A Beautiful Mess

by T. K. Leigh

  “Come on, Love. Get that worried look off your face,” Alexander said, coming up behind Olivia as she put some of her toiletries in the bathroom. She looked up, gazing into his eyes through the mirror. He could see that her eyes were red and puffy. “Have you been crying?” He spun her around, making her face him.

  “No. Don’t be stupid,” she stated, wiping her eyes. “Just let me finish unpacking.” She tried to push Alexander out of the way. He stood in place, not letting Olivia pass, staring down at her for an explanation.

  “What if something happens to you, Alex?” she asked, her chin quivering. “That scares me to death. I’ve lost too many people I was close to. I finally let myself get close to someone again and now I’m frightened I’ll lose you, too.” She started sobbing again as Alexander pulled her into his chest. She struggled to suppress the urge to grab her bags and run as far away as possible. A voice in her head was telling her to push Alexander away. And she started to think that she needed to listen.

  “Hey. Hey. It’s okay. You have nothing to worry about with me. I’m not going anywhere. Someone will have to drive a stake through my heart to ever take me away from you. I mean that. I promise that I will always be here to look out for you.” He continued soothing her tears.

  Olivia took a few deep breaths and pulled away from Alexander’s chest, looking into his eyes. “I’m sorry. I don’t know why that set me off. I’m just overly emotional for some reason. I think nerves about this weekend are getting to me a little,” she lied, not wanting to admit to Alexander that she felt everything had started to spin out of control. She hated the feeling and could only think of one way to regain control. The only thing that had worked in the past. She wanted to run. But she kept hearing Kiera's words in her head telling her to take a risk for once. She wanted to, but at what cost?

  “That’s understandable, sweetheart.” He grabbed a tissue and wiped Olivia’s eyes. “Come. Let’s go to lunch and then do something fun. Are you ready?”

  “Yes.”

