The Darkest Of Light

by Sandy Alvarez

  My roommate or lack thereof is still a no-show. In a way it’s nice not having to worry about any of my habits bothering someone. That being said, I hate being in this room alone at night, even though it’s in a campus dorm full of students. I spent as long as I could hanging out at the library after class so I wouldn’t have to go back and be alone.

  Nights have been the worst part. I’ve not been sleeping well, and I almost dozed off in class this morning. Sam caught me before I face planted onto the laptop sitting on my desk. Thankfully, I only had the one class today and now I’m heading back to my room. Sam convinced me and Leah last night that we should all go out tonight. I plan on relaxing and maybe even get a couple hours of sleep.

  Once I enter my floor, I hear Jessica my RA call out to me.

  "Alba, wait up a second."

  I met her my first day and she is very sweet. Every morning this week she has stopped by to say hello and kept me up-to-date on my roommate situation. When I turn around she is walking towards me with a vase full of white lilies and a smile on her face.

  "These were sitting outside your door this morning," she says handing them to me. "I didn’t know when you would be back today and didn’t want them to get knocked over just sitting there on the floor, so I kept them for you."

  Who would be sending me flowers? Taking them from her I notice the small envelope attached. Before I can inspect any further Jessica grabs my attention again.

  "Oh, the roommate you were supposed to have this semester finally called. She ended up finding off-campus housing, so it looks like you’ll have the room all to yourself." She cheerfully tells me.

  I suppose most people would like to have a room to themselves but, for me not so much, which got me to thinking about the other night when Leah mentioned she is not getting along with her roommate.

  "Is it possible for a student to be reassigned to another room by request?" I ask her.

  "Well, I suppose so. I mean as long as the request is approved by student housing."

  "Great. Thanks, Jessica."

  Too curious to wait until I get to my room, I pluck the small envelope from amongst the flowers and pull the small card from inside of it and read—

  To my beautiful Alba.

  That’s it? I flip the card over and the other side is blank.

  My sister wouldn’t send me flowers saying something like that and Gabriel doesn’t seem like the type of guy to send flowers. I’m baffled.

  "Are they from your boyfriend? They’re very pretty." Jessica asks.

  "I don’t have a boyfriend," I mumble

  "As pretty as you are you don’t have a boyfriend? Ooh, you have a secret admirer. That’s romantic."

  No, it’s creepy.

  I set the flowers down on a table to my left against the wall in the hallway. I don’t know why, but I want nothing to do with them.

  "You don’t want your flowers?" Jessica calls out to me as I continue towards my room.

  "I’m allergic," I lie.

  "Oh. Well, okay. See you later, Alba."

  Upon entering my dorm room something feels off. Glancing around I see everything is how it was when I left this morning. Why am I being so paranoid? This is ridiculous. I chuck my bag over onto the empty bed and sit down. Taking a deep breath and yawning I decide to lay down for a few minutes and rest.

  I’m woken by a soft knocking on the door. Rubbing my eyes, I sit up and look at the clock hanging on the wall. 1:00pm? I slept for four hours? Getting up I open the door and see Leah is standing there.

  "Hey, I tried texting you a few times, but you never replied back." She says.

  "Sorry, I fell asleep. I’ve been so tired lately, but I didn’t mean to sleep so long. Come on in." Leah walks in and sits down on my bed.

  "I figured we could get some lunch together before meeting up with Sam later."

  "Sure, I’m pretty hungry. Let me freshen up really quick and we can go." I tell her with a smile. I feel better. The four-hour nap helped.

  Finishing up in the bathroom, I grab my light blue cardigan pulling it on. We leave the room and make our way out of the dorm. Halfway toward the campus food court, Sam comes jogging up to us.

  "Hey ladies," he greets, giving us his signature smile that usually makes all girls fawn all over him. "You both still game for going out?"

  I look over at Leah who looks to me. I shrug my shoulders. I do need to see more of what this town has to offer beside the confines of the campus.

  "I’m still game. How about you, Leah? You still want to come out with us tonight?"

