Saved: a dark romance

by DD Prince

  Word was traveling about my marriage, too, evidently.

  I texted her.

  Me: “got your msg, Mena. thx. you tell him anything?”

  Mena: “Who?”

  Me: “You know who. Did you tell him anything about my wife?”

  Mena: “Honest to God, no. And I haven’t talked to him. Pray I don’t have to. I called the house because I got a text from him and it freaked me out.”

  Me: “What did he want?”

  Mena: “He asked me to come have a look at Allegra. She’s not feeling well. She’s got some scary symptoms. I told him I’m in Paris but I’ll hurry back. Sorry about your mama. I want to help her but do you think he’ll make me stay?”

  Me: “I’m workin’ on that. If I have my way, he won’t give anyone any orders again. I won’t make you stay. It’s all but over, Mena. Between us.”

  Mena: “You need any help with that, lmk.”

  Me: “Yeah?”

  Mena: “There’s meds in the house. Lock box under the laundry machines with stuff that’ll either put someone out for two hours or will put him out permanently. Blue-2 hours. Orange – dead. Combination: 77803. I told Allegra about it, too. Hopefully she decides to prick that prick. lol”

  I was thrown. A joke from her?

  Me: “Thanks Mena. I’ll get a doc for my mother. He say what was wrong with her?”

  Mena: “I should call to fill you in. Or come. Want me to come?”

  Me: “Stay where you are. Not safe to come here now.”

  Good to know she had the means to catch any of us by surprise to take us out with lethal injections. I’d been a real prick to her on more than one occasion and yet she hadn’t used those meds on me.

  Mena: “You need anything, lmk. I can fly there to help.”

  Me: “Thanks. I’ll be in touch if needed. Don’t come right now though. It’s all about to go down.”

  Mena: “OK”

  I was a bit surprised at that. But not really. If I hated him, any woman in my family would feel the same. Jimena was his niece, daughter to his eldest sister who was a widow thanks to my father. My aunt lived at my father’s house and helped to run the main house, but she was a shell of a woman.

  I didn’t know if he’d ever touched her or Mena. I never asked. He sent Jimena to medical school but told her she’d come back and use that training to take care of her family. She did it and she stayed until just before I sent Holly away. She deserved her freedom after all she’d had to endure in her life so far.

  I pondered things a minute and then I sent a text to Zack.

  “El Diablo’s at the compound. Showdown time. Can you meet me in Mexico City tomorrow? Bring Holly to me?”

  It took all of two minutes for him to answer.

  “Gotcha. Be there tomorrow. I’ll text when we land.”

  A slick oily sick feeling bubbled up in my throat at the idea of my father’s filthy eyes on her.

  Holly

  Me and Tia and Angel decide we’ll be spending the afternoon trying to improve our Texas Hold ‘Em game for tonight’s rematch. We’d played the night before and Dare had handed us our behinds so we decided to play until we got better.

  He’s got a pretty darn good poker face but I like to think I’m good at reading people so tonight, I’m determined to win.

  Carina’s asleep in a motorized baby swing under a beach umbrella and we’re at the patio table. Tommy, Dare, and Zack are inside, in a pow wow of some sort. Zack had called them in and it’d been a long while since then.

  I was in a funk, for sure. I didn’t know where Alessandro had gone. I was told by Dare that if he didn’t get back in time, I’d go home with them. My room was still my room at their house.

  I was blue, too, because I was a fifth wheel. I’d been watching Tommy and Tia together and I was jealous. So frigging jealous. They had this love that was so vivid. He was so protective and possessive, and you could see he was on top of the world having his little family.

  Dare and my sister were always making out and he didn’t pass by without them touching in some way. Whenever they were close he had his hand on her belly and he called her “My Baby” and “Angelbaby” and he was so doting. So doting and sweet. I heard him in the kitchen the night before, whispering “My baby is having my baby,” and I almost cried at the joy on her face.

  The night before, despite the big house, I’m pretty sure I heard one or maybe even both couples doing the nasty.

