Redeem

by Janice M. Whiteaker

  Was she saying what he thought?

  “I’d be happy to check in on you and the girls.” He fought the urge to ask Beth what exactly she meant. And how soon he could come back. “Does it bother you living this far out?”

  Her face fell almost imperceptibly. “No. I’ve always lived out of the way. My last house was even more isolated than this one.”

  House was a toned down way to refer to the home Beth lived in when she was married to Rich. “It was in the middle of the woods, right?” He’d done the inspections on the mini-mansion when it was built. The building was more than impressive. Custom work everywhere. A huge garage. A front door that cost more than his car.

  “Yeah.” Beth shook her head at the floor. “I hated that damn house.”

  Don was taken aback. “Really? I remember it being beautiful.”

  Beth sighed and leaned back against the counter, her body moving away from his making him want to move along with her. “It wasn’t the house’s fault.”

  “Oh.” Don stood quietly, unsure how much he could ask.

  And how much he wanted to know.

  She didn’t give him the choice. “The house was just another thing. Another lie to cover up the way things were. The way he was.” Beth closed her eyes, her lips drawing tight into a thin line. “Sorry. I just—”

  He couldn’t stop himself from moving back in close and tipping her chin up, his hand resting gently along her jaw, forcing her to look at him. “Don’t apologize.”

  She blinked and swallowed hard, her throat rippling under his fingers.

  He softened his voice. “Please.”

  Beth raked her teeth across the fullness of her bottom lip but he refused to let himself stare at anything other than her eyes. He wanted to say she could tell him anything. He wanted to listen to all she was willing to give him. He wanted not just the physical closeness he was managing to steal this very second.

  He wanted more.

  Beth’s breath caught.

  “Mommy! Mister Don has chocolate in his pocket.”

  Looks like his time for dreaming was up again.

  ****

  Don pulled Beth’s door shut behind him, leaving her and the girls happily polishing off the chocolate bars he grabbed on his way over this morning. Shaking his head, he skipped down the front steps, digging his car keys from his pocket.

  That went nothing like expected and Don wasn’t quite sure what to make of it. It would probably be in his best interest not to make anything of it. Unfortunately, he had a history of doing things that weren’t in his best interest.

  But what could it hurt to imagine, just a little more, what a life with Beth and her girls in it could be like?

  A car door shut, yanking Don’s attention away from the only topic it wanted to focus on lately. Thomas standing in Beth’s driveway looking at him, brows drawn together in confusion brought the reality of the situation crashing down around Don.

  “Hey Don. What are you doing here?” Thomas didn’t sound upset but his words felt like an accusation.

  Like he was doing something wrong. And maybe he was.

  Don pointed at Beth’s car. “Beth had a flat and I came over to fix it so she didn’t have to worry about it.”

  Thomas walked toward him. “That was nice of you man.” He rested his hand on the side of Beth’s van and squinted up at Don. “How did you know she had a flat?”

  Don swallowed at the guilt tightening his throat. He was such a selfish bastard and now Beth would suffer for it. Thomas was his friend. Hell, maybe the best friend he had, and they’d worked through their issues. But everyone had their limits.

  “Wait.” Thomas pointed his way. Don could see Beth’s brother-in-law connecting the dots and his heart sank. “Were you the one who was shoveling her driveway?”

  There was nothing to say, no way to explain himself that would protect her from being associated with him. No matter what he said Thomas would come to the only conclusion that made sense given his history with women. Thomas’ included. “Yeah.”

  “Oh.” Thomas stood staring at the newly plugged tire on Beth’s van. “So, are you guys…” He moved his hands back and forth. “Getting to know each other?” There was an excessive amount of questioning in his voice. Like he couldn’t believe that might be the case, but what other explanation was there.

  “No. Not like that.” Don shook his head and told his friend, and himself, the cold hard truth he’d almost forgotten today. “I just wanted to help. I know things have to be hard for her.”

