THIEF: Part 5
Page 2
Drunk, while sober.High.Flying and anchored.All at once, with just a single kiss.
Chapter Two
When Silas finally pulls away, his eyes watery and locked mercilessly on mine, I catch myself leaning after him.He notices, too.
“You want me to touch you.”He says it so confidently, his voice gravelly and steady as rope, tied around my waist.Pulling me in.
I don’t speak, but I don’t resist as one hand holds my head, wound into my hair, and he kisses me again.As one hand slips up my back, finding the zipper, and pulls it down so slowly that I shiver.
“You have no idea, Erin.”He speaks right into my ear as he slips my sleeves down my shoulders, then pushes my dress down my body to the floor.“You have no idea the kind of things I’ve been imagining.”Silas unhooks my bra in one quick motion, throwing it behind us.He hooks his pinky into my panties and slides them down to my ankles.Kneeling, he rests his hands on the back of my thighs, eye-level with my navel.
“Me too,” I manage, my voice hoarse.
“Yeah?” he says, looking up at me.He lowers his head, inch by inch, until I feel his breath rippling across my skin, across the area I want so desperately to feel him touch.“Do you ever imagine me…when you’re with him?”
My voice chokes on my words.“I don’t know.”I think of the first few times Alex and I had sex, how often I’d compare him with Silas.It wasn’t quite imagining him in Alex’s place…but it wasn’t something I’d felt safe enough to admit to Alex, either.
“What’s this?” he asks, swiping a finger across my lips.They’re already wet for him, remembering his touch even better than my mind.When he holds up his hand, though, I can see Alex’s ejaculate, glistening in the lamplight.
My heart thunders.I’m not sure if I’m scared to answer, or scared Silas will call the whole thing off, before it even begins.
“You let him come inside you,” Silas whispers, flinging it off his hand with disgust.“You never let me do that.”
“It’s not like that that, Silas,” I protest, unsure of why, exactly, I feel the need to defend my choice at all.“It’s just that…the treatment, for my kidneys, it—it makes me infertile, temporarily.”
“That was one of the things I liked to imagine—coming inside of you.Both of us coming at the same time.”Suddenly, he pushes two fingers inside me.He finds my G-spot instantly, and the steady power of his strokes practically buckles my knees; I have to brace myself against his shoulders.
“Silas.”My voice is just a soft gust of air, trickling into the air.“Oh, God, Silas…”
“Keep saying my name, baby.I’ll have you shouting it before I’m through.”Silas starts licking my clit, swollen, still a little tender from Alex.I feel a flare of guilt thinking of him, waiting for me.But Silas starts to swirl his tongue.Suck and kiss and nibble, just the edges of his perfect teeth grazing my most sensitive spot.
“Silas.”I dig my nails into his shoulders, struggling to stay standing.“Jesus, Si…I—I can’t—”Before I can finish my sentence, a burst of sweet-smelling liquid washes across his hand, dripping onto the floor and my dress.
“Damn,” Silas grins, moving my dress out of the way for me.“Never made you squirt before—another thing I fantasized about.”He runs his tongue, hard, against my clit, and looks up at me.“Alex ever make you do that?”
Breathless, I shake my head.“I didn’t even know what that… What is that?”
Silas shakes his head too, laughing.“You’re adorable, Erin.”Without warning, he plunges his fingers deeper, pushing so hard against my G-spot that I whimper and fall to the floor.“Watch,” he commands, cupping my chin with one hand and making me look down as his other hand repeats the motion.I shut my eyes from the pleasure.
“Watch.”
I open my eyes at the sharpness of his tone.He does it again.“Oh, God,” I breathe, both of us watching as the liquid shoots from my pussy a third time.The cuff of his sleeve is soaked; a small puddle’s formed on the floor.“Silas,” I gasp, “what is that?”
“Relax, baby,” he says, doing it again.“Just means your pussy likes what I’m doing to it.”He starts to do the motion repeatedly, nonstop, until an endless stream of the liquid pours out of me.I can’t control it.I can’t even speak or breathe anymore.All I know, for what seems like years in just a few seconds, is pleasure.
