When It's Love

by Lucy Kevin

  “But if I don’t climb with Nicholas today,” Morgan said, “who will?”

  “I’ll do it.” The words were out of Rachel's mouth before she'd realized they were coming.

  Had she really just offered to take Morgan’s place again? Why would she do something as stupid as that?

  Then again, she knew these cliffs and could still remember climbing this particular route a dozen times or more. Usually without many safety precautions. She shuddered, thinking of the risks she'd taken. But there was another part of her that was already looking up at the cliff face, planning the best route as if a piece of her past was calling to her. Again.

  The production team was clearly eager for her to take over for her sister. “Actually, if you were to climb today, Rachel, we’d have really good continuity. Not to mention the fact that the two of you have great on-screen chemistry.”

  Well, she supposed there was no backing out now as a smiling Nicholas brought the climbing harness over and she stepped into it with the familiarity that experience brings.

  “I’ve seen pictures of you climbing. Did you ever do it here?”

  Though his mouth was so close to hers as he adjusted the straps that it was hard to think about anything other than kissing him—even the climb ahead—Rachel nodded. “Not for a long time, though.”

  “I’m sure you’ll be even more of a natural on the cliffs than you were out on the ocean in the kayak,” he told her. “Now, before we begin, we need to go through the safety words for climbing.”

  Behind him, the camera was rolling, yet this didn’t feel anything like a rehearsed video presentation—it just felt real and natural. For many other people, this focus on safety would have felt like a waste of time, a task they undertook simply because they had to. Yet, with Nicholas, it felt as if he was genuinely giving her a climbing lesson, and all his attention was on her. Of course, though his attention had been on her for days, it hadn’t been until this morning that she’d realized how much she had been missing it...or just how much she appreciated it.

  “Don’t start climbing until I say ‘climb on,’ and when you’re ready to start, shout ‘climbing’ up to me. Rock faces can do strange things to sound.”

  “I remember.”

  He went through the other basic climbing communication words with her, covering everything from the essential “on belay” and “off belay” for managing the safety ropes, to the more urgent terms like “watch me” and “falling!”

  “Although, hopefully,” he added with a reassuring grin, “we won’t need that last one.”

  For a moment, Rachel's actuary-trained brain couldn’t help but think about the statistics for rock-climbing injuries and fatalities. It should have been all she needed as a reminder to herself that she shouldn’t be doing this. That she couldn’t be a wild, adventurous person anymore when she knew everything that could go wrong on climbs like this, from unsafe ropes to being struck by falling rocks.

  And yet, here she was, taking the helmet Nicholas held out for her to wear. Both of their helmets had small video cameras on them. From there, it was a matter of focusing on the basics of hand- and footholds, the need to open her hips to stay close to the wall, and the importance of climbing with her whole body.

  They were just getting ready to go when Rachel suddenly remembered the whole reason she had come to the cliffs in the first place. She reached into her pocket and pulled out the shark tooth necklace. “Charlotte took it,” she said with an apologetic shake of her head. “I don't know why she did it, and I'll make sure she apologizes to you properly later, but I thought you’d want it back.”

  “Thanks, although she can have it if she wants it.”

  “She can?”

  “The first surfer I ever met gave it to me. Am I the first surfer she's met?”

  “You are.”

  “Then she should definitely have it. I'll just put it back on until I see her again.”

  “Aren't you angry that she took it?”

  “Of course not. I know what it's like to not want to let something beautiful go.” The way he said it made Rachel think he wasn't talking about the necklace anymore, but about her. “Plus, she’s a good kid. That’s all that matters. Are you ready to climb?”

  To her surprise, she was. After she nodded, he turned back to the film crew, who gave them the thumbs-up.

  “I’m climbing,” Nicholas said, and set off up the rock face. Rachel watched as he locked in spikes and clamps, getting set to belay the first stage of the climb for her. “On belay,” he yelled back down to her. “Climb on.”

  It was her turn now. Despite his instruction and her fairly clear memories of this route, the first few moves were still difficult. It was like her brain was trying to reject what her body already knew how to do, almost as if she’d lost her trust in her ability to climb.

  But even though their climb started out slow, Nicholas was there above her, waiting patiently. He kept just the right amount of slack on the rope as he belayed for her, giving her enough tension to feel supported without it turning into a restriction.

  “You’re doing really well,” he called down. “Keep going.”

  At last, Rachel made it to the spot where Nicholas was waiting, wedged in on a small outcropping of rock. She was out of breath, and her limbs were a little shaky, but at the same time she felt incredibly—and wonderfully—alive.

  “Now you belay for me while I do the next part. All right?” When she nodded, he said, “Climbing.”

  He headed up the rock face with easy, controlled movements, and she couldn’t help but enjoy watching his well-honed muscles flex every time he stretched for a new handhold or foothold. She focused on keeping the right tension on the line as he climbed, knowing how much trust he was placing in her. If he fell, she was effectively all that stood between him and a long drop.

  Fortunately, he made it to the top easily, disappearing up over the edge of the cliff. Which meant that it was her turn now, as he shouted down for her to climb on.