  “I think she’s doing okay.” Thomas tucked his hands in his pockets. “Beth’s a tough girl.”

  Don nodded. “I better get going. I’ll see you tomorrow?”

  “Yeah. I gotta pick up the wife’s slack.” He grinned at Don.

  Don tried to smile back and gave Thomas a quick wave before jogging to his car, refusing to look back at the house where he’d had some of the best memories of his life, new and old, as he drove away. His chest tightened as he thought about what people would say about Beth if they knew he was there.

  Maybe his time for making memories in that house should be over.

  Maybe this was the kick in the pants he needed. A dose of the truth he knew, but wanted to pretend he couldn’t see.

  There was nothing for him here in McCordsville, and as much as it sucked, that meant it was time to move on. Try to find the most happiness a man like him was ever meant to have. And maybe that was living near his sisters and getting to watch them thrive. Be happy.

  By the time he pulled up in front of the trailer, Don knew what had to be done. He didn’t like it, but sometimes you had to do what was best for everyone else and suck it up.

  Tara was sitting on his mom’s bed brushing her shoulder length hair when he stepped inside. Every other Sunday before she left, his youngest baby sister helped his mother take a bath, washed her hair and blew it dry. He crept into the room to watch as she chatted quietly about school and her friends.

  The room smelled of lavender with a faint acetone undertone. “It smells nice in here.”

  Tara wiggled her pale blonde eyebrows at him. “It’s mom. I bought her some new lotion.” His sister reached down and gently raised their mother’s right hand. “And I polished her nails. We match.” Tara held up her own hand to show him the bright pink tipping her and their mother’s fingers.

  “I hope you’re gonna leave whatever I’ll need for when that has to come off.” He gave her a grin. “Otherwise I’ll have to try to sand it off.”

  Tara rolled her eyes. “You would.” She scooted off the bed and helped her mother back to the recliner. “It should still be okay until Jill comes next weekend.” She passed into the living room giving him a sly look. “How was your day? You were gone for a while.”

  “I was just helping a friend with a flat tire.” Don pulled their mother’s door closed and followed Tara to the dining room table where her computer was set up with a stack of folders and papers beside it. “Did you get a lot done?”

  She sat down at her makeshift workstation and flipped through the top few pages. “I actually did. I can’t wait to be finished with all this.” She eyed him. “I bet you can’t either since you insist on footing the bill.”

  Don sat down in the chair next to her, his knees almost hitting hers in the small space. “Not something you need to worry about.”

  “You know what I can’t figure out? Why no one has snapped you up?” Her eyes moved slowly from the computer screen to land squarely on him. She was only his half-sister and fifteen years younger than he was, but Tara knew him well. Well enough to be suspicious about where he was all day.

  He decided to nip it in the bud. “When you have time could you email me that job listing you found?”

  Her eyelashes nearly reached her brows in surprise. “Really?” She smiled so wide he could see all her perfectly straight teeth, even the molars. It was one of the few things he had to thank their mother for. She’d passed on a perfect set o
f teeth to all three of her kids.

  “I just want to check it out.” He crossed his arms and leaned back in the chair, the aged piece creaking under his weight. “I should at least look into all the options.”

  Tara leapt from her chair and wrapped her arms around his neck, squeezing him tight. “Donnie I’m so excited. I just want you to be happy too and I don’t see how you can be happy here.”

  “I am happy. But I want to do what’s best for everyone.” He glanced at their mother’s closed door. “Maybe mom would be happier somewhere different. With more people around.”

  He knew that wasn’t true. The doctors told him many times she was in her own world and would never come back out of it, but he needed to start a pile of reasons it made the most sense to leave.

  Especially if it was going to stand up to the one reason he wished he had to make him stay.

  ****

  “Mommy we have to pre-heat the oven first.” Kate stood in front of the base line electric stove at their assigned work station in the classroom kitchen at the rec center.

