Compass

by Jeanne McDonald

  Melanie flipped on the blinker and switched lanes. “You always jump into things head first, never considering the consequences of your actions until it’s too late. You’re going to regret not giving yourself time to settle.”

  If only that were true. Where Ryan was concerned she always considered the consequences of her actions. It was that reason alone she never told him how she truly felt. Time had passed, but seeing his face again reminded her of the feelings that lost little girl once felt.

  “I gave myself the weekend, Mom. What more do you want?” What she didn’t want to explain to her mother was she knew if she’d given herself a week to move in, then she’d be forced to spend some of that time with Miles and Kellie. It was bad enough that her father was picking her up from the airport. She had no desire to see him beyond that or to endure a big “family” dinner. Not yet, anyway.

  “Absolutely nothing,” Melanie relented. It was a moot point anyway. She reached out and turned the dial to increase the radio volume, filling the void with pop music.

  Alexis flopped her head back against the headrest again and continued to observe the sights as they exited the interstate, forking into JFK International Airport. Planes were flying low to the ground, both taking off and landing. She watched as one eased up into the sky, heading west from the airport and wondered where it was traveling.

  As they approached the departures gate entrance, anticipation mounted inside Alexis. Her fear of flying never subsided and she now had a four-hour flight ahead of her. Dramamine was packed in her trusty messenger bag, just in case, and she’d booked her flight with the assurance of a window seat.

  Melanie parked the car behind a row of cabs and helped Alexis unload her luggage. After checking in her two bags, she stood on the sidewalk with her mom, shuffling her feet. The weight of the moment bore down on Alexis. She was leaving her life behind, her friends, the city she loved, but most of all her mother. The last time she made a move like this she lost Ryan, but at least her mother was there to help her adapt. Now, as a grown woman, she was facing the world alone.

  Alexis wrapped the leather strap of her messenger bag across her chest. Melanie gripped her daughter’s shoulders, forcing Alexis to look her in the eye. “I’m going to be fine, as will you. This is merely a new experience. One you deserve. Don’t second guess this, Lexi. Embrace it.”

  “I know,” Alexis whispered.

  “Miles is still picking you up, right?”

  Alexis nodded, swallowing down the lump in her throat. Tears burned behind her eyes. This was goodbye. Not forever, but fifteen hundred miles was no laughing matter. She couldn’t simply pop into a cab and go see her mother anymore. They’d promised to Skype and email, text and call, but it wasn’t the same.

  “Good, good. Well, I guess this it then.”

  Alexis wrapped her arms around Melanie’s neck. The two women, locked in a warm embrace, cared nothing about the on goings around them. They rocked back and forth, holding tight to one another, saying goodbye to the girl and welcoming the woman that was Doctor Alexis York.

  Sometime later, Alexis found herself standing in line at airport security, humming her favorite tune. She slipped off her sneakers and pulled her bag over her head, resting them both in the plastic bins provided. A man behind her leaned forward, grabbing a bin for his articles. “How’s it going?” he asked, his voice rough and sensual.

  Alexis stopped humming. She cocked her head to the side, catching a glimpse of the man. He was tall, with wild dark hair and a winning smile. His suit suggested he was a businessman and Alexis got a vibe that he was well aware of how attractive he was. She gave him a quick grin but it disappeared when her eyes caught a glimpse of a golden band around a very important finger.

  Yep. Another bastard. Go figure.

  “It’s going,” she stated, keeping her tone flat and aloof.

  The man tossed his polished black shoes and briefcase in a plastic bin, ramming it up against hers, causing her bin to buckle forward. “Where you heading?”

  “Home,” she clipped. It felt strange calling Texas that, but she figured now was as good of time as any to start.

  “And where might that be?”

  “Texas.”

  They stepped forward, following their belongings through the line.

  “Where in Texas?” the warm, husky tenor of his voice smoldered and oozed with sexual desire, which caused the hairs on the back of her neck to stand on end. She forced herself not to shiver in disgust.

  God, this asshole’s persistent!

  “The DFW area.”

