An Earl For Hire

by Bethany M. Sefchick

  While most of the rooftops of London were bare, this roof was filled with all manner of bric-a-brac. To his left, there was a small shed of some sort, just barely large enough for a child. He had no idea what might be in there, but given the size, likely something only of interest to Miri. To his right was a small area with another roof over it. Beneath that sat an array of telescopes, five in all, each of varying sizes. Directly in front of him was a makeshift tent that housed an overstuffed chair and yet another, much larger telescope. Tables of various sizes and shapes were scattered about, each holding more lanterns and other assorted objects he could not even begin to guess at.

  This was clearly the domain of a scientist and not someone who merely dabbled in astronomy. Every object seemed to have its proper place and Miri seemed to be able to sense if anything was amiss. As Will watched her move easily through the maze of furniture, Miri's fingertips grazed lovingly over each item that she passed. He might not know the purpose of these objects or feel at home here, but she clearly did.

  "Miri." Words could not capture how amazed he truly was by all of this. By her world. "This is..."

  "Silly, is it not?" she finished for him as she turned, her pale pink, crystal-encrusted evening gown incredibly out of place among the gleaming wood and brass that dominated the area. "You must think me the oddest of peagooses ever. I would not blame you in the least if you did. I know that I am different."

  Picking his way carefully around the tables, Will was finally able to get close enough to her to take her hands in his. "I was going to say that this was amazing. This is not some game you play. This is your passion."

  Still holding his hands, Miri shrugged though it was evident a part of her was pleased with his compliments. "As I said before, the stars are always in order. Though they move through the night sky, they do so with precision. There are those men, far more learned than I, who hypothesize that the stars drift over time and I suppose it is true that they might. That is outside of my realm of knowledge. Still, they seem in order to me."

  "And still you study them," Will replied, still attempting to take in all of the fine details that surrounded him. "For your own pleasure. They are your passion."

  "I do." She nodded, his last comment seemingly escaping her notice. "When little else in my life made sense, the stars always did." Their hands still clasped, she gestured to the row of telescopes beneath the small roof. "My family did not understand my desire for order and to avoid Society. I fear they still don't. However, they do indulge me."

  Miri tugged on his hand and Will allowed her to lead him to the row of telescopes. "They make certain my equipment is set up for my use on clement nights and removed before dawn so that no harm comes to these things that mean so much to me. My brother had the floor below us reinforced with metal rods so that I might work up here without fear of falling. He added the wrought iron railing for the same reason."

  "It is magnificent." This place truly was and Will could easily see its appeal, especially to a woman like Miri - one who never quite fit in with the more practical world far below them.

  Miri glanced away shyly. "I do not bring people here often." Kneeling down, she picked up a broken bit of something. Upon closer inspection, he could see that it was a piece of glass. "This is my haven and I do not like it...disrupted."

  "Does your family come here? Your friends?" Will dared not ask about another man coming up here, for he found that he really did not wish to think of Miri here with another man. This was too private, too personal.

  "My brother used to come up here from time to time. The last time, he brought Sarah and that did not go well." She fingered the broken shard of glass, rubbing it thoughtfully between her fingers. "When I work here, I usually wear breeches instead of my skirts. The telescopes are delicate. Fragile." She fingered the glass again, stroking it almost lovingly.

  Will could easily fill in the rest. "And Sarah, being a proper lady, came up here in voluminous skirts."

  "It was not her fault," Miri was quick to point out. "But she turned too quickly and her gown caught the edge of my newest telescope. Rayne replaced it immediately of course, but..." She bit her lip as she trailed off.

  "But you still felt as if you had been violated in some way," Will supplied. He understood what it was like to see your possessions stripped away from you. In his case, it had been to pay creditors. In Miri's case, it was a family accident. However, the feeling was the same.

  Nodding, Miri placed the glass shard on the table. "After that? I could not bring myself to allow my family to set foot here again, no matter how much they begged. I know Sarah did not mean to do such a thing, but what if she had damaged the one crafted by Euler or the Dolland I only recently procured? Those could not be replaced and it would break my heart to see them damaged, even though they are only mere objects. They are not people. Which is largely my problem. I try to differentiate between the two, but when I care deeply about something, alive or not? I will not lie. It is difficult." She made a sweeping gesture with her hands. "Everything you see here is because my family indulges me. I know that and yet, I still cannot do as they ask and allow them back into this world. I can't be the woman they want me to be. I have tried. And I have failed. Spectacularly."

  "And they don't understand why not, do they?" Will asked quietly, moving just a little closer to her, the need to be near her almost unbearable. "I confess that I do not understand the science behind what you do, love. It is beyond my grasp. Though I do understand the why of it. Why you wish to keep this part of yourself safe and protected from that which would harm you. Even family." He squeezed her hand and felt something soft and tender bubble up inside of him. He pushed the sentiment back down quickly. "Sometimes it is all a bit overwhelming, isn't it? Especially when those closest to you do not understand your actions and often times fault you for them."

  A look of relief washed over Miri's face and he was afraid that she might swoon again. "That is it precisely. I am not like other young women. I never have been. Nor can I change what I am. I would not wish to, either. My family does the best they can, but they still push for me to be what Society dictates that I should be."

