by CORY CYR
I piled our plates and the leftovers on the cart, leaving only the pitcher and our drinks. His arms reached out, and I bent to kiss him. “I need your lips to sustain me while you’re gone,” he murmured.
“Behave yourself,” I demanded, using his discarded shirt to swat him. My eyes followed his stare to where I could see the outline of his cock.
“You’d only know I was getting hard,” he stated, grabbing his dick, “if you were ogling. So you are just as naughty as I am. Now go change. I know we decided fucking in the ocean would be futile, but the pool, maybe easier?” he asked seductively.
I lowered my voice. “We can’t have sex out here, not in broad daylight. What if Anai sees us?”
“I’ll assume earth-shattering applause,” he mused arrogantly.”
“Oh, you are quite the comedian today. Just quench that thirst with iced tea, and I’ll be right back.” I rolled the cart to the sliding glass and pushed it into the kitchen.
“I would have gotten that for you, Miss Jensyn. Next time just use the intercom.”
I blushed. I’d forgotten the pool area had a speaker system. Hopefully, it was turned off. “I forgot about that. I had to change anyway. We’re going to take a swim and maybe walk the beach later,” I remarked, heading for the stairs.
“A swim, a walk,” she muttered under her breath. I turned just in time to see her standing with folded arms and a serious smirk. “I don’t think that man has swimming on his mind. And you would do best to take him up on anything he wants to do. Oh, he is a handsome one. And you were right. That picture on his book doesn’t do him justice. And he’s obviously smitten with you. You are one lucky woman.”
“Smitten. Really, Anai. Reading bodice-rippers again?” I asked, my eyebrows arching.
“He’s just so attentive. My husband was like that when we courted.”
Courted, smitten, is she eighty? “You know that may be only because he can’t see me. You understand that, right?”
“Don’t count yourself out just because you’re not that, whatever it was, ‘Perfect 10.’ Be happy such a man cares for you without his eyes. He’s judging you on your character, not this looks thing. If you ask me, that’s what is making all these young girls crazy, too much emphasis on weight, boobs, and face. You do understand there will always be someone more beautiful. But what you have inside is innately your own. That’s how he sees you. That is how he knows.”
I weighed her words, climbing the stairs. She was pretty damn smart. She roughly said what Lincoln had expressed. If others believed, why couldn’t I?
I changed into the new swimsuit I’d just purchased. I posed in front of the mirror. From the back, I looked perfect, unscathed. I grabbed a hat that would go with the suit and slipped on matching flip-flops. I didn’t know why the hat mattered. No one could see us. I removed it and brushed out my long hair, pulling it into a high pony. I slathered my face with sunscreen, then went back outdoors.
Lincoln had found his way to the edge of the pool. Blind or not, he would always be a risk taker. I walked down the pool steps and sat. “Kidney shaped or round?” he asked.
“Actually, kind of square and black. I had rock formations along with waterfalls placed all around the pool area to add decorative landscape. Give me your hand and let’s go sit in the hot tub. These old muscles need it.”
He waggled his sunglasses. “Too much aerobics? Better get used to it since banging you will be a daily thing.”
I gagged. “Excuse me? Are we reverting to the eighties? Bang again, seriously?” I took his hand as we padded to the Jacuzzi.
“Holy shit, are you trying to roast my nuts? It’s not Christmas, is it? Ouchy mama,” he said, sliding up to the edge.
“Hence the word hot tub.” I chuckled, sinking in to my neck. “By the way, I’ve never had roasted nuts.”
He ripped opened the Velcro on his trunks. “Care to sample the entree?”
“Put that thing away. Anai is old. You’ll give her a fright.” I laughed.
He sulked as he pressed his fly back together. “You are absolutely no fun. You expect me to be alone with you and not touch you. That’s just plain cold and undeserving. So how about we get in the pool and let my fingers do the walking…? Unless your housekeeper has goggles and can see underwater.”
