Three Years Later

by Casey McMillin

  I crossed the room to stand in front of her. None of this was going to go away if we just ignored it.

  "Don't touch me," she said, as if I were the most disgusting thing she'd ever laid eyes on. I wasn't touching her, hadn't even come close. I was still standing a good four feet away. "I don't know how you can do this to me Collin. It's humiliating. It's life changing. You're making a life changing decision based on five minutes in a room with some girl you barely know. How could you?"

  She looked at me with such pain and despair that, had Rachel not been on the other end of this, I would have stayed with Beth out of sheer guilt.

  "Beth, I know it's hard to understand. I barely understand it myself." I began.

  "Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know. She's the one, right? Don't you understand what an asshole that makes you?"

  "Yes, I know. I'm the asshole right now."

  Josh cut in.

  "Okay, I think we've established who the asshole is around here. More importantly, we know where all of this is headed, so why don't we try to figure out how to make it go as smoothly as possible."

  I could've kissed Josh at that moment. I was at a loss to figure out how to get her to stop beating a dead horse and get her on a freaking plane.

  "Well I'm going to need a ride home. I'm not going to ask my dad to drive five hours to come get me, and as a favor to you, I'm not even going to tell him what you did. He'd kill you."

  "What do you think about me getting you a flight home?" I asked.

  "Why, because you can't even stand to be in the same vehicle with me now?"

  God love him, Josh stepped in again.

  "Let's not make this any harder than it already is Beth."

  "Oh, I'm sorry to inconvenience you both," she said, sarcasm dripping off the words. Then, in the silence that followed, her expression changed like something inside her shifted and she accepted the finality of the situation.

  On the outside, I kept my expression solemn, respecting how she was feeling. On the inside I was screaming Yesssss! She understands! I hated to seem like I was in a hurry or anything, but I sort of was. I kept my tone as neutral as I could.

  "Would you let me buy you a plane ticket home? I think it'd be the easiest thing, considering."

  "What about when we get there? We still have stuff to work out. We're part of each other's lives. I have stuff at your house, you have stuff at my house. We—"

  "People break up, Beth. I'm sorry it happened like this, I really am. But it is happening." It was hard to even look at her. I hated this. Hated it for her. There was absolutely no backing out, though.

  We got lucky. There was a flight scheduled to leave Las Vegas for San Diego in three hours. Beth decided to take a hotel shuttle to the airport, (which I think was best for everyone involved) but not before she tore me a new one for an hour straight in the hotel room.

  Josh and Ethan each tried to step in a few times, but I always waved them off. I knew I deserved what she was dishing out. It was only fair to give her the satisfaction of letting me have it after what I'd done. I knew the rest of the breakup would just consist of giving back each other's things, (if we even did that) so I figured I deserved a good tongue-lashing. But, did I regret it? Not for a second.

  And just like that… Beth was gone. Nothing, I'll say it again, nothing was stopping me from being with Rachel. My Rachel. Rachel Coleman.

  Josh and Ethan stuck around to help me find her, probably more for curiosity's sake than anything. I think they were thrown for a loop by my sudden urge to use the "m" word. They wanted to see if I'd really propose, and, if so, how Rachel would respond. They probably thought I was crazy, to tell you the truth.

  "Let me call the front desk," Josh said. He had already picked up the handset and pushed the number zero before that little announcement, so he wasn't really asking my opinion. "Yes," he said in an official tone. "My friend is staying here and I need her room number. Her name's Rachel Coleman… No, but she would want me to have her room number… I understand… Yes, please… Uhh, Collin, Collin Blake… Yeah, 2808… Okay, thanks." He hung up the receiver and looked at me.

  "Well?" I asked.

  "They can't give out room numbers. She'll have to call Rachel's room and give her the message that we want her to call us."

  "So she's staying here for sure?" I asked.

  "I thought you knew that already, Collin. I didn't even ask her… but I assume she would've corrected me if she didn't see her name, right?"

