A Beautiful Mess

by T. K. Leigh

  “Well, at least you ordered good tequila or I’d be heaving already,” Bridget said.

  “Nothing but the best for me. Life is too short to waste it on shitty alcohol.”

  “You should make a tee shirt with that saying on it,” Kiera choked out with tears in her eyes, clearly having trouble stomaching the tequila.

  “It’s going to be a good night, I can tell.”

  ~~~~~~~~~~

  “I need to use the little girls room,” Olivia said several hours later, standing from their table. She headed to the bathroom only to be met with a line snaking around the long corridor. Scowling, she decided to go to the second floor to see whether that line was any better. Olivia climbed up the stairs, which proved to be slightly more challenging than usual, owing to her chunky heels and the drinks she had consumed. She made her way down the dark back hallway, thankful to see no line at the ladies’ room. When she finished up and exited, someone grabbed her arm, pushing her against the wall.

  “You’ve been ignoring me all night,” Simon breathed, using his body to crush Olivia’s to the wall, pinning both arms on either side of her head with his hands.

  “I haven’t been ignoring you. I’ve been spending some time with my friends. Get off me so I can go back to them,” Olivia replied forcefully, trying to hide the fact that, in all actuality, she was rather frightened. Simon had never been that aggressive with her before.

  As she stood there in his grasp, she silently hoped someone would come to use the restroom soon so that Simon would let her go. She was not sure if she should tell him that she was done with him, given her current predicament.

  Simon kept her pinned to the wall for what seemed like an eternity as he looked down on her, licking his lips like an animal stalking his prey.

  “Simon, please,” Olivia begged, terror flashing in her big brown eyes.

  “Oh, Livvy. You really are beautiful when you beg.” He planted rough kisses against her jaw line, grinding his hips against hers as he crushed her against the wall.

  “Simon, I’m not going to ask you again. Please, let me go.” Olivia closed her eyes, not wanting to look into his eyes anymore. She tried to free herself from his grasp, to no avail. He was definitely much stronger than her.

  “What’s going on here?” a familiar, deep voice broke through. Olivia opened her eyes looking for the source of the voice. A wave of relief washed over her.

  “Simon, please,” Olivia whispered, glaring at him, her vindication returning.

  “Fine. Stupid whore.” He released her and stumbled down the hallway onto the dance floor.

  “We’re done, Simon,” she said, raising her voice so it was clear that it was over between them. He didn’t even turn around, but it was obvious he heard her when he raised his right hand and flipped Olivia off.

  She let out a huge breath and turned to the source of the voice, staring into the dark eyes of one of her old college friends.

  “Mo,” Olivia said.

  “You picked a real winner this time, Livvy.”

  Olivia usually hated when people call her Livvy, but Mo was the exception to the rule. The only other person who ever called her Livvy was her father and Mo reminded Olivia so much of him, right down to the name. Giacomo. Most of his friends called him Jack, but Olivia called him Mo.

  “Yeah, I know.” Olivia walked over to Mo and into his arms, happy to see one of her oldest friends again. She felt a calming feeling as she stayed in his embrace, the memory of the night they met making her smile. Olivia worked at an area bar that his band played at. One evening, before the bar opened, she had finished her prep work early when she noticed that the band had already set up their gear. The bar was empty, so she stepped up to the piano and sang one of her favorite songs.

  It was a song that reminded Olivia of her parents. Something about that moment made it seem like the right thing to do. Maybe her parents were looking down from above because, unbeknownst to her, Mo had been watching the performance. He was very impressed with her voice and asked her to sing a few songs with his band. She agreed, and throughout her years at Boston College, she always jumped on stage for a few numbers with the guys.

  She hadn’t seen Mo since she graduated and fled Boston. Olivia pushed him away after graduation, just like she pushed away everyone she was close to. If you keep everyone at a distance, you can’t ever really lose them, she thought.

