Probe

by Douglas E Roff

  Noki said, “I want to stay, and I want to go. I’m scared to do either. And I know I can’t do both.”

  “Then stay. Stay for the people who love you, who want you to be in our lives. Stay for the crazy and insane life you have begun with us. Stay because we all want you to be here with us, together, as we begin this journey. Let the deck play out with this new set of possibilities until we all get to understand this life and ourselves better.”

  Alana and Misti were surprised at what they heard from Adam. They had expected something, just not what they just heard.

  Who was this guy anyway? Misti and Alana looked at each other and winked. “He is an actual girl!”

  ***

  “So, returning to the topic of what you ladies have decided, what have you decided?”

  “Well, nothing really, but we do have a few things we’d like to decide with you. Ready?

  “Excellent! Sure. Go!”

  “First are sleeping and bedroom arrangements. Noki wants to have you throughout the pregnancy and I agree. So too does Alana.”

  “Yes, I agree. Is there a catch? You seem to be way too happy with my agreement.”

  “Nope. Just that Alana and I both have caveats.”

  “I knew it.”

  “Hold onto your panties, mister. I want alone time too and Noki is fine with that. So, does Alana but that’s more of a combo deal. She wants to work through the mind thingy with you and master some of it if she can. And she wants some alone time too.”

  “Greedy girl!”

  “So! At least I know what I want!”

  “Noki wants to continue the mind thingy and she knows that’s going to take a lot of time, if you are willing.”

  “I am.”

  “Alana and I want to bunk in the other downstairs bedroom. All of us agree to help out and no one gets possessive, jealous or insane. I want to explore the mind thingy too. I don’t understand how I could have missed everything that Noki and Alana experienced already, but maybe you do. Do you?”

  “Not for certain but I have a working hypothesis.”

  “Workwise, you will be working with Alana and me separately on different projects, as well as your Mom and Pops on theirs. Noki will be working with me and your Dad. Edmund will be working with Mom and Pops, and to a lesser extent, Tawney and Marcus.”

  “Not Alana?”

  “No need,” said Alana.

  Misti continued, “Now, your Dad hasn’t said that he approves of us, meaning you and me, doing field work with Rod and Cindy. But I will insist and so will you. With your Dad, of course. I have a real live prospect for us, and Rod and Cindy have agreed so long as we prep for it properly. I’ll explain later.”

  “You’ve spoken to Rod and Cindy?”

  “Yes. They’re back this weekend. We can talk then, and they can meet Alana and Noki.”

  “There’s more?”

  “One more.”

  “What’s that?”

  “Noki wants a poker night. All the family invited.”

  “Strip poker?”

  “If it’s strip, that’ll just be here and just with us. Otherwise, we’ll see what kind of poker face Agustin really has.”

  “Watch out for Mom and Dad. They cheat.”

  “Tell me something I didn’t already know.”

  ***

  A couple of hours later, Noki and Adam announced they were going for a walk. Evening strolls they intended to have every night.

  “Want some company?” Asked Misti. Alana was thinking the same.

  “Yes, but not tonight. I want a stroll with Noki all to myself. Get our exercise and commune with my son. Have to warn him about Aunt Misti and Aunt Alana.”

  “Oh, like that’s going to help,” said, Alana. “You and the boy have no chance, mister.”

  “We’ll see. But for now, I’m off with my girl.”

  Misti felt a little twinge of … something. She was the one who raised the ‘no jealousy’ rule with Noki and Alana, yet it was she who felt, just for an instant, that it was she who should be strolling with Adam. The tinge of possessiveness passed, as she and Alana watched the pair begin their walk down the gravel road.

  Alana watched them together, guessing how Misti might feel. As she did, Adam stopped and got down on both knees in front of Noki, feeling her belly. Then he said something to his son, kissed him, and stood up. Adam and Noki held hands and walked together like newlyweds away from the house.