  Tugging at her oversized shirt she replies, "I guess so. I mean, I don’t have anything to wear, but..."

  "How about we stop by your room after lunch. You can grab some clothes and come back to my place to get ready with me?" I ask her.

  Her face brightens with my invitation and she quickly answers, "That would be great. Thanks."

  "Sam, meet us outside our building about 6 o’clock?"

  Agreeing, he takes off in the opposite direction, and I turn toward Leah.

  "Let’s go."

  After grabbing some chicken club sandwiches and a couple bags of chips, I walk with Leah to her room. I stand in the doorway and wait as she gathers some of her things into a bag when her roommate comes bouncing in with her friend in tow.

  "Oh, you’re here." The girl says in a snotty tone, before turning towards me.

  "Oh my gosh, you are so pretty. Hi, my name is Stacy. You ever thought of trying out for the cheer team? You would fit right in." She says with too much enthusiasm.

  "No, it’s not my thing." I tell her, scrunching up my nose.

  "Oh. I’m the cheer captain. I thought maybe you were here to see me." She sure is self-absorbed.

  "No, I’m here with my friend Leah."

  "You’re here with her? As in you two are friends?" She gawks with serious disbelief on her face. With her manicured finger pointed at my friend she adds. "Why would you be friends with her, she’s such a dork." The bitch and her friend giggle at the insult directed at Leah and it’s pissing me off. Especially when I see my friend shrink away. This is another reason I don’t fit in here. I will never understand such immature and petty behavior.

  "Yes, we’re friends. We’re going out with Sam McGregor tonight," I smile, giving a little attitude along with my tone. Did I have a reason to tell her our plans? No. But every girl at this school vies for Sam’s attention. And I might have wanted to make her jealous. My sister did tell me, sometimes people needed to be brought down a peg or two. To be put in their place. And by the stunned look on these two girls’ faces, it worked.

  "Sam McGregor? The quarterback of the football team?" The other cheerleader chimes.

  Completely ignoring them I ask Leah, "You ready?"

  "Yes," she says.

  "Great."

  Without another word, we leave. I hate superficial, stuck up people like that. I don’t like when others purposefully try to make another feel they aren’t good enough. With the brief encounter I had with her roommate, I can see why Leah doesn’t like her.

  As we walk back to my room I nudge her shoulder, "Hey, don’t let girls like her or anyone else get to you. Her opinions don’t make you who you are."

  She nods her head at my statement. Leah is beautiful. Even though she does try to hide herself behind baggy clothes and large glasses, she’s gorgeous. She doesn’t see it though. I hope I can lift her spirits with a little girl time.

  Back in my room we sit on my bed and I pull out our sandwiches and we eat in silence until Leah speaks up.

  "Thank you for what you did back there. It’s hard for me to stick up for myself. When I try no one ever takes me seriously, so I usually don’t say anything."

  "I’ve only known you for a week and I know you’re a good person, Leah. Forget them if they don’t see that. And you’re beautiful. They’re just jealous, that’s all." Chewing her food, she shakes her head before taking a swallow of her water.

  "I’m no
t beautiful."

  "Are you kidding? I would die to have the curves you have. You are gorgeous. You remind me of those fifties pin-up models. Let me do your hair and makeup for tonight. What did you bring to wear?"

  Setting her food down on my nightstand, she gets up and grabs her bag from the bed and pulls out two separate outfits. Both are oversized shirts and leggings, like she has on now. Frowning, I look at her.

  "Do you have any dresses?"

  "No. This is what I wear. It’s what I’m comfortable in."

  I’m pretty sure she could wear something I have. I get up and start digging through my clothes.

  "I have plenty of stuff you could borrow."

  "I don’t know about that. I’m much bigger than you are."

  Peeking around my armoire I look at her.

  "Trust me, I know I’ll find something in here. I love to shop and I made sure I brought a variety of clothes with me."