“You let him fuck you in the ass,” Silas says suddenly, stopping.“I can tell.”
“What?”I catch my breath, my chest heaving.“What?No…no, Silas, I…”I pause, swallowing, wondering why I keep answering his questions.The ache of my pussy, eager for his touch again, throbs around his motionless fingers as if to tell me, This is why.“He fingered me.”
“In both your holes.”
I nod, shutting my eyes at the weight of what I’m about to admit: “That’s been one of my fantasies while you were gone.Imagining you...doing that to me.”
“You don’t say.”He smirks slyly.I feel his other fingertip, touching there, teasing.
“Silas…”
“You’re right—we probably don’t have time for everything I want to do to you.”He pulls his fingers out of me, fast, and snickers at the empty, sad whimper I give in return.“Get on the pillows over there,” he says.
I follow his nod.“But—”
“I’m gonna fuck you where he fucked you,” he says.The anger is subtle, behind his teasing, sexy tone.“I’m gonna fuck you better than he fucked you—make you come even harder.”
I don’t know why, but my senses finally come back to me.“Silas…I can’t.I—I’m with Alex.”
“Yeah.Yeah.I know.”He nods, over and over, looking pissed.“You love him.I get it.”
“Don’t do this.”
“Do you trust him, like you trusted me?”He points to his chest.“I know I fucked that up big-time, okay, but—but do you?”
“Yes,” I whisper.“I trust him.”
“That’s not what I asked.”He moves close again, his knees in the puddle we just made, his breath smelling like me.“I asked if you trust him like you trusted me.”
“I don’t…”
“Does he know everything?How your mom was, what happened with us?All your shoplifting, the fact you dropped out of high school?How Gordon raped you?”His tough façade slips, just for a moment; behind the liquor, anger, and jealousy, I see a hint of Silas as I once knew him, or at least believed him to be.The one who loved me as deeply as I loved him.The one who didn’t want to hurt me, after all.
This time, it’s me who kisses him.
I undress him quickly.His clothes are ones I don’t recognize.They might be new; they might be old, and I just never saw him dressed for the cold.It’s strange to see his chest without a summer tan.His face without bangs, brushing just above his eyes.
We lie down on the pillows, him on top.I reach behind me instinctively, for a headboard.“You can hang on to me,” he says, so I do.My nails trace the muscles in his back lightly.
“Here,” I whisper, and reach one hand down to guide him in.Even with the liquor in his system, his erection’s full, rock-hard.When I pull my hand away, letting him take it from here, he thrusts forward and fills me.
I let out a short, happy gasp at the size of him, the feel of his cock stretching me to the max.“Yes, Silas,” I sigh, digging my nails into his shoulderblades, as he moans his agreement.“God, I’ve missed this.”
“Me too,” he says, kissing my neck.His hips start to rock, just a few slow pumps before he’s already going full-force, slamming into me.He moves back, onto his knees, and holds my legs up.
“Yes, yes, yes,” I say, with every thrust.He withdraws almost to the tip, then fills me again, over and over.The ceiling above us turns black and starry, pinwheels of color coming into my vision as my orgasm grows closer.
“Come for me, Erin,” he whispers.“I know you’re close.I can feel it.”Silas picks up even more speed, more power, more depth; my pussy tightens and trembles uncontrollably within seconds.
“One,” he says, pausing, his voice low and mischievous, before his pace picks up again.He leans forward and sucks my nipple into his mouth, his tongue working the sensitive nub expertly.After a few minutes, he kisses his way to the other one.
My hands move to his head, pressing his mouth closer to my breasts, begging him for more.He bites down on the nipple, smiling as I cry out in pleasure that another orgasm is hitting.
“Two,” he says, and pulls his fully erect cock from my tight, dripping hole.“Get on top.”
I move to straddle him, immediately slamming myself down on him.I can’t go quite as fast as he did, but the new angle lets me take him even deeper; I watch his eyes flicker open and shut, the way his teeth rake his bottom lip as I move.
“You like it?” I ask, working my muscles to squeeze him extra tightly.“You like this?”