  “Really?” Beth looked around the room at the other parents and children. “Are you sure?”

  Kate pressed the buttons on the stove. “The lady said it.” She looked at their recipe card and then back at the numbers she’d punched in. “She said if you don’t your stuff will burn on the bottom.”

  That explained a lot.

  “Okay.” Beth tried not to panic as she watched the moms and dads around her coaching their kids through the recipe. She peeked over Kate’s shoulder and read the recipe along with her daughter. “So next we spray our pan.” Beth looked at Kate. “Right?”

  “Right.” Kate nodded matter of factly, the bun at the top of her head bouncing.

  Beth picked up the non-stick spray and popped off the cap, gently shaking the can. “Do you want to do this?” She held it out to Kate.

  Kate shrugged. “Okay.” She carefully sprayed, not holding the can too close. “The teacher said to make sure you get it in all the corners.”

  Beth watched intently wishing she’d been able to pay more attention when the instructor was giving out directions. Of course they probably assumed the parents knew what was going on, so spending the first ten minutes of class filling out the safety permissions and information sheets wouldn’t be an issue. And it looked like it wasn’t. At least not for anyone else.

  “Now we start mixing.” Kate climbed up on the stool set in front of the stainless steel counter covering their ten square feet of workspace. She set the recipe down and together, they worked through it. Their cake made it in the oven ten minutes after everyone else started their homemade salsa, but the important thing was it made it in.

  Kate wiped her batter covered fingers on the apron the rec center provided each student with. “I don’t like salsa.”

  Shit. She had to keep Kate on board with this. They were signed up for three weeks of classes and if Kate lost interest that would mean Beth would be on her own. “But we will learn how to use the blender if we make the salsa and do you know what else you can make in a blender?”

  “What?”

  “Milkshakes.” Beth held her breath hoping she’d been able to sell the head chef on salsa making.

  Kate sighed. “Alright.”

  The salsa was much easier than Beth expected. Drop some pre-chopped veggies and seasonings in and pulse it until it’s the thickness you like. She could make this no problem.

  Too bad salsa didn’t count as a meal.

  Beth looked up and noticed everyone else was at their sinks. “I think now we clean up a little.” She looked down at Kate. “Do you want to rest while I do that?”

  Kate flopped down to sit on her stool, chin on hands, elbows on knees. “I’m so tired already. Is this almost done?”

  Beth turned on the faucet, squeezing in some of the small bottle of dish liquid sitting on back ledge. While the sink filled she squatted down beside her older daughter. “We are almost done. I appreciate you doing this with me so much.” She lowered her voice. “Mommy really needs the help.”

  Kate giggled. “Yeah you do.”

  Beth tickled her daughter’s ribs. “Stinker. Come on. Let’s do this.”

  Forty-five minutes later, Beth and Kate left the rec center with their leftover salsa, a still-warm cake and their stomachs full of cheese quesadilla.

  “I liked the cheese tacos.” Kate buckled herself into her booster seat as Beth tucked their food at her daughter’s feet.

  “Me too. We’ll have to make them for Liza.” Beth buckled in. “I bet she’ll like them too.”

  “And milkshakes?”

  Beth looked into her rearview as she pulled out of the darkened parking lot. “I think I can do that.” It was just basically ice cream salsa, dump stuff in and blend it up. “We can do it this weekend.”

  Kate was still listing possible milkshake ingredients when they stepped into Paul and Nancy’s house ten minutes later.

  “How did it go?” Nancy looked at Beth cautiously. “Better than the cookies?”

  Beth laughed. “Better than the cookies.” She’d told Nancy the story about burning the best cookies in the world, with one exception. As far as Nancy knew they ended up in the trash instead of in the hands of a man who was slowly making his way from fantasy to reality.

  “Yeah! I knew you girls would do great.” Nancy leaned down until she was eye level with Kate. “What did you make?”

  “Everything.” Kate flopped down on the couch. “Can I watch cartoons?”

