A Beautiful Forever

by Lilliana Anderson

  I’ll b there in 10

  Feeling nervous all of a sudden, I get up and head to the ladies' room to check my reflection, frowning when I see the painted lady looking back at me. Turning on the tap, I grab some paper hand towel out of the dispenser and wipe the lipstick off my face. I look ridiculous. This isn’t me.

  Looking at myself again, I take a deep breath. “Don’t do this, nothing changes,” I coach myself. I can’t believe I was just entertaining the thought of having something more with Elliot. Bloody Naomi, I had this all under control. Didn’t I?

  Elliot

  I borrow Shane’s car and drive to the club to pick up Paige. She's waiting outside with Naomi, who’s leaning up against some guy. When they see me pull up, Naomi waves at me then nudges Paige towards the passenger-side door.

  “Have fun!” she sing songs as Paige climbs in.

  “Has Naomi hooked up?” I ask once the doors shut, as I watch Naomi walk back inside the club entwined with that guy.

  “She has, thanks for coming to get me,” she says pulling on her seat belt.

  “You rescued me actually. I hate cricket,” I confide in her.

  “Isn’t it blasphemy to say that!” she replies mockingly.

  “It is, don’t tell anyone.” I wink as I pull out into the traffic and start to make my way through the streets to turn us back towards the flat, although I’m not interested in returning to watch cricket again.

  “You want a coffee?” I ask when I spot an open café.

  Paige looks ahead to where I’m indicating. “Yeah, I do actually.”

  We keep our eye out for a parking spot, finding one quickly and walking back to the café. It’s surprisingly busy, and we have to line up behind another four people to order.

  “Don’t take this the wrong way, but you look really beautiful tonight,” I tell her, nudging her lightly in the arm with my elbow.

  She laughs, and I prepare for the coming lecture. I know I shouldn’t have said anything, but I couldn’t really help myself – the woman is gorgeous, she should be told.

  “Thank you Elliot,” is all she says.

  “Wait, what? Where’s the brow beating?” I ask jokingly.

  She shrugs and smiles at me as we reach the front of the line, I order for both of us, and we go and sit at a table near the window while we wait.

  “So why did you go to a salsa club if you didn’t want to dance?” I ask, watching her play with the packets of sugar on the table. She's reorganising them, so they're lined up in their colour groups.

  “I don’t know why,” she answers. “I hate clubs; I really do – all that gyrating against strangers,” she makes a face to illustrate her distaste before continuing, “it just… isn’t my thing. I suppose I thought a salsa club would be a bit different, and it was. It didn’t have the massive crowd, but it still had the gyrating and the touching. So I was glad to leave. Thank you again for coming to get me.”

  “It was my pleasure Paige,” I say placing my hand over hers to stop her fiddling with the sugars. “Relax.”

  Quickly withdrawing her hand, she places it in her lap, her cheeks flush as she looks around the room nervously.

  Feeling an emptiness in my palm where her hand was, I move the sugar to the side and watch her flit, curious as to her behaviour. “Paige, does it also bother you when I touch you?” I ask, suddenly concerned.

  The flush on her face seems to increase as she focuses her attention on me and meets my eyes. “No,” she breathes, shaking her head lightly. “No, it’s just the opposite. That’s what bothers me.”

  Paige

  Did I seriously just say that? I see confusion pass over his face before the realisation of what I admitted dawns on him. I’m ever so grateful when our coffees are brought over, and our attentions are diverted as we accept them and thank the server.

  He’s watching me, his eyes boring through me as I take a shaky sip from my coffee. “Oh, fuck that’s hot!” I exclaim, almost spitting the scalding liquid back into my mug.

  A smile plays on the edge of his lips as he watches me fiddle about with a napkin as I wipe my mouth and try to cool my tongue.

  “So um… Naomi’s a fantastic dancer. You should see the way she twirls around the dance floor. I’ll have to ask her if she’s had lessons when I see her next,” I say, trying to salvage some sort of normal conversation.

