Spirits

by Leslie Edens Copeland

  Emmett hung his head while Teddy howled with laughter.

  "Been at it again, boys?" said the bull-headed creature. "This constant fighting does not become you. See the pickle it's gotten you into?" He shook his bull's head, the horns slashing the air. "You worked so well together when you locked me down here."

  "Plouton?" mouthed Emmett in surprise. He tugged the demon cord from his throat. "What's happened to the Lord of the Underwood?" he demanded of the red demon.

  "Never mind," said the demon. "None of your concern. His worship is taking a little relaxation therapy. I assure you, there's absolutely nothing wrong."

  Teddy snickered.

  Emmett glanced at Teddy and groaned. "Please tell me Teddy didn't—"

  "Didn't what?" said Teddy, rolling his eyes to the ceiling innocently. Still in his five-year-old incarnation, he appeared quite cherubic.

  "He did," said Emmett. "It's some kind of curse. What did he do to you, Lord Plouton?"

  "Whatever do you mean?" lowed Plouton. "You haven't seen me in quite a while, All. This manifestation as a bovine-headed warrior is simply a new thing I'm trying."

  Emmett gulped. "Look, your worship. I can reverse whatever he's done. I will need the help of my friend, whom I lost to a slough tree earlier. But I can fix this. I do apologize. He's so rude."

  "Silence!" bellowed Plouton.

  "I mean, I know, believe me!" Emmett continued. "I've had to live with the little crud for two millennia. He has no social skills whatsoever. Always setting people I like on fire. Belching at the table! You should see the rat's nest he calls a bed!" Emmett warmed up to his rant. "Perhaps you'd be interested in a lecture covering the finer points of the suffering Teddy has inflicted on me? I've already categorized the headings alphabetically: abominations, animosity, bludgeoning, discourtesy, electrocution, hygiene, immolation . . ."

  "Enough!" shouted Plouton. He strained against his chains and extended his hand out to the red demon. "Trevor, could I confer with you for a moment?"

  The demon shuffled closer. In an instant, Plouton stretched forth his mighty arm, seized the demon, and attempted to stuff him into his widely distended mouth. The demon scratched and howled, fighting back with incredible strength, while Plouton gnawed on his head. However, the bull's jaws could not penetrate the demon's hard skull and Plouton chewed in vain. At last, the demon kicked his way loose. He sprung to the far wall of the chamber, cowering behind the throne and panting, his limbs quaking with fear from the narrow escape.

  The moment the demon pulled himself loose, Plouton called out his apologies. "I'm sorry, Trevor. Please forgive me. This terrible urge comes over me and I feel I must eat some brains."

  "Oh, you must be joking!" said Emmett. He rolled his eyes in disgust. "A zombie curse? How childish can you get?" Emmett had to steady himself, as his eye continued rolling and rolling for quite some time. When they stopped, he asked, "Could anyone explain why Plouton's got that cow's head?"

  "I can!" Teddy's high-pitched giggle reeked of sheer evil. "Lord Plouton did that to himself. He's trying to avoid eating his help!"

  "Tis true what the small Bellum says," Plouton affirmed. "I gulped down twelve demons' brains before I thought to transform my head into that of a bull. I find it near impossible to chew through a skull with only bovine teeth."

  Teddy collapsed in a fit of laughter and Emmett kicked at him.

  "Shut up!" said Emmett. "You know you'll pay for your fun. What were you thinking, to curse Lord Plouton? It's bad enough, you trying to murder me all the time. But now you've really done it. I doubt Lord Plouton will be as forgiving as I am."

  "I'll forgive anyone," said Plouton loudly. "As long as they bring me some nice, delicious brains!" He mooed insistently. The echoes against the chamber walls made him sounded like a herd of cattle.

  "Let me help you remove the curse," said Emmett. "If your demons can but find my protégée Aether, I can rid you of this nuisance once and for all."

  "Fair enough," said Plouton. "Then I'll have three brains to roast."

  "No, your worship—" Emmett began.

  Plouton had already raised his hands to summon the denizens of the Underwood. "Demons and shades!" he bellowed. Then he appeared to think better of it. "Go outside, Trever, and announce a search is on. Just don't let anyone come in here. What does she look like, All?"