  Nancy flipped on the television and looked at Beth.” I think you wore her out.”

  Beth slid off her coat and hung it on the rack behind her. “She’s not lying. She really did do most of the work.” Beth wandered toward the kitchen. “But it turns out I’m pretty good with a blender.”

  Nancy laughed and followed Beth to the kitchen. She leaned in and dropped a kiss on the top of Paul’s head as she passed where he sat at the dining table, facing off Liza in what appeared to be a heated game of checkers.

  Beth smiled at the show of affection. It was encouraging to see Nancy in a happy, healthy relationship. Especially since their situations were so similar. Then again, her mother-in-law waited thirty long, lonely years for it.

  Ugh.

  Nancy leaned against the counter beside Beth. “What did you find out about the Levi situation?”

  Beth blew out a frustrated breath. “There’s no one else willing or able to take him so if his mother is out of the picture he goes into foster care.”

  The whole thing was so damn frustrating. This sweet little boy was caught between two terrible options. Being with his mother the addict or going to live with a foster family, and based on stories she’d heard that could be the worse of the two. “I just don’t understand how no one can take him. He is the sweetest thing and it scares the hell out of me that he might end up in a strange place with strange people who won’t take any better care of him.”

  Nancy stood quietly, but after knowing her for so many years, Beth could tell her mother-in-law had something to say. “What are you thinking?”

  Nancy looked into the room where the girls were completely otherwise occupied. “If he’s as sweet as you say, I’m wondering why you wouldn’t think about taking him.”

  She had. A lot.

  But like other things she thought about a lot, her current situation wasn’t going to do her any favors.

  “I’m a broke single-mother with two other children. I can’t imagine for a second they would consider me an option.”

  Nancy held one finger up. “I wouldn’t be too sure. First, you’re not really broke. You have a great job and can pay your bills.” She pointed at herself. “Second, you have a strong support system and that has to count for something.” Nancy was so serious, so sure sounding. “I think if you can take him you should.” Her eyes dropped. “I wish it was something I’d been able to do.”

  Beth’s stomach clenched. She knew of only one person Nanc
y could be referring to. There was one way to find out. “You mean Don?”

  Nancy nodded slowly. “I wish there was something I could have done to help him. He was the sweetest little boy. So very grateful.” Nancy sighed. “Then as he got old enough to realize how unfair his life was, he became angry.” Her voice trailed off.

  She smiled softly. “But it seems he’s back to his old sweet self.” She patted Beth’s arm as she left the kitchen. “But I don’t need to tell you that do I?”

  ELEVEN

  “What do you think?” Paul looked up at the exposed rafters.

  “I know I don’t think that’s a skylight.” Don squinted , trying to see just how much of the roof was missing at the soffit line. “How bad do you think that is?”

  Paul laughed deeply beside him. “I’m not getting’ up there to find out.”

  Don stepped back into the kitchen of the four bedroom brick ranch he’d stumbled across online. “I think it would be a lot of work, but the potential payoff is pretty high if you keep your costs in check.” The house had a nice floor plan and considering most of it was already in a dumpster in the driveway, it would be easy to open up the main living area for a more modern style.

  Paul nodded as he followed behind Don. The two men did another lap through the 2,500 square foot main floor.

  Don paused again in the large family room at the back of the house. After fishing a heavy duty flashlight from his back pocket, he shined the beam up into the rafters, hoping to be able to get a better look at the roof damage that was the most likely cause of the missing ceiling. “It’s sad people let a place get like this.”

  Paul shrugged. “Sad for them, good for us.”

  Don flipped off the flashlight and jammed it back into his jeans pocket. “I think you should talk to Mina and Thomas, fill them in and if they’re interested we come back and go over this place with a fine tooth comb.” It would be important to catch every possible issue because missed problems could add up. Quickly. A profitable flip could end up a money pit because of a single overlooked repair.