  But God, Tommy is so bloody hot with that little baby in his arms. Anne Geddes and Michael Stokes should get together and do a photo shoot with those two. Cutest baby ever with one the second hottest guy ever.

  I can’t imagine Alessandro holding a baby in his strong arms. But I want to. I really really want to. Hottest guy ever becomes hot Dad and doting husband… movie at eleven. I wish.

  We play cards until late and then I go to bed and have terrible dreams about the monster from my graphic novel killing Alessandro and chasing me.

  ***.

  I wake at the crack of dawn, unable to get to sleep after that nightmare, so I head downstairs to get the coffee on and see Tommy’s asleep on the couch in the family room, Carina asleep on his bare chest, an empty baby bottle in the crook of his arm. A fluffy pink blanket over her legs, her sleeping up on her knees, her rump up in the air. After I’d heard all the ‘business’ going on, I’d heard her fussing throughout my mostly sleepless night and my guess was that he brought her downstairs so Tia could get some sleep. She’s been very drooly and Tia thinks she’s getting ready to cut a tooth.

  I sneak by them to go to the kitchen to put the coffee on as quietly as possible and then get my cup and go outside as quietly as I can.

  It’s barely sunrise and Zack is already outside when I get out there. He’s butting out a cigarette in an ashtray.

  “Hi,” I greet. I don’t know him real well. In my few months staying with Ang and Dare, he’d been over a few times and we’d had a couple small-talk conversations but nothing too heavy. I knew from Ang and Tia the day before that he and Tessa were now an item.

  I liked that for her and I liked it for her boys. Zack is tall and muscled with full sleeves of tattoos and he’s handsome with kind of a hot dad vibe, in my opinion. And he seems protective, too. Ang and Tia told me a bit about what’d been a secret Tessa and Zack romance that had come to light and it made me jealous, too.

  She’d gotten herself into a pretty bad bind out of trying to deal with the pain she was in over losing her husband and over what’d happened to her that brought her to the auction block in Mexico.

  He’d rescued her from her foray with some dangerous people in a less than above-board sex club. And then it sounded like he’d helped put the broken pieces of her heart back together.

  All these people around me had found love with someone who reciprocated. Or, who at least showed that they reciprocated.

  I wanted it, too. And I was told I’d never have it. And I couldn’t share that with anyone. I couldn’t talk about us.

  Ang had tried to pry. So did Tia in a gentler way. But, I told them I didn’t wanna talk about it. Truthfully, it wasn’t theirs to have. I was so protective of what me and Alessandro had that I couldn’t share it. I knew they wouldn’t understand it. I had trouble making sense of it myself.

  How do you explain that you love someone who has been trying to push you away while holding onto you at the same time? How do you explain that you’re married to someone who swears they’ll never give you happiness, and not only that, but also that they’ll destroy you --- without the people you explain it to telling you that you need to GTFO of that situation pronto?

  How do you articulate that you know in the depths of your soul that despite the fact that your relationship has been filled with pain, with heartache, that you shouldn’t and will not give up? I’m too stubborn to give up.

  They’d think I was crazy. They’d go away and talk about it and then come back and try to do an intervention. Or worse, they’d t
ell their husbands and those guys would turn on my guy and try to shield me from more hurt. Which could get everyone hurt.

  I couldn’t share, too, because it wasn’t anyone’s but ours. And I wasn’t throwing in the towel. I was braced for whatever would come next.

  Despite that, I couldn’t help but watch them with envy, wanting what all of them had.

  They were building families. And they had bonds with one another. The Ferrano men were demonstrative, protective, and engaged with their wives. Those girls knew what they had.

  Me? I was here, not knowing where my husband was. I’ve spent very little time since married actually with him. And the time we spent before that? It was all me trying to convince him I love him and him hurting me to push me away while simultaneously trying to control my environment to keep me safe.

  Am I crazy? Should I give up?

  “Want some coffee?” I ask Zack. “Just brewed a pot.”

  “Yes, please. Then we have to hit the road, you and me,” Zack informs me.