  Alexander took her hand in his and pulled her out of the master suite and off his yacht.

  ~~~~~~~~~~

  “I have to say, Miss Adler. I’m looking forward to christening my yacht with you this weekend,” Alexander said after the waiter dropped off a dozen oysters as they sat at an outdoor cafe right on the water.

  “You’ve never had sex on it?” Olivia glanced at him, wide-eyed.

  “No. I haven’t,” Alexander replied very matter-of-factly.

  “Hmm.”

  “What is it?”

  Olivia grabbed an oyster and slid it down her throat. “I don’t know. I just figured you would have taken some girl on it at some time and, well, rock the boat.”

  Alexander laughed. “Cute.” He exhaled loudly. “No, Olivia. Sadly, she is still a virgin ship.”

  “Well, let’s see what we can do about that.” She winked.

  Alexander felt his phone buzz again. He reached into his pocket and took it out. It was Martin. It was his fifth call within the hour. “I’m sorry, Love. I should take this.”

  “That’s okay. I understand.”

  “Thank you.” He pressed the answer button on his cell phone. “Yes, Martin. What is it?… What?!… When did this happen?… Okay… Yes… Handle it for the time being and we’ll discuss how to proceed…” Alexander hung up, fuming.

  “I won’t ask if everything is okay, because it does not appear that it is,” Olivia remarked, taking a drink from her wine glass.

  “Well, something has happened,” he replied, eyeing Olivia and taking a deep breath. “I don’t mean to frighten you, but the alarm on your system went off about an hour ago.”

  Olivia looked down at her watch. “It wouldn’t have been Kiera. She’s at work. She’s not supposed to feed… Oh my God! Is Nepenthe all right?” Olivia looked terrified.

  “Yes. He’s fine. A window triggered the alarm. Martin had another agent go over and check the house. They took Nepenthe to my place for the time being until we can sort everything out. I’ll let my pet sitter know to keep an eye on him, too.” He grabbed another oyster and tipped it back into his mouth.

  Olivia stared off into the distance, breathing deep, trying to resist the urge to leave the table and run. With every passing moment, things were spiraling downward.

  “Olivia, darling. Are you okay? Talk to me.”

  “What is going on?” she hissed. “I mean, really going on? I just feel like you’re keeping information from me. And I would really appreciate it if you were straightforward and honest with me. If you don’t think I’ve noticed your little protection details lately, you must think very little of my intelligence. I know you’ve been having one of your guys watching me whenever we’re not together. So why? What is it?”

  Alexander stared at her, contemplating what to tell her. “I’m just trying to keep you safe.”

  She glared at him. “If you really wanted to keep me safe, you would tell me what the fuck is going on.”

  Alexander exhaled loudly, throwing his napkin onto the table in front of him. “I know. I should have told you this earlier. And I wish I had, but I was hoping it was nothing.”

  Olivia’s heart began to race.

  “Remember that guy from the bar all those weeks ago?”

  She nodded.

  “Well, he’s the same person that bailed Simon out of jail and probably paid for his attorney as well. He’s using a fake name, but his real name is Mark Kiddish and he is a very bad, very powerful man. He is a professional “cleaner.” Do you know what that is?”

  Olivia shook her head as she took in everything Alexander told her.

  “A professional cleaner is someone who ties up loose ends, mainly for politicians and other high ranking government officials. Why he’s interested in you, I am not sure of, but he is not a good guy. So, yes. I am absolutely guilty of having some of my protection teams watching you. But I need to know you are safe, okay? This guy is a very real danger. I know no one has tried anything yet, but I don’t want to take any chances with you.” Alexander felt guilty for not telling her everything, but he just couldn’t. Not yet anyway.

  Olivia processed his words, trying to make sense of everything. Why would anyone want to harm her? She had money, yes, but that’s no reason for a professional “cleaner” to target her. “I appreciate that, Alex. I really do. But you should have told me. You can’t keep trying to protect me by withholding information from me. If you don’t tell me these things, how can I trust you? I need to be able to trust you. You’ve never given me a reason not to, but you can’t just make decisions based on what you think is best for me without asking.” She still couldn't shake the feeling that he wasn't telling her the whole story.

  “So you approve of the additional security?” Alexander looked at her, hopeful.

  She thought about that for a minute before sighing loudly. “If it makes you happy, yes. Fine.”

  Alexander swooped her hand from the table and held it to his lips. “That would make me extremely happy.” He placed a kiss on her hand as he stared at her. Olivia needed to do something to silence the voice in her head that was growing louder with each passing moment. She knew her time was running out.

  ~~~~~~~~~~

  “Donovan. It’s Cheryl. It worked. She is out of town this weekend with Burnham, but upon her return, I have been assigned to her security team.”

  “That’s wonderful news. But we need to continue to give Burnham a reason to think she needs that security, so don’t back off.”

  “I won’t.”

  “Now that we can get you close to her, I need you to start getting information from her. The old man hid her identity and faked her death. I need to tie up these loose ends. That box containing all those documents is still out there somewhere. We need to get our hands on it. You’ll need to help her try to remember where it is.”

  “And you’re certain she’ll know?”

  “I’d bet my life on it.”

  CHAPTER THIRTY<
br />
  MEMORIES

  THE sun filtered through the master suite, waking Olivia on Saturday morning. She rolled over and looked at Alexander as he slept, a peaceful look across his face. He didn’t wake up in the middle of the night screaming or crying like Olivia did. She wondered how much longer he would want to be woken up every night with her cries. The little voice in her head was back, telling her to run. She needed to quiet that voice. So she did the only thing she knew would dull the pain of her constant nightmares and silence the voice telling her to run before she had fallen too far. She swung a leg over Alexander, sitting on top of him, thinking she may already be in too deep.

  His eyes flung open. A look of surprise crept across his face, turning into a mischievous smile. “Mmmmm… This is a nice way to wake up,” he said sleepily. Olivia could feel his erection grow. She leaned down and planted kisses down his jaw as she ground against his hips. “Don’t start anything you have no intention of finishing, dear,” Alexander groaned.

