“You’re welcome. Goodnight.” Jenna turned the light off.
“Goodnight.”
Kris was tired, but she couldn’t sleep. Jenna was on her side facing away from her. Kris stared at the ceiling and didn’t move for fear of waking her. After fifteen minutes or so, she heard Jenna sniffle and saw her silhouette shake slightly. She wanted to comfort her, but she didn’t know if Jenna would appreciate it. She knew if she wrapped her arms around her, she would fall for her all over again. She still loved her, but Jenna made it clear those feelings were one-sided.
After the sobs stopped, Kris rolled over onto her side facing the opposite direction. Maybe, if she couldn’t see her, the images of making love to her would stop firing off in rapid sequence in her mind making it impossible to sleep. Jenna rolled over, and she felt her move closer. She tried again to clear her mind and calm her racing heart. Warm breath against the back of her neck sent chills down her spine. She waited with a surge of anticipation for more contact. She craved it with every cell in her body. The last person to touch her was Stacy, and she needed to obliterate that memory the only way she knew how.
She didn’t feel anything else. Maybe she had wanted it so bad, she’d imagined it. She closed her eyes, but there was movement behind her again. No, she wasn’t imagining it this time. Soft lips caressed her neck and a hand snaked over her hip and underneath her shirt. Fingers ran across her stomach and up her ribs, not stopping until they brushed across a nipple. A slight squeeze caused her to moan in pleasure, and she leaned back into the only body she desired. If this was a dream, she never wanted to wake up.
Jenna’s lips found hers, skipping over any tenderness and diving right into a hot passionate kiss brimming with lustful desire. She melted beneath her with her body fitting into Jenna’s curves like it always had, like they hadn’t been separated for months. All the hurt and the pain, the harsh words and the suffering, were forgotten. How could she have ever thought about giving this up and not fighting to keep their relationship alive? It was still alive, and it still had a pulse. She could feel it. It was present in Jenna’s lips and tongue, the fingertips touching her skin, the constant beat and ache between her thighs. It was still alive, which meant there was a chance they would be okay.
She returned Jenna’s kiss with even more intensity. She wanted this for so long. With the separation, this almost felt the same as their first time. This time, however, lacked any awkwardness or hesitation that was present the first time. They both knew what the other liked and needed. She knew all the spots on Jenna that begged to be touched and explored further. She let Jenna control the pace, not wanting to push too fast, but hoping to take it all the way.
Jenna straddled her and ran both hands underneath her shirt. There was no time for teasing as they ran a direct path to her breasts, taking one in each hand. Kris arched her back and moaned as Jenna’s fingers worked her nipples, pinching, squeezing, teasing. She needed more. She grabbed a fistful of Jenna’s shirt and pulled her down on top of her, crushing her lips with her own. Jenna broke the kiss and sat up removing her hands from underneath Kris’s shirt. She grabbed the bottom of hers and lifted it up over her head.
“I’ve missed this so much,” Kris said.
“Show me how much.”
Kris pulled her back down and squeezed Jenna’s breasts together, running her tongue over her hard nipples and dipping into her cleavage. She looked up knowing Jenna was watching her. She ran her teeth across a nipple and flicked her tongue over it, sucking it between her lips, letting it pop back out when she was done. The other one wasn’t left unpunished. She licked from the bottom of her breast all the way to the tip of her nipple before sweeping it back and forth across the tip while watching Jenna’s reaction. Jenna clawed at Kris’s shirt, yanking and pulling until it was on the floor.
“Don’t stop there,” Kris whispered in her ear.
“I didn’t plan on it.”
She raised her hips allowing Jenna to slide her panties down with her fingers, gliding over skin that no one had touched in a very, very long time.
Jenna slipped her thumbs into the waistband of her own panties, but Kris grabbed her hands. “No, let me.”
She pushed Jenna down on the mattress and pushed her legs apart. She dragged her chest and abdomen between them as she made her way up to kiss her again. Her tongue slipped between Jenna’s lips and her breasts covered Jenna’s. Her pelvis moved slow between Jenna’s legs and she felt nails digging into her ass pushing her harder into her.