  "A prim and proper lady who always follows the rules and desires a house, a husband and a family of her own?" Will guessed. It did not take wild leaps of logic to come to that conclusion.

  "Precisely." She reached out to run her hand over one of her beloved telescopes. "And it is not that I don't want those things. I do, at least in some fashion."

  Will pulled her closer, so close that she was now almost pressed against him. He was overjoyed when she did not object or pull away. "However you desire those things on your terms and not Society's." When he wrapped her in his embrace, he was gratified that she did not pull back or slap him for the liberties he was taking. "I understand, Miri. More than you know."

  She said nothing for a long moment, instead burrowing closer until he could feel the soft press of her breasts against his chest, even through the fabric of their clothes. Finally, she pulled back. "I lied before when I said that I do not feel."

  "I know." Miri was clearly surprised to see a smile and not a frown of anger on his face. "You feel something, love. And it is more than just care and concern for your telescopes. If you truly felt nothing at all, you would not have taken over The Letter from your Aunt Beanie. Nor would you care what your family thinks of your behavior. You also would not care about the gossip rags. But you do all of that and more. My guess? You are simply afraid to allow yourself to feel too deeply."

  "You can't know that," Miri protested.

  "I can." Will pulled her closer until he could feel her heart begin to beat in time with his. "As I said before, you and I are not all that different, Miri. For I do not allow myself to feel anything too deeply either. It is a product of growing up an impoverished lord, of seeing what you desire so very badly and never being able to reach out and take it. For growing up with a father who loved me deeply but loved the thrill of the risky gamble
even more. From the time I was a child, there were things I desired but could never have because my father continually threw good money after bad on his risky ventures. Therefore, I made myself not want those things I coveted so badly. Or I pretended that I did. But deep down? I still wanted and I still felt. I simply had to convince myself that I did not want or feel. It made life so much easier."

  He was silent for a long moment, savoring the feel of the woman in his arms. This was right and good and he did not feel dirty or used when he was with her. He felt human, as if he had worth and value. He felt as if he mattered to someone, even if that was simply an illusion. Therefore, it did not take long for him to speak again.

  "I was seven," he whispered softly into her hair, "when the little toy shop in the village near my family's country seat of Hunter's Glen placed a set of tin soldiers in the window. I'm not even certain now how many soldiers the box contained. I only knew that to me, it seemed like a veritable army. Perhaps it was."

  "Will, you don't have to..." Miri began but he silenced her with a quick kiss.

  He nestled her closer against him. "I asked for that set of soldiers as a Christmastide gift. Mind you, I had never in my young life asked my parents for anything, for I was always taught that what we could afford would be given. There was to be no asking."

  "But you asked for the soldiers." Hers was not a question.

  "I did, and I was immediately made for feel guilty for even asking. Yet each time we ventured into the village, I was drawn to that shop window. Then, one day, the soldiers were gone and a part of me knew that they were forever beyond my reach. Another part of me still hoped, I suppose, but when Christmas came and went and with it, no box of soldiers, I knew some other lucky boy had received them. As it turned out, the miller had an extremely good year and bought them for his son as an extravagant Christmastide gift. I was...disappointed, to say the least. As the son of an earl, we should have been able to afford them. But we could not. After that?" He could barely hear his own words. "I taught myself not to want or desire anything for myself. That way, I would never again be disappointed."

  Will felt Miri relax into him and a part of him felt as if she was taking his pain and making it her own. An absurd notion really and one likely borne from the lateness of the hour. Still, he basked in the feeling she was creating within him, wherever it came from. "Oh, Will. I'm sorry," she whispered, her voice muffled by his chest. "I had no idea."

  Wrapping his arms tighter around her, Will did his best to try not to picture the woman in his arms naked, even though the press of her breasts into his chest was beginning to drive him mad. When all else was stripped away, he was still a man and she was still a woman paying to be seduced.

  "No one did. Until you." His voice sounded thick to his own ears.

  She shifted in his embrace and looked up at him, though he prayed that she could not feel the hard evidence of his desire. Or if she did, she would not know what that was. Then again, she was intelligent and no one's fool. She likely did know, though she did not seem to care. In fact, it was as if at this moment, all she could see was him. In the moonlight, her eyes were luminous and he decided that if he lived for all of eternity, he would never see a more beautiful woman than Miri Bexley.

  "Will." That single word hung between them and he did not know how to respond. So he did the only thing he knew how to do.

  "Miri," he whispered as he lowered his lips to hers, "I want you. I have taught myself not to want or desire, for I know better. And yet, I still want you. Even though I know you, like those soldiers, are well beyond my grasp. I should not want you. You are not for me to desire. And yet, I do. God forgive me, but I do."

  She let out a small gasp of shock at his words and he used that moment to his advantage, pressing his lips to hers and then delving deep with his tongue. The kiss was both hot and sweet at the same time, full of passion and something deeper that he could and would not name. Will would have been satisfied with that much from her. Until Miri, as she always did, took matters into her own hands and kissed him back, grasping his head in her hands and pulling him down closer to her.