  Slowly, she felt the rhythm of climbing these cliffs come back to her. How her body was meant to move, finding handholds with greater and greater certainty while her feet found purchase on familiar parts of the rock. As the old grips came back to her more quickly now, the world narrowed down to just her, Nicholas, and the craggy rock face.

  And then, suddenly, her hand slipped as it reached for a hold that just wasn’t quite there…

  “Falling!”

  Rachel went into free fall, the sky blue and big above her before the rope attached to her went tight, the harness digging into her as it took her weight.

  But, actually, it was Nicholas taking her weight. And as she swung out from the rock face, she knew that she was completely in his hands. Because if he let go…

  No, he wouldn't. Even breathing hard with her heart hammering in her chest, Rachel knew that he would never let go.

  “I’ve got you,” he called down. “I can lower you down to ground level easily if that's what you like.”

  Perhaps she should have said yes and let him slowly lower her to the ground, but she couldn’t. Not here. Not now.

  “I want to finish this. Help me get back to the wall.”

  Nicholas gently swung her back to the wall, and Rachel scrabbled at it. As soon as her hands and feet locked on, she yelled, “Okay, climbing!” She could still feel the adrenaline pounding in her, and it felt good. Really good. She concentrated on each handhold, determined that she wasn’t going to let this beat her.

  It was hard going. She’d lost ground when she fell and making that up meant more effort, more work for muscles that were already burning. She pushed on, though, and move by painstaking move she made her way farther up.

  “You’re doing really great,” Nicholas called above her.

  She began to move faster and faster as her instincts for climbing flooded back through her. Plus, it was so much easier to have confidence when Nicholas had already caught her and she knew for sure that he'd be there
for her, no matter what.

  “You’re almost there,” he called down to her, and she was amazed to look up and realize that in just a few more feet, she would be up over the lip of the cliff. Seeing the last few moves in her head, she completed them one after another, letting her feel for the climb guide her.

  When Rachel finally pulled herself up over the edge, she rolled onto her back on solid ground once again, then looked over at Nicholas. If her legs hadn't felt so much like wobbly rubber at that moment, she knew she would have jumped up and kissed him.

  In lieu of that, she smiled and said, “I did it.”

  “Yes,” he said, his answering smile telling her just how proud he was of her achievement. “Yes, you did.”

  CHAPTER ELEVEN

  At the top of the cliffs, Nicholas felt his own heart beat faster as he saw how ecstatically, joyously alive Rachel looked, despite the fall she'd taken halfway through the climb.

  “Everything looks so beautiful from up here, doesn’t it?”

  “It does,” he agreed, “especially when you get up here the hard way.”

  But the view wasn't anywhere near as beautiful as Rachel. He was so proud of her. She’d been so determined. Anyone else who hadn’t climbed in years would have let him lower them down to ground level after the fall. But not Rachel.

  Even more incredible was how she managed to combine her strength of spirit with being a mother. She’d done so well bringing up her little girl, creating such a safe, loving family for Charlotte.

  “Are you ready to abseil back down now?” Nicholas asked.

  “Yes, I think I've gotten my breath back enough now to head back to the bottom.”

  Most people he worked with didn’t pay the kind of attention she did while he ran through the basic techniques for getting back down the cliff wall. And the look on Rachel’s face as she stepped backward and deliberately pushed off into the air was so beautiful that he knew he would have lost control and kissed her just then if only he'd been able to fly through the air beside her.

  The route down didn’t take anywhere near as long as climbing up, and Rachel skipped easily from push-off point to push-off point. She was smiling broadly as they reached the bottom, not seeming to care at all that the cameras were on her, her happiness so big that he swore he could almost feel it inside of himself, too.

  “That was great,” Rachel said while Nicholas unclipped her. “Really, really great.” She was practically bouncing in place.

  He hoped she would want to celebrate her great achievement of climbing up the cliffs, because he was still on top of his own adrenaline rush. One that had far less to do with the climbing than it had to do with being near Rachel.

  “We got some truly amazing shots!” Morgan said from her spot by the camera. “Although when you came away from the wall and started falling, Rachel, I almost had a heart attack.”

  “I was always safe,” Rachel assured her. “Nicholas had me.”

  That was true, but it felt great to hear her say it...and to also hear a brand new note of trust in her voice.

  “Even so, you gave me a fright,” Morgan said as she gave her sister a hug. “Come on, let’s head back to my place and celebrate another good shoot. With copious quantities of cough medicine, in my case.”

  Nicholas smiled, because he’d been close to suggesting the same thing. But his smile faded a little when Rachel glanced at her watch and said, “I'd love to, but I have to go pick up Charlotte.”

  “In that case, maybe you can give me a ride back, too?” Nicholas suggested. He didn’t want his time with her to end yet, and he knew his film crew would be busy working on edits for the rest of the afternoon.

  After the way she'd pulled back after their kayaking trip, he had been expecting some hint of reluctance. This time, however, she smiled and said, “Sure, if you don’t mind coming with me to pick up Charlotte first?”

  “I'd love it.” Climbing and surfing didn’t frighten him, but the thought that he might have waited too long to have people like Rachel and Charlotte in his life…that was what was scary.