  “Paige,” Elliot says reaching across the table and placing his hand over my own. My breath catches in my throat as I close my eyes to the feeling his touch evokes inside me. I’m aroused and frightened all at the same time. My fear wins out and I try to pull my hand away, but I’m met with resistance as he encloses his hand firmly over my own. “Please don’t pull away,” he whispers.

  With a shaky breath, I open my eyes, focusing on our combined hands. I catch myself thinking about what it would be like to give in to this attraction between us and simply go with the flow for a change instead of trying to control everything. It’s so tempting, being half way around the world, to just pretend everything will be ok… so tempting.

  I place my other hand on top of his, my thumb caressing his skin absently as I meet his intense eyes. The attraction between us crackles and sparks through the air between us, numbing our senses to all that surrounds us. Closing my eyes, I inhale slowly in an attempt to calm my rapid heart. “Please Elliot, just let go,” I whisper, a frown etched on my face as my words betray my feelings.

  The moment his hand retreats, I’m at a loss. The ache in my chest seems to slide down into my stomach and turn sour. “I’m sorry Elliot. It's not you ok?”

  “Save it Paige,” he says, unable to hide the hurt in his face. “I don’t need any speeches ok. I know where we stand.”

  I attempt to fill the emptiness in my hands by wrapping them around my mug and taking careful sips.

  “So, um… Naomi can salsa can she?” he asks, ending the silence that was stretching out uncomfortably between us.

  “She can. She's really amazing actually,” I gush, so grateful to him for speaking normally to me.

  Despite the easy conversation that continues between us, I can’t help but feel that things have changed between us and not in a good way. Maybe I need to move out and let him go so he can find someone else. But, the mere thought of cutting my ties with him causes my chest to constrict and tears to spring into my eyes.

  “Paige, what’s wrong? Are you ok?” Elliot asks quickly as he watches me clearing my throat and blinking rapidly as I try to get a handle on my emotions.

  “I’m fine Elliot,” I lie. “I just bit my tongue.”

  “Oh,” he laughs, settling back into his seat. “Are you bleeding? Do you want some water?”

  “No, I’m fine. It's okay now. Are you ready to go?” I ask, pushing back my chair and reaching for my bag.

  “Sure, lets go,” he says being certain to give me enough space to move past him as he opens the door for me. He stands so there’s no chance for us to touch accidentally and continues to keep his distance as we walk back to the car. I feel a deep sense of regret about how I reacted earlier. I miss his closeness already; I miss the gentle brushes when our bodies connect, and I miss his hand on the small of my back to guide me through the door. They’re small gestures that had become normal, and now they’re gone…

  Chapter 11

  Elliot

  That moment in the coffee shop when she told me to let go, keeps playing over and over in my mind, and it hurts like hell every single time. I’ve been doing my best to maintain the new ‘no touching’ policy that Paige established between us. But it’s hard. We've spent the best part of a month getting to know each other, and I didn’t realise how much of a habit touching her had become. Now, every time we go out as a group or when I walk home with her, I have had to consciously remind myself to give her physical space. I feel kind of empty now, and even though I’m trying to maintain our friendship, it’s hard and I’ve been a bit lax in meeting her after work these past few days.

 
It’s not that I’m avoiding her. I just need to work things out in my own head. She told me that it bothers her that she likes it when I touch her. Just thinking that sentence hurts my head, and I don’t understand how I’m supposed to behave around her, so I’m doing my best to stay at work for as long as possible, keeping busy until I figure out how to handle this.

  “Any last minute clients?” I ask Celsey, our American receptionist who arrived on her working visa not long after I did.

  “Hi Elliot,” she says smiling brightly as she looks up from what she was doing and tucks her shoulder length blonde hair behind her ear to keep it from falling over her eyes. “Looking for extra hours?”

  “Yeah, I could do with the cash,” I answer. It’s only a half lie. I'm really just trying to stay back so I have a good reason not to meet up with Paige again today.

  “Can’t we all,” she laughs as she taps at the keys on the computer in front of her and peers at the information on the screen. “There aren’t any PT clients, but I heard Jessica saying that she’s struggling today and wants to go home early, do you think you could take her last couple of clients on?”

