“I see.”
“Do you? Do you really see?”
“Yes, I do. You’re afraid to make a commitment. I believe you use your work as an excuse to justify to yourself that you have no time for anyone in your life. That’s easier than risking getting hurt in a relationship.”
“You have it all figured out.”
“No, far from it, but I do know one thing. I’m not perfect. I have faults, and that’s okay. I used to think it wasn’t, that no one could see my flaws and still like me. These past few months I’ve come to realize differently. I have to be with a man who will commit to me one hundred percent. You can’t do that, and I think you’re right that we should end whatever we had between us.”
Andrew straightened, quickly scrambling to conceal the anger that flashed in his eyes. “Good. Then we agree.”
Sadie started for the door, determined to remain in control. “Oh, by the way, Jollie wants Chris to apply for a position in the receiving department when it opens up.”
“I’ll look into it.” His reply was cold.
At the door she paused and said, “I’m gonna ask you again. Have you thought about what you’ll have in, say, ten or twenty years? Will it be enough to satisfy you? What happens when you retire and there is no more work?”
With those questions spoken, Sadie slipped out of the office, feeling Andrew’s penetrating stare shimmer down her back. She had to go back to school for a meeting. Please, Lord, give me the strength to make it through the rest of the day without falling apart. She uttered the prayer over and over as she felt her heart shatter into a thousand pieces.
Chapter Thirteen
Andrew started to knock, hesitated and dropped his arm to his side. Turning away, he walked a few paces down the hall, then stopped and twisted, staring at the door. When Sadie had left his office the day before yesterday, he’d felt as though she had sucked the air from the room and taken it with her. Her questions still rang in his mind, demanding answers he didn’t have. He needed help and had run out of places to go.
The door opened, and Reverend Littleton appeared in the hallway. “Andrew? What brings you to the church?”
Andrew stared at the man, two nights without sleep dulling his mind. He couldn’t get Sadie out of his thoughts, especially the devastation he’d glimpsed in her eyes that last time he’d seen her in his office.
“What’s wrong, my son?”
Andrew flinched. He could remember Tom saying those very words to him when he’d first lived with Tom. Over the two years he’d lived with Tom, he’d learned to put his trust and faith in the man and the Lord. Then Tom had been taken away just as quickly and disastrously as his family, and he’d felt himself floundering for a safety net.
Tunneling his fingers through his tousled hair, Andrew approached the reverend. “I need your help.”
Reverend Littleton stepped to the side. “Come into my office and let’s talk.”
Seated in a comfortable chair across from the older man, Andrew closed his eyes for a moment, gathering his scattered thoughts into a coherent pattern. Finally, at four in the morning, he had come to the conclusion he needed more in his life than what he had. Sadie was right. There was nothing there that would mean anything in the years to come.
Andrew took a deep, cleansing breath. “How do you find your way back to God?”
“Son, I think you’ve taken the first step today by coming here and asking that question.”
“This is an unexpected visit, Andrew. Is something wrong with the union negotiations?”
Andrew remained standing in front of Mr. Wilson’s desk. “No, I’ve come to withdraw my name from consideration for the presidency of IFI.”
“May I ask why?”
“My goals and plans for the future have changed these past few months.”
“They still involve IFI?”
“Yes, but not as its president. I want to start a family.”
Surprise flitted across Mr. Wilson’s features. “Are congratulations in order?”
“I haven’t convinced the lady yet.”
“If I know you, Andrew, that’s only a technicality. Who do you like as the next president?”
Andrew pulled up a chair and sat, more relaxed now that he had told Mr. Wilson his wish. “Charles would be excellent.”
“Would you be willing to take on a different role at IFI?”
“What?” Andrew asked, wary that he would be trading one all-consuming job for another.
“I want to divide your job and expand the special projects part. With you heading that section, someone else can oversee the human resource department. I like this project you’re doing with Cimarron High School and their vocational program. Connected to this position, of course, would be community awareness of IFI here in Cimarron City as well as globally. Image in today’s market is everything. What do you think?”
Andrew shifted, leaning forward, enthusiasm building inside him. “I like it. Tell me more.”
The hairs on the nape of Sadie’s neck tingled. She scanned the gym at the University of Oklahoma, her gaze skipping from Special Olympics participant to coach to spectator. She saw familiar people, but no one staring at her. Still, the sensation someone was looking at her plagued her as she walked with her team toward the court they would play on.
She placed her gym bag on the floor. “Let’s stretch and warm up first.”
The eight team members formed a circle. Chris went into the middle and demonstrated one stretch. Everyone followed his lead. Sadie bent over and touched the floor along with her players. As she straightened, again the feeling someone was staring at her inundated her. She looked from side to side. When she glanced behind her, she saw him.
Andrew smiled at her, nodding his head in greeting.
Shock swept through her. Andrew was dressed in gym shorts and a T-shirt with a whistle around his neck. He would be their referee. Her shock quickly turned to confusion. Why wasn’t he working? Just because it was Saturday didn’t mean it was a day off for him. He had no days off.
