by S. G. Sonysa
It was the second time in my life seeing Chase Edward breaking down in front of me.
I saw so many emotions playing on his face, but the most prominent ones were pain and guilt.
“Chase, why didn’t you tell me this before? Why did you wait three years?” I asked him, kneeling down.
“Hailey… when I came to visit you, you refused to meet me. I thought that I will not show you my face until you ask me to,” he explained to me, still shaking with tears.
“Oh, Chase.” I flung myself into his arms hugging him.
“I’m sorry for keeping you away from Noah,” I said, crying uncontrollably on his shoulder.
We both stayed in each other’s arms crying for the loss of our happiness. Then Chase pulled away, making me open my swollen eyes.
“Hailey, I still love you,” Chase said.
“Chase, please it’s too soon to claim that you love me. Let me absorb all these things you have told me tonight.” I hugged him again.
Both of our faces were stained with tears and eyes red from crying.
His arms were wrapped around my body pulling me closer. He made me sit on his lap. I tightened my arms around his neck hugging him that was when his body started to shake violently.
“Chase. What is happening?” I asked him worried.
“Ha… Hailey… uh… my… uh… medi… cines… uh, my… bag.” His grip loosened.
I nodded and scrambled up from the floor running upstairs to the room and searched his bag for medicines. When I found the small medicine box, I ran back down and fetched a water bottle from the kitchen.
I went to Chase and kneeled down to give him the medicine. He took the box in his shaking hand and searched for the pills. He took out two white pills and threw them into his mouth. I offered him the water bottle, and he took it from me, gulping down hurriedly.
He leaned his head back on the seat of the couch as he was still sitting on the floor.
After five minutes, his breathing turned normal, but he looked tired like he ran a marathon. The energy was drained from his body, leaving his face pale.
I saw the labels of the medicine, and my hands trembled. I looked at Chase’s sleeping form and felt the tears blurring my vision.
Rubbing my eyes, I got up and pulled Chase on the couch then pushed him into a lying position. I pulled out extra blankets and pillows from the cabinet. I put the pillow under his head and a blanket over him then I sat on the floor.
I ran my fingers through his soft hair. I didn’t know that he was hurting this much inside.
I thought it was only me who had a broken heart. But I guess, we both became broken-hearted after the divorce.
I placed kisses on his forehead, his cheek, and jaw.
“I believe you, Chase Edwards. I believe every single word you told me tonight. I’m sorry for not understanding you and blaming you for everything. I’m really sorry for not being a good partner and a good wife for you when you deserve the best. I love you… I never stopped loving you even when I tried my best. It was impossible for me.”
Hearing his even breathing, I felt relaxed. I put my head on the small space on the couch near Chase’s chest and laced my fingers with his. And just like that, I fell asleep holding his hand in mine.
Chapter Thirty-Four
Never Let Her Go Again
Chase
I woke up feeling my whole body ache and moved to my left side. My eyes landed on Hailey. She was sleeping soundly, and her head was resting on the couch while the rest of her body was on the floor in a sitting position.
I tried to sit up but realized that her grip on my bicep was quite tight.
I looked at her and saw a frown on her face. I touched her face and smoothened out the frown. Her clothes had creases on them, and her face was free from all makeup, but she still looked beautiful.
But why was she sleeping here?
Then whatever happened last night came to me, and I groaned in embarrassment. I might have scared her last night with my panic attack.
I shook my head and tried to remove her hand. She woke up at the slight movement.
Her head snapped up, and she looked around startled. When her eyes landed on me, she got up from the floor in haste and stumbled. Her foot got tangled in the mess of blankets on the floor, making her fall directly on my lap.
“Uh. Sorry,” she said with wide eyes, looking innocent and cute.
“It’s fine.” I squeezed her waist, and she stopped.
My hands were still placed on both sides of her waist, which she noticed and her cheeks turned bright red.
I smiled internally at her shyness.
She was still the same: beautiful yet shy and cute.
“Are you alright, Chase?” she asked me, nibbling on her lower lip.
I was distracted by her sweet motion, and my focus was completely on her soft lips.
“I’m fine, Hailey,” I mumbled, still staring at her lips.
“Chase you scared me last night. I thought you had a heart attack.” She looked sad.
“I’m sorry, Hailey. I used to have these panic attacks when I was a kid. They used to appear when I get worried or feel nervous. But they stopped happening on their own when I turned 12. My grandfather helped me a lot in driving my fear away. They just started to reappear after you and Noah left…” I said grimacing.
“Oh… Chase, I didn’t know what was happening. I got really scared. I thought you were dying.” She started crying.
“Hailey, I wasn’t dying. It was just a panic attack so relax,” I said, cupping her face in my hands.
“But it happened because of me. I triggered it. I’m sorry.”
The tears were still falling from her eyes.
“No. Hailey, you didn’t trigger it. The fear started creeping into my mind when I thought what would happen if you won’t believe me. I love you,” I said, trying to make her relax.
