Sophie and Jake (Passports and Promises)

by Abigail Drake

  Suddenly, I felt crazy happy about the fact Sophie had never slept with anyone else. “Are you telling me you’re a virgin?”

  She nodded. “Eighteen years old and still as pure as the driven snow. How pathetic, right?”

  My heart swelled in that oddly possessive way again. “Not pathetic at all, and you’re wrong about me.”

  “What do you mean?

  “I’m…well…I’m like you. I’m a virgin, too.”

  Her shocked expression was hilarious. “What? Get out. You can’t be.”

  “I am. I swear it.”

  “But you’re so hot.”

  “Uh, thanks.”

  “And I’m sure you had tons of opportunities.”

  “A few, but I wanted to wait.”

  “For what?” she asked, incredulous.

  For you.

  I almost said the words out loud before I stopped myself, but they were true. I had been waiting for Sophie. I just didn’t know it until I met her. I decided to go with something safer.

  “For the right person.”

  We were at a red light, and she took advantage of the opportunity to throw her arms around my neck and give me a big kiss on the cheek. “I’m so glad. Because I was waiting for the right person, too.”

  Her eyes glowed in the fading light of the setting sun, and she stared at me with such joy and trust it floored me. I didn’t want to leave her. I didn’t want to go back home to my quiet, sad house, but I knew I had to go soon. Time was running out.

  After a relaxing dinner with her parents and a long chat over coffee, I stood up and announced it was time for me to head home.

  Sophie walked me to my car, dragging her feet, her sadness apparent in each movement she made. The now familiar bounce in her step was gone. She looked exactly how I felt, depressed that our time together had ended. For now.

  “I don’t want you to go,” she said.

  I leaned my back against my car and pulled her close. “It’s getting late, and I promised my dad I’d be home on time. If I don’t, he’ll worry. I can’t do that to him. Not right now.”

  “I know,” she said, tugging on the zipper of my jacket. “I’m being selfish and whiny. When will I see you again?”

  I kissed her forehead, her eyes, and her nose. “As soon as possible. I promise.” I tucked a lock of her hair behind her ear. “I’m going to tell my mom. About us.”

  “You are?”

  “Yes.”

  “I hope she’s okay with it,” she said. “She’s going through so much. I wouldn’t want to make her sad.”

  “You won’t. How could she be sad when I’m so happy?”

  She kissed me, her sweet lips telling me how much she would miss me. I kissed her back, telling her the same. Sophie and I didn’t need words sometimes. We knew exactly how the other felt without needing it articulated or explained.

  “Goodbye,” I said.

  She shook her head. “Not goodbye. Goodnight. Remember? Goodbyes are too permanent. I don’t like goodbyes.”

  I kissed her again. “Sorry. Goodnight, Soph. I’ll see you soon. Promise.”

  As I drove away, she stood by her door and watched me, waving until I was out of sight.

  Chapter 13

  ~Sophie~

  My phone rang as soon as I got back into the house. It was Jake. “I miss you already,” he said.

  I hugged the phone against my ear as I jogged up the steps to my room. “I miss you, too. You do realize this is crazy, right?”

  “Yep, but I can’t help it.”

  I closed the door to my room and flopped down on my bed. “Well, it was the first date.”

  “It was,” he said with a laugh. “But I feel like…I don’t know.”

  “Tell me.”

  “I feel like I’ve known you forever. I guess because we talked so much online and on the phone. Seeing you in person, though—”

  “Mano a mano.”

  “Yes. Mano a mano. I feel like…we were supposed to meet. Does that sound nuts?”

  I smiled so broadly my face hurt. “No, because I feel the same way. Now, to entertain you on your long drive home, let me tell you the story of when my father humiliated my first prom date.”

  I told him about how my father had taken out his collection of Civil War weapons to clean them moments before my date arrived, including a giant sabre.

  Jake laughed. “He collects Civil War weapons? Cool.”

  “Not cool at all. He also does reenactments. We used to have to go with him when we were small. It’s the most boring thing you can possibly imagine. And he has the whole Union uniform as well. I think he sees himself as a sort of Ulysses S. Grant, leading the troops. It’s so weird.”