As bad as she wanted to continue, she needed to know Jenna wanted this. “Are you sure this is okay?” she whispered against Jenna’s cheek.
“Yes, I want this. I want you here, right now.”
“That’s all I needed to hear.”
She slid her hand down between them and over top of Jenna’s panties, relishing in the moan released against her lips, but that didn’t keep her satisfied for long. She needed more. She kissed Jenna’s lips one last time, then her neck, chest, between her breasts and made a straight line down her stomach. When she reached the top of her panties, she sat back on her knees. She slid the tips of her fingers underneath the waistband giving it a gentle tug. As Jenna raised her hips, Kris slid her arms underneath her hips raising them further until Jenna was supporting herself on her shoulders and neck. She threw one of Jenna’s legs over her shoulder, letting the other one fall to the side.
“What are you—”
“Shhh.”
She brushed her nose and lips over the outside of the panties. The moisture greeting her, told her how much Jenna wanted her. Jenna’s tight legs turned to putty as she relaxed. She covered as much area she could with her mouth open wide and then closed it slowly letting her teeth drag across the soaked fabric creating a friction she knew was driving Jenna crazy by the way she buried her face behind her arm.
“Do you like that?” Kris asked.
Jenna nodded and from what Kris could see of her face, she saw her lips curl up into a smile. She slipped her right thumb underneath one side and her ring finger underneath the other side of the thin center strip of fabric. Her hand slipped up and down drawing the material tighter and tighter. Her middle finger ran along the wet crease with just enough pressure to leave Jenna begging for more. She didn’t need to be touched, just having Jenna’s body writhe beneath her touch was enough for her. She pulled the center strip of panties to the side and licked along the exposed inner thigh. Jenna rolled her hips up into her trying to nudge her in the direction she wanted to be touched. Her tongue worked from Jenna’s inner thigh to the soft, delicate skin she had missed. She caressed it with her tongue, moving upwards to the puffy skin above where Jenna needed her. Hands found their way to the back of her head while fingers intertwined in her hair, but she still refused to take direction. She was going to take her time whether Jenna wanted her to or not. She pulled the fabric further to the side hearing stitches tear and fabric rip until the other side was exposed. She licked and sucked the newly exposed skin causing goosebumps to erupt on Jenna’s thighs.
“Please, Kris, please.”
“Don’t worry, I’m going to give it to you. You’ve heard of foreplay before?”
Jenna thrusted her hips towards the ceiling. “Yes, but this is torture.”
“Does that mean you don’t like it?”
“I think the answer to that is staring you in the face.”
“You mean on my face.” Kris ran the tip of her tongue up the wet slit in front of her and back down. Upon reaching the top, Jenna’s low moan turned into a sharp gasp. “Is that what you wanted?”
She pulled Jenna’s panties off before lowering her hips back down to the mattress. Her fingers spread Jenna while her tongue and lips explored her. She went straight to the source letting it coat her tongue while the fingers of her right hand worked Jenna’s clit. She loved watching Jenna respond to her, moving with her and against her. Jenna lifted her head watching, turning Kris on even more. Not only was she feeling
Jenna respond to her, she saw the desire and want in her eyes. She loved it when her eyelids fluttered and she arched her back. Jenna’s heels alternated between digging into her upper back and lower back, and sometimes into the mattress like a mime climbing an invisible wall.
“Come here,” Jenna pleaded.
Kris shook her head no as she flattened her tongue against the swollen clit between her lips. She felt Jenna’s hands trying to pull her up, in contrast to the pelvis grinding beneath her face.
“Kris, come here.”
Kris lifted her head dragging her chin across the sensitive spot. “Not until you do.”
“I need to kiss you. I have to kiss you.”
“Are you sure about that?”
“Mmmm, yes.”
Kris gave in and slid herself up Jenna’s body feeling the wetness leave a streak down her stomach until it mingled with her own moisture. Jenna gave her a brief kiss before licking her chin and lips.