  She looked at Alexander, his eyes hooded as he moved his hips beneath her, the voice in her head finally silent. “Oh, Mr. Burnham,” she batted her eyes. “I have every intention of finishing.” She lowered herself and pulled on his earlobe. “Again. And again. And again.”

  Alexander growled and flipped Olivia onto her back. She looked at him, a smile on her face. “I’ve been quite enjoying myself as we’ve christened your boat this weekend, Mr. Burnham.”

  “As have I, Miss Adler,” he replied, positioning himself between her legs. He leaned down, kissing her neck. “As have I,” he whispered as he slid into her. She gasped in surprise. “I’m glad to know I can still surprise you after all these weeks,” he grunted, filling her to the brim. Fire coursed through her body as he moved gently inside of her. His movements were slow and deliberate as he took his time, savoring every moment. Olivia didn’t want him gentle. She wanted him to be rough with her. The voice was back and became louder with each soft thrust.

  He gently nipped at her neck, tracing a line down her jaw and tugging at her earlobe. “You are one incredible woman,” Alexander said. “God, I love being inside of you, Olivia.” She ran her fingers up and down his back, her touch sending shivers through his body. “Just one touch and I’m ready to lose my mind, Love.”

  “Faster, Alex. Please,” she begged as she wrapped her legs around his waist, desperately bucking him with her hips.

  “No, Love. I want you to feel me. Do you feel this?” he asked as he continued his slow movements, the closeness almost unbearable.

  “Yes, Alexander. I feel it.” And she knew he wasn’t just talking about his erection inside her. He was talking about something else entirely.

  The voice grew louder.

  Alexander’s breathing became heavier as he picked up his pace, maintaining a quick but gentle rhythm. He leaned down and softly pulled on Olivia’s nipple with his mouth, sending her over the edge, her orgasm taking her by surprise. She moaned out Alexander’s name as she trembled around him. The feeling of Olivia pulsating around him in absolute ecstasy caught him off-guard and he soon found himself spiraling down from his own orgasm, collapsing on top of her. She held his head to her chest, stroking his hair and forehead beaded with sweat.

  “That was a fantastic way to wake up,” Alexander stated once his breathing slowed down.

  “I’m glad I could be of assistance,” Olivia smirked.

  “Come on, Love. Up and at ‘em,” Alexander said, pulling Olivia up with him and leading her into the shower. “Big day today. Let’s go get all your race stuff.” He turned on the water, testing the temperature.

  Olivia groaned, leaning against the bathroom wall. “Can’t I just spend one day in bed with you all day?” It's the only way I can try to dull this voice telling me to run, she wanted to say to him.