  Spotting the dress I was looking for, I pull it out and let her look at it. It’s a deep blue A-line cotton summer dress with a heart shaped neckline. I haven’t worn it yet. I bought it the last time I went shopping with my sister and her friend Mila, just before my nineteenth birthday.

  "Try this on."

  "My boobs are not going to fit in that dress, let alone the rest of me," she says.

  "It will work, I promise. Please try it on." I plead. I know she’s uncomfortable but I’m certain if I can get her to see for herself, she may change her mind a little. Relenting after staring at the dress and twisting her shirt in her hands, she gets up and reaches for the dress. Taking it, she walks into the bathroom closing the door.

  I’m left sitting on the edge of my bed munching on my bag of chips for several minutes waiting for her to come out. Finally, the doorknob turns and she steps out, pulling at the fabric of the dress that’s molded to her body.

  "You look great!" I beam. She does, it looks fantastic on her. It’s not as short on her as it would have been on me because I’m a few inches taller than she is, but it works.

  "I’ve never worn anything this revealing before. I’ve never worn a dress before," she nervously tells me. "Are you sure my boobs won’t pop out?" She starts fidgeting with the neck line, pulling on it.

  "I have a white cardigan that you can wear over it if that would make you feel more comfortable. And if you really don’t want to wear it, you don’t have to."

  Walking over to the full-length mirror on the wall she stands and looks at herself. "I love it. I know I may seem ungrateful but I’m not. I come from a very strict religious family, Alba. I was always told to cover up, that I shouldn’t tempt others with my body. So this is very new for me, but I really like how it looks."

  Leah hasn’t talked about her family, and I’ve not asked. I figured she’d tell me what she wants me to know, but I’m guessing by the statement she just made, I’m not going to like anything she tells me.

  "Will you help me find something to wear? I can be very indecisive when it comes to clothes." I ask, trying to lighten the mood and get her to have a little fun with the whole experience.

  Smiling at me she walks over to the pile of clothes I made on my bed and examines everything.

  "You love the color blue, don’t you?" She laughs as she picks up a soft baby blue summer dress that has a pale blue lace overlay.

  "This one is super pretty. I say wear this one." Her eyes gleam.

  "Great, I love this dress. First, we need to do our makeup and hair."

  We spend the next couple hours laughing and getting ready before its time to meet Sam outside. We both decide to wear our hair down and I curled mine. Leah has natural curly ringlets so all she needed was a little product for frizz control, but other than that she has perfect hair. I’m feeling good and beautiful. My mood has a lot to do with it. I haven’t felt this carefree in awhile. I’m looking forward to going out tonight.

  As soon as we step outside, Sam is there waiting on us. He is wearing a pair of skin hugging jeans, boots, and a black button up Henley. Sam is a good-looking guy. I don’t understand why he doesn’t have a steady girlfriend and prefers hanging with me and Leah most days. Turning around, a smile lights up his face.

  "Damn. Look at you two. Leah, I knew you had some killer curves under those baggy ass clothes. Damn girl."

  His words cause her to blush and pull the cardigan closed.

  "So, where are we going tonight?" I ask.

  "I heard about this place called Crossroads. Some guys on the team said they have good food and live music. What do ya say? Wanna check it out?" I didn’t get dressed up for nothing. I link my arm through Leah’s.

  "No better time to experience new things than in college, right?"

  "Let’s take my truck tonight. And everything is on me. I invited the two of you, so I’m paying."

  As we drive to the bar I’m taking in the scenery when I hear the rumble of a motorcycle. My heart starts racing and I instinctively search out the source. Riding up from the passenger side of Sam’s truck, I watch as the guy comes into view. I hold my breath until I realize it’s not who I was thinking of. This biker is nowhere close to the size Gabriel is.

  "Alba, are you okay? You look a little tense over there?" Sam asks.

  Letting out a long breath I reply, "Yeah, I’m fine. Thought I saw someone I knew was all."

  Determined to have a good time, I push all thoughts of Gabriel and home out of my head. I need to stop thinking about him.

  Pulling into a parking spot, Sam turns the truck off.