  "She has the most splendid eyes, like spun gold," said Emmett, straightening into his lecturing stance. Then he relaxed into a besotted smile. "She's diminutive, about five feet tall. She has the curliest blonde hair and the cutest little nose. Her lips are pale pink and taste like the desert after a rainstorm and . . . and . . ."

  "All?" Plouton mooed in puzzlement. "Have you caught a love bug? Who is this protégée? It isn't Columbia again, is it?" He glared at the tied-up Teddy. "Or has Bellum put a curse on you, too?"

  "Of course it's not Columbia," said Emmett, gagging. "If I told everybody once, I must have told them a thousand times—I never liked her. She has a huge thing for me, though. And I'm not under a curse, either. I'm talking about my protégée, Aether. Do I really sound that far gone? I do admit, I can't stop thinking about her." He grinned widely, unable to contain his enthusiasm.

  Within the slough tree, I felt a warm tingling all through me. I couldn't stop thinking about him either.

  "Good All, All." Plouton snorted. "You're involved with another of your protégées?"

  "I was not involved with Columbia," Emmett snapped.

  "Sure you weren't." Plouton shook his head, horns wagging back and forth. "Maybe if you got a protégée a bit more mature than you are, this wouldn't keep happening," he said.

  "More mature than I am? Would you have me dig up a mummified Egyptian, Plouton?" asked Emmett.

  Plouton coughed. "Well, not only mummies are fairly . . . mature. I once had a forest nymph protégée who was well over a thousand. Of course, we still wound up getting married so that didn't really solve the problem."

  Emmett emitted a low whistle. "I remember her. Coçeaux, wasn't it? Not hard to see why. She was pretty unforgettable, if even I remember her."

  "Yes, she was," mooed Plouton sadly. "She left me some decades ago."

  "Pity. These mixed relationships are difficult," said Emmett. "Things can get pretty awkward between a spirit and a mortal."

  "Mortal! Great depths! I forgot—your protégées are mortal, aren't they? How did a mortal get into my realm without my notice? Oh, things are falling apart, moo-re and moo-re," said Plouton.

  "You might have been a little distracted by the zombie curse, your worship," said Emmett, bowing his head to hide a smile.

  "If that isn't the truth! I don't know how you put up with that monstrosity you call a brother, but I wish you'd bring him closer to me for a second. I'd like to get a taste of those nice, juicy brains," said Plouton.

  Emmett shook his head, his arms firmly folded. Teddy gave Plouton a smug grin and stuck out his tongue.

  "No, hmm? Very well," said Plouton. "I suppose then, Trevor, you'd better gather my hordes to begin the search. Oh, great depths. A mortal in my realm. I hope she at least has nice, fresh brains."

  After advising Trevor that I had last been seen inside a large slough tree, Emmett watched thousands of shades and demons take off in every direction. Then he strolled back inside, where he kept a close eye on Plouton and Teddy. But mostly on Teddy.

  "Plouton, I'm sorry to have caused this," said Emmett. "I threw Teddy down here for obvious reasons, after putting up with two thousand years of his dysfunctional behavior. I certainly never suspected he'd give you any problems."

  "Even we have limits to what we can deal with," said Plouton. "Although my realm is strong. After Bellum has been here from some length of time, he will soon suffer a loss of powers that will render him less harmful."

  "I don't know about that," said Emmett. "You'd be surprised what he can accomplish with just a hat pin."

  "Ah, well. The matter is moo-oot anyway, since he can never retu
rn," said Plouton.

  "No, nor can I," said Emmett, politely ignoring Plouton's bovine outburst. "I suppose it's another eternity following Teddy around, putting out fires as he starts them." He sighed as woefully as a spirit can sigh, a breeze rippling through his entire body.

  "Ugh." Plouton fanned the air. "Keep sighing like that, and you'll attract some of the nastier denizens of my realm."

  "Pardon me," said Emmett. "You will at least send my mortal friend back, if they find her? She doesn't belong in this world. I'm not certain what damage her presence could wreak on the Underwood's structural integrity."

  "That's a load of fabricated nonsense," said Teddy, sticking out his tongue at Emmett. "Don't listen, Lord Plouton. Emmett thinks you're ignorant in the sciences. He's trying to trick you."