  "I don't know," I said, shaking my head, "I'm going down there." I didn't even bother with my tux jacket. I just stood to my feet and went for the door. Josh and Ethan got up and followed me without even thinking about it. I absently wondered who would be here to answer the phone if the front desk called back, but I knew I'd be talking to them soon enough.

  The elevator seemed to take forever. I was so anxious to see her I could hardly stand still. I leaned against the wall, drumming my fingers. Ethan's voice made me stop.

  "It's only ten thirty, don’t you think we'd be able to catch her at the banquet still?"

  "I'm sure she didn't stick around after that. Why? Did you see her when you went to tell everyone we were leaving?"

  "No, but I saw Joel and I talked to Seth. I think they were all there together."

  "She wasn't there with anyone, not like that," I said, a little too quickly. I knew he didn't mean anything by it, but I couldn't stop myself. "I'm sure Joel would know how to reach her, though," I continued, "If we can't track her down in her room, we'll go back to the banquet and see if we can find him."

  "You better get a ring." Josh was giving me a sideways smile, ribbing me. "If you plan on proposing, you better have a ring."

  He did have a point. It would be a pretty crummy proposal without a ring. What am I doing? I thought.

  I wanted to give Rachel the best of everything, and so far, this night had been the exact opposite of that. She'd had to deal with my screaming girlfriend, and now I was actually contemplating getting a plastic ring from a gift shop. I knew I'd get her a real ring sometime soon, but I wasn't about to use this time to ring shop when I could be finding her.

  "You're right," I told Josh, after such a long silence he probably thought I wasn't going to acknowledge his comment. "Let's see what the front desk has to say first, then I'll think about picking up a ring somewhere." I laughed when they both looked surprised. I knew neither of them thought I would go through with it. "You thought I was joking?" I was smiling, but they read the certainty in my eyes.

  The woman at the front desk was no help at all. She was as nice as could be, and technically didn't do anything wrong, but she didn't help me get to Rachel. She did confirm that one Rachel Coleman had a reservation tonight, but was unable to give me any further information. She tried to call the room Rachel Coleman reserved. No answer. Upon my request, she tried again. No answer. I went ahead and pushed my luck by asking again, but again, no answer.

  I had her take a message for Rachel, leaving my phone number. I had flashbacks from three years ago at Disney, but at least I had a few leads now.

  "I say we go back to the ballroom. Joel Perrin may still be there," Josh said.

  "I'm seriously going to stop in one of these gift shops across the street and pick up a ring first." I said. Josh and Ethan tried to hide their amusement. They'd spent the last year witnessing me evade the subject of marriage completely with Beth. They could smile all they wanted. I was pretty sure it'd be a while before I lived this night down… but it was a small price to pay.

  On our way out the door we ran into Chris Bowers and Bryce Young, two members of the National Team, both from Arizona.

  "Where you off too?" Josh asked.

  "Paul Smith is next door at the Grand. He's having a huge party. I heard he's gonna have some showgirls there… in costume." Bryce smiled and added, "All the swimmers are invited. You guys should come up there. It's on the top floor… 3001. It's gonna be craaaazy."

  Josh and Ethan looked at me wi
th expectant grins. "Go," I said, smiling. "Go with them, I'll meet you guys in a little bit."

  "What are you doing?" Bryce asked, looking at me.

  "He's going to find his one true love, and ask her to marry him." Ethan said, only teasing me a little.

  "Do you already know this girl?" Bryce asked, "Because I think one of those showgirls with a feather headdress is going to be my one true love tonight, and I heard there will be plenty of them to go around."

  "No, I've got it covered thanks. I definitely don't need any more girls in the mix."

  "What? Sounds kinky," Bryce said.

  Josh, who knew exactly how I would feel about the idea of sharing Rachel said, "He's totally serious about proposing to this girl tonight. We were just on our way to pick up a plastic ring."

  "Are you kidding me… Blake's getting married? Is it the girl that came to the—"

  "No," we all three said at the same time.