I wouldn’t have submitted so easily, but his kisses, touches, and memories of him the night before made me slick with desire. My pussy ached with each delicious throb. He pushed himself upward and held out his hand. I clasped it, and he pulled me up into him. The hot water rushed over him as it dripped off me. He circled his arms around and crushed me into him, grinding every mouthwatering inch of his cock into me. Arousal slammed into me with such force I was ready to fall to my knees on hard concrete and suck him dry.
“Do you want me? Because you can feel how much I want you,” he whispered, warm breath licking the shell of my ear.
We strolled over to the stairs and walked into the pool until we were at the five-foot mark. He turned, embracing me once more as his hand slipped under the elastic of my bathing suit. He pulled my crotch to one side and delved with two fingers into my folds. I held on to him for dear life, my body screaming for him to go deeper. His lips nuzzled my earlobe. “Is this what you want? I can easily trade places and bury my cock in you.”
I sucked in a sob as two fingers crooked, strumming my clit. I kept one hand around his neck and reached below the surface of the water to stroke his erection.
“You think she’ll know if we come in the pool?” He groaned as I kept rubbing.
“Probably not, but I can’t make any guarantees about the pool boy,” I said, scraping my teeth along his shoulder. My core was now in drum mode as my flesh tingled and my legs began to feel like malleable clay. “I’m going to come. Go deeper,” I whispered as his fingers began fucking me with sudden fury. My spine tightened as relief spiraled upward. I ground my teeth, tears burning my eyes as my breath became short and uneven. He kissed me on the collarbone as I tore open his trunks and began fisting his length. “Come in my hand,” I said quietly. A few seconds later, I felt him grow and begin to tremble. I could barely tell the difference between his orgasm and the water sifting through my hand. But the feeling made my pussy clamp down on his fingers as I cried out in release.
“Well, I’ll go ahead and say it. We christened the pool. What’s next?” he spouted. I could still feel his fingers inside me. Testing, touching, and procuring every part of my body.
No wonder he could pen such explicit sex scenes. He mastered it. I suppose write what you know, and this man obviously knew women. I wondered how many others had known his touch and techniques and if any of them had loved him besides Kami.
“How long before the warden leaves?” he asked, finally removing his fingers while struggling to tuck himself back into his shorts.
“Very funny. She leaves after she makes dinner, usually about five.”
“She needn’t bother. I already know what I want to eat,” he said, picking me up. I slid down along his chest until my feet hit the bottom of the pool.
“You know you kind of have a one-track mind. I’m sure you’ve been told that before.”
He chuckled. “So sue me. I want to have sex with the woman I love nonstop. I almost lost you, and now that we have everything out in the open, I’m taking advantage of it. You won’t marry me, so can I at least pretend a honeymoon?”
I lightly slapped him on the chest. I assumed wanting to marry me was a last-ditch effort on his part to keep me from running. In truth, I would do it, but not until I felt confident enough that my appearance didn’t matter, and I already knew that would never happen.
We dried off, then lay on chaise lounges, talking. He revealed a possible plot for his next book. I reminded him before he even considered another book, he needed to see the doctor. The continual flashes that caused him agony were getting closer together and more intense.
“You make the appointment and I’ll go. You can come with m
e.”
There was no way we could be seen together, especially in such a public place. “I’ll have Lucas take you. I’m sure he wouldn’t mind.” I sighed. “Lincoln, it’s too public. Even if it weren’t because of you, I still wouldn’t go. I don’t like being so exposed. Please don’t make me feel guilty.”
“I hadn’t planned to.” He sat up in the chair, whipping his hand through his hair. “I know you’ve patterned your life for a long time, being private. But at some point, we should both be honest. What if I am blind forever?”
Works for me. I chastised myself for being so selfish. I knew full well what the proper response should be, but I wasn’t able to articulate it.
He swung his legs over the lounger toward me. “Wait. That would resolve everything for you. Your silence tells me it’s true. Wow, I wish I was surprised, but you previously admitted how you felt. I just thought maybe you changed your mind because I said I loved you and your appearance would never change that fact. You do know if we were on opposite ends of this scenario, I would always want the best for you. I suppose you and I have vastly different definitions of love.”
