Swamp Sniper

by Jana DeLeon

  My friend Ally waved her order pad at me and pointed to an empty table in the corner. The café was usually busy this time of the morning, and today was no exception. That two-seater in the back was the only opening at the moment, but that was perfect for me.

  I noticed an uncomfortable lull in conversation as I walked through the café, and forced myself not to sigh. I slid into the chair, my back against the wall so that I could see all entry points into the building. It was a habit I hadn’t been able to break, even though I was technically a civilian in Sinful. So far, I’d managed to restrain myself from rearranging the living room furniture at my house, but every time I sat in that recliner with my laptop, that window behind me felt like a semiautomatic weapon aimed directly at my back.

  Ally slid a cup of coffee in front of me. “Did you hear about the break-in at the church last night?”

  “Yeah. Carter showed up at Ida Belle’s to see if we did it.”

  Ally’s eyes widened. “What is wrong with him? Ida Belle and Gertie have done some strange things in the past, I’ll give him that, but this is just too weird.”

  “Hmmm,” I said and directed my attention to the coffee. I hated lying to Ally, but it was far easier on her if she was left out of the loop, especially as she didn’t know my real identity. I’d gotten comfortable around her so quickly that I sometimes caught myself about to slip into conversation about the real me.

  “I can’t talk now,” she said, “and I’ve got the funeral after work, but I’ll try to come over this evening and we can exchange gossip. Do you want breakfast?”

  “Absolutely. I’ll have the special, eggs over easy.”

  She made a note on her pad and gave me a smile. “Got it.”

  As she walked to the kitchen to put the order in, I sipped my coffee and pretended to gaze out the plate-glass windows of the café. What I was really doing was watching the other patrons. It was a difficult skill to learn, but one that was infinitely handy. Most everyone had gone back to their conversations, but it was easy to tell which of the customers had turned their talk toward me. They cast furtive glances in my direction, then immediately jerked their heads around when I locked my eyes on theirs.

  Amateurs.

  My senses were so well developed that on a mission, I could lock in on a bird staring at me from outside a window. Civilians sneaking glances in an open room were child’s play. I recognized some of them from my visits to the café and the General Store, but didn’t know any of them by name. None of them looked like members of the mob who had incited the riot in front of the sheriff’s department.

  It only took a couple of minutes for Ally to return with my plate of eggs, bacon, and biscuits and I dug in. I couldn’t recall the last time I’d sat down to a meal of real food, but I was fairly sure I’d consumed my weight in desserts and coffee the day before. It was no wonder I was craving protein and exercise. My body probably thought I’d abandoned it.

  “I like a woman with an appetite.”

  The voice sounded above me and I barely kept myself from jumping as I looked up at the man I’d met at the rally…Bobby, I think he’d said. I’d been concentrating so hard on Ida Belle’s current dilemma and focusing on my breakfast that I hadn’t even seen him approach.

  “You think most women don’t eat?” I asked, then popped the last bite of biscuit in my mouth.

  He laughed. “Not in front of men.”

  I swallowed and took a sip of coffee. “Then they’re stupid.”

  I knew this was his attempt at flirting with me, and he wasn’t a bad-looking guy, but something about his cocky stance grated on me. I knew this guy. I worked with a bunch of this guy, which is exactly why I didn’t date other agents.

  “Sandy-Sue, right?”

  I blanched a bit at the real name of the woman I was pretending to be. “Everyone calls me Fortune.”

  “Why is that?”

  “Because Sandy-Sue sucks?”

  He grinned down at me. “You are a real piece of work, aren’t you? I can see why ole Carter is having a hard time keeping you under wraps. You got a problem with authority?”

  His question hit a little too close to the mark for my taste, and if my boss, Morrow, was there, he’d have yelled “yes” so loud it would have burst people’s eardrums.

  “Only when they’re wrong,” I finally replied. It was as close to honest as I was going to get.

  “No wonder Carter thinks you’re trouble. According to the local buzz, he’s setting a record lately for pissing people off.”