  "Well this I have to see." Bryce looked at Chris to see if he agreed. "We were worried about showing up too early anyway." He shifted his focus to me. "You care if we come with you guys, to see you ask her?"

  "I don't see why not, but the thing is… I have no idea where she is. It may take a while."

  "We'll tag along for a little bit and if you can't find her, we'll ditch you and head up to Paul's. Sound okay?"

  ****

  We must have been a sight in that gift shop, five of us in tuxedos, none of us under six-two. We compared plastic rings as if I were buying it for Cinderella herself.

  I decided on a simple, clear crystal with a gold band. The stone itself was about four carats, (which made it's fakeness totally obvious) but it was the simplest thing they had. Everything else looked like it came out of a quarter machine. Maybe this one looked like it came out of one of those things too, but it would have to work until I could get her a real one.

  "What size?" Ethan asked. We all looked like overgrown oafs staring down at those teeny tiny rings. We were trying to straighten out the little white tags so we could read the sizes.

  "I have an eight," Chris said.

  "This one's a six," Josh said. "I think a six is too small, though. When I would try on Kayla's ring, it would fit to about right here." He lifted his hands and showed us the spot on his finger where Kayla's ring would've stopped.

  "I say we look for something that size." I said. "I don't have a better suggestion." We found one that went to about the right spot on Josh's finger, and went with that. It was a size seven.

  I gave the cashier my debit card, and he put the twenty-two dollar ring into a black velvet ring box. I wasn't sure that I'd leave it in there. I'd hate for her to get her hopes up when she saw a real ring box.

  After a few seconds of thought, I resolved to take it out before I presented it to her. I'd probably even start the whole speech with this is just a plastic ring, or something like that. No, that sounded stupid. I had no idea what in the world I was going to say, actually. Everything I tried out in my head sounded extremely cheesy. I would just have to rely on myself not to screw it up once I had her in front of me.

  We went back to the hotel to see if Rachel had left a message with the front desk. While we were there, we asked the very patient receptionist try her room again. No answer.

  We stayed there for a few seconds talking about what we could possibly try next. During our conversation, one of us brought up Joel's name.

  "Joel Perrin?" Bryce asked.

  "Yeah, do you know him?" I asked.

  There must have been something urgent about my voice because Bryce's expression shifted to serious. "I just met him tonight," he said. "But he was standing with the group of people I was talking to when Paul Smith told us about his party. Why? What's he got to do with anything?"

  "Do you think he's going?" I asked, ignoring his question.

  "I don't know," he said, trying to recall. "I think he said something about his friend being sick but he'd try to come by if he could. What's Joel got to do with—"

  "He knows Rachel, the girl we're looking for. He could put us in touch with her for sure." My heart started hammering again at the slightest possibility of a lead. "Looks like we're going to the party," I said. "If Joel's not there, maybe someone will know how to reach him."

  "Yeah, I'm sure the chlorine guy has his number," Chris said, and I cursed myself for not thinking of it sooner. We left the Oasis without any further discussion.

  Chapter 15

  Rachel

  It was possible to engage in all manners of debauchery at a penthouse party in Las Vegas. I'd seen a few things already tonight that I rarely saw at parties. Not that I'd been to a ton of them, but still. There was a couple getting it on in one of the rooms. Not just heavy petting, mind you, but getting it on. The couple wasn't concerned in the slightest with people having to cut through the room they were in. I also saw a group of people openly doing coke. (Or whatever other white powder you snort. I didn't really stick around to ask them.)

  I could easily tell the swimmers from the non-swimmers by their stature, and none of the swimmers were doing anything crazy, (since they had to consider being in the public eye) but there was definitely craziness going on.

  It was a huge place, about the size of ten regular hotel rooms, I thought. The main room was one huge open space that had broken up into different seating areas with partial walls and room dividers. It felt really open, but there were definitely private nooks. There was also a long hallway with several more rooms to explore. Not to mention the balcony area and access to the roof. Long story short, there were a ton of places to get lost at this party. I did get lost… several times. At one point, I couldn't find Joel, and at another point I couldn’t find Gretchen. One time I couldn't find either one of them.