Ignoring his heartwarming smile, she focused her attention on the stretches her students were performing. But each time she lunged, reached or twisted, she couldn’t shake the prickly sensation Andrew was following every move she made.
Halfway through the exercises, she slipped away from the circle to confront the man. She marched up to him, fisted her hands on her waist and demanded, “Why are you here?”
“I’m volunteering.”
“Don’t you have work to do or something?” She winced at the panic in her voice and wished he hadn’t heard it. She knew he had. A gleam entered his eyes.
“No. I took the weekend off.”
“Why?”
“To volunteer at the Winter Games for Special Olympics. I thought that was obvious.”
“Nothing about you is obvious. Are you refereeing our game?”
He nodded.
“Then I’m gonna protest.”
“Why?”
“I’m sure this is a conflict of interest.”
“You don’t think I can be fair-minded?”
“I—” She suppressed her retort. “Yes, I guess so.”
“Besides, all the other referees are busy, and they’re shorthanded as it is. I thought you would be happy to see me. You’re the one who convinced me that Special Olympics is a good cause to donate my time to.”
She narrowed her eyes, wishing they could pierce his thick skin. He was enjoying her discomfort at his presence. “You could have volunteered for one of the other sports being played at the winter games.”
“But I know how to play basketball. I thought that was important if I was gonna referee.” He peered over her shoulder at her team. “They have five more minutes before the game starts. I need the captain to call the coin toss.”
“I’ll send Chris over.” Sadie marched to the circle of players, aware of Andrew’s gaze assessing her, and told Chris to meet with Andrew.
Chris’s face lit with a
bright smile. “Mr. Knight is our referee?”
“Yes.”
“That’s great. He’ll get to see me play. I told him about this.”
So that was how Andrew knew about the winter games. Sadie wanted to discover just how much Chris and Andrew had talked about this weekend. Did Andrew mention her? Why was he here? As her thoughts began to run rampant with all the possibilities, she put a halt to the questions. Showing up for one day didn’t mean anything. Special Olympics was a great cause, and she was tickled pink Andrew was giving his time to something other than work. But that was all. One day isn’t a lifetime commitment, she reminded herself as she prepared her team for the start.
The game was excruciatingly slow. The seconds dragged into minutes, and Sadie could hardly keep her mind on her team. Her gaze kept returning to Andrew in the middle of her students, looking as though he was enjoying himself. He appeared relaxed, the tense lines in his face gone.
“Spencer, in?” Donnie tapped her on the shoulder and pointed toward the court.
“Okay, but remember that goal is the Chargers’. Don’t shoot at that basket,” Sadie said, waving toward a hoop.
The score was tied eight to eight with their opponents getting some help from Donnie, who had made a basket for the Chargers. When Donnie ran onto the court, Sadie shouted, “Remember this is our goal.” She pointed to the north end again.
In Donnie’s excitement at getting another chance to play, he rebounded the ball and immediately took a shot at the Chargers’ goal. The ball circled the rim and dropped through the net. Moaning, Sadie buried her face in her hands while their opponents exploded with applause. She thought of taking Donnie out and decided not to. He loved to shoot baskets and was quite good. Maybe he could make a few for them, too.
Two minutes later, the score was eleven to ten in the Chargers’ favor. Andrew blew the whistle, announcing the end of the game. Donnie went up for a shot and made yet another basket for the Chargers. Thankfully this one didn’t count. The team shuffled off the court, their heads hanging. Donnie still stood at the basket, rebounding and shooting.
“Coach, we should have won,” Chris said, throwing a narrow-eyed look toward Donnie.
“Everyone gets to play. You know that, even Donnie. He made five of our baskets.”
“Yeah, and seven for them.”
“Did you enjoy playing?”
“Yes.”
“Then that’s all that counts. We’re here to have fun and make new friends. Now, we have some time before our next game. Why don’t you get some water and rest?”
“Can I have my face painted?”
“We’ll do that later.”
“Good. I want Sooners here.” Chris pointed to his left cheek. “And Cowboys here.” He gestured to the other side of his face.
Sadie laughed, tousling his hair. “Covering all your bases,” she said in reference to the two big universities in the state. Chris was a huge fan of both.
Sadie returned to the court to retrieve Donnie before the next teams played. He didn’t want to leave. Andrew came up behind Sadie and caught the ball as it bounced off the rim. Donnie frowned at him.
“Sorry, buddy. The next game is gonna start soon. You can shoot some baskets later.”
Donnie stared at the ball clutched in Andrew’s grasp, then stomped off to sit on the sideline. Sadie started to follow her student.
“I’m not refereeing this next game. I have a break. Can we talk?”
His question halted her progress toward the sideline. She didn’t turn and face him. She didn’t want to look into his eyes and find her resolve to get on with her life melting. “I’d rather not. I have strategies to form. We have to win all the rest of our games to win the tournament.”
“You should have no problem winning if you just leave Donnie under your goal, tell him not to move and get the ball to him. Problem solved.”
She heard the snap of his fingers and whirled, her anger rising. “And your specialty is solving problems.”