  I bristled at his insinuation. Carter wasn’t the strictest law enforcement officer I’d ever come across—thank God, or I’d have been sitting in a jail cell practically since the day I arrived in town—but he wasn’t deliberately antagonistic. Sometimes, it might feel like he was giving me grief, but the reality was, I’d always been the one crossing the line.

  “I think it’s called ‘doing his job,’” I said.

  “Yeah, well,” Bobby shuffled a bit, apparently catching my tone, “the way he’s going about it seems to be making a lot of people unhappy.”

  “I don’t think keeping people happy is in his job description, but catching criminals and keeping this town safe is. If people take issue with his methods, then I suggest they live in a country where the police are part of the problem, and then start flapping their jaws about how he ought to do his job.”

  “I appreciate the vote of confidence.” Carter’s voice sounded behind Bobby. “But it’s not necessary.”

  Chapter Eighteen

  Bobby whirled around and gave Carter a sheepish grin. “It wasn’t me talking that way. I’m sure you’re doing a fine job.”

  “Uh-huh,” Carter looked over at me. “That seat taken?”

  “Just waiting on you,” I said.

  Bobby raised his eyebrows and looked from me to Carter as Carter walked past him and took the seat across from me. Carter never even glanced at him.

  Ally stepped up to the table and gave Carter a smile. “Can I get you some breakfast?” she asked.

  “The special looks good.”

  “Got it,” she said and gave me a wink before hurrying off.

  “Well, I guess I’ll see you around,” Bobby mumbled.

  I watched him walk out of the café and felt a guilty sense of accomplishment. “He didn’t even stay to eat breakfast. I must have hacked him off good.”

  “He was expecting you to invite him to sit down,” Carter said.

  “That wasn’t going to happen.”

  “But yet, you invited me.”

  I shrugged. “He pissed me off.”

  Carter grinned. “You’re great for a guy’s ego.”

  “Ego inflating isn’t part of my job description. Besides, I was just stating facts. Your job sucks and unless someone’s done it before, they have no right to an opinion on how it should be done.”

  “If only everyone in Sinful shared your opinion. I’m afraid most of them have gone the complete opposite direction. Deputy Breaux is fielding at least fifty calls a day from people screaming that I need to arrest someone.”

  “And do they have someone in mind?”

  “Some want Ida Belle behind bars. Others vote for the usual drunken douche bags who cause trouble and one thinks I should arrest Pastor Don.”

  “The preacher?”

  “She didn’t like his sermon on obesity.”

  I laughed as Pastor Don’s stock inched up in my mind. “He’s got some serious backbone to preach on obesity in a town that structures its entire religious schedule around banana pudding.”

  Carter nodded. “He said the Bible isn’t multiple choice.”

  Talk of the pastor brought my mind back around to church and the night before, and I sobered. “Did you ever figure out what happened at the church?”

  “No. And I shouldn’t be discussing it with one of the suspects, but since Old Lady Fontenot is a horrible witness and some of the evidence doesn’t match her report, I’m not going to pursue her cl
aims.”

  “What evidence?”

  He raised one eyebrow. “Normally, this is where I’d tell you that it’s none of your business, but I imagine everyone in Sinful already knows that the front doors of the church were open and set off the alarm. That’s what I responded to.”

  “But if the intruder ran out the front doors…”

  “How could Old Lady Fontenot see them run out the back? Exactly. And the odds of two different groups of people breaking into the church at the same time have to be astronomical.”

  I nodded. Astronomical and also exactly what happened, which made me wonder all over again what the other guys were doing there. Sinful seemed a pretty good trek from New Jersey to take a picture of a dead man.

  “I don’t suppose you’re any closer to catching the killer?” I asked.

  “You know I can’t tell you that.”

  “I know. I was just hoping…”

  He sighed. “You’re worried about Ida Belle. The truth is, I am too. I’m waiting on the lab reports, but if they can prove the poison I took from her shed was the same one used to kill Ted, I’m not going to have a choice in arresting her.”