  “That sounds like heaven, dear, but it will have to wait. At least until next week sometime,” he replied, winking. “Here, Love.” He held out his hand and helped her step into the shower, the entire time, Olivia thinking she may not make it to next week.

  ~~~~~~~~~~

  “Nervous, Love?” Alexander asked as they left the race expo, Olivia clutching her race packet.

  “A little bit, I guess."

  “Come, let’s take a drive. It’s a beautiful day, and you still haven’t really done much exploring around this town.” He opened the door to his car for Olivia, helping her in.

  “Well, that’s because someone’s kidnapped me and used me as his sex-slave the past few days,” she giggled. “Kinky bastard.”

  Alexander laughed, turning the ignition on his convertible.

  “That I am.”

  A few moments passed as Alexander drove the streets of Newport heading to the other side of the town. “I like it when you take control in bed,” Olivia said out of nowhere, hoping he would take the hint and stop with the slow, emotional sex. She needed it rough. It was the only way.

  Alexander looked at her, wondering what had brought that up.

  “I used to never let anyone be like that toward me,” she continued. “I always needed to maintain total control in bed. That way it was easier to kick out whoever it was. I guess I always wanted to remain a cold-hearted, detached bitch. It’s less painful.”

  Alexander was floored by Olivia’s admission. He knew she had attachment issues, for obvious reasons. She had her family ripped from her when she was so young and had very few memories to fall back on.

  “That’s what I go to therapy for. You’ve been so good about not asking questions and I am thankful for that. I’ve been trying to get over my issues and my dreadfully overpriced therapist has been helping me get close to people again.”

  “I’m going to have to thank him or her, then,” Alexander replied, grabbing Olivia’s hand and kissing it. Several minutes passed as they drove around Newport in silence.

  “You’re my first boyfriend, you know. I would never date people before you.” She stared out the window as the landscape changed from small houses to larger estates, wishing that talking about things would silence the increasingly loud voice in her head.

  “Well, I’m glad you changed your outlook on the whole boyfriend thing,” Alexander remarked. “I’m glad you gave me the opportunity to get to know you.” He pulled the car into a parking lot. “We’re here.”

  “Where are we?”

  “Are you up for a little walk?” he asked, opening the door for her.

  “Of course. It’ll be a nice little warm up for tomorrow.”

  Alexander led her out of the parking lot and down a few blocks onto a rocky path. “This is the cliff walk. It follows the beach and all the old mansions are on it.”

  Olivia had never seen anything like it before. As they walked, the ocean rolled in far below them. High on the cliffs they were walking on, gorgeous, sprawling mansions sat overlooking the coast. Olivia relaxed as she basked in the warm sunshine and ocean breeze, inhaling the salty sea air.

  They walked for a while, Alexander pointing out the various estates. “This is the Breakers,” he said after a while. “Probably one of the most famous of the Newport Mansions.”

  Olivia looked at the enormous estate. “It looks so familiar.”

  Alexander’s heart stopped. He didn’t want her to remember. Why did he bring her there? Her mother was part of wealthy Newport society. “Well, probably because of how famous it is,” Alexander replied nervously.

  “Yeah, you’re probably right,” she responded, deep in thought. Everything seemed so familiar to her. As if she had been there before. It wasn’t just that mansion. It was all of it. The roads. The trees. The houses. The ocean. The cliffs. Everything. As they made their way down the walk, Olivia’s mind raced with various scenarios of how she could know that area of Newport so well when she never recalled ever visiting there. The voice was back and Olivia had a strange feeling that her entire world was about to come crumbling down on top of her.

  ~~~~~~~~~~

  “Hey, do me a favor. Take a
right up here. Onto Webster,” Olivia ordered as Alexander drove on Bellevue, heading back to the marina half an hour later.

  Alexander looked at her with a questioning look, his heart beginning to race. “Just humor me, please.”

  He hesitated before sighing loudly. “Your wish is my command, princess.”

  Olivia smiled weakly as Alexander put on his blinker and turned his car onto Webster.

  “Here. Slow down a little, please,” Olivia said, gazing out the car at the large estates on her right. “Okay, stop. Pull over,” she ordered.

  He obeyed, albeit reluctantly, and pulled the car to the side of the road before putting it in park. Olivia got out of the car and started walking up the street. “Where are you going, Olivia?” Alexander asked as he jumped out of the car, following her on foot. He cringed when he realized where they were.

  “Alex. I know this house,” she replied quietly, looking at a large home behind a wrought iron fence. “Why do I know this house?”

  Alexander stopped and stared at the large estate. The massive brick pillars held a nameplate. “Harrison House.” He knew the house well. Olivia had spent a great deal of time there her first few years of life. Her grandparents’ home.

  “I don’t know, Love,” he lied. “Please, get back in the car before someone hits you.”

  She continued to stare, pressing her hand against the brick of the pillars holding the entry gate and running her fingers against the nameplate bearing the name “Harrison House.” She stood there for several long minutes, trying to remember why she knew that house. Finally, she shook her head and turned to get back in the car.

  The voice grew louder.

  The car was eerily quiet on the way back to the marina, neither person wanting to initiate conversation. Alexander knew his time was running out. Olivia had started to remember certain things. It would probably only be a matter of time until she put two and two together and realized who he was. She had already had a dream where the younger Alexander morphed into the older one. He needed to read that letter, if he could only build up enough nerve to do so.