“Yes—except my own. I haven’t done a very good job there.”
She placed her fisted hands on her waist. “And what problems do you have? I thought you had your life all planned out five years in advance.”
The sound of balls slapping against the floor and hitting the backboard, the cheers when a person made a basket, the murmurs of voices in the crowd filled the air. Scanning the area, Sadie saw the next teams coming onto the court her students had been playing on, but none of that mattered. Her whole being focused on Andrew several feet away.
“A big one.” He shortened the distance between them. “I’ve made a mess of my life. I’ve discovered the plans I made don’t fit the new me.”
Her eyes widened. “The new you?”
He grasped her arm. “Can we go somewhere less public to talk?”
Again she took in her surroundings, her students sitting with their families drinking water and talking. “I can’t go far. We have another game soon.”
“How about outside in the corridor?”
“Andrew—”
“Please, Sadie, this is important.”
The beat of her heart picked up speed. Hope began to blossom in her, and she had to stamp it down before she got hurt any more than she already was. “Fine. I can spare ten minutes.”
She followed him from the gym and down the corridor until he found a less crowded area. The sound of people cheering could still be heard, but Sadie felt as though the rest of the world had disappeared with only her and Andrew left. Her emotions lay bare and exposed. But as she recalled the life he’d chosen, she shored up her defenses and faced him in the alcove.
“What is it you need to tell me?” she asked, hearing the steel thread running through her words. Dear Lord, I have to be strong. I can’t deal with another rejection.
He drew in a deep breath, glanced away for a few seconds, then directed his look at her, an intensity in his gaze. “I was wrong. I thought I could live without you. I can’t.”
Sadie raised her hand to stop him from saying another word. “Don’t, Andrew. You were right from the beginning. It won’t work for us. We want different things from life.”
“No, we don’t. I’d convinced myself I didn’t need anyone to make me happy. That work was a good substitute. Then you came along and forced me to examine my life. I didn’t like what I saw, what I’d become. I want what Tom had taught me was important—family, God.”
Tears burned in her eyes. She’d longed to hear those words ever since she’d met him. Still, years of holding her emotions inside for fear of being rejected kept her quiet.
“When Tom died so unexpectedly, in my grief and anger, I turned away from the Lord, from all that Tom had shown me. Give me a chance to prove I can make a commitment, Sadie. I love you and want to spend the rest of my life proving to you what a good husband and father I can be.”
Tears streamed down her face. Emotions clogged her throat, making it impossible to say anything.
Andrew caressed her cheek with his forefinger, brushing her tears away. “I met with Mr. Wilson and withdrew my name from consideration for the presidency. I made it clear to him that my priorities have changed.” His touch lingered, one hand cupping her face while the other clasped her arm to bring her closer. “Say something.”
Sadie swallowed hard. “I’m afraid, Andrew. Work has driven you for years.”
He brought his other hand up to frame her face. “Have faith in me, Sadie. People can change if they want it bad enough, and I want this very bad.”
She inhaled then exhaled slowly. “I don’t think I can do anything else. I love you, Andrew Knight. God has taught me the importance of faith and giving people second chances. Yes, I’ll marry you.”
A smile transformed his serious expression. He feathered his lips across hers, then deepened the kiss while winding his arms around her. “You’ll learn one thing about me hasn’t changed. When I set my mind to do something, I do it. We will have a good life, Sadie Spencer.”
Epilogue
With her arms folded over her chest, Sadie leaned against the wall in the hotel ballroom and watched the next bachelor step onto the stage. The door opened near her. She turned to see who had entered.
“Where’s that man of yours?” Jollie asked, slipping into the place next to Sadie along the back wall. “The least he could do is return to the scene of his downfall.”
Sadie laughed. “I hope he doesn’t see it that way.” With a quick look at the door, she saw another person enter the ballroom, but that man wasn’t Andrew, either. “He’s late.”
“He’s probably at work.” Jollie cocked her head to the side. “On second thought, he’s usually left before me these past few months. You’ve definitely changed that man. I never thought I would see the day he didn’t burn the midnight oil.”
“How’s Chris doing?”
“He’s working out great. I’m glad he transferred to my department. The people love seeing him come to work. He brightens the place.”
Again someone pushed the door open, and Sadie glanced toward it. A smile lit her face when she spied Andrew in the entrance to the ballroom. She waved, and he headed toward her.
Jollie leaned toward her. “I should be angry you took the most eligible bachelor off the auction block. But after all the men he persuaded to donate their time to this charity auction, I can’t complain.”
“Neither can I.” Sadie slipped her hand in Andrew’s.
“It’s nice to see you, Jollie.”
“I’d better get back to the table I’m manning. See you two later.”
“Sorry I’m late. I got detained longer than I thought at the church with the appropriation committee meeting, then the contractor called and needed to see me about our house.”
His whispered words fanned her neck in warm waves. She shivered, and he brought his hands up to pull her against him. “Is there a problem with the house?”
“Not anymore. Ready to leave?”
Family for Keeps & Sadie's Hero Page 36