  He looked so miserable that I felt the overwhelming urge to hug him, which was somewhat disconcerting in itself. I had never thought myself the overly sympathetic type. “I know. And even though it probably won’t make you feel any better, so does Ida Belle.”

  “Thanks. I notice you didn’t include Gertie in your declaration.”

  “Gertie will not take it well and will likely spend the rest of her life punishing you. Loyalty is a religion with Gertie.”

  “You’ve got her pegged.”

  I shrugged. “She’s easy, and there’s far worse character flaws.”

  Ally slid Carter’s breakfast in front of him and gave us both a big smile. “Is there anything else I can get you two?”

  We both shook our heads and Ally bounced off to another table.

  Carter tore into his breakfast with the same gusto I had. “Looks like you’re as hungry as I was,” I said.

  “Haven’t had a regular schedule lately. Seems every time I start to eat, something else comes up. No chance to grocery shop in a while and while I love Francine’s cooking, sometimes I just don’t want to hear the crap that I do when I come here.”

  I nodded, completely understanding his desire to get away from people, especially people who were judging your ability to do your job when they really had zero idea what that job entailed.

  Maybe it was my guilt at keeping evidence from Carter talking. Or maybe it was simply the fact that I’d only had two cups of coffee. Either way, I found myself unable to stop from saying, “Any time you want to avoid the masses and I’m home, you’re welcome to a free meal at my house. With Gertie, Ida Belle, and Ally all testing recipes on me, I’ve almost always got something worthwhile on tap. If not, then I always have my fallback roast beef sandwiches and chips.”

  Carter paused for a moment, his fork in midair, a piece of biscuit dangling from it. His expression was a mixture of surprise, satisfaction, and a slight hint of wariness. If he knew the real me, the wariness would have been a lot higher.

  “Are you asking me out on a date?” he asked, his lips quivering with the smile that wanted to break through.

  I felt a blush start on my neck and prayed it didn’t show in the dim light. “I didn’t ask you ‘out’ anywhere and I wouldn’t call feeding a hungry friend a date. You’re hungry and too busy to shop. You sometimes want to avoid people at all costs and I totally get that. It’s just food, Carter.”

  “So we’re friends?”

  “Yeah. I mean, unless you think otherwise.”

  He smiled at my obvious discomfort. “Friends it is then, and I just may take you up on your offer of a free meal. You’ve got the best cooks in Sinful supplying you.”

  “Very true.”

  I frowned, thinking about how easily I’d offered to feed Carter and wondering why he didn’t hit up some of the single women in Sinful for a meal. I was sure some existed and if they didn’t think Carter was a good catch, then I wasn’t sure what they were waiting on to arrive in the middle of the swamp. What the hell? I’d already stepped outside of my own boundaries of getting too personal, so I might as well assuage my curiosity.

  “I find it hard to believe that no other women in Sinful have made the same offer,” I said.

  “Well, the married ones don’t dare,” Carter said, “and offers from the single ones tend to come with strings attached.”

  “What kind of strings?”

  “The kind with a wedding band tied to the end. So I say a polite ‘no thanks.’”

  “But you accepted my offer,” I pointed out. “I’m single.”

  “Let’s just say I get the impression that you’re not looking for a husband.”

  “God no!” I was just learning how to manage friendship. The thought of having another person constantly in my space and taking his feelings into account every time I made a decision was a level of overwhelming I might never be ready for.

  He laughed. “See. I get a good meal out of the deal and don’t have to worry about you casting out a marital net.”

  I shook my head. “Is that the sort of thing guys have to worry about all the time?”

  “I guess if a guy is reasonably good-looking, has a decent job, and lives in a town with more single women than men, it’s a fairly good chance he spends some time dodging commitment.”

  I thought about the guys I’d seen roaming around Sinful and decided Carter didn’t have much by way of competition, at least that I’d observed. “I probably wouldn’t leave my house.”