  “It’s good to see you, Mo. Really good. It’s been too long.” She pulled out of Mo’s embrace and looked into his eyes, overwhelmed with a thousand emotions from seeing her dear friend once again.

  “It has been too long. Five years, if I remember correctly.” He eyed Olivia, his eyebrows raised. She lowered her head, feeling guilty for never getting in touch with Mo once she came back to the city. And for cutting him out of her life in the first place. “I’m glad you’re back in Boston, but please stop dating assholes like that. You know I think of you like a little sister and the next guy that treats you like less than a princess, I’m going to have to kill him, and I really don’t want to go to prison right now. At least, not until the band performs tonight.” He winked at Olivia, their eyes nearly even from both of them being the same height.

  “You know I don’t do the relationship thing, Mo.”

  “I know you don’t, but that still doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be treated well, no matter what your relationship is with someone.”

  “Still teaching?” Olivia wanted to change the subject from her inability to have healthy relationships with people, something Mo was all too aware of.

  “Yup. Instilling musical ability into the minds of our children on a daily basis. It pays the bills while I slum around on the weekends with the band, playing bars,” he joked. Mo had been teaching music at the elementary school level for as long as Olivia had known him.

  “You guys are playing tonight?” she asked with her eyebrows raised and her arms crossed.

  “We sure are.” He smiled, running his hand through his dark hair. “When did you get back into town?” he asked, changing the subject back to Olivia. He knew her too well and was more than aware of all her tricks.

  “I’ve been living here for a year now,” she admitted.

  “You’ve been back a year and never got in touch with me? I’m hurt.” He placed his hands over his heart, faking a broken heart.

  “I know. I know. I’m a horrible friend.”

  “Well, I’ve known you were back,” he smiled. “Kiera can’t keep her mouth shut.”

  She laughed. That sounded like her friend. “She planned this, didn’t she?”

  He remained speechless while Olivia glared at him.

  “You have a terrible poker face. You know that, right?”

  Mo shrugged. “Come on, baby girl. Get back on stage with us. It’ll make you feel better.” He flashed his brilliant teeth, made even brighter against his olive-toned skin.

  Olivia sighed, thinking about the last time she played with the guys. Her mind immediately flash-backed to that awful time in her life. Graduation. Wanting to celebrate that milestone of her life and having everything ripped out from underneath her feet. Again.

  “Come on, Livvy,” he pled while gently touching her arm, comforting her. “It’ll be good for you. You need to start playing again. And in front of bigger crowds than at Open Mic night.” He raised his eyebrows at her.

  Of course. Kiera must have told him about Open Mic. She totally planned this, she thought. “Fine,” Olivia huffed.

  Mo hadn’t seen Olivia in years, but it was like nothing had changed. He knew she was starting to shut down.

  But Olivia’s past was too painful to think about, so shutting down was the only way she could continue to survive. At that point, Olivia just wanted to survive.

  CHAPTER TWO

  A GOOD NIGHT TURNED BAD

  “THANK you!” Mo shouted to a captive audience that had swelled in size over the last hour. “Now, for a little surprise. In the audience tonight is our good friend, Mis
s Olivia Adler!”

  The crowd roared at the mention of her name. Butterflies started to form in Olivia’s stomach, nervous energy coursing through her body. Kiera grabbed her hand, knowing that she still got nervous before she performed.

  “Those of you who have been following us for the past several years know that she used to sing with us. What do you all think about getting her up here to sing again?” The decibel level in the club sky-rocketed.

  Olivia walked through the crowd and climbed onstage, looking over the sea of people standing in the large, dark room, illuminated only by the bright lights of the stage. She immediately wondered why she had agreed to get onstage with Mo and the guys again. The room was packed with hundreds of people, all standing shoulder to shoulder, enthusiastically cheering for Olivia as she made her way to the center of the stage.