I sat up, reaching for him. “I’m a bad person. Is that what you want me to say? I’m narcissistic. For the first time in years, I feel as though I’m living an ordinary existence. I do love you, Lincoln, more than I thought possible, and that’s why I’m afraid. You’re saying these words to a woman you can’t see. What happens when your vision returns and the first thing you see is my horrible face? You say it won’t matter, but I’m terrified because I know it will.”
“Jesus, we’ve gone over this,” he spit out, his jaw ticking. “I’ll be honest. I may be shocked initially, and not because of your scars. But because I’ll be able to see all the pain, every single second of it since that accident. It’s one thing for someone to describe it and another to see it firsthand. But, baby, that’s not going to change any of this.” He pounded on his heart. “It doesn’t matter because you don’t believe a single word I say. I guess the proof will be if my sight returns. And if it doesn’t, then I’ll just have to live with the fact that you never trusted me.”
I sat next to him on the chair. “You’ve given so much. You provided me with stability I never thought I’d have. Honestly, being with you is the happiest I’ve ever been. Having someone like you love me, sometimes it feels surreal.”
His hand found my face, and he cupped my cheek. “Look, I feel everything you do. Do you think it hasn’t crossed my mind that if I'm truly blind, permanently, I’d become a hardship to you? You would forever have to care for me. Sure, I can do shit for myself. But there are a million other things I always took for granted. These are the tasks you’d have to undertake.”
“You would never be a hindrance. I love doing things for you. It makes me feel like I have value.”
“Okay, then we complement each other. You are worth everything to me. So don’t ever think it’s me in doubt, because it’s only you who has second thoughts. Me loving you, I’ve never been so sure about anything in my life. I just want to give you the life you’ve earned. Never confuse me with those assholes who abandoned you in your time of need. This can work, Jensyn, because we have each other.”
“No matter what happens, always know I do love you,” I said softly.
His expression turned serious. “You promised you wouldn’t leave me, and I’m holding you to it.”
I won’t have to honor that promise because you’ll leave me in the end.
Chapter 16
We soaked up the sun, and I swore Lincoln nodded off for a while. He appeared quiet behind his shades. No matter how splendid our time was together, the minute our conversations turned serious, we both became agitated. Of course, I was the protagonist. I’d been fighting against myself too long, and considering my age, my ways were set in stone. As much as I loved him, I would always feel as though I wasn’t good enough, and many would second that notion.
“Miss Jensyn, I made a lobster salad for dinner. It’s chilling, and there are dark rolls to go with it. I assumed after the hot day you had, you’d want a cold meal.” She smirked with amused awareness.
Oh God, she knows.
I pushed up my sunglasses and pulled my hat down farther. I wished I could cover my face with the towel, but that would be a sign of admittance. “Thanks so much for everything. If you want, you can leave early. I’ve got it from here.”
“Uh-huh, I have no doubt.” She laughed as I threw my towel at her.
“I’m sure your husband misses you. In fact, take tomorrow off. Go be with your man so I can spend time with mine in peace,” I said in a whisper, not wanting to wake him.
She seemed surprised and eager. “If you’re sure? The entire house with you two only. How will you spend your time?”
“Will you just go and quit giving me grief?”
“I’m happy for you. He has no idea how lucky he is.”
I heard a quiet retort after she left. “So I’m your man?”
His voice startled me. He’d listened to the entire conversation. “You were eavesdropping?”
“Kind of hard not to. You sound like two cackling hens, especially when you’re trying to keep quiet. I get the feeling she saw us, you know, in the pool.”
“You think?” I sighed, smacking his arm.
“You sure like to physically mark me. I may have to make that quid pro quo. Of course, I’m not into that bondage shit and weirdo crap. I like my sex like Neapolitan ice cream, some vanilla, a taste of something darker, and a sweet and happy ending. And just to confirm, I know I’m lucky. How many men get to fall in true love with their first sexual release?”