  I finally discovered them together on the balcony. They were face to face only inches apart like they were sharing some kind of moment. Then, all of a sudden, Gretchen looked away and laughed. "I win," she said, triumphantly. "I told you I can go all day."

  "You weren't lying," Joel said. "That was like eight minutes."

  She laughed again, and pushed at him. "It was not. It was only like thirty seconds."

  He laughed too. "Well, it felt like eight minutes."

  Gretchen looked at me, still laughing, and said, "The staring game. I'm World Champion."

  "I'll have to take your word for it," I said. "My eyes get dry when I'm nervous."

  "Aww, you're just afraid to lose."

  You know I took her challenge because, who wouldn't? And all I got was another round of smack talking when I lost.

  "You really are good," I said, blinking away the burn I acquired from keeping my eyes open too long. Seth found us after that, and he too wanted in on the staring game. Gretchen blew him out of the water too.

  "I'm telling you, I never lose. You can put me against anyone here." She pointed her finger around the whole room. "And I'll beat 'em."

  "I believe it," I said.

  Joel was convinced too. "I seriously might set up a few matches for money tonight if you can do it over and over like that." Joel said, and I couldn't tell if he was joking or serious.

  "My eyes never get dry, I could do it for hours."

  "Really?" Joel asked, amazed, and something else? There was so much intent in that one little word, really. It almost seemed like he had said it in a sexual way. I thought she was talking about playing a blinking game one second, and the next second, Joel Perrin is looking at her like he wants to eat her alive. What had Gretchen said? I wondered. Had she baited him to act like this? He looked for a second, like the wolf character in cartoons whose tongue rolls out as he sees the pretty lady.

  "Yeah really. Put me against anybody here. I'll win every time. Guaranteed."

  Joel was absolutely giddy at her confidence. He loved it, ate it up. He lit up like I'd never seen him light up before… a different smile, a true one.

  "Just stick with me girl, you'll be the ace up my sleeve if I get behind tonight."
He smiled at her. "My lady luck." They looked exactly like a gangsta and his lady luck. He was all dark hair, dark eyes, tall and impeccably dressed. She was a strikingly beautiful red head with freckles wearing an elegant teal dress.

  The two of them were a sight, and they didn't even know it. They were getting along with each other like old friends, acting like they'd known each other for years. I made a mental note to snap a picture of them with my cell phone later so she had something to look back on.

  Gretchen made it quite clear to me that she didn't expect and/or want anything serious to happen between her and Joel, but I could see the chemistry between them, and I wondered how long they'd be able to ignore it.

  No amount of possible flirting or general cuteness could have overshadowed what happened next, though. I really did have high hopes about the drama being over for the night, but it didn't turn out that way.

  Two girls had come onto the balcony carrying martini glasses with some variety of girlie drink inside. They were still wearing evening gowns from the banquet, and upon closer inspection, I realized I'd seen them there. I thought they must be girlfriends of a couple of the swimmers.

  "Did you see Beth? Can you believe he did that to her?" The girl with the silver dress was gawking at the one in blue. The one in blue looked concerned.

  "No, I didn't hear anything. I saw you talking to her, though. What happened?"

  There were a few other groups on the balcony, but all of the other people continued their conversations, not really paying attention to what the girls were saying. Gretchen, Joel, Seth and I, however, were completely tuned in to the two girls. I wasn't sure what they were talking about exactly, but their tone and content of the conversation so far made me pause and listen to them.

  "Well you remember Beth, right? I think she was at the Open, or maybe it was Nationals last year… I know you've met her."

  "Yeah, Collin's girlfriend, right?"

  My palms immediately started sweating and my stomach clinched at the sound of his name. I saw Gretchen flinch like she was about to say something and I put a hand on her knee to stop her. She looked at me with a question in her expression, and I shook my head to let her know I wanted to hear what the girls had to say.