by Toni Mari
I shifted in my seat, wanting to unload my anxiety and have him soothe it. Hardening myself against the urge, I bit out, “Yes and no. Not colic, but dehydrated. I won’t know if I can ride with Robert until the morning.”
He sighed audibly. “Sucks. I was looking forward to seeing you ride.” He lifted his eyebrows suggestively.
I snapped my tongue against the roof of my mouth. “Can you be serious? I told you, I’m not in the mood for jokes.”
He cocked his head. “I’m not joking. I think you look great on a horse, and,” his eyes roamed down my body, and then returned to meet my gaze, “you look great, this morning.”
The flock of butterflies stirred from sleep in my stomach. I crossed my arms over my chest and pulled my eyes away from his. “I look like hell. It’s been a long morning.”
He frowned. “I’m sorry I overslept. I meant to come help you this morning. I suck at mornings.” He leaned forward, peering into my face. “Forgive me?”
I closed my eyes to protect myself from those soulful brown eyes. “There’s nothing to forgive. I didn’t expect you.” I didn’t open my eyes until I heard him sit back. We watched Melinda in silence for a few minutes. Belvedere cantered a half pass again, but this time he was floating across the arena, his feet tapping the ground lightly. Erica’s voice rang out in approval, and Melinda grinned with pride. She gave Belvedere a pat on the neck. My throat began to tighten as I watched her ride improve before my eyes with Erica’s magical instruction, instruction I was never going to get. So I work for a year to master riding the difficult Windsong, and I’m sidelined at the critical hour. Sinking down into the chair, I released a noisy sigh.
Shawn laid a gentle hand on my leg. “Hey, it’s alright. You just missed a lesson. It’s not like it was the finals.” His understanding tone nearly made me crumple. With his finger he began drawing little circles on my knee. “With a little time, I’m sure Windsong will be alright. Meanwhile, at least you’re here with me.” He ran his hand smoothly up my thigh, fingers leaving trails of liquid heat.
My heartbeat sped as I watched his hand’s progression, and then I slammed my palm down, stopping its journey. My frustration turned to irritation. Picking his hand up as if it were a slimy rat, I said in a tight voice, “You wouldn’t understand. Riding with Erica was a chance in a lifetime for me. And now, I might be out of the whole thing.” I ignored his puzzled expression as I stood up and went in search of coffee. In the observation lounge, I fixed a cup and grabbed a Danish. Sinking my teeth into it, I held it there and took a second one. My cell phone chirped, and the vibration tickled my leg.
Cory texted “hows it going?”
“lousy. can i call you?” I sent back.
“in a lesson. call u ltr”
I frowned and collapsed against the couch. I should have gone with him to his new farm, that would have been a great weekend. Now, I missed it for nothing.
“Is there anything I can say to make you feel better?” Shawn perched next to me.
I leaned away, shoving my phone in my pocket. I took a giant bite of pastry and shook my head. “No.”
“Listen, I’m sorry you missed your ride, really.”
I glared.
“I want you on the team. You’re a great rider. But if it doesn’t work out this time, you will do it the next time, I have no doubt.” He took my hand. “Meanwhile, I’m next and I really would like you to keep me company while I get ready.” With a charming half smile, he tugged me up and pulled me with him.
Better than brooding, I suppose. I crammed the rest of the Danish in my mouth and wiggled my arm free. When he turned reaching for me, I pointed to my coffee cup. I walked slowly, both hands on the cup, so the hot liquid wouldn’t spill. He leaned into my shoulder and put an arm around my waist. I gritted my teeth. If I shoved him away, the coffee might spill. When his fingers tickled my side, sending unwelcome shivers through me, I thought it would be worth a little burn to bury my elbow in his ribs.
Alison stepped into the doorway. I froze, but Shawn pushed past her tugging me forward. “’Scuse us, Alison,” he said cheerfully. Her pale blue eyes narrowed on me. Sucking in my stomach, I eased by her, but I couldn’t pry my gaze from her cold, perturbed one. When Shawn’s arm went around my waist again, her perfectly manicured fingers curled into fists. I flinched when she slammed her shoulder into mine and stormed away. I let Shawn propel me along until Alison’s invisible hold over me broke. Shawn was oblivious to her fury, leaning his head on mine and dropping his hand a little lower.
I straightened up abruptly, sloshing coffee on my hand after all. I winced and shook it. “Ouch!” I took a noisy sip, keeping the dripping cup away from my white breeches. “So, what about you and Alison? Did you date? Is she an ex or something?”
“We hooked up a couple times at shows for kicks. We weren’t steady or anything.”
“Well she acts like an ex.”
He looked at me sharply. “What do you mean?”
“Shawn, didn’t you just see that? She was furious that you had your arm around me and were leaving with me. She practically assaulted me.”
He snorted. “Easy, girl. Alison was just a summer fling. She’s just, I don’t know, grumpy, sometimes. We partied together a lot when we were on the team last summer. I doubt she cares much who I’m with.”
“You’re not with me. I’m with Cory, my boyfriend.”
“You may be with Cowboy America now, but you’ll give him up for me. We’ll be great together.”
I stepped back as if he had slapped me and stared at him. Steady, confident brown eyes held mine. His lip lifted in a sexy smile and he took my limp hand. My stomach quivered and my limbs trembled. He was smooth. Part of me wanted him to pull me close and part of me wanted to kick him hard. I extracted my hand, chewing my lip. “No.” I shouldered past him, shaking my head. I looked back, and he was standing there, a knowing smile on his face. He winked. I walked faster.
I strode to Windsong’s stall, rolled the door open, and stepped inside. Pressing my back against the wall, I held a hand over my chest, working to calm my breathing. I didn’t have a lot of experience with guys, only a few goodnight kisses before I met Cory. I loved Cory, I knew I did. No one was better than Cory. Then, why? Why did Shawn make my heart race? Why did his smile make me wonder what it would be like with him.
It wasn’t just that Shawn was good looking. It was his charm and absolute confidence that he would get what he wