More of You: A Confessions of the Heart Stand-Alone Novel

by Jackson, A. L.

  Cutting my lights, I slowly started to ease the car down the drive. I came to a stop halfway down the lane.

  Swallowing hard, I reached into the glove box and pulled out my gun, ensured it was loaded before I stepped out into the humid night and tucked it into my jeans at the small of my back.

  The soles of my shoes crunched beneath me as I hastened through the night. The barest shot of relief hit me when I saw Felix’s cruiser parked at the circular drive in front of the porch.

  I should turn around.

  Go.

  But that feeling wouldn’t release me.

  All around, bugs trilled and branches rustled.

  The quietest howl that screamed.

  Unsettled.

  Distressed.

  I swallowed around the lump that grew heavy at the base of my throat and eased around Felix’s car.

  I peered up at the house.

  All the windows were blacked out. The thickest kind of night echoed back.

  There was something about it that felt off.

  Wrong.

  Like the peace of the place had been stripped from the walls.

  Anxiety pulsed. Mixed with the driving, pulsing urge to race across the porch and bust down the door.

  The door.

  It struck me right then, and my gaze flew that way when I realized what it was that had made everything feel off.

  It was darkened, obscured by the sway of the shadows that moved across the covered porch. But when I looked closely, I could see that it was sitting open a crack.

  Terror cinched down across my chest.

  A vise.

  Constricting.

  Without another thought, I was moving, trying to keep my footsteps as quiet as possible as I crept up the porch steps and across the planks.

  I craned my ear, listening.

  Silence echoed back.

  A dark kind of silence. Something grim and wicked and evil riding on the dense, dense night. Like I could taste it, pull it into the well of my lungs.

  Violence skated my skin and twisted through my insides.

  I’d told Faith I would do whatever it took to keep her and Bailey safe.

  I’d meant it.

  I’d never meant it more than right then when I realized I could scent it.

  Malice.

  Rage seeped from my flesh and dripped from my pores. I’d take out anything, anyone, who would hurt them.

  I eased open the door another inch, cringing as it creaked on its hinges. I bit down on my lip like it might keep the sound contained.

  The only thing there was the stilled vacancy of the room.

  I stepped inside, eyes rushing around to take in the stillness.

  Where the fuck was Felix?

  Terror rode my spine.

  What if I was too late? What if Felix hadn’t been enough to protect them?

  Heart slamming against my ribs, I inched deeper into the darkened house, the old antiques big and imposing, as imposing as the silence that reverberated back.

  Quieting my feet, I eased up the sweeping staircase, moving as fast as I could without making a sound.

  I went straight for Bailey’s door.

  Somehow, I already knew it’d be sitting wide open, her bed empty, covers a mess where they’d been dragged to the floor.

  Sweat drenched my forehead and dripped down my back.

  No.

  No. No. No.

  Blinking through the staggering pain, I pushed right back out, and did the same to Faith’s room, eyes sweeping the place, knowing it would be the same.

  Emptiness bled through the door. Pooled on the floor. The picture frame that had remained on her nightstand had been shattered on the floor.

  I started to rush out, to run for the door, to grab for my phone as I did.

  Then I heard it.

  A rustle from upstairs.

  A small bang.

  A barely heard moan.

  But it hit my spirit so loudly I could have sworn Faith was screaming it in my ear.

  I need you, Jace. I need you in a way I’ve never needed anyone.

  Little fingers digging into my neck.

  You sway aww the dragons?

  Pulse crashing through my veins, I eased up the narrow staircase that led to the third floor, not knowing what to expect but preparing for the worst. I paused only long enough to send Mack a text.

  Me: Get to Faith’s now. Bring backup.

  I inched the rest of the way up the steps, cringing every time the old wood groaned, praying I could make it up without being noticed.

  If the girls and Felix weren’t alone up there, it would be me against who knew how many. The last thing I wanted for them to know was that I was coming.

  The banging grew louder the higher I got, and I eased up into the open space of the rambling third-floor above.

  Dust and boxes and old furniture sat everywhere. It’d been cluttered the last time I’d been up here, but since then, it’d been torn apart.

  Ransacked.

  The barest light glowed from a corner at the very back, and my heart clanged, the desperate clawing of the beast when I found Faith huddled on a worn couch on the other side of the expansive room, rocking Bailey in her arms.

  Her expression was terror-stricken, her energy bowed and twisted and tied. Stuck on this moment.

  Life in the hands of the bastard who raged in front of her, gun clenched in his hand.

  Felix.

  What the fuck was happening?

  Confusion spun while horror climbed into my spirit.

  Felix.

  My mind flashed with all the threats. The fact someone had been able to get in and out without being noticed. Almost like they belonged.

  Felix.

  He’d been right there under our noses this whole time.

  Watching her.

  Waiting.

  Motherfucker.

  How could I have let this happen?

  That lead had been nothing but bait to lure me away. And I’d left Faith right in the palm of his hand.

  Rage blistered and blew. I didn’t know how he couldn’t feel the storm whip through the room, the lashes that struck in the stagnant air.

  Thunder.

  Swore, I felt a bolt of lightning strike through the center of me.