  “Ha. That’s not really an option. Besides, I’m sure you get your share of unwanted male attention. Bobby hadn’t been back in town a day before he locked his sights on you.”

  “His aim is bad. I’m not interested.”

  Carter smiled. “Yeah, I kinda got that. If it makes you feel any better, I think Bobby did too.”

  I shrugged. “Fewer interruptions while eating, I suppose.”

  Carter cocked his head to the side and studied me. “You have an interesting way of looking at things.”

  “Not really. I just think simple is best and I tend to see things for what they are. I don’t like complications and I don’t do drama.”

  “I see. How’s that working out for you, being friends with Ida Belle and Gertie?”

  I smiled. “Some people are worth the hassle.”

  “Yeah. I guess they are.”

  ###

  I was happy to find the General Store free of customers when I walked in. The morning had already been entertaining enough. I wanted to quietly get my cat food and get home to prepare for my afternoon tree-climbing adventures. Walter was at the counter with his newspaper and smiled when I walked in.

  “If I didn’t see you sometime today,” he said, “I was going to call.”

  I slid onto a stool across the counter from him. “Why? What’s wrong?”

  “Nothing’s wrong with me. I wanted to check on Ida Belle.”

  I frowned. “You haven’t talked to her?”

  He sighed. “I’ve left at least ten messages, but she’s not returning my calls.”

  “Oh.” He looked a little upset and I instantly felt bad. “I’m sorry. I just assumed…”

  “She’s shutting me out because she’s afraid my being involved will cause me problems.”

  “Is she right?”

  “Of course she’s right, but that’s not the damned point!”

  I stared. I couldn’t remember seeing Walter that angry before. Frustrated and irritated, certainly, but this was different. While I understood that Ida Belle wanted to prevent her friend and longtime admirer from unnecessary trouble, I thought she might be making the wrong decision. Walter was a big boy. If he didn’t care about trouble, neither should Ida Belle.

  “I’m sorry,” I said. “I’ll talk to her if you want me to.”

  He waved a hand.
“Hell, no. The last thing I need is you interceding on my behalf. That just makes the whole thing even sadder.”

  I squirmed on my stool. This entire situation was way out of my element. Everything about relationships made me uncomfortable, even if they weren’t my own. Or maybe it was that other people’s relationship problems forced me to acknowledge my own issues on some level. Whatever. Either way, I wished Ida Belle would just talk to the man.

  “Then at least let me tell you how she’s doing,” I said.

  Walter relaxed a bit. “I’d appreciate that.”

  “Nothing else has happened on the police front, but I just had breakfast with Carter and he’s worried about the test results on the poison he took from Ida Belle’s shed. He’s expecting them anytime.”

  Shit. A wave of guilt washed over me as I realized I’d just repeated something Carter probably thought he’d told me in confidence.

  “But I never said that,” I said. “Understand?”

  “Don’t worry. He’ll never hear it from me, but I’m glad you told me. It’s always better to be prepared.”

  I nodded. “Ida Belle is holding up as well as you would expect. Aside from some hang-up calls and that incident with the rock through her window, things have been quiet. She’s sticking inside her house most of the time and either Gertie, me, or the Sinful Ladies are usually around…you know, just in case.”

  “In case she needs an alibi.” He shook his head. “I hadn’t even thought about that.”

  “Carter did. He’s the one who suggested I stick close by.”

  “Carter asked you for a favor?”

  “I don’t know that it was so much a favor as he figured if Ida Belle and I were both closed up inside her house, we couldn’t get in the middle of his investigation.”

  “Probably true.”

  “Anyway, the spunk is still there and I haven’t noticed any decrease in the sarcasm level.”

  “But?”

  I sighed. “But she’s worried. She’s careful to hide it…mostly, I think because she doesn’t want Gertie more stressed than she already is. But it’s wearing her down. I can see the cracks around the edges, and you and I both know what it takes for Ida Belle to crack.”