  “In that case,” Morgan said, “it looks like I’ll just head home alone and tuck myself back in for a nap.” She was clearly relieved to be able to go get some more rest.

  After dropping Morgan off, as the two of them headed toward Charlotte's school in Rachel's car, Nicholas thought about asking her to be his volunteer for all the other pieces they still needed to shoot around the island. After doing both the kayaking and climbing segments with her, he knew for sure now that she would enjoy it. But at the same time he had a pretty good sense that trying to push her into anything would only make her push back even harder.

  Things had always worked out for him before, though. Surely, things with Rachel would, too, wouldn't they? After all, hadn’t she found her way into this shoot today, even when it had been Morgan who was supposed to have been taking part? He was more thankful than ever that Charlotte had “borrowed” his shark tooth. If not for that, Rachel wouldn't have come to the cliffs.

  Charlotte was waiting outside when they got to the school, and Nicholas loved watching the two of them hug, both of their mouths wide with radiant smiles.

  “Nicholas,” Charlotte exclaimed, “you're here again!”

  “I am and happy to see you, as always.”

  But after she glanced at the shark tooth that was back around his neck, she didn't quite meet his eyes. “Are you sure you're happy to see me?”

  “Of course I am.”

  Rachel leaned down and whispered something to her daughter. Charlotte's face was flushed as the brave little girl made herself look him in the eye. “I'm sorry. I shouldn't have taken your necklace.”

  “It’s all right,” Nicholas assured her with a smile. “In fact, I was hoping you would accept it as a gift.”

  Charlotte's eyes grew as big as saucers. “You want to give it to me?”

  “The first surfer I ever met gave it to me. And since I'm the first surfer you have ever met, I think you should have it now.”

  With great ceremony that he could see positively thrilled the six-year-old, he drew the necklace off of his own neck and placed it around Charlotte's.

  “Mommy, look! Nicholas gave me his necklace!”

  “And it looks amazing on you, sweetie. Just remember, you'll have to take it off every night before you go to bed so that it doesn't poke you while you're sleeping.”

  “Okay,” Charlotte said as she ran her fingers gently over the smooth, cool shark tooth and the rougher leather that held it in place around her neck, “I'll remember. I promise. My rabbit can wear it when I'm sleeping.”

  Rachel put an arm around her daughter and gave her a gentle squeeze. “How about if we go to the playground and get ice cream?”

  Charlotte jumped up and down. “Ice cream!”

  “Ice cream sounds good to me, too,” Nicholas agreed.

  They headed over to a local playground where a couple of moms sat on the benches while their kids played in the sandbox or clambered over a large climbing frame. From the nearby ice cream store, Charlotte chose strawberry, Nicholas had mint chocolate chip, but Rachel was the truly wild one in the bunch when she ordered a double cone with mint and mango. At his surprised look, she laughed and said, “It's an acquired taste. Want some?”

  Even though he'd risked plenty around the world over the years, the only reason he dared to risk that particular taste combination was because of all the risks she'd already taken with him. Surely, he could take one for her now. And in the end, he was pleasantly surprised by how good the unexpected combination tasted.

  As they walked around the edge of the playground, Nicholas' phone started dinging with photos the production team was sending him from the climb today. In all of them, Rachel was clinging to the rock face, looking determined and fearless and happy.

  “Rachel, Charlotte, look at these photos they just sent from the shoot today.” He held out the phone to them. “Aren't they great?”

  “Th
at's you climbing a rock, Mommy?”

  “Yes, that's me.”

  Charlotte's eyes were wide as she looked from the phone to her mother. “You look like a superhero.”

  Rachel’s smile broadened. “You know what? For a while there, I felt like one, too.”

  Charlotte quickly finished her ice cream then ran off to play, leaving Rachel and Nicholas sitting together on the bench. To an outsider, Nicholas figured they must look like a couple who had come to the playground together with their daughter.

  He liked that idea...quite a lot, actually.

  If she had been any other woman, Nicholas would have kissed her days ago. He would have gone with the flow of his feelings and seen where it led. But with Rachel, he’d held back because he wanted to be certain. And he also wanted to make sure that he didn’t scare her off. Yet, sitting here with her now in the sunlight after a great afternoon together, everything felt just right.

  “Rachel.”

  Nicholas moved a little bit closer, and when she looked at him, he could see anticipation in her eyes. At the same time, though, he thought he also saw a small spark of fear. But that same initial fear on the cliff face hadn’t stopped her from getting all the way to the top, had it?

  “Mommy, look! I can climb just like you!”

  Rachel abruptly pulled back from him to look over at Charlotte, who was clinging to the bars of the climbing frame, swinging a few rungs off the ground. She wasn’t very high yet, but she was doing a passable—and very cute—imitation of her mother’s earlier climbing exploits.

  “Charlotte? What are you doing all the way up there? You've never been that high before.”

  “I’m climbing just like you did!” As if to emphasize her point, Charlotte moved up another rung.

  “Be careful!” Rachel called out as she got up to rush over. And when Nicholas saw Charlotte's foot start to slip slightly and her grip loosen, he moved as quickly as he ever had to lift her off the bars and put her gently down on the ground.