  “He’s going to be a great Dad, you know.” Alana said to Misti. “He’s kind. I’m surprised more women didn’t fall in love with him somewhere along the way.”

  “Just Hannah. I think Vera might want a go or two with my husband, too. She’s a bit hard to figure but then I’ll leave her to you.”

  Misti giggled at the thought, but Alana thought she might be serious. Misti was a new kind of creature; one she didn’t know had ever before inhabited planet Earth. That Misti was first and foremost in Adam’s mind was unaltered by events. These two, she thought, were meant for each other; the rest of womankind, Alana and Noki included, were important and, in his own way, he loved them both. But they weren’t Misti and could never fill the void that would be left if something ever happened to her.

  Alana said, “You planning kids too? I never asked.”

  “Yeah. A bunch, if I can. Adam says he’s seen our kids. Seven. He’s delusional but it’s part and parcel of why I love him. Adam is still new to me every day. Men, well they never surprise me. Predictable organisms and I’m not sure why God created them. Seriously, why do women need them?”

  “Aside from the obvious?”

  “Aside from that. But Adam. He’s a guy, I know. But I think he’s something else too. Just don’t know what yet. I guess we shuffle the deck with him as the joker and we see where we all come out.”

  Misti paused, as if her mind was somewhere else. “And you? Kids ever?”

  “Yeah, me too. You mind?”

  “Mind what?”

  “Mind if Adam is my baby daddy? A couple anyway.”

  “Nope. Just don’t say anything too soon. That boy will get a big swelled head. And I mean the one on his shoulders.”

  They laughed at that till they cried.

  Adam had already told Misti that Alana would bear him three special children, all girls.

  But what did he really know? This was becoming weird even for Misti.

  Actually, she was good with that.

  Chapter 44

  The days and weeks since their return to Barrows Bay rolled on and the family slowly began to settle in to a new rhythm. Maria still was being stubborn and petulant about the situation and neither Adam nor any in the family seemed to have any influence on her. Rod and Cindy had returned, were introduced to Alana and Noki and given a full update of the events that transpired from the Hawaii plane flight through the disagreeable situation with Maria.

  Neither Cindy nor Rod had any issues whatsoever around the events; each believed Adam wholeheartedly and had no difficulty believing in his experiences with either Noki or Alana. In fact, knowing what they did about Adam, they would have been surprised at any explanation other than the ones given. That Maria didn’t believe her own son, especially Adam, was the most difficult item to accept. And that Maria was at war with Agustin boggled their minds.

  Rod and Cindy queried whether, with the Gens as a reality out there, was Adam’s story any more incredible? Hardly, they both thought.

  Both made pilgrimages to see Maria, alone and together, as well to Cindy’s parents. Mark and Julia asked to be left out of the debacle, as they had no stake in the outcome. Both were interested in the “mind thingy” and began to suspect that Adam’s difficult and troubled childhood could only be understood in the context of his incredible story. Mark’s antipathy toward both Edward and Adam was thus tempered; he soon began to see them in an entirely new light.

  Mark and Julia also mentioned that Adam had swung by se
veral times to talk quietly with them about a possible move from Barrows Bay to the Manor. At first, they thought he was joking. But by the third time they shared coffee at their home, they knew he wasn’t. He asked them to speak to Rod and Cindy and suspend any thoughts or motivations that were not 100% driven by their shared love of the girls. When Rod and Cindy both expressed that this change was also their wish, Mark began inquiring into the prospect of retirement. It would be an abrupt change and moving to England was foreboding. They were happy Canadians and loved Vancouver Island and Barrows Bay. Did they even have hockey in England?

  But it was when Cindy told them the girls might no longer be safe in Barrows that they agreed to consider the move more seriously.

  Mark said, “It would be a lot easier for mother and me to make a decision if we knew what that danger was. You’re asking a lot and I have no idea why. With all the new security around here, it seems as though we’re safer now than ever before.”