  At that moment, once more, Will questioned the wisdom in choosing the devil he thought he knew. Perhaps he did not know this particular devil very well at all. And that was a rather disquieting thought indeed.

  Then the woman in question threaded her fingers through his hair and whispered his name as if it was a prayer and she a dying woman. Then he ceased to think at all. There was only Miri, the moonlight, and this kiss. In this moment, there was nothing more that he needed.

  Chapter Eight

  Town Tattler

  It has been two days since our American Marquess, Lord Daniel Weston, hosted his first London ball and the tongues still wag about the event. I am certain that other faithful reporters have conveyed the details of what lady was clad in scandalous scarlet and what gentleman was caught with his trousers down in the silver closet far better than I ever could. Truth be told, dear readers, I don't read the words written by my fellow gossipers. Shocking, I know, but I prefer to forge my own path.

  In any case, I can say that Lord Blackthorne has a bigger problem on his hands than some passing flirtation with Lady Miri Bexley, even if I still maintain that they would not suit. No, there is a rumor swirling about that he - or rather a certain part of his body - is for hire. For the right price, of course. I, for one, find this both shocking and absurd. There is no possible way a fine gentleman like Lord Blackthorne would whore himself out to the highest bidder like some common prostitute in the worst sort of house Covent Garden has to offer. It is simply not done, no matter how poor one is! For further proof, his odd but seemingly genuine flirtation with Lady Miri should suffice. After all, in order to save his earldom, he would require far more coin than the chit possesses with her modest dowry, proof enough that whatever madness overcame him at Lord Weston's it was of the genuine variety and not out of greed or the desire to seduce an innocent out her funds. More than that, dallying with an innocent with such a bloody thirsty brother as the former "Earl of Heartbreak," would not help Lord Blackthorne's cause to, er, sell himself if that was indeed his goal.

  So I highly doubt and in fact, can say I completely disregard the rumors floating about regarding the good earl. He is not for hire. No matter what Lady Frostburn or Lady Colchester whisper behind closed door. Everyone knows that both of those women do not take rejection well and I find it far more likely that they both propositioned Lord Blackthorne and, being the gentleman that he is, he turned them down. This is merely some game they play in order to exact revenge because they were denied. And the very idea that Miri Bexley is paying the Earl of Blackthorne to both court and seduce her! Even more absurd! If the accusations are true, then once more, I shall eat my favorite hat. Thus far, that feathered creation is safe and, I can assert with confidence, always will be.

  -Lady A

  "Miri, are you even listening to me?"

  "I'm sorry. What did you ask me?" Miri had no idea how long she had been staring into her cup of tea or how long Pearl had been speaking either, but she had the impression that her mind had been drifting for some time. Looking around, the shadows on the cream-colored drawing room walls had changed as well, indicating that she might have been lost in her thoughts for at least a quarter hour or more. What time was it anyway? She honestly had no idea.

  Pearl sat back with a satisfied look on her face. "I asked whether or not you were going to see Lord Blackthorne tonight, but I believe I already have my answer."

  "He will be at Lady Morgan's musicale this evening and Lady Weatherby's garden party tomorrow afternoon. So yes, I suppose I will see him at one of those events." Actually, Miri had done nothing other than think about when she might see Will next as of late.

  After their heated kisses on the roof of Raynecourt House, he had called upon her the following day to go driving in the park. The trip had been cut short by a sudden spring thunderstorm that had blown up out of nowhere and left the
m both soaked to the bone. Will had hinted that he might pay a visit during regular calling hours yesterday, but he had not. Instead, he had sent a box of fine chocolates and a card with his regrets. Miri had been disappointed of course, though she did her best not to appear overly so to her mother and Sarah. If she appeared too eager to see Will, Ophelia would have the church booked immediately and Sarah would have the wedding breakfast completely planned not long after that.

  In fact, her mother had been hinting at just such plans ever since that fateful night when Will had swept Miri into his embrace and carried her out of Lord Weston's townhome in what had looked like a full swoon. In her mother's eyes, Will was a hero and a proper gentleman of the highest order. More than that, he seemed to "tolerate" - her mother's word and not Miri's - her youngest daughter's sometimes odd and peculiar behavior, and that was something no man before him had ever done. Therefore, as far as Ophelia was concerned, her daughter had met her perfect match and ought to marry him straight away before he changed his mind or discovered some "peculiarity" about Miri that left him cold.

  If only her mother knew just how much Will had learned recently about Miri and her peculiarities...

  As for Sarah, well, she simply stood around with a very self-satisfied smile on her face. Though there was something unsettling lurking in her eyes a well. As if she was pleased that Miri had a beau, and yet not at the same time.

  "You like him. The earl, I mean. I can tell." Pearl smirked from her position on the settee. "In fact, I would go so far as to say that you are enamored of him. I never thought I would see the day."

  "You sound like my mother," Miri grumbled. "Or Sarah. All they can see at present is a large church wedding complete with massive flower bouquets and a splendid wedding breakfast."

  Pearl looked at her friend thoughtfully, the idea seeming to take root in her mind as well, drat it all. "Would that really be such a terrible thing?"