  “Hm?” I sip my coffee.

  “I heard from Lex. He needs us in Mexico. Can you get me that coffee while I book our flight? He told me you know where your passport is? Three creams, four sugars. Don’t tell Sarah.” He had his cell phone and was dialing. He flashed me a very nice smile.

  Sarah was affectionately known as the Sugar Nazi.

  “Uh. Ok.”

  I hurry back in, get Zack’s coffee and drop it off while he’s on the phone. He mouths “Go pack” to me and I nod and go back inside, tiptoeing by the sleeping but stirring Carina and the still sleeping Tommy.

  Tommy’s eyes open. I keep tiptoeing and put my index finger to my lips in a “Shh” motion. He glances down at the sleeping baby on his chest. She’s rolled to her back. She’s wearing a onesie with an ice cream cone on it. He shifts like he’s stiff. She nuzzles in and puts her thumb in her mouth. I watch him freeze, looking down at her. I’m melting more than a little bit because he was obviously uncomfortable but doesn’t want to disturb her so he’s foregoing his own comfort for his daughter’s sleep. So adorable.

  I pass him a toss pillow from the nearby chair and he carefully puts it under his head and gives me a thumbs up.

  I head upstairs and shower then pack up the big hockey bag that had been left for me when Alessandro brought me here and parceled out our things and left with his stuff in a rucksack that had been in the hockey bag. I reach under the mattress and into the pocket under the mattress label, finding my passport and the credit card he’d given me.

  I hear others up and moving around by the time I bring my bag down.

  Zack is in a huddle with my sister, Dare, and Tommy in the kitchen. Both Ferrano men are shirtless, in vacation mode. Sarah’s making waffles. Tia is already showered and dressed in a sundress but her hair is up in a towel turban and she is changing the baby and making faces and blowing raspberries on Carina’s belly, making her make the cutest little baby giggles I’ve ever heard.

  I plop the hockey bag on the floor and approach the group.

  Ang throws her arms around me, teary-eyed, “Call me as soon as you can. We can’t go another ten months, okay?”

  I nod, feeling my chin tremble, “I will. As soon as possible.” As soon as he lets me would be a more accurate promise.

  “Grow me a healthy baby niece or nephew.” I rub her belly.

  She smiles at me.

  Sarah passes me an insulated reusable grocery bag with some bottles of water and food in it for the ride to the airport. And off we go.

  ***

  “Do I get to know what’s happening?” I ask Zack, in the passenger seat of his rental car.

  “Sandro surfaced at the compound.”

  I stare blankly, wondering what that will mean.

  He glances at me and then back at the road.

  “Alessandro hasn’t told me a thing, Zack. I know little to nothing. It’s up to you what you wanna share with me but he doesn’t seem to want me to know anything so if you tell me stuff, you might have to answer to him.” I roll my window down and add, “But Ang has told me a little bit. Whatever she knows, anyway.”

  He taps his fingers thoughtfully on the steering wheel for a minute and then starts talking.

  And when he stops, he’s filled me in on some facts that tell me how truly horrible my father-in-law is.

  He ran a large criminal empire of guns and women. His relatives ran drugs and had ties to child pornography. He’d been on the Most Wanted list for sex trafficking and gun running and wasn’t being actively sought out because he’d made Alessandro fake his death.

  He was suspected of murder at least thirty times over, likely more, not counting however many sex slaves had been killed. Zack said there was reportedly a graveyard on the property that the authorities really wanted to check out.

  “Graveyard? They’ve also got a crematorium. I don’t think it’ll be possible to know how many people died in that place,” I shared.

  Zack said that despite that there wasn’t an active investigation due to Sandro’s disappearance and evidence that pointed to dying in a freak accident on an ocean fishing trip.

  Zack had personal reasons for wanting Sandro Romero taken down and he had been working with Alessandro for nearly four years to try to bring his father down. At his own expense, something that would be recouped if he ever brought Sandro Romero in.