  The man clapped and rubbed his hands together. The sound was so loud that Alexis jumped. “Talk about my lucky day. That’s where I’m heading. Maybe we could meet up for dinner one night. You could show me the sights of the great state.”

  A very frustrated Alexis turned around and propped her hands on her hips. She gave the man her best smile, batting her eyelashes. “Sure. I’d love to.”

  A huge smile exploded across the man’s face. “Fantastic!”

  She tilted her head, her lips twitching. “Only one question. Will your wife be joining us?”

  All color drained from the man’s face. His smile faltered and Alexis thrilled in the way his throat moved when he swallowed. “I, uh...well, um,” he stuttered, rubbing the back of his neck.

  “Look, pal. The next time you want to pick a girl up in an airport, take that off.” She pointed to the wedding ring on the man’s finger. “Better yet, don’t try to pick a girl up in the airport or anywhere else for that matter. Go home and be a man. Love the woman who actually committed herself to your sorry ass. How about that?”

  An older woman, standing behind the want-to-be heartthrob, snorted in laughter at Alexis’ outburst. She covered her mouth with her wrinkled hand, her cheeks turning a light shade of pink. Her silver hair was parted down the middle and pulled into a bun at the back of her neck. She wore reading glasses that sat on the tip of her nose. Her eyes were hazy blue, like glass that bubbled. She wore a faded calico dress with a thin cardigan over it, buttoned at her neck.

  Alexis gave the woman a quick wink and turned on her heel to face the front of the line again.

  “Boarding pass and identification please,” the heavyset female security officer requested as Alexis approached the front of the line. She handed the TSA official her boarding pass and license and waited while they scanned her belongings and verified her identity.

  When the agent returned her paperwork to her, she leaned in a little closer, her broad face expanding in a twisted grin. “Thank you for telling that sleazeball off,” she hissed. “It’s nice to see decency in action.”

  “My pleasure,” Alexis snickered and walked through the metal detector.

  “Have a safe and pleasant flight.” The agent flicked her fingers for the slimeball to hand over his identification. He still appeared green from his encounter with Alexis, which made the whole encounter worth it to her.

  “Thanks.” Alexis grabbed her shoes and bag from the end of the conveyor belt. She perched herself on one foot, sliding her shoe back on then proceeded to complete the same process with the other foot. With shoes in place, she flopped her bag over her head, wrapping it across her chest and proceeded to her departure gate where she would wait to travel to her new home.

  The echo of his shoes against the tiled floor pounded in Ryan’s ears. For a man in such good shape, he felt the complete opposite with the way his lungs strained for air. He was never late. Ever. And today, for the first time in his life, Ryan had overslept. Most of the night he’d tossed and turned, his mind never shutting down, but instead it was filled with memories of Alexis York. When he finally found slumber, he managed to sleep through his alarm and made himself late for work.

  After an eleven day stretch, Ryan was on his way home. He always enjoyed his visits to New York City, but he still preferred the warmth of the south.

  He hooked his finger in his collar, opening his airways. The muscles in his le
gs burned. Not only had he overslept but he’d missed his morning workout. Now he was running without stretching. This was going to be a craptastic day. He could feel it.

  Why does JFK have to be so massive? he griped to himself.

  Ryan weaved in and out of the crowd, growing more and more frustrated. Last night a ghost from his past reappeared. He couldn’t count how many times he’d searched for Alexis York online with absolutely no success in finding her. He’d given up locating the girl he once called his best friend, pretty certain the reason he couldn’t find her was because she’d married some well-to-do New Yorker and was living the highlife she deserved.

  When the Facebook request appeared on his phone, Ryan thought he was dreaming. After all this time, she’d found him. He poured over the few pictures she’d posted of herself. There was one of her in a lab coat and scrubs, captioned, “Last day of rounds,” that he fell in love with. Her long, dark, chestnut hair hung in waves around her slender shoulders and her caramel colored eyes glistened with excitement. The girl he once knew had grown up, and Lord help him, she was even more gorgeous than he remembered.

