had been and took it gratefully.

  A few minutes later, she said, ‘How would you two like to go back to London?’

  The twins didn’t say anything and she peeped at them over her shoulder. They were fast asleep.

  Eyes Wide Open

  ‘No, you can’t leave,’ Diane wailed at her. ‘Come on, what are you so scared of? I don’t get it.’ She batted at Anna’s hand as Anna tried to put another of her sweaters in the suitcase.

  ‘Come on, Dee. It’s for the best.’ She gently removed Diane’s hand from her arm. ‘I just feel like I thought I could come here and set up this sweet, idealistic life in the country, and all that’s happened so far is I haven’t made any friends. They’re all so cliquey and I just don’t’ fit in.’ She paused, her heart heavy. ‘I’ve just made a fool of myself.’

  ‘But you’ve got me and your mum!’ Diane said. ‘That’s no reason to leave.’

  Anna sighed. ‘Maybe, but you and Larry will have your own life soon, Mum will go back to Bath…’ She wasn’t so sure about this point but ploughed on regardless. ‘And I’m nothing like all the women around here in their perfect houses, with their perfect cars, on the arms of their perfect husbands.’

  Diane sat on the bed, taking Anna’s clothes out of her suitcase as quickly as Anna was putting them in. ‘What? And you think I fit in?’ She chuckled. ‘Look at me? I’m into heavy metal, I wear thick black eyeliner and change my nail colour as often as most people change their underwear. I’m now pregnant and with a guy of twenty-three I barely know, and with no job.’

  Anna sat next to her. ‘Yeah, but your guy is an angel. He adores you. You’ve just proven that you can find love in a month, and get pregnant and engaged to boot.’ She laughed softly. ‘That’s special.’

  ‘Yeah, so why can’t it happen to you?’

  ‘Because I go for men like Richard,’ she paused, ‘and men like Richard treat me like I’m their property. They have no regard for my feelings. I did the same with Simon.’

  ‘Maybe you’re looking in the wrong places.’

  ‘And that’s yet another reason to go back to London.’ Anna stood, resolute. ‘Yes, I’ll travel back today. You and Mum will be fine with the children for a couple of days, while I find a flat.’

  ‘What about Primrose Cottage?’ Diane brought her knees up to her chest. ‘What about this place that I used to think was a dump but which, in fact, is the most homeliest home I’ve ever lived in?’

  Anna smiled. ‘You can live here, with Larry.’ She nodded towards Diane’s tummy. ‘And Advocat, or whatever you decide to call him or her.’

  ‘But Advocat needs her Auntie Anna.’

  ‘Advocat can visit Auntie Anna and the twins.’

  Diane slid off the bed and rushed over to Anna, hugging her. ‘No. You’re my bestie. You can’t do this.’ She held Anna at arm’s length, looking serious. ‘You know, you’re only running because you’re afraid of your feelings.’

  ‘What on earth are you talking about?’ Anna started to fold her jeans into the case and Diane took them back out.

  ‘You keep banging on about not fitting in, about everyone being more perfect than you, about making a fool of yourself.’

  ‘No,’ Anna said firmly. ‘Also, Simon now knows where I live. The twins and I don’t need that sort of aggro and, you know, I actually liked Richard. A lot. But he’s just a moron, like all the others. So, if you think I’m running, it’s only because I don’t need all that in my life again.’

  ‘Oh, and what are you going to do when you meet someone in London and it happens all over again?’

  Anna tilted her head to the side. ‘In London, you can get lost and, if I choose, I can make sure I’m never found again.’

  Diane picked up a pillow and started to pummel it. ‘Oooh, you’re so frustrating. What was it that your aunt said? You can only find love if you open your eyes. Well, Anna, open your eyes. He’s right in front of you.’

  ‘What on earth are you talking about?’ Anna looked at her, bemused and angry at the same time. ‘Diane, I’m leaving. End of.’