  “Absolutely, I’ll go and let her know. Thanks Celsey,” I smile as I turn to go and find Jessica to tell her I’ll take over for her.

  Paige

  “Looks like you finally pushed hard enough to chase him away,” Andrea comments as we exit the salon, this is the fourth day in a row that Elliot hasn’t been waiting for me.

  “I think I’ve fucked everything up with him,” I tell her.

  “Paige, tell him how you feel. He's obviously crazy about you. I’ve never known a guy to hang around outside a hair salon like he does for someone who’s just a friend.”

  “What the hell am I supposed to tell him? I don’t know how I feel about him Andrea.”

  “Bull shit,” she says bluntly.

  “Excuse me?” I ask surprised.

  “Bull shit you don’t know how you feel Paige. Now go and sort it out with him, I want you smiling at work tomorrow – that frown of yours drives customers away,” she comments as she walks off leaving me standing in front of the salon as I contemplate exactly what I should do.

  Pulling out my phone, I text Naomi. Is Elliot at home?

  I wait for a couple of minutes for her to respond, her answer the deciding factor in which way I go.

  No not yet, she replies.

  Knowing what I have to do, I put a call through to his work.

  “City Point Club, Celsey speaking,” answers a girl with an American accent.

  “Oh, um hi, I was just calling to ask if Elliot Roberts is working this evening,” I enquire.

  “Yes he is, would you like me to see if has time for another client?” she asks.

  “Um, what time would that be?” I ask.

  “He’s booked up until seven thirty.”

  “Ah, that’s probably too late for me. Thanks for your help though.”

  “No problem,” Celsey says as I disconnect the call and work out my timing. If I leave now, I’ll get to his work in time to be waiting for him for a change.

  Elliot

  As I exit the building that houses the City Point Club, I’m more than ready to go back to the flat and just veg out with a movie for a couple of hours. Based on the whiteboard this morning only Shane, Paige and I are due home for dinner. The others are either working or going out with their significant others.

  “Elliot, wait up!” a female voice calls to me the moment my foot touches the pavement outside. I turn, seeking out a face I might recognise and notice one of the girls I trained this afternoon smiling and walking towards me. “Are you finished for the day?” she asks as she stops in front of me, she has a tiny figure with long wavy caramel coloured hair and large brown eyes, although I can’t remember her name.

  “Yeah, I’m just headed home,” I reply, smiling politely at her.

  “Could I interest you in maybe grabbing dinner, or a drink?” she asks hopefully, adjusting her hair and smiling brightly at me, in an attempt to appear flirtatious.

  Clearing my throat, I look up at the building feeling awkward as I work out my reply, “Um, what was your name?”

  “Kerry,” she responds quickly.

  “Right, Kerry. Listen, thanks for the offer but I’m expected elsewhere tonight,” I lie, trying to make this easier on both of us.

  “Oh, well maybe some other time?” she presses.

  Smiling I reach out and touch her arm in an attempt to let her down gently. “Listen, I’m sure you’re a lovely girl,” I start.

  Paige

  As I walk towards Elliot’s work, I spot him standing outside talking to a tiny girl who is obviously flirting with him. My heart starts to hammer against my breastbone as I witness him smile and reach out to touch her arm. In that moment, my rational mind leaves my body, and I find myself standing boldly in between them, behaving like a woman scorned.

  “Who the hell are you?” I practically spit at the tiny super pretty girl with her beautiful hair and perfect body who I instantly dislike.

  Elliot cuts his head towards me, and frowns like he’s not really sure what I’m doing here. Truthfully, I don’t even know what I’m doing here – I seem to have lost my mind somewhere along the way.

  “Paige? What are you doing? Why are you here?”

  “Oh I’m sorry; you have a girlfriend. I should have known,” the tiny girl I hate squeaks out in her annoyingly cute voice.