  Plouton's cow face drooped. "Great depths of crux! I've never encountered this problem before," he said. "It's true, actually. I am a bit rusty in the alchemical arts. There's probably a rule or directive to address this—cruxing Bellum's bells! What'll I do?" He mooed sadly. "Could one of you come a little closer, please?"

  "No!" shouted Emmett and Teddy together.

  After a short silent spell, Emmett cleared his throat and said, "I really sent him down here with the best possible intentions."

  "Oh, I can see what you're dealing with," said Plouton. "And you were right to do it. This is the best place for the incurably evil. It's just—I'm not sure if it's the best place for the universally powerful incurably evil." He rolled his bull eyes at Teddy nervously and mooed.

  A black demon with a thick, scraggly coat bounded into the throne room, his claws scratching the stone floor. "Your worship!" he said. "Allow me to announce that the Aether being has been located. We are mere moments from removing her from the slough tree. She is a tad bit sap-covered. In fact, she's swimming in it. We believe she is alive, however, and should be capable of performing her functions."

  Sure enough, I could feel the vibrations in the tree's internal substance and even hear sounds burbling up from below me. So, my vision told the truth—they had found me. Seconds later, a red demon swam into my sight, moving with incredible speed through the gelatinous innards of the slough tree. I remained suspended, waiting for his arrival. I heard one last exchange between Plouton and his demon assistant.

  "Very good, Percival," said Plouton. "Will you also call for my medicine dancers? They should be here to assist us and they should dance around me very closely. For maximum curative effect."

  "No, sire, I think not," said the black, shaggy demon, shaking his head. "You've had far too much to eat tonight as it is. The medicine dancers can safely gyrate from the adjoining room."

  Red claws grasped for me. The demon lashed a cord around my waist and ankles and I felt a pull. Not downwards as I'd expected. This felt like we were rising, heading up.

  The pressure on my head eased, bright light dazzling my eyes, and I gasped air. My head had breached the surface of the sap! Were they going to release me, push me out of the Underwood and into the upper world? I stared, dumbfounded, at the sunlight twinkling on the gray blades of grass in the portal field. No, not sunlight. Emmett said it was called deadlight. I gazed up at the murky gray sky. Only my head protruded from the surface of a mighty slough tree on the edge of the Disenchanted Forest.

  "I can't go back without Emmett," I said, coughing. "I won't."

  Chapter Eleven

  Covered in Sap

  Before my arms could break free of the tree's sticky substance, a tug on my waist and ankles yanked me firmly downward. I took a deep breath, like I was about to dive to the bottom of a swimming pool, before my head sank back into the slough tree's thick substance. Now, our direction was decidedly down. We plunged deep into the tree's dark center and toward the depths of the Underwood cavern, the red demon dragging me, swimming with ferocious energy for the roots of the tree.

  Moments later, with a horrible slurping sound, the demon pulled me out of the tree. I slid onto the rock floor of the Underwood cave, surrounded by darkness again. The demon hoisted me on his back, lashed me on with his belt, and leapt through the air. The journey to Plouton's Hold passed by in a blur, mostly because of the copious amounts of sap covering my face, eyes, and ears. It was everywhere. I could feel the air whizzing around me as we traveled at demon speed. Then I heard a commotion of cheers, shouting, and stamping hooves. Great spongy creatures—shades, I presumed—clung to me, trying to absorb the sap from my clothes and hair. I shoved them aside. It wasn't working anyway. Then, through the sheen of sap, I spied a black suit and pale face.

  "Emmett!" I pushed past the shades and tried to wrap my arms around him—or through him, since he partially dematerialized as my sap-covered arms descended upon his coat.

  "Aether, I am in need of your assistance." His voice quivered as my arms passed through his ectoplasm, but his face remained quite serious.

  All around us, Plouton's demon horde murmured and growled, tracking our every move. I ignored them and tried again to hug Emmett.

  "You're not glad to see me, Em?" I said. "You wouldn't believe what I've been through."

  Emmett lifted his chin, affecting a superior attitude. "I know what you've been through, my young protégée. First a slough tree and now me. Kindly step back. Lord Plouton is badly in need of our services. We can catch up later, for it seems we will have plenty of time here."

  "Anyway, I'm thrilled to see you," I said, reaching once more to embrace him. This time, I made some contact. Emmett flickered and my arms buzzed with spectral energy. When Emmett's face cracked a wide grin, the demons roared and hooted and hollered.