  Rod explained, “If the level of danger had remained the same, I would agree. But with events unfolding as they have, the danger level has risen faster than our ability to keep everyone safe. The only way we can all be safe here is to make this Fortress Barrows Bay. I know you would never want that; what we love about our town is that it’s quiet and mostly ignored. That’s the situation; none of us will ever be safe again until this situation is resolved.”

  “Which is what, son? I’m still lost.”

  “Which, at present, isn’t for me to say. But you are right, if we are asking you to do this, you have every right to know why. Let me talk to Edward and Adam and get their approval. Maybe we can all have dinner here and we can talk after the girls go to bed.”

  Julia said, “Then, dinner it is.”

  ***

  Dinner was at Adam and Misti’s the next night with Agustin and Maria babysitting the girls. It was time for Mark and Julia to meet Noki and Alana and for them to learn what everyone did, why and where they fit into the scheme of things.

  The entire family was there minus the babysitters; the evening wasn’t entirely free from skepticism.

  The best they could get from Mark and Julia, with their narrow band of belief, was a suspension of their disbelief. The story of the Gens Collective, and Adam’s “mind thingy”, was still outside the realm of the possible for them. But they accepted it as fact that the rest of the family did believe in these stories. They too, like Maria, had a great deal of difficulty accepting the living arrangements with Alana and Noki. But, Edmund spoke up in their defense and Mark thought, man to man, that if Edmund was good with it, so was he. Mark believed it wasn’t for him to judge, so he would refrain from doing so.

  Getting comfortable with it was a different story entirely. That would take time and he, like everyone else, was willing to allow the passage of time to decide matters. Things would either be as predicted, or not.

  One more piece fell into place that evening.

  Noki and Adam had gone into Victoria earlier in the day to see a pediatrician for their first sonogram.

  It was a boy.

  ***

  The evening walks turned out to be a family outing that brought peace to the warring and disbelieving factions. Since the family dinner from which Maria had been banned, Adam and Noki added Alana and Misti to the group stroll. Not long afterward, Edward and Bethy joined in, followed by Rod, Cindy and the girls. Once they strolled by Mark and Julia’s, the grandparents didn’t wish to be left out, so the evening walk became more of a flash mob.

  Agustin, who detested being away from his Lab for any reason that was not family, eventually joined in to get to know Alana and Noki better. It didn’t hurt that he especially enjoyed holding hands with his grandchildren and fussing over them. Nobody minded, especially the girls.

  They walked and stopped, picnicked whenever and had dinner in the middle of the soccer field whenever the mood struck. Alana and Adam did most of the cooking, a treat for the older ladies and Misti. They even did barbeque, which Adam and Alana detested, but which made Mark feel like a contributor. Of course, Alana and Adam did all the prep and all the cleanup but still it was Mark trying to be helpful as much as he could. Praise for his efforts was lavish.

  All in all, the “evening walk” had become an inadvertent and spectacular success.

  Over the weeks, Alana became very close with both Bethy and Agustin during their early evening jaunts. Edward began inviting Alana down to Bethy and Edward’s home for morning coffee, which Alana occasionally enjoyed as a nice way to ease into the day. Bethy particularly enjoyed Alana’s quick wit and edgy humor. Alana was an overall joy to be around and Bethy felt a special kinship with the girl with the troubled past. The two sometimes walked alone during the day, allowing Alana another female ear about her sexual assault, the incident in Hawaii and her subsequent road to healing. The pain had mostly vanished, but the fear of still being in the world with the man who promised to finish the job was still able to terrify. While Alana knew intellectually that she was safe, the mind works in odd ways. The residue of fear remained like a stubborn stain that wouldn’t wash out.