  He’d almost messaged her when he realized she still lived in New York. All he could think about was catching up with her, but a post on her wall stopped him. She was moving. Where to, he didn’t know. She’d neglected to include that information in her post, but he didn’t feel right in bothering her when she was probably busy. Instead, he decided to wait until he got home to contact her. Maybe then they could schedule time to meet up sometime.

  The sight of his gate made him slow his pace and relax a little. As he approached the counter, he heard a small voice ring out, “Mommy, look. A pilot.” He stopped and turned in search of the small voice. The admiration of children was one of his favorite parts of being a pilot. He loved their little smiles and the way they bubbled with excitement. He was already late, so what did it matter if he took a moment for a child. It wasn’t as if the plane could leave without him.

  A little girl in a bright yellow sundress and pigtails gleamed up at him. Her mother patted her on the head and smiled at Ryan. He approached the family. “Is it all right if I…?” he trailed off, his eyes silently requesting the mother’s approval to engage with the child. She gave him a single nod and he knelt down to make himself eye level with the little girl. “What’s your name?” he asked.

  “Carin,” she stated with pride. “Carin Ross.”

  Ryan extended his hand to her. She accepted his hand, shaking it hard and abrupt. “Not so hard, Care,” her mother scolded.

  “Nah, she’s got a great handshake.” He casted a discrete smile to the little girl’s mother, who seemingly relaxed at Ryan’s response. “It’s nice to meet you, Carin. Where're you flying to today?”

  “Virginia. We’re going to see my daddy.”

  “Is that so? Well, you tell your daddy I said hello.”

  “I can’t. Daddy’s dead.” The girl dropped her eyes. A frown replaced her once bright smile. Her little hands tugged at the waist of her dress as she swayed back and forth.

  Ryan’s heart sank in his chest. He glanced up at the mother’s face, her eyes swimming with tears. “I’m so sorry for your loss,” he stated, sorrow and respect coloring his timbre.

  “He died fighting for what he believed in,” she stated, her voice filled with tears but her words strong and clear.

  “Army?”

  “Marines.”

  Ryan gave her a quick nod. During college, he’d joined the Air Guard Reserves to help pay for his tuition. He was never called up for active duty, but he had the utmost respect for those who were. He gave Carin’s shoulder a gentle squeeze. “You’re daddy was a brave man. You remember that.”

  Carin met Ryan’s gaze. “He’s a hero,” she heralded.

  “Yes, he is. And so are you.” Ryan stood up, and saluted Carin and her mother.

  Ms. Ross straightened up, tears streamed down her cheeks. No further words were exchanged. They didn’t need to be. His salute was an honor in the likes of the Ross family. Ryan reached into his carry-on and pulled out his extra uniform hat he always had with him. He placed it on Carin’s head with a smile. With a click of his heels, in a military fashion, he turned from the Ross family and made his way to the departure gate.

  At the door of the jet bridge, a young ticket agent swiped a tear from her eye. She gave Ryan a smile and opened the door for him, not saying a single word. Once the door closed behind him, Ryan raced down the bridge to the awaiting aircraft. When he reached the door, Makenna Davis, the chief purser, stood waiting for him with a cup of coffee and a smile. “About time you showed up for work, Fisher.” She glanced over her shoulder toward the cockpit and announced, “Captain, our straggler has arrived.”

  Ryan groaned, shaking his head. “Don’t even start.”

  “Start what?” Makenna teased, gracing him with a wily expression. “I can’t remember the last time you were late. Or have you ever been late?”

  “Never!” Kix called out from the cockpit.

  Ryan sniffed, cutting his eyes to Kix and biting his tongue. He removed his hat and exchanged it and his luggage for the cup for coffee. Makenna giggled, patting him on the back. “Oh, buck up. It happens to the best of us,” she noted, picking up his bag and placing it in the captain’s luggage compartment.

  “Not to me,” he groused.

  “You’re human. Give yourself some slack every once in awhile.”

  Ryan slipped into the cockpit, taking his seat to the right of the captain. Captain Kix Jones smirked, his eyes cutting to Ryan. “I want details.”

  “Huh?” Ryan muttered behind the lip of his coffee cup.