  "Please, Aether," he whispered, his face glowing red, "Don't rile the demons up. Wait until we're inside the hold!"

  "Oh, who cares about them! Emmett, this is important," I said. "I made it all the way to the surface! I actually touched the deadlight for a half second or more."

  "That is wonderful news!" said Emmett. He took my arm and led me away from the shrieking, cavorting crowd of demons. They all booed as we left.

  "Then a demon lassoed me and dragged me back down," I said, still ignoring the demons. "But if he hadn't, I would have made it out. I'm sure."

  "That means you'll be able to leave when we're done here," said Emmett. "Perhaps you could take a message to Dead Town for me and apologize to the council for my absence." After a moment's thought, he added, "I have heard tales of demons wandering above the surface, particularly in the Disenchanted Forest. The slough trees must provide portals for them to come and go. This bears looking into. If I were still presiding in Dead Town, I'd launch an immediate investigation. Perhaps you can convey this directive to the council or the spirit who takes my place."

  "You will convey it to them yourself," I said. "If I can get out that way, so can you."

  "Don't be too sure." Emmett lowered his head. "The laws of the Underwood apply differently to me than they do to a mortal such as yourself. If I could maintain a firm material shape, I might be able to fool the slough tree, but since I've been down here so long—" Emmett's image flickered in and out. "You see yourself how well I control that particular aspect of my being."

  I frowned. "I'm not giving up on you just yet. And there's something else," I said. "I had a vision in the slough tree of my father! He sent me a message. He's trapped down here somewhere. We have to find him!"

  Emmett snapped his fingers when he heard this, the hollow sound echoing in the vast temple. "We'll ask Plouton. His demons and shades can find anything down here."

  "Will Plouton help us?" I asked. "Dad didn't even want us to search for him. He thinks it's hopeless. But if there's a chance, I want to try."

  "Hopeless? Of course not! Plouton will indeed help us, because we're going to do something very important to help him," said Emmett.

  "So I heard," I said. "I had visions of what he said to you and Teddy. Bellum put a zombie curse on Plouton. So immature!"

  Emmett folded his arms and nodded, while I gazed up at the tem
ple ceiling above—far, far above. The highest point was lost in the cavernous darkness, the rest riddled by tree roots and hewn of yellow stone. I leaned farther and farther back, trying to determine where it ended.

  "Everything in the Underwood is so gigantic. I wouldn't know where to begin looking," I said. "I tried summoning Dad, but that had no effect. I certainly hope these demons have better luck when they search. Well . . . first things first. What are we doing for the king of the cavern?"

  Emmett flapped around, moaning and groaning. "Can you believe how ridiculous—this curse my brother put on Plouton needs to be removed. And I'm so weak now, I need your help to take it off. First, do you still have the Nonbook?"

  I patted the sleeve of my sweater and slid the scroll out to show him. "Sure do."

  "Good and it escaped the worst of the sap. You are indeed an excellent protégée. Aether. Excellent. Indeed." He fumbled to take my hand. His hand buzzed in mine as he led me inside. In the hall, Plouton stood chained, casting his bull's head around to see us. I shook my own head sadly at the sight.

  We stood far back from the circle where Plouton was chained. Emmett whispered to me, his eyes bright with yearning, "How I've missed you, my little protégée. How ever will I abide here, with Bellum and Plouton for company, once you depart?"

  A smile crept to my lips, despite the seriousness of the matter. I had missed him so much. I squeezed his hand the best I could. My spirit boyfriend. Boyfriend? Is that what Emmett was? What I wanted him to be?

  Emmett edged us closer to the muscled torso swathed in thick chains. Looking up at Plouton's lowing bull's head, I was reminded of the Minotaur from Greek mythology.

  "Now, don't get to close to him," said Emmett. He gripped my hand tighter, creating a pleasant hum up my arm. "No matter what he says, listen to me, not him."

  I nodded, rather stupidly, my eyes searching Emmett's black eyes, his somber alabaster face. I've finally found someone. Me, Heather Despair, the girl who no boy would be interested in.

  I tugged at Emmett's hand and he gave me a fond smile. I grinned back, too enthusiastic by far. How long had it been since our last kiss? Too long. I blushed and as I grew warmer, the sap fumed into vapors. It evaporated off of me, wafting upward and trickling away.