  “So, did the poor guy ever dare to ask you on a second date?”

  “Uh, no. The guns were a huge turnoff, even though none of them have been fired in over two hundred years. The same guy dated Emily for a while, though, and ended up being a total jerk. I guess I dodged a bullet. No gun related pun intended.”

  “None taken,” said Jake. “But, speaking of second dates, when will I be able to see you again?”

  I considered it. “I think I should come to you this time. It’s only fair.”

  “In the decrepit purple Bug?”

  “Her name is Elsie, dude. Don’t offend her.”

  “Are you sure? I don’t mind driving to you.”

  “I know, but fair is fair. I mean as long as you tell your mom about me. I won’t come if she doesn’t know. It would feel…wrong.”

  “I’ll tell her. I promise.”

  “No pressure, Jake,” I said. “Do it when you feel the time is right.”

  We chatted until he reached his driveway, assuring me all was well, and we finally hung up. It was late when I plodded downstairs to the kitchen, but I was hungry and wanted a late snack. My mom stood in the kitchen, finishing up the dishes. I grabbed a towel and helped her.

  “So, what did you think of him?” I asked.

  She paused washing the dishes to look at me. “He looks older than you. He acts older than you, too.”

  “He’s been through a lot, Mom. We’re exactly the same age. Is there anything else?”

  She shrugged. “Well, he’s sweet, handsome, polite, charming, adorable, and obviously crazy about you. But there is one problem.”

  “What?” I asked, getting a little concerned.

  “He’s too annoyingly perfect.” She tried to look serious and failed.

  I elbowed her. “Shush. You’re right. He is perfect. And I’m crazy about him, too.”

  “I could tell, and so could your dad.”

  “Uh, oh.”

  “He seems okay with it, which is weird. He didn’t even bring out his gun collection this time.”

  I giggled. “I told Jake the whole story. He said he thinks reenacting sounds ‘cool.’ Dad will love that.”

  “He will.” She blew out a long breath. “And as happy as I am about this for you, I’m worried about your sister. I’m not sure how she’ll handle this news. She’s kind of in a weird place right now.”

  “I know,” I said. “And I’m not planning to tell her. Not yet at least.”

  Mom laughed. “You’re going to keep something a secret? From Sam?”

  I nodded, serious. “Yes. Because I don’t want to hurt her.”

  She gave me a hug, still holding a dinner plate in her hand. “You’re a good kid, Sophie.”

  “I am.” I pulled away and cleared my throat. “And because I’m a good kid, I’m also responsible, which leads me to my next question. Do you mind if I make an appointment with Dr. Miller? I want to go on the pill.”

  She dropped the plate she’d been holding and it landed with a loud crash on the kitchen floor, shattering into a million pieces. There was a moment of silence before my dad shouted from the living room.

  “Is everything okay in there?”

  “It’s fine,” said my mom. “We’re fine.”

  We both stood there, mo
tionless, staring at the broken plate. “Are we fine?” I asked. “Really?”

  She nodded. “Yes. Make the appointment on Monday. Better to be too early than too late, especially when it comes to something like birth control.”

  I had to agree. “And that’s exactly why I’m doing this.”

  Chapter 14

  ~Jake~

  Mom, there is something I want to talk with you about.”

  I poured her a cup of coffee and handed her a plate of steaming pancakes. I needed to prep her for what I was about to say.

  She smiled at me over her coffee cup. “You must have gotten up early. These pancakes look wonderful.”

  “Yeah. I couldn’t sleep.”

  I’d spent half the night thinking of Sophie and the other half worrying about how my mom would react to the news. Not conducive to restful sleep.

  She nodded. “I understand. I haven’t been sleeping well either. The doctor prescribed something to help…” Her voice trailed off for a second before she snapped back to attention. “But I’m not going to take anything unless I have to. The last thing I need right now is an addiction to sleeping pills, right? And, anyway, I have great news. Dylan seemed a lot better yesterday. He sat up and ate. Can you believe it? I think the meds are working. Finally. I told him you’d be in to see him today.”