  A stake to my body.

  “Where the fuck is it, you stupid bitch?” Felix ranted, angling down toward her where she did her best to hide in plain sight, her hand over the back of Bailey’s head like she could protect her from the words he spat.

  “I told you . . . I . . . I don’t know what you’re talkin’ about. I don’t know anything about Joseph’s business.”

  Roaring, Felix whirled to the side and kicked a huge cardboard box. Glass shattered when it crashed onto the ground, contents spilling out.

  Bailey screamed, and her mother held her tighter.

  While I almost came right out of my skin.

  No one would hurt them.

  No one.

  Not ever.

  I’d die before I let that happen.

  Felix was back in Faith’s face. “Give up the bullshit innocent act. I know you know. I gave you plenty of chances to come clean. Warning after warning. I didn’t want it to come to this, but I’m out of time. Just the same as you. Now tell me where that piece of shit hid it before I beat it out of you.”

  Anger surged. So intense I almost went running across the room.

  But I held back, eyes scanning, trying to figure out the best way to lure the asshole away.

  Faith whimpered. “I told you, I don’t know anythin’. I swear. I’d tell you if I did. Please . . . let us go. I won’t say anythin’.”

  Malicious laughter rolled from him. “You’re just as greedy as that little fucker was, aren’t you? This big ol’ house, all for yourself. Isn’t that right?”

  “No,” she wheezed. “Please . . . I beg you . . . you can have anything. Just let my baby go.”

  He reached out and touched Bailey’
s hair, his voice turning menacingly soft. “She’s always been the answer, hasn’t she, Faith? Do I need to take it out on her to get the answer out of you?”

  A sob wrenched from Faith’s throat, and there was nothing I could do.

  My body vibrated with the need to destroy. To take out any threat.

  Gun aimed at his back, I stepped out of the shadows. “I’d think twice about that.”

  Forty-Five

  Faith

  Oh, God, Jace was here.

  He was here.

  Maybe he’d heard me screaming, after all.

  Because there he was, coming around an armoire that sat to the side of the stairs, gun in his hand and vengeance in his eyes.

  Felix whirled around, his own gun lifting. “I was wondering when you’d show your dumb ass back here. Was hoping we’d be long gone by then. I guess plans have to change sometimes, don’t they?”

  I still couldn’t process that it was Felix. That the man had somehow inserted himself in our lives and I hadn’t suspected anything was wrong.

  Courtney hadn’t known.

  Oh goodness, Courtney.

  My best friend.

  I had no idea if she was fine. If she was home sleeping and had no clue or if this vile man had hurt her, too.

  Jace laughed. Laughed a sound unlike any I’d ever heard him make before.

  Cruel and every bit as savage as the man who’d held my daughter and me hostage for the last two hours. “Yeah, you’re right. Sometimes plans change. Because the last thing I expected to have to do tonight is take you out. Yet, here I am.”

  Felix’s nostrils flared, and he took a step in Jace’s direction. It was as if they both were magnets. Drawn to the flames that were gonna burn all of us alive.

  Because I could feel it.

  Something cruel and depraved pulsing through the air. Sucking out the oxygen. Leaving the gut feeling that none of us were gonna walk away from this unscathed.

  I wanted to beg Jace to go. The only thing I wanted was for him to take Bailey with him.

  Protect her and provide for her.

  Because Joseph’s debt had come due, and I wasn’t going to let Bailey be the cost.

  I’d pay it. I’d pay it if it meant my baby would be okay.

  “Jace,” I whispered.

  For the barest moment, those copper eyes flashed to me.

  But in that glance, I heard a million pleas.

  Don’t move.

  Don’t say anything.

  Let me pay.

  Let me pay.

  It is my fault.

  I owe you this.

  And I wanted to take back every single thing I’d accused him of earlier.

  Tell him I understood.

  That whatever Joseph had done, he’d done himself. He’d brought all this on us. Put us in danger.

  Felix erased another inch of space between them. And I saw it, Jace easing back, almost imperceptibly, but I knew.

  I knew he was luring the man away.

  Protecting us the way he’d always promised he would.

  “Joseph has something that is mine,” Felix said. “I’m not leaving here without it. I want that log.”

  A log.

  That was what he’d been looking for all this time? Breaking into my house and terrorizing us for some stupid log I hadn’t even known existed?

  Felix had been enraged when he hadn’t found it in the safe. He’d been sure I’d been hiding it all along . . . that I’d already removed it and had hidden it somewhere else in the house.

  He’d been ranting, spouting a bunch of names that I wanted to purge from my mind.

  Names of people I had thought had been Joseph’s friends who were nothing but a disgusting family tree of organized crime.

  Felix thought I was still trying to protect Joseph.

  Never.

  Hate glinted in Jace’s eyes. “Putting a bullet through his head wasn’t enough?”

  “He was responsible for my uncle being killed. He stole from our family. He knew the rules. He broke them. His grace period had run out.”

  “Then what do Faith and Bailey have to do with it?”

  Felix shrugged. “Collateral damage, I suppose. I was sure she knew where it was, that she was protecting that traitor, but I’m beginning to think she was telling the truth. It’s too late now, though, isn’t it?”

  He said all of this as if none of our lives mattered.

  All of us expendable. Greed the greatest game.

  Sickness clawed at my insides, and sitting there, I wanted to weep.

  Weep at the cruelness of it all.

  “She doesn’t know anything. Just . . . put down the gun, let them go, and you and I will find that log.”

  “Right . . . I’m just going to let them walk out of here. She knows everything, and even if she doesn’t, I can’t take that chance.”

  “You don’t let them go, and you’re going to be the one who isn’t walking out of here.”

  Felix sneered, a hateful twist of his lips. “Awful sure of yourself, don’t you think? Should have taken you out the second you rolled up here like a knight in shining armor sent to save the day. There’s no saving, Jace.”

  Jace?

  Jace just cracked a smile that was all taunt.

  He was windin’ Felix up.

  Stoking his anger.

  Aiming it at himself.

  “You’re right. It’s over. Over for you.”

  Needles and knives. I could feel Jace driving them into Felix’s flesh. The way rage rippled through Felix, his pinpoint focus narrowing in on Jace.

  But Jace’s . . . Jace’s might have been more intense. His drive greater than anything I’d ever witnessed or seen.

  Fear tumbled through the center of me.

  A different kind.

  It was the terror of losing him all over again.

  It rang with finality.

  I could see it written all over him.

  What he was willing to give. What he was gettin’ ready to do.

  “That’s where you’re wrong. Steven is dead. I find that log? End this threat to our family? I take his place. Taking out that traitor Joseph was only a bonus. Now . . . back the fuck up. Me and your girlfriend here are going to find that log. She cooperates, and maybe, I’ll let the little girl go.”

  Oh God, that was the only thing I wanted. For Bailey to be safe.

  Desperately, I looked around as if it might conjure that log he was so desperate for.

  Maybe . . . maybe I could use it to get us free. The only thing inside the smaller safe had been a stack of letters.

  Felix had scattered them onto the floor like garbage, shooting into a rage before I’d even been able to figure out what they were.

  He’d dragged me downstairs to get Bailey before he’d dragged us right back up here and had begun to tear apart the third floor.

  Screaming at me to tell him where it was.

  A log.

  That’s what this had been all about?

  As if I’d protect that over my daughter.

  “You aren’t going anywhere,” Jace said, “and sure as hell not with Faith or Bailey. You want to walk out of here? Let Mack continue to hunt you down? Be my guest. But you aren’t hurting either of them.”

  I could see it in the firm clench of Jace’s jaw. In the way his finger flexed on the trigger of his gun.

  The two of them had started to dance around the other, moving slowly as they began to circle like hawks.

  Predators after their own prey.

  Both of them beasts. Coming from the same ugly world.

  But that was where the similarities ended, their hearts so strikingly different.

  I felt the burn of Jace’s.

  The bolt of light.

  The streak of love.

  And I knew . . . I knew I couldn’t just sit there. He was getting ready to go down in a blaze. I had to do somethin’.

  If Felix had been responsible for Joseph’s death, no doubt Felix wasn’t
going to think twice about killin’ any of us. I shook when I realize it’d probably been his intention all along.

  Get the log, and then he was goin’ to get rid of us the same way as he’d gotten rid of Joseph.

  I couldn’t allow that to happen.

  With none of their attention on me, I quietly eased off the couch and onto my knees.

  In the lapping shadows, I ran the palm of my hand over Bailey’s mouth, my eyes begging her, silently praying she’d understand I was asking her not to make a sound.

  Silently telling her how much I loved her.

  That she was my world.

  I hid her in a crevice between the couch and a massive dresser, and I pressed the softest kiss to the top of her head. A promise that I would always love her. No matter what happened.

  My little thing hugged my neck, sending her own silent plea.

  But somehow her heart was beating steady. Filled up with that understanding that was too great for someone her age. The child always too keen.

  Pressing my lips to her chubby cheek, I breathed her in, held her little spirit tight to my heart.

  Then I gathered the little courage I had and crawled back out, peering around the couch only far enough to see the two men still circling each other.

  “You should know better than to think any of this works like that. Joseph killed my uncle, and he was holding that log over our heads like it was going to save him. Nothing would have. Just like there isn’t anything that is going to save you or her.”

  Felix was in the middle of the room. Seething. The stench of hate coming off him was so great, I knew there was no chance any of us were making it out of there if someone didn’t stop him.

  The vile man stood like a fortress between Jace and Bailey and me.

  The only thing coming between us.

  I had to do something.

  Anything.

  Anything to distract Felix so Jace could have a shot at saving us.

  I wrapped my hand around the base of a tall glass lamp that had been shoved to the floor.

  Everything shook, as devotion and fear warred.

  The latter was so strong it turned my stomach and soured on my tongue.

  But I needed to be brave. Brave the way Jace had always been. Willing to sacrifice myself for the ones I loved.

  It was the rawest, barest form of it.

  Giving it all.

  Slowly pushing to standing, I emerged out of the shadows with the lamp held high. I ran for Felix, praying I could make a difference.