  Taking a deep breath, she closed her eyes and shut everything out, finding her calm. She slowly opened her eyes and smiled as she walked up to the microphone, ready for her performance. “How’s everyone doing tonight?” she shouted to overwhelming cheers. “I think we’re going to take it back a little bit. For those of you who came to watch us when we gigged at a great little bar called Scotch, this will bring back some memories. Hit it.” With that, the familiar sound of The Rolling Stones’ Honkey Tonk Woman filled the bar. Olivia was back where she felt most comfortable and loved it. She could forget about her past and just live in the moment of the music.

  She looked over the crowd and saw Kiera, Melanie, and Bridget enjoying the performance. The entire bar rocked out to their rendition of the classic tune. It felt great knowing that she could bring joy to complete strangers with a simple performance.

  Growing up, her happiest memories revolved around music. She could barely remember her parents, but she did remember sitting with her mother at the piano in the great room, playing and singing together. Olivia’s mother tried to teach her to play piano when she could barely walk. Even at a young age, there was something about certain melodies that spoke to her.

  After her parents died and she was sent to a boarding school, Olivia continued to learn everything she could about music, becoming proficient at a wide variety of instruments and excelling, particularly, at piano. Throughout middle school and high school, she was involved in musical theater groups and sang with various bands. There was something about performing that always calmed her. It almost felt as if she could be someone else for a short period of time.

  They finished their rendition of Honky Tonk Woman and Olivia took a quick bow, thanking the audience for their enthusiasm. She climbed down the stage and the crowd started chanting her name, “Libby! Libby! Libby!” She looked over toward Kiera, who was jumping up and down, clapping and chanting along with the crowd. She was in complete shock at the people shouting her name.

  “I think they want an encore, Miss Olivia,” Mo said into the microphone. Olivia walked back to her microphone and shouted into it, “Do you want to hear something else?” The crowd roared in approval. “Okay. Who am I to disappoint my adoring fans?” The liquor she had consumed throughout the evening had made her brave and maybe a little cocky.

  She walked over to Mo to confer with him about what to perform next. When he told her what he wanted to do, she laughed, glancing over at the enthusiastic crowd, knowing immediately that they would thoroughly enjoy what he had planned.

  “Here’s another one that we usually save until later in the night,” Mo said into the microphone. “But since we have Olivia up here, I figured it would be nice to actually have a female singing the high part instead of Marcus having to suffer through that.” The crowd laughed as he looked to Marcus, the band’s piano and guitar player. “Let’s rock it.” Dale, the drummer, counted off and the band went into Meatloaf’s Paradise by the Dashboard Light. The crowd danced and sang along, the men singing with Mo and the women singing with Olivia.

  She ended up finishing the set with the band. Afterwards, the bartender sent a round of tequila shots to the stage for the reunited band and they obligingly took their shots together. “Here’s to Groove Delay finally being back together,” Willy, the bass player, shouted, raising his empty shot glass.

  “It’s definitely good to be back singing with y’all.” Olivia looked around at the guys that she practically lived with during her college years. Besides Kiera, they were the only family she had left, although she had shut them out of her life the past several years. Why she had waited that long to see them again, she had no idea.

  “So, will you sing with us once in a while?” Mo asked with a hopeful look on his face.

  “You know I can’t tell you no,” Olivia replied coyly. She wrapped her arms around Mo. “Thank you,” she whispered into his ear so no one could hear.

  “You know I love you, baby girl.” Mo squeezed her tight and gave her a quick kiss on the cheek. She pulled away, happy to have reconnected with him.

  “Well, I should probably get back to Kiera and the girls before they leave without saying good-bye. Mo, let me know about rehearsals. I’ll see you all soon, I promise.” She gave Mo her cell number before waving to the guys, thankful to be able to perform with the band again.

  Olivia walked through the large dance floor area as she searched for her friends. People kept stopping her, saying how much they loved the performance. A few people gave her a beer or shot and, while she knew it wasn’t the smartest idea to take drinks from people she didn’t know, Olivia felt invincible and on top of the world.

  “You were amazing!” Melanie screamed as she wrapped her arms around Olivia once she had finally found her friends milling about the downstairs bar. “I had no idea you could sing like that!”