  “Great,” I said. “Wonderful news. I’ll head over right after breakfast.”

  She speared a bite of pancake with her fork. “I would have told you last night, but I fell asleep before you got home. How was the movie, by the way?”

  “Oh. It was awesome.” More than awesome, but I couldn’t exactly explain that one to her.

  “Who did you go with? Tyler and those guys?”

  Here was my chance. “Um, that’s what I wanted to talk with you about. I went to the movies with Sophie Barnes.”

  She paused, her forehead wrinkling as she tried to place the name. “Sophie Barnes? As in Samantha’s little sister?”

  “Yes.”

  She put down her fork and wiped her mouth with a napkin. “You were at a movie with Sam’s sister. May I ask why?”

  “Because I like her.”

  “How do you even know her?” she asked, her tone clipped.

  “We met online. Yesterday was the first time I saw her in person. I…” I took a deep breath, realizing this was not going as well as I hoped. “I think I’m kind of falling for her, Mom.”

  She laughed, a strange, bitter sound. “Seriously? Oh, dear God, Jake. This is not what we need right now. I’m barely holding on here. Do you realize how hard things are for me at the moment?”

  “Of course, I do—” I said, but she cut me off.

  “No. I won’t discuss this with you. I can’t.” She got up and put her plate full of barely eaten pancakes in the sink, her movements angry and her back rigid. She turned to me, comprehension dawning in her eyes. “Wait. Your father knew about this, didn’t he?”

  I’d never seen her like this before. I wasn’t sure how to answer. Fortunately, my dad came in and rescued me, his expression wary. This would not end well for either of us and he knew it.

  “I gave him my permission to go.”

  She glared at him, putting down her coffee cup with such force some of the contents spilled on the counter, but she didn’t seem to notice. “How could you?”

  “Because life has to go on, sweetheart. Jake can’t stop living because of what’s going on with Dylan. It could be months before he’s better. We can’t ask him to put everything on hold until then. It isn’t fair.”

  “Fair? Do you know what isn’t fair? Lying to me. That’s not fair.” She looked at me, her expression one of pure frustration. “Did it have to be her? Of all the girls in the whole world, did you have to pick the one who would hurt your brother most? Did you have to pick Sophie Barnes?”

  “Yes,” I said, my voice soft. “Because I had no choice. When you meet her, you’ll understand.”

  She shoved her arms into her coat and grabbed her purse and car keys. “No, I won’t, because I’m not going to meet her. Ever. End of discussion.”

  She went outside, slamming the door behind her. A few seconds later, we heard her gun the engine and pull away. Even her car sounded angry. Strange, but true.

  “This isn’t about you, you know.”

  I nodded, swallowing a lump that had formed somewhere deep in my throat. “I didn’t think so.”

  “And it isn’t about Sophie, either.”

  “What is it?”

  He let out a sigh. “It’s about Dylan, of course. Even though your mom doesn’t blame Sam for what happened, being around her or her family is tricky. The night Dylan got sick was one of the worst nights of our lives. Even though Sam saved him, it still…” He looked away, unable to me my gaze. “Every time we see her or talk with her, it brings all those awful feelings back to the surface. Helplessness. Rage. Anger. Sorrow. It’s like we’re barely keeping it in check. All it takes is one little trigger, and it all falls apart again.”

  “And Sam is one of those triggers?”

  “Yep, and it seems so is Sophie, by association.”

  I let out a frustrated sigh. “But Mom talks with Sophie’s mom all the time, and it seems to help her.”

  “I know. Your mom and I have discussed it, Jake. She realizes it isn’t logical, but grief isn’t a logical thing. And your mom is grieving for Dylan, for how much he’s suffering and for how much pain he’s in all the time. It’s…agonizing.

  “I’m sorry, Dad.”

  He gave me a hug. “Let’s go to the hospital and see your brother. Your mom will come around. Give her some time.”

  I had my doubts, especially when we arrived at the hospital. As my dad went to talk to Dylan’s nurse to get updates, I headed to his room. Alone.