“I told you I needed a kiss.”
“That was more than just a kiss.”
She rolled onto her back and pulled Jenna on top of her with her back against her chest. “I’m not finished with you yet.”
She snaked her hand around over Jenna’s stomach and plunged down. She pulled Jenna further up and Jenna rested her heels on Kris’s knees spreading her legs further apart. Kris gave Jenna’s back a gentle love bite below her shoulder. She continued circling Jenna’s clit with her fingers, enjoying every second of it, but not wanting the moment to end. She was afraid when it did, Jenna might have second-thoughts about their relationship again. Jenna threw her arm around Kris’s neck and drew her in for a kiss that left them both breathless. Their lips barely touched, but each would sneak a flick of their tongue across the other’s lips while the other caught their breath between pants.
“Please, I need this. I need it so bad. I want it. Give it to me.”
Kris let go of everything she had been holding back and varied her rhythm. She felt Jenna’s body tense. She didn’t stop until Jenna’s moan turned into a scream right before her body went limp.
“Are you trying to get us kicked out of here? You were loud tonight,” Kris said.
Jenna rested her head on Kris’s shoulder. “It’s been so long, I couldn’t help it.”
“Oh, I’m not complaining. You better hope they don’t kick us out because there aren’t any more rooms available, remember?”
“That’s the least of my concerns. Right now, you’re my top priority, and I think I owe you an unbelievable orgasm too.”
Kris stopped Jenna’s hand from sliding down further. “No, not tonight.”
“You don’t want me to touch you?”
“Of course, I do. It’s late and you need to rest up for tomorrow. I’ll take a raincheck though.”
Jenna nodded.
“Is that okay? I do plan on cashing that raincheck in, so you better be prepared.”
“You got it.” Jenna gave her a tender kiss and rested her head back down on her shoulder. “I love you.”
“I love you too.” Kris kissed the top of her head and closed her eyes with a smile on her lips.
Chapter Eleven
“Are you sure this is a good idea?” Kris asked.
“I don’t care if it is or not. I want you here with me,” Jenna said.
She took Kris’s hand and pulled her through the heavy doors of the church. The truth was she knew it wasn’t a good idea and that there would be stares and whispers. She didn’t want to make a scene at her grandmother’s funeral. She hoped no one else would either. She gripped Kris’s hand tight as she pulled her down the hallway. Relatives and friends of the family stopped talking and their heads turned one by one to stare at them. There was no doubt her parents hadn’t told anyone about her being a lesbian, much less being in a lesbian relationship. Sure, some had heard the rumors but seeing it for yourself is always different. It hits you right in the gut, wiping out any denial and hope that you refuse to let go of until you’re forced to.
She led Kris through the crowds of whispers and gawks, ashamed to be associated with some of the people they passed. Every now and then she would receive a kind smile, which she would return. It was good to know some people still knew the meaning of family and friends and unconditional love.
After debating where to sit, she sat down behind her parents with Kris beside her. Still holding her hand tight, she rested it in her lap. For a brief instant, she thought about putting a comforting hand on her parents’ shoulders, but she didn’t want to upset them before it started. Her father wiped his eyes with his thumb. He had only cried before with Kim and now with his own mother. He was so good to his mother and so patient. Why couldn’t he be the same way with his own family? What had they ever done to deserve the way he treated them?
Kris gave her hand a reassuring squeeze. She was so happy she didn’t have to go through this alone. Her grandmother meant the world to her and never let her blame herself for Kim’s kidnapping or for what happened after her return. She was the first person Jenna came out to in her family, and she never treated her any different. She was so happy for her and wanted to meet Kris. She knew about their engagement and looked forward to the wedding.
She looked down at the ring she had given Kris five months ago, and a sense of calm rushed over her. How could she have walked out on Kris like that? Kim almost succeeded in taking Kris away forever, but Kris survived. Even after Kim’s death, her own guilt and need to blame someone, anyone but Kim, made her drive a wedge between herself and the only person in her life she loved and couldn’t live without. These past few months apart were miserable. Leaving didn’t accomplish anything. It didn’t bring Kim back. It didn’t change what had happened. It didn’t make her love Kris any less.
Almost every night, she cried herself to sleep, if she was lucky enough to get any sleep. She couldn’t eat either. The only part of her life that benefited was the hospital and her patients. She threw herself into her work, the way she had before she met Kris. She gave people a second chance on life, something they deserved. But didn’t she deserve a second chance too? Didn’t Kris deserve compassion and understanding for the torment she endured?
“I love you,” Jenna whispered with tears in her eyes.
“I love you too.”
Her father’s sister, Bethany, turned around. “Jenna, I didn’t know you were here.” Bethany looked to Kris and nodded. “You must be Kris. I’ve heard so much about you.”
With those words, her father and mother both turned around. Her father took one look at Kris, shook his head, and faced forward again. Her mother stared at Kris and turned around without saying a word.
“Sorry,” Bethany mouthed. She whispered something in her brother’s ear, something he didn’t like.
“No,” her father said. He straightened his shoulders and stared ahead at his mother’s closed casket.
Jenna felt the need to say something or do something, but what? This wasn’t the time or the place. She felt Kris’s other hand sandwiching her hand between hers. The gentle caresses on her knuckles made her calm down a little. Did she really expect any other reaction from them? She closed her eyes and focused on memories of her grandmother. The tears came, and she didn’t try to control them or hold back. It was time to say goodbye, but she wasn’t ready.
It was also time to say goodbye to all the guilt and hostility that was eating her up inside. The time had come to move on, and if that meant leaving people behind because they didn’t approve of her or her future wife, then so be it. Grandma Grace’s soul had been set free, and her parting gift had been bringing Kris back. She was going to hold on to her like her life depended on it and never let her go again.
***
After the burial, Jenna stepped away while Kris talked to Bethany. Her mother and father stood by their car talking. From the way her father shook his head and her mother had her hands on her hips, she knew it wasn’t a pleasant conversation.
Her father saw her ap
proaching and crossed his arms as he glared at her. Her mother followed his gaze.
“I didn’t mean to interrupt, but I just wanted to let you know that Kris and I will meet you back at the house.”
“Oh, no you won’t. You’re not bringing that murderer into our house.” Her father pointed towards Kris who was still talking to his sister. “She will never be welcome in my home.”
Jenna took a deep breath. She didn’t expect them to welcome Kris with open arms, but she hadn’t anticipated this reaction either.
Her mother took a step toward her. “Was that an engagement ring? Are you planning on marrying the person who shot and killed your sister, your twin?”
Jenna shoved her hands deep into her pockets to hide the fact that they were trembling. “Yes, that was an engagement ring. Yes, I am marrying the woman I love. She saved my life and protected her own against Kim.”
Her father pointed at Kris again. “That woman is a murderer. She should be in prison for that. I can’t believe you plan on marrying her. Are you insane?”
“She is not a murderer. I refuse to stand here and listen to you call her that. Kim’s death was an accident. No, you know what? It wasn’t an accident. Kim would be alive today if she hadn’t made the decision to bring a gun into our house. It was Kim’s gun. She is the one who used it to shoot Kris’s best friend, Kris’s neighbor, and ultimately Kris too. Kris did not intentionally shoot Kim.”
Her father didn’t back down. “Your grandmother was devastated over Kim’s death. I blame your lady friend killing Kim for everyone being here today. She sent my mother to her grave too.”
“Don’t you dare blame Kris for Grandma passing away. She loved Kris and me. She accepted our relationship and our love. We had her blessing. Grandma liked to smoke, and she ate whatever she wanted. She had two heart attacks, quadruple bypass surgery, and refused to take her meds regularly. Kris had nothing to do with her heart giving out.”
“What do you know about it?” her father said.
Jenna's Future (Dr. Jenna Harper Series Book 3) Page 11