  ‘What about Horatio?’

  ‘What about him?’ Anna pulled a face. Her thoughts flitted to the man who had been somewhere in her life since she had arrived at Primrose Cottage.

  ‘Do you have any feelings for him?’

  She thought about the way he had watched her at the talent competition, with a kind of gentle protectiveness, and her heart lifted momentarily. Had she been so blind as to not see he had real feelings for her? Anna then thought about the way he had managed to stop the car, the way he’d stood quietly in the background while Richard and Simon acted so immaturely…

  But who was she kidding? He had never said anything to her.

  Anna’s chest grew tight as she finally spoke unconvincingly. ‘I do not care for Horatio.’

  ‘Well,’ Diane had moved over to the window, ‘you tell him that. You tell him you’re leaving.’

  ‘Why should I do that?’

  ‘Because I rang him and he’s coming up the drive now.’

  ‘What?’ Anna shrieked, racing over to the window and pushing past Diane. ‘Diane, what he did last night was amazing. I told him so. But he’s my half-cousin, I am no way going there.’

  ‘Oh, come on, I’m sure it’s legal,’ Diane said. ‘If not in this country, then you can emigrate somewhere, and Larry, Advocat and I will come too.’

  A knock sounded at the door. ‘Diane, I’m not sure I’ve ever wanted to kill you more.’

  Diane grinned, kissing her on the cheek. ‘What about the time I ran out of dishwasher tablets and squirted Fairy Liquid in your new dishwasher and you had to get the engineer out? Or,’ she paused, ‘what about the time I blew up condoms for the children’s birthday party?’

  Anna nodded. ‘Yeah, they were all pretty bad but this is humongously bad.’

  As Anna made her way down the stairs, she heard Diane call out, ‘Keep your eyes open.’

  Anna wanted to get rid of Horatio by the time the twins returned with her mother. Linda had taken them out shopping and she knew it wouldn’t be long before her mother would realise how hard it was to go shopping with two five-year-olds who had an unheal
thy obsession with sliding around shop floors and hiding under clothes rails.

  She opened the door and Horatio smiled tentatively at her.

  ‘Hi,’ they said in unison.

  ‘Come in,’ Anna said and ushered him into the front room, closing the door behind him. ‘I just want to say…’ She started just as Horatio said, ‘I got Diane’s call and…’

  They both tailed off.

  ‘Yeah, I’m sorry about that. Not sure why she needs to make such a big thing of me leaving.’

  He frowned. ‘Why are you leaving? Is it because you’re pregnant? Are you going back to London to live with the father?’

  ‘Oh, brilliant. You too. No, I am not pregnant. It’s Diane upstairs who’s pregnant and left me at the till with the pregnancy test because she was too embarrassed.’ Anna shrugged. ‘Anyway, I guess it’s not working out like I hoped. So many things have happened. Many embarrassing things, but I can get over that. But what I can’t get over is being made to feel unwelcome by a lot of the other children’s mothers and then by your mother.’

  He frowned. ‘She won’t tell me what she said to you but I apologise on her behalf.’ He looked into her eyes. ‘You haven’t given it long. Not really.’

  ‘Listen, Horatio, I know it hasn’t been long, but I kidded myself when I came here that I could fit in, that I would make this cottage into something even Tom and Barbara would have been proud of.’

  ‘You do fit in. Not everybody gets to go to yoga with Lucinda and Angela.’ He smiled. ‘But why would you want to be like them, anyway?’

  ‘Well, because it would mean my children won’t need expensive Harley Street counselling when they’re older because their mother once ran after a giant baked object down a hill, or because she once dressed up as a member of Abba, or because,’ she said, pulling a face, ‘because she can’t even remember to put the blinking handbrake on and now her son copies her and thinks it’s the best game ever.’

  Horatio laughed lightly. ‘That’s why you’re so great. You do all those things and you do them well, but most importantly, you’re showing your children not to be scared.’