  Mom didn’t see me at first. She sat in a chair next to Dylan’s bed, her back to the door, clinging to his hand, as if she could pull him back to us with pure force of will. Dylan was curled up on his side, facing her, his eyes barely open. He gave me a ghost of a smile when I walked in.

  “Jakey,” he said, his voice sounding raw and rough.

  My mom stiffened, as if my presence disturbed her. It made me feel awful, but I went to stand next to her by Dylan’s bed and forced myself to smile.

  “Hey, big brother. Have you spent enough time lazing around here at the spa? Are you finally ready to come home?”

  He laughed, the sound as strange and foreign as his voice. The person on the bed didn’t look like Dylan, or sound like Dylan, so I almost had to remind myself it was Dylan. Only when I looked into his eyes did I catch a glimpse of the person I knew and loved hiding deep inside his shell of a body. It wasn’t much, but it gave me hope.

  “He’ll come home when he’s ready,” said my mom, refusing to glance my way.

  Ugh. She was really ticked off this time. Odd for her. Normally, she kept things on an even keel. Usually, my dad was the one with the temper. Not today, though.

  Dylan watched her carefully, his eyes on her face. “Why are you mad at Jake?” he asked. When she didn’t answer, he turned to me. “Is this about Sophie?”

  My mom turned to me, even angrier than before. “You told him?”

  I swallowed hard. “I thought he was sleeping. I didn’t realize he heard me. I’m sorry, Mom.” I wished a giant hole could open in the floor and swallow me up. Why had I told Dylan? “I don’t want to make things worse. Maybe I should go.”

  “Maybe you should,” she said, her eyes cold.

  “If that’s what you want. Fine.” I blinked away tears, not sure what to do. Dad had driven me, and he had the keys. I’d have to find him if I wanted to drive myself home, and I had no idea where he was or what was holding him up.

  Dylan let out a noise of pure irritation; so loud, it startled us both. “Stop it. You’re both being ridiculous.”

  She sat back in her chair. “Me? I’m being ridiculous?”

  “Yes.” He pointed to a glass of water
on his nightstand and she jumped to get it for him. After he took a few sips, he sat up straighter. “Sophie’s like an innocent bystander. She had nothing at all to do with what happened. And it’s not Sam’s fault either.”

  It was more than we’d heard him say in weeks. Mom shot me a look, but, for the first time since I’d entered the room, she didn’t seem angry. She waved a hand, indicating I should come closer. I pulled up a chair and sat next to her.

  “I would never do anything to purposefully hurt you, Dylan. You know that, right?” I asked.

  “Neither would I,” said Mom.

  He rolled his eyes. “Don’t be idiots. I know.”

  He gave me a look so much like the old Dylan I had to smile. “Are you sure about this?” I asked.

  He settled back onto his pillows, as if the effort it took to speak exhausted him. “Sophie’s a sweet kid, and I love both of you. I just wish you wouldn’t be such dickheads.”

  My mom laughed, unshed tears glistening in her eyes. “I’ll try. I promise.” She put her hand on my shoulder and mouthed the words, I’m sorry.

  Me, too, I mouthed back to her. Dylan’s eyes were closing as he faded back into the depression-induced fog he now lived in, but I couldn’t let him go. Not yet.

  “Wait,” I said. “Dad will be here any minute, Dylan. He’ll want to talk with you, too.”

  “Dad?” he asked, slurring his words slightly, his eyes slits.

  As if on cue, the door to Dylan’s room opened, and my father came in. He must have someone heard Dylan call his name. “I’m here. Is there anything you need, son?”

  Dylan’s eyes opened. He focused on my father’s face and smiled before his eyelids fluttered closed again.

  “A beer?” he asked, his voice soft.

  My dad laughed. “No, I don’t think so.”

  “Paper…and a pen?” he asked. “Journaling might help me keep my head straight.”

  “Sure,” said my dad. “I’ll get it right now. I saw some in the gift shop earlier.”

  He made a move to leave, but my mom stopped him. “No. You stay here. Jake and I will go.”