“Chase, I believe you, okay… I believe every word you said last night.” She stared into my eyes.
“Thank you for still believing me when I lied to you and hid my feelings and the truth from you like a coward,” I said, feeling disappointed in me.
“No. Chase, you’re not a liar. I understand why you hid things from me in the past and the reason behind it. We made many mistakes in the past, and it led us here. That day when you came to meet me, I should have met you instead of hiding like a child. I was trying to protect my fragile heart from crumbling down.” She was trying everything to lighten my guilty.
“You’re perfect Hailey. You didn’t make any mistakes. It was all my fault.”
“Chase the attack you had last night was really serious. You can’t take it casually. You should contact your psychologist or therapist right now.” She looked extremely worried.
“You are right, but we are in the middle of nowhere, and it’s a day after Christmas. Aren’t you studying psychology to become a psychologist? Can I be your first patient?” I asked Hailey in a mischievous tone.
“What?” She looked bewildered.
“I mean you can be my very own personal psychologist. What do you say?” I asked her with all seriousness.
“I am not a psychologist yet. But I think for a patient like you this will work…” She then placed her lips on mine.
It was the first time, she was initiating the kiss. I was paralyzed with shock. My heart was hammering in my chest, ready to leap out any moment.
Before she could pull away from me because of my lack of response, I started moving my lips in sync with her. My hands went to rest on her waist, and unintentionally my fingers started to make circles. I pulled her closer to my body and felt her hand making its way to my neck from my shoulder. I was letting her control the pace. I couldn’t help myself from lightly biting her tempting lower lip. A small gasp escaped from her mouth, and I took the risk of diving my tongue into her mouth.
This kiss felt so different from any others that we shared in the past. It felt real. I could feel the passion, the fire
, and the need for us growing with every stroke. Now after years I felt alive. I always knew I loved her but doubted that she would feel the same for me after all these years. But the way she was kissing me made me realize how wrong I was. Her every move, her every touch, and her body pressed against mine were making me go crazy. I was burning, and she was soothing me.
I remembered how she used to do anything just to get my approval, and my acceptance. But now I was the one craving for her approval, her acceptance, and her love.
We both pulled away from each other breathless. A shy smile was playing on her lips, and when she caught me staring, she averted her eyes.
I felt like it was a dream or my illusion. I couldn’t believe that she was sitting on my lap and we just kissed passionately.
“I… think this is more effective than any medicine. It will keep me numb for a long time.” I teased her and winked.
“I… I… uh should go check on Noah,” she said shyly and got up.
Her movements were sluggish, and there was a dazed look on her face. She tripped when her foot collided with Noah’s toy and cursed.
I got up to give her a hand when she scrambled back. I frowned at her action.
“I… uh. I’m fine.” She looked nervous but still cute.
I smiled at her lifting my hands in surrender. She got up and ran upstairs.
Smiling like a fool, I ran my hands through my hair and thought I would never let her go again. I felt happy after sharing the truth with her. I knew there were still many things to tell her, but for the time being, these things were enough for her to know.
When I heard Noah and Hailey coming down, I got up and went to them. Taking Noah in my arms I kissed his head, and he kissed me on the cheek. My heart swelled at his actions. I felt proud of Hailey for raising a sweet kid like her. I looked at his nose that looked exactly like mine, a replica in fact, and his hair that was the same shade as his mother’s. He did look a lot like me, but I hoped his life would not turn out like mine.
After taking a shower, I came downstairs, and I told them that we needed to leave within an hour because the weather would be getting worse.
We had breakfast then we packed our things. I placed our bags in the trunk of my car and locked the cabin. Noah wished to take one last stroll around the woods, and after that we drove away, leaving the cabin and the beautiful memories of our life there.
When we arrived at her house, it was five in the evening. She got out and helped Noah in getting out of the car with his gifts. I also stepped out of the car and pulled her bag out from the trunk then followed her into her house.
***
Hailey
I went inside the house, and Chase was following behind me with my bags.
“Boo.” I heard a voice and jumped.
“Ethan, you dirtbag!” I yelled, punching him in the arm and calming my beating heart.
He just stupidly smiled at me enjoying my misery.
“What are you doing here?” I asked Ethan.
“Oh. I see you’re not happy to find me here.” He made a sad face and jutted out his lower lip.
I rolled my eyes at his childish behavior.
“You know I didn’t mean it like that, so stop making that face. I’m just curious to see you here especially on the day after Christmas,” I said to him, looking very interested to know why he came here.
“Well, you see, Sammy was nagging me to take him to meet Noah because he wants to show him his gifts. That’s why I came here. And I have brought a special gift for you.” He placed a key in my hand.
I took it and instantly knew what it was.
I turned around to see Chase still holding my bag.
“Ethan, this is Chase,” I said to Ethan.
Though Chase had already done quite a good job in introducing himself to my whole college, I still introduced him.
“And this is Ethan. He studies in college with me, and he is a very good friend of mine,” I said to Chase, making gestures with my hand.