  He also told me he’d lost a girl he’d been dating, how Alessandro’s father was responsible. He then went on to tell me some of what he knew of Alessandro’s upbringing.

  “Lex had to live in that place with a lunatic as the king. And Sandro was the king in a way he ensured people treated him as such. Lex’s mom took him and they got away a couple days after his sixth birthday but he was back there at fifteen years old, after living looking over their shoulders, praying that he’d never find them. He found them. And your husband blames himself. It had to be crazy. He had to try to keep his head while appeasing the lunatic otherwise risk his mother facing punishment. Whenever Lex displeased his father after they were brought back from the states, his mother was punished. Whenever he screwed up, his mother was punished. Your man holds a lot of pain bottled up. It can’t have not affected him. We don’t even know what he’s set eyes on in his lifetime so far. I’ve met some fucked up men as a result of their circumstances, but he’s cool as a cucumber. Yet, from a very tender age, he had a front row seat to the results of that lunatic’s shit. The way Lex holds it together? He’s either the most well-adjusted guy ever or he’s hangin’ on by a thread. My guess? The latter.”

  “I’d bet money you’d guess right,” I informed, cracking open my water bottle and passing him one.

  “Bagel?” I ask.

  He looks at me for a beat, “Yeah. Please.”

  I pass him one from the bag and as he unwraps it, he says, “So, how about you? Where’s your head? You’re married to the guy. You’ve been through a lot in your young life so far. How’s that all going?”

  “I’m probably hanging on by a half a thread,” I admit.

  He puts his bagel on his thigh, reaches over and gives my shoulder a squeeze and then grabs his bagel after turning a corner.

  “What are we doing, then?” I ask.

  He regards me thoughtfully for a second and then says, “Don’t know till we get to Mexico City. He’s waiting for us in a hotel there. He’ll brief me then. We’ll figure out a plan. He’s already working on it.”

  I can tell he’s a bit perplexed by me, by my situation.

  “All I know is what you’ve told me, really. He tells me nothing.”

  “Will you tell me about your relationship with him? Whatever you feel comfortable telling me?” he encourages.

  I take a breath. “He tries to push me away while holding onto me at the same time. Our relationship wouldn’t make sense to anyone.”

  “Do you want out?” he asks.

  I give a firm shake of my head, “Strangely, no. I see something in him. I see something
I don’t think he sees. He protected me. He kept me sheltered from whatever horrors happened in that compound. I mean, I saw some terrible stuff my first twenty-four hours but after that, I was kept safe, apart. I hardly even saw him until a few months before my eighteenth birthday. Someone tried to burn the building I was in to the ground and that’s when things changed. He got more protective, he wanted me closer I guess, so he put me in the house and I saw him more often. It’s like he’s been my guardian angel but yet he won’t admit to being anything but a devil. He wants me to hate him. But, I don’t. Despite some of the things I’ve seen him do and despite some of the things he’s done to me.”

  “Like?”

  I shake my head and sip my water.

  He gives me a minute and then probably because it’s obvious I am not about to share, he continues,

  “You might not ever have a normal relationship with him, Holly. Even after all this is over? Lotta people live and function despite bad starts in life or despite having to do bad things to get by. But you gotta be prepared; he might be too damaged to give you much more than what you’re getting.”

  “That’s okay,” I say, “It might not make sense but it’s okay. I’ll take him however I can have him.”

  “You’re one of a kind, then. Most girls would run a mile, so they could find something normal.”

  “I’ve had an unusual life. I’m not looking for normal. I don’t know what that even is.”

  “Promise me something,” he requests.

  I wait patiently while he looks like he’s measuring his words.

  “If you come to a point where you decide that you’ve been wrong and that you really do need help getting away from him, you’ll come to me. I’ll help you. That way you don’t have to put your family, Angel, Dario, in danger. Don’t think it hasn’t crossed my mind, and Dario’s, that you wouldn’t go to them for help thinkin’ Lex would hurt them for trying to help you. We’ve discussed it. I can help you in a way where no one gets hurt but the person who deserves it.”