  More interesting and awkward was Alana’s burgeoning relationship with Agustin who, like Bethy, found Alana to be easy to talk to and wickedly funny. Agustin invited Alana over to his Lab, where they hung out for hours on end and talked through many of his daily issues in science. This wasn’t her background; nonetheless, she had a keen mind and a refreshing way of looking at a problem. One day when Alana showed up at the doorstep, she found that Agustin had installed a recliner in his Lab, so she could stay longer and think in quiet, just like him. Agustin, never a chatty Cathy, became quite chatty, trading barbs and razor-sharp remarks, a talent he never realized he had. Alana encouraged Agustin to verbalize his thoughts more to family; she felt his kindness and attitude of genuine tolerance should be shared and should be allowed to influence the family positively.

  He did.

  To his great surprise, everyone paid rapt attention. None were more surprised to see this reversal in attitude than Adam and Rod. Both mentioned to Alana that they never knew about the inner guy that had been awakened in Pops.

  The journey to family for Noki was very different. In her own family, there had been little talk and even fewer outward displays of love and affection. That everyone was chatty and touchy feely in her new family was, at first, a little disconcerting. She hung out mostly with Adam and Misti but eventually became fast friends with Edmund, who loved his own daughter immensely and held special affection for his pregnant new friend. Edmund had experience with what the young women faced; he too had faced difficulties earlier in life.

  Things had happened quickly in his daughter’s life, too quickly he thought. But that Alana was healing due to the incident with Adam, and that they continued their “mind thingy” almost as therapy, he had little to complain about. Years of psychotherapy and psychotropic drugs had done little. One evening with Adam and her world had changed.

  So, had Edmund’s.

  Edmund was emotionally and psychologically more like Noki. Noki was quiet and introspective; an observer in a family of chatterboxes and extroverts. Edmund never had experienced this much effusion of emotion before; an adjustment was definitely in order. He discussed his need for adaptation with Noki, the only soul present who he believed truly understood his feelings. He found Noki a calming and measured influence and her vulnerability worthy of his time and attention. Edmund also felt protective; he came to believe that Noki needed him. Needed his love, his friendship, and his support.

  Edmund didn’t know Maria well. In fact, he had not really come to know her personally at all. He worked with both Maria and Agustin on their engineering/physics projects but found Maria somewhat cold and sadly judgmental.

  One day, while working with both Maria and Agustin on a new device for detecting a Gens, Edmund concluded the day by telling Maria that one day soon the youngsters, Mark and Julia, and the girls would be gone. Off to
live in England at the Manor for their safety and protection.

  Did she really want to leave things as they were now?

  He told her that both Misti and Adam loved her immensely and were both puzzled by her reticence and coldness. Adam, he suggested, wasn’t asking Maria for approval of his choices, only to respect them. As for truth, Edmund remarked that Adam seemed incapable of lying to her. It hurt Adam deeply that Maria would even suggest he was doing so now.

  Adam, from what he understood, was nothing like his father. And his struggle with family secrets and his insistence on openness and transparency meant many things. And Misti had changed him too. Changed the family dynamic. It was happening again; Edmund understood that. Perhaps this was simply too much too soon for Maria to absorb.

  The story that Adam and Alana both shared with him about the experience in Hawaii was beyond his ability to comprehend. But Edmund certainly believed his child. The proof of it all, for him, was in how Alana had healed since then. And though her choices about living arrangements might make him uneasy, he accepted his daughter’s decisions as her own. Beyond love, he trusted her to do the right thing. It had led them here to Barrows Bay, to a very odd collection of characters that was rapidly becoming family.

  He was certain that it could only be for the best. Edmund himself was very happy and felt more alive and fulfilled than ever before. He too had been freed from the life his daughter had been forced to endure.

  Perhaps Maria should consider relenting and believing her son.

  “Your family loves you and misses you. Everyone wants you back. I believe you can be a big influence on Noki; she deserves your love and acceptance. You’re a mom; she’s about to become one. You share a bond, an affinity. She needs your love. Besides, your grandson is on his way. Just as Adam predicted.”