“Thanks for that analogy. I guess I’ll never look at ice cream the same again. I’m more of a sorbet person anyway.”
“I can get into that if you let me.” He breathed the words out slowly and sensually.
“You are a dirty boy, aren’t you?”
“I never claimed to be virtuous. Women like nice with a twist of intrigue.” He stretched, then sat. “I slept too long; now I feel lazy. What time is it anyway?”
I shook my head, standing. “Maybe three or four. Let’s go down to the beach. I have a cabana,” I murmured. “Then we can grab dinner.”
“Dinner sounds great. Now let’s go investigate this cabana.” He chuckled.
I took his hand and grabbed both towels. I handed him flip-flops as I slipped on mine. The path to my beach was less treacherous, but the sand was hot. In a few minutes, we were on the landing overlooking the crystal-clear, bluish-green tropical waters, which reminded me of Lincoln’s eyes. I had modeled my cabana after Arabian Nights. Sheer pastel curtains with a solid cherry roof and a sprawling sofa and double lounger in matching colors. This was where I came to read and sit quietly. It was my haven.
I guided him to the sofa. “Wow, this feels luxurious. Wish I could see it.”
I placed a pillow behind his head and spent the next few minutes describing everything.
“Let’s go in the ocean. I assume it’s an easier trek than the shore at my place.”
We removed our shoes and strolled hand in hand to the water’s edge. “It’s very flat now, no sets at all,” I mentioned, coaxing him into the warm water.
“You do surf, don’t you?”
“I used to, when I was young. But everyone was always freaked out I’d get injured. A cut, a bruise, any kind of damage would have sent the makeup people into a tizzy. If I’d known what the future held for me, I would have continued. I did enjoy it.”
“It’s never too late,” he said, splashing. “When we decide what our plans are, you can do whatever you want.”
“Maybe. We’ll see. I’m thinking I’m a little old now to be hanging ten.”
“Hey, if I’m willing to relearn all the sports I love now that I’m blind, you can do this. We can brush up on our outdoor activities together. I’m looking forward to doing everything with you. The optimum word being looking.” His teeth glimmered with a grin
.
My body stiffened. I tried to anticipate his reaction to seeing me the first time. I knew he wanted to show acceptance, but would I see a flinch or recoil? He expressed he could visualize my face with his hands, but I would never believe it was the same. I knew for certain he believed what he said and meant it. But those words came easily when he couldn’t perceive the horror. I doubted his fingers could touch the depth of my injuries or actually observe every scar. No matter how my face was described, it would never compare to someone actually seeing it directly.
I knew not only would it break my heart, but it would kill him inside if he couldn’t disguise his revulsion. It had taken me years to look at my own reflection. My room had been vacant of mirrors until recently. I suppose I had Dr. Bass to thank for that. I had quite a few things to be grateful to him for. No matter how content I was, somehow that feeling of being unworthy encompassed me. It was that emotion that always rose to the surface, suffocating my thoughts. Even if Lincoln never regained his sight, my fears would eventually drive him away. I assumed love would never be strong enough to hold him.
“You’re in deep thought, and judging from the last week, that’s not a good thing. You need to stop feeling with your thoughts and feel with your soul. Don’t be so worried about tomorrow; just be happy for today. What we have now is just the precursor to tomorrow. I’m going to surprise you by giving you the dream you had as a little girl.”
I crossed my arms with a laugh. “How do you know what I wished for when I was a kid?”
He shot me an all-knowing look, as if he were God. I supposed celestial beings could wear Ray Bans. “All little girls want a prince. Okay, not claiming to be one. Well, maybe a king… Okay, how about a duke?” I nudged him with my elbow. “Didn’t you want to be swept away, like in a fairytale, and treated like a princess?”
“Actually, I was busy as hell when I was ten. I hardly recall any of my childhood since I began modeling at two. I guess I didn’t know what I wanted. Maybe I still don’t.”