He nods, nearly speechless.“Your tits bouncing everywhere,” he moans.“I imagine that every night…I jerk off in the shower, thinking about you.”He places his hands on my hips, helping me move faster.“Thinking about this.”Silas extends his thumb, making contact with my extra-sensitive clit.He rubs it in hard, steady circles.
“Shit, Si…another one…”I barely get the words out before he rubs faster, bringing me to orgasm yet again.I throw my head back, shuddering as it takes over.
“Three.”His smile tells me he’s still not done.“Keep riding my cock,” he says, half-pleading, half-commanding.I oblige and obey.
“Now,” he says, breathing hard, and I wonder how close he is himself, “I want you…to tell me…exactly what…he did to you.”
I slow down.“What?Silas, no—”
“Tell me, Erin.”He grabs my hips tighter, making me move at the pace he wants.And, if I’m being honest with myself, the pace I want, too.“Describe it to me.”
I swallow hard, a little scared, but somehow turned on.Really turned on.“First…he put three fingers inside me.”
“Three,” he says, raising an eyebrow.“Bet that felt good, huh?”I don’t know what answer he’s looking for, but before I can stammer one out, he says, “But I bet he still couldn’t work your G-spot quite like I do.Can he.”
Silent, I shake my head.It isn’t easy to admit.Alex is good at everything we’ve done…but sex with him is nothing like it is with Silas, no matter how much I wish it were.
“Then what did he do?”
“He…put one finger in my ass,” I answer, my voice tight with nerves and anticipation, as Silas reaches up to my mouth and pushes one finger between my lips.
“Get it nice and wet for me, Erin.”His eyes look heavier now, darker.When he pulls his hand away, I brace myself.I shut my eyes, feeling the tip of his finger playing with my other hole.
“Do it, Silas,” I beg.“Please…please, put your finger in my ass.”
Silas laughs and, in one hard motion, pushes his finger deep inside.
“Fuck!” I gasp, and Silas laughs again as the pain gives way to pleasure.I start riding his cock again, as he works his finger around inside me.His other hand rubs my clit.
“Lean forward a little more,” he says and, when I do, sucks my nipple into his mouth again.Then the other, back and forth.Every part of me that can feel the electric charge of his touch the most, he works expertly, faster and faster, harder every second.
“I told you,” he says, biting his lip, “I was going to make you come harder than he did.”
“You did,” I agree, panting; I don’t know which of his actions will make me come first, but I can already tell this orgasm will be unlike any I’ve ever had before.I feel it building in every part of my body.All of my nerve endings are on fire, waiting for it.
“Nobody can fuck you like I can, Erin.”He stifles a whimper in his throat; I know the second my orgasm begins, he’ll finally let himself explode.“Say it.”
“Nobody can fuck me like you,” I tell him; then I say it again.And again.My mouth can’t be controlled anymore.
“That’s it, baby…God, that’s it, yeah.Keep saying it.Jesus, Erin…I’m so close…”Suddenly, Silas pushes his finger as deep into my ass as he can; he thrusts his hips upwards just as I come down onto his cock, slamming deep, stretching me; his teeth bite down on one of my nipples again; and his fingers on my clit rub furiously, harder and faster than I thought possible.
My scream pierces the air around us, washing across the high ceiling and the beautiful linens, as my orgasm begins.Silas moans with me; I feel his cock twitching inside of me.
“I’m coming, Erin,” he manages, breathless.
“Fill me up, Silas,” I gasp.The peaks of our orgasms hit simultaneously; we freeze, unable to move or speak as our bodies take control, as the pleasure reaches its height and washes over us.At the descent, we start to make noises, moans and half-words, the beginnings of each other’s names, that we can’t control, either.I put my hand over Silas’s mouth, and he clasps his hand over mine.
Finally, it’s over, our bodies trembling with the aftershocks.I lie down beside him, one of the thick summer drapes pulled across us.
“I love you, Erin,” he says, stroking my hair as my head rests on his chest.His heartbeat is loud and strong in my ear, as grounding as his voice and touch.I know it’s wrong to feel this way about him, to wish I could lie here with him forever.It’s all wrong—lying to Alex to sneak off with Silas, bringing him up here.Letting him kiss me...kissing him back.Everything, from the moment he arrived.But for some reason, I can't bring myself to fully regret any of it.