  "Ready to have some fun tonight ladies?"

  "Definitely." Leah and I both answer. Her voice filled with nerves and mine filled with determination.

  Chapter Six

  Gabriel

  I’m sitting at the clubhouse tossing back a few beers with Quinn and Reid after a long ass day at the shop, when I feel a hand slide up my arm. Turning my head, I see a chick with brown shoulder length hair, brown eyes, and fake ass tits hanging out of a scrap of material she calls a shirt. She’s the new club pussy Liz brought around last week, and I don’t have it in me to care what the fuck her damn name is. I haven’t paid the bitch any mind since she walked through the clubhouse door a week ago. Not from lack of trying on her part.

  "Hey, Gabriel,” she purrs. "You want some company tonight?"

  "Fuck off." I bark, pulling my arm free from her grasp. Feeling her hands on me causes my skin to crawl.

  She huffs and storms off across the room in her too tall heels that make her wobble back over to where Liz is tentatively watching.

  "You okay, brother?" Reid asks, taking a pull of his beer while sitting on the stool beside me.

  "Fine," I grumble. Only...I’m not fine. My mind is still reeling from seeing Santino at the fight three weeks ago. It’s been seven years since I last saw him, and I can’t for the life of me figure out why the fuck he would be in here. I know Santino is heavy into the fighting scene, but to show up at a meaningless fight in the middle of a small town in Montana is a far cry from what goes down in Miami. Most people don’t realize how much money can be made in underground fighting. But for him to show up in nowhere, fucking Montana. Maybe it’s just one hell of a coincidence. But I’d bet my left nut it’s not.

  On top of all that shit, I haven’t been able to get ahold of my sister Leyna for the past two weeks. I call her at least every other day. She answers nearly every time. There is a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach that something is not right. I reached out to a cousin of ours that lives several cities over. He agreed to go to Leyna’s house and check on her for me. Hopefully, I hear back from him soon.

  I hate that my sister is so far from me. I’ve been working on bringing her to the U.S., but these things take time. She insisted on staying in Cuba with our mother while she was still alive, but since her passing we have started all the necessary steps to move her here. I miss my sister terribly. Even though we have been apart for so long, we are still as close as ever. I tell her everything. We have no
secrets. Leyna knows about the club. She even knows about Alba. My sister is the only person I confide in entirely. She also told me I was an idiot for what I did and if she were here she’d kick my ass for the way I treated Alba. My sister has been encouraging me to go to her and to fix what I’ve done, but I informed her the damage has already been done.

  "You plannin’ on fightin’ again?" Reid asks, bringing me out of my thoughts.

  Shrugging my shoulders, "If I get the itch and they get some decent competition I will."

  "There are better ways to relieve stress, than beating the shit out of someone," Quinn chimes in, nodding to the direction of Liz and her new minion. I choose to ignore the asshole. Quinn is doing what he does best. He’s trying to goad a reaction out of me. I see the knowing smirk on his face. Instead, I turn my attention back to Reid.

  "I may need you to look into something for me. I haven’t heard from my sister in a couple weeks. If I don’t hear something by tomorrow, I want you to see what you can find out for me."

  "Has she ever gone radio silent on you before?" He asks with a look of concern on his face. My brothers know about my sister, and how close we are.

  "No. She’s never not answered my calls," I insist. "Something about this isn’t sittin’ right with me. I have a cousin checking up on her, he’s supposed to get back with me tomorrow. If he comes back with nothing, I want you to see what you can find."

  "You got it, brother. Give me everything you have on her, and I’ll see what I can do."

  "Got another favor, man. I want you to get me everything you can on a Miguel Santino. This guy is big into drugs. I’m not sure the level, but my guess is he’s big time, based out of Miami. He’s also heavy into the fight scene."

  "Is this something for the club, or is it personal?" Reid inquires.

  I shake my head, "This is personal."

  I see the questioning look on his face, he wants to ask more, but respects my privacy enough not to.

  "Alright, brother, I’ll start digging tonight and get with you tomorrow."