“Hi.” Ethan was the first one to extend his hand.
I took the bag from Chase’s hand but he protested, and I reassured him that I could carry my bags to my room.
“Hello,” Chase said and shook his hand.
They both looked extremely awkward, so I left them to go to my room to drop off my bag.
Then I went to the garage and found my car. Ethan knew best which things needed modification in my car, so I asked him once to make my car brand new. He said he would do it, but I knew he was waiting for Christmas to do that.
My car looked new, no scratch, and had the latest car accessories. The new leather covers looked so nice. I checked everything again then went inside to say thank you to Ethan.
When I reached inside, Chase and Ethan were standing nose to nose and glaring at each other.
“Then let’s start the game,” Ethan said.
Chapter Thirty-Five
Then Let’s Start the Game
Chase
Hailey left us to see whatever that boy had given her.
“Hello, Chase. Let me just make one thing clear. Hailey is not yours anymore so stop manipulating her. I know who you are and what you do. Your and Clara’s relationship was popularly discussed by Boston magazine last month. Hailey is innocent. She doesn’t read magazines about businessmen like you, so I suggest stay away from her,” Ethan said, fuming.
“Why are you so concerned about her, pretty boy? Are you interested in her? If that’s the case, then I pity you. And let me also clarify one thing with you. Not every time what the paparazzi or the magazines say is true. You have no right to interfere in my personal life and call me a manipulator. So I suggest you stay away from her because she wants me and I’m the father of her son.” I was also getting angry at his claim on my Hailey.
“Oh really, so where were you all these years? Do you think I’m a fool? Three years is a long time man. You don’t know her like I do and your son loves me. If you quietly leave my girl and this city, I’ll propose to her at the end of the last semester,” Ethan said, moving nearer to me.
My hands were clenching with anger, and I also moved an inch glaring at his face.
Sarcastically laughing at him I said, “Go find a girl for you pretty boy because she is my wife, my woman, and my son’s mother. You’re just her friend. Keep it that way. Don’t cross the line. I am her husband, and she loves me and that I know because of what happened between us last night.”
I smirked when his face fell.
“You’re her ex-husband. What happened last night? Did you have sex with her? You are sick. You are using her, manipulating her. I will do everything in my power to make her mine,” Ethan said, looking at me with disgust.
I was ready to pounce on him.
“What we did or did not last night is not your concern. And you can try to make her fall in love with you, but let me tell you, it’s a lost battle because she already belongs to me.”
“Then let’s start the game,” Ethan said, standing nose to nose with me.
We heard a voice of a throat being cleared and turned our heads slowly to see Hailey standing there.
Shit, how much did she hear?
“Um, what are you guys talking about?” Hailey asked us.
She glanced at our faces with a questioning gaze.
“I… I… We were talking about a new video game and that we should play it someday,” Ethan said while rubbing his neck.
“Yeah, we were talking about a new video game. I think I should leave now.” I looked at everywhere but Hailey.
I moved out of the door, and Hailey followed behind me.
“Chase… Chase, what happened?” Hailey asked me.
We had now reached my car.
“Hailey nothing happened. I want to take you somewhere tomorrow if that’s fine with you,” I asked her, hoping that she would say yes.
“Noah isn’t going to leave his toys for a week. He has a habit of getting obsessed with new things.” Hailey had a smile
on her face.
“Uh… Hailey, I didn’t say Noah should come with us. I said I want to take you somewhere,” I said smiling at her.
“Oh… I’m free tomorrow.”
“Then I’ll pick you up at seven,” I said to her.
She nodded her head in a silent yes. I was about to leave when I caught sight of Ethan leaning at the door and looking at us.
An evil plan formed in my head and I said, “Hailey, aren’t you going to give me the evening dose? You know, I might a get panic attack while driving”.
I took a step closer to her and placed my hand on her waist then pulled her closer, leaving no space between us.
She gave me a shy smile and wrapped her arms around my neck then pulled me down.
“I don’t think you need the dose now because you look fine to me,” she said, unaware how her voice had lowered and turned seductive.
“Well… I’m not fine, Hailey. Leaving you here after spending days with you and Noah is a very difficult thing to do for me.” My voice was filled with love and pain.
She captured my lips and our lips moved in sync. The kiss was short but sweet and enough to show Ethan that she was mine. I bid her goodbye pecking her lips one more time before leaving.
***
Hailey
When I walked into the house, I had a silly smile on my face. Ethan was standing at the door.
I hoped he didn’t see us kissing. It would be really embarrassing for me if he did.
“Ethan, how was your Christmas?” I asked him, but instead of answering my question, he glared at me.
“Hailey, I know it’s personal, but tell me, did you sleep with him? Did something happen last night between you and him?” Ethan was fuming with anger.
“What the hell, Ethan? It’s my personal life. Whether I slept with him or not does not concern you. You have no right to ask me such a personal question,” I said, getting angry at his nonsense questioning.