  I simply glare at her as Elliot frowns at my behaviour. “Kerry, I’m sorry but I don’t think it’s a good idea. Thank you for the invite though,” Elliot tells her kindly before he takes my arm and guides me forward until we’re out of tiny Kerry’s earshot. “Paige, what are you doing?” he smiles patiently, his voice calm as he searches my face for answers.

  “Well I’m sorry. I was trying to be nice and meet you at work for a change. I didn’t realise you were staying late at work so you could pick up,” I bite out churlishly.

  “What the fuck Paige?” he demands confused, “I just knocked her back. Right in front of you.”

  “Whatever Elliot, I saw you touching her arm.”

  “Are you serious?! Paige, I was trying to let her down kindly – she’s a client. This is my work. I can’t be a bastard and just tell her to fuck off because I’m interested in a girl who hates that she likes it when I touch her. It doesn’t sound quite right does it?” he asks, a slight edge to the calm he’s fighting to keep in his voice.

  “I don’t hate it,” I whisper as I close my eyes in a fight to make my internal defences let me open up to him. “This…this is hard for me ok? I haven’t been close to anyone for years… and I…I’m just not sure how to do it.”

  “I don’t want to push you Paige. But I don’t know what I’m supposed to do.”

  My mouth opens and closes as I fight to find something to say, “I don’t know either,” is all I manage.

  He looks up to the heavens for some sort of answer as he sighs and chews the side of his lips. “Let’s just go ok?” he says as he puts his hand on the small of my back and prompts me to walk in the direction of the train station. The return of that simple touch is more beautiful than I can bear, and I have to pretend to brush my hair out of my face to catch the tear that escapes from my eye.

  Elliot

  We travell home in virtual silence, both of us inside our own heads attempting to work out how we're supposed to be together. One thing I know for sure is that I’m obviously crazy about her, she keeps pushing and pushing at me, and I just stand there, taking every single blow because I know that eventually she’ll stop, and she’ll let me in.

  “Finally!” Shane says as we come through the door, “I was just about to call you both, dinner’s almost ready.”

  Since he was home first he took on the chef duties and has made some pasta for dinner. Paige and I move straight towards the kitchen and help get drinks, bowls and cutlery out to set the table while Shane strains the penne and mixes it with the sau
ce.

  I don’t think I’ve sampled Shane’s cooking before, it’s um…interesting. I’m doing my best to eat it without grimacing.

  “Uh…Shane, what did you do to this pasta?” Paige asks laughing, seeming much more relaxed now than she was earlier. She’s poking at a clump of penne stuck together, and only half cooked.

  “Man, I don’t know. I put it in boiling water and cooked it for ten minutes like the pack says, but…”

  “Did you stir it?” she asks.

  He sits up in his chair and looks at her, pressing his lips tightly together as he thinks. “No, I don’t think I did.”

  “Well, there’s your problem, you have to stir it a couple of times while it’s cooking,” she tells him gently.

  He nods his scruffy blond head, slowly committing this new information to memory. Suddenly, the theme music for ‘The Wicked Witch of the West’ cuts through the quiet of the room.

  “My butt’s ringing,” he says as he shifts in his seat to remove his phone from his back pocket, before leaving the table to take the call.

  Paige watches him walk into the lounge room before she turns to me, “She is going to kill him if she ever hears her ring tone,” she comments, referring to Shane’s girlfriend. Coral seems like a nice enough girl. She's just a little full on, I guess. She likes to know exactly what Shane is doing at all times, and despite joking that she’s a ball and chain – Shane is very happy to jump whenever she calls.

  I look at Paige for a moment, amazed at the change in her demeanour. She seems so much happier now that we’re back at the flat. Tilting her head to see Shane, she seems to be contemplating the same thing I am.

  I can’t pretend to eat this food anymore and put my fork down. “Are you going to eat that?” I ask Paige, who is doing little more than poking her food around in circles.

  She opens her eyes wide and mouths ‘NO’ as she shakes her head from side to side.

  I glance at Shane, who has his back to us, and grab the bowls, quickly dumping their contents into the bin before he has the chance to see. When he walks back into the kitchen, I’m already at the sink busily washing out the bowls.