  Kix dropped the preflight checklist clipboard in his lap and stared at Ryan with the most incredulous look on his face. Ryan knew exactly what Kix believed had caused Ryan’s unusual tardiness, because it was something that had happened to Kix more times than Ryan could count. Kix was what one might call the perpetual bachelor. He’d been married once, but being in the air proved to be a bit more challenging for him in the monogamy department.

  Many nights, Ryan found himself at the hotel bar watching Kix at work with the ladies. It almost had become a sport to keep score on how many women Kix could pick up. He often wondered what it was that attracted women to the captain. Kix was in his mid-forties; slightly balding, sandy brown hair with gray peppered through it, pale blue eyes, and a small gut that hung over his pants.

  Ryan once had the unfortunate circumstance of seeing Kix in the locker room. After that experience, he was sure the captain had stopped developing at the ripe age of fourteen. There was no way it could be the size of his package that attracted women. This left him with only one conclusion: either it was true what they said and size didn’t matter, or that man had to have one talented tongue.

  “Oh, c’mon, kid. Just one juicy little detail.”

  “There are no details. I overslept. That’s it,” Ryan grumbled, swiping the preflight checklist from Kix. He took another swig from his coffee and set it aside.

  “Gah!” Kix snarled. “You’re too young for there to be no details.”

  “That’s it?” Ryan repeated, this time forming a question.

  He gave Ryan a nonchalant shrug and started back to work. “Anyone else, I would’ve called them a liar. But you...meh. When you say you overslept. You overslept.”

  Ryan rubbed his jaw and glanced over the checklist. “Am I really that predictable?”

  Makenna stuck her head into the cockpit. “Not predictable. Dependable.” She gave Ryan a wink and disappeared again.

  Kix let out a boisterous laugh. “Thanks, Kenna!”

  “Anytime!” she shouted back.

  The two men set to work, preparing for the flight. As they worked, Ryan’s mind wandered back to Alexis. It was true his only reason for being late was lack of sleep, but he hadn’t been completely forthcoming about the nature of his insomnia. While it had been many, many years since he had last seen Alexis York, not a day
went by where he didn’t think of her. He’d always hated how they lost touch.

  They’d promised to call once a week, because long distance calls weren’t cheap. And they’d kept that promise for some time. Ryan had even taken on a part-time job as a busboy to pay for their weekly calls. He loved talking to her about her new life in New York and always kept her in the loop about the on goings in Edenton. But slowly the calls moved from once a week to twice a month, then to once a month. Then there were no calls, only the occasional letter or email. And soon, even those disappeared. He blamed no one. Time and distance played its toll on their friendship.

  After high school he moved to Florida for college. Between school and the Air Guard, Ryan had little time for much of anything. He’d been to so many places and seen so many sights. London, Paris, and Riyadh, were just a few stops along his journey. Little did anyone know, there was a box of postcards, all made out to Alexis, at the top of his closet at home. It had become a sort of tradition with him. Each new city, each new country, he picked up a postcard for her. It didn’t matter if he didn’t know where to mail them. This had been his way of keeping her in his heart, always.

  Ryan scratched the top of his head, his ink pen dangling from his lips. He glanced over the checklist twice, initialed it and handed it back over to Kix for him to do the same. Ryan was a stickler for detail. Safety was key to him and it was one of the reasons why every captain that flew with him loved him. Nothing got past Ryan.

  By this point, passengers had started to board the plane. It was almost time for takeoff and no matter how many times he flew, Ryan always felt a twinge of excitement before the plane lifted into the air. He loved the feel of the controls at his fingertips and couldn’t wait for the day he’d become captain.

  “Hey, guys,” Makenna addressed the two pilots as she entered the cockpit. Her jet black hair draped over her shoulder like a dark veil and her dark blue eyes peered behind her cat-eye glasses. Around her neck dangled a red scarf. It was against airline dress code, but no one said anything to her about it. Makenna was a tenured flight attendant and damn good at her job. Pilots fought to have her on their flights and there was no way any of them would complain about something as insignificant as a scarf.