  “Me neither,” Bridget said, handing Olivia yet another shot.

  “Thanks girls.” The four friends raised their shot glasses and downed more tequila. At that point, they all had more than enough liquor in their systems. Olivia was not drunk, but she was definitely buzzed, or so she thought.

  No. She was drunk.

  “So, are you going to gig with them on a regular basis again?” Kiera looked at Olivia, raising her eyebrows.

  “I think so. It felt good.”

  “Good.”

  The girls left the bar, it being long after last call. They stood on the relatively empty street and said their good-byes. Olivia waved, telling her friends that she had to go back to her office to grab her laptop and a few other things before she headed home for the night. Kiera gave her a worried look.

  “I’ll text you the second I get home. I promise!” Olivia said, turning down the street as her friends piled in a cab.

  Olivia walked the few blocks from the bar to her office in her own little world. She kept replaying the night in her mind. She finally started to feel happy for the first time in years. Maybe it was okay to start letting people back in again.

  Olivia reached the building and recalled Jerry telling her that the front doors were locked at ten o’clock every night so she would need to use the night entrance on the side of the building. She walked past the front doors and turned the corner. As Olivia looked down into her purse to find the keycard that would grant her access to the night entrance, someone grabbed her around the waist and pinned her body, face first, against the brick building opposite her own office building, slamming her head against the hard wall.

  “We meet again beautiful.” Fear rushed through Olivia’s body as her head began to ache and her vision became blurry.

  “Simon, please. Leave me alone,” she pled, her heart racing.

  “Come on, Livvy. You weren’t very nice to me before sweetheart,” he slurred his words. Even drunk, he was stronger than Olivia.

  “You’re drunk. You’ll regret this tomorrow. Just let me go.” Blood began to trickle down her face. Olivia realized that Simon must have slammed her head pretty hard.

  “You’re making it difficult for me to do my job,” he growled, pressing her even harder against the wall.

  “What job is that, Simon?�
�� Olivia decided the best thing to do was to just keep Simon talking. Distract him.

  “I can’t tell you, bitch. Don’t you see?” he demanded forcefully, his breath hot against her neck. “But they know, Olivia. They know who you are. And they want their stuff. The proof.”

  “What are you talking about Simon? I don’t know anything about that.” She was so confused at what Simon was saying to her. He didn’t make any sense.

  “Don’t mock me, bitch!” Simon reached into his pocket, keeping Olivia pressed against the building with his body, and grabbed a knife, putting it up to her throat.

  She looked down when she felt the cold metal against her skin. Tears streamed down her face. “Simon, please. I think you’re mistaken. I don’t know what you’re talking about. I swear.”

  Simon thought about Olivia’s words. The people he worked for warned him that she may not remember, as it was so long ago. Then an idea came to him. It was a brilliant plan he was proud to have come up with, considering he was drunk. He knew it deviated from the plan he was told to adhere to, but he didn’t care.

  “Well, maybe one last fuck will help you remember. And for once it will be on my terms and not yours,” he growled.

  Olivia was confused and scared. “S-Simon. Please.” Tears started to flow more steadily from her eyes as he pushed Olivia’s skirt up. “Someone might see you,” she pled quietly, closing her eyes and hoping she would wake up and the entire evening turn out to be a bad dream.

  Simon grabbed onto her panties and ripped them painfully from her body. She screamed from the shock of it.

  “You know I like a screamer, but now’s not the time for that.” Simon pressed one hand over Olivia’s mouth, holding the knife against her throat with the other. Her entire body trembled under Simon’s weight.

  Her mind started to race as she assessed her situation. Simon had her pinned against the wall with his body. He easily outweighed her by a hundred pounds. But he was drunk. All she needed was a few seconds to get away from him and run. She couldn’t move her back or her arms, and her legs were useless. She opened her eyes, but all she could see was the brick of the wall he had her pressed against. Her heart raced, fearful of what Simon was about to do to her.