“I love you, too,” I whisper.For now, at least, I push my thoughts of Alex, any thoughts of right or wrong, away.All I want to focus on is Silas, the steady strength of his heart.
Silas traces my collarbone again, my ribcage.“You look so different,” he says.His voice sounds strangled.“So…sick.”
“I’m not,” I snap, suddenly annoyed.“I told you, I just finished treatment.Of course I look different.”
“Erin, relax.I know this isn’t the real you.It’s just…hard for me to see you like this, that’s all.”
I wait for him to add something, backtrack a little, but he doesn’t.
“Alex says I’m beautiful,” I challenge, pulling away.“He doesn’t care what I look like.”
“Jesus Christ, really?Are you serious right now?”Silas grabs my elbow, so bony in his hand, and pulls me back to him.“Obviously I don’t care, either, Erin.I just spent the better part of an hour fucking you.”He pauses, taking a breath.“Look, I just meant…I was just being honest.I’m sorry, but it’s true.You look sick.Or like you just finished being sick, you know?But it doesn’t change how I feel about you.”
“Fine.Let’s just drop it.”
“Sounds good to me,” he sighs.
We lie there a little longer, but all I can think about now is Alex, waiting for me downstairs.Maybe looking for me, sending Fiona or Aunt Jane into the bathrooms all over the mansion to find me.
I try to decide what I like better: Alex’s kindness, whether it’s totally genuine or not, or Silas’s complete and absolute honesty, even if it makes me feel like shit in the moment.It’s not an easy call.
“Guess you have to get back downstairs, huh?” he whispers, sounding sullen.
“Guess so.”
We help each other get dressed.I fix my hair as best I can, in the reflection of a silver tea tray Silas finds under the window.He holds it like a mirror, while I push bobby pins and loose hairs back into place.
“Thank you,” he says, suddenly.When I give him a confused glance, he adds, “For letting me explain myself.For…for not just sending me on my way, no chance to see you or anything.Honestly, that—that might’ve killed me.Having to see you with him and never knowing if you still…”Silas looks away, his voice trailing.
I glance at the floor, nodding.“I do still love you, Silas.And I’m glad we could talk.Like I said, I don�
�t know if I’ll forgive you or not.But at least there’s a chance now.”I look at him.“Now that I understand.Kind of.”
“If you had a kid of your own,” he says, gravely, “you’d understand.”
We’re silent a minute, studying each other, when a knock pounds on the door.
“Erin?You in here?”
I hold a finger to both our lips, shaking my head.We stay perfectly frozen and quiet, until finally, Fiona’s footsteps creak down the stairs.I hear her shout, “Not up here,” to Alex, down in the foyer.
“They’re probably worried about you,” he says against my finger.I pull it away, nodding, and look for my shoes.The heel of one is in the puddle we made.The one Silas brought out of me, from a place I didn't even know existed and still don't fully understand, like so much else.
“I’ll wait here,” he says, “’til everyone leaves.”He sits on the trunk, lacing up his boots with rigid, jerky motions.“I don’t want to get you in trouble or anything.Promise.Honestly, I…I didn’t plan on any of this happening.”
“Me neither,” I sigh, tucking my hair behind my ear.I slip my heels back on, listening for any steps outside.The hall’s empty.
“Bye, Erin,” he whispers, as I open the door and slip outside.
I take one final look at Silas, remembering the last time I did this—the last time I shut a door on him: his expression resigned but with a single spark, knowing I would leave, but hoping against every odd that I might keep the door open.That I might invite him through it, into my life again.
“Bye, Silas.”I keep my eyes on his as the door shuts, latching into place and closing us off, all over again.Just like last time, I realize, we don’t even kiss goodbye.
Chapter Three
“There you are!The reception’s been over for half an hour.Where were you?”
Alex looks half-worried, half-pissed.Without thinking, I say the one thing I know he won’t get angry about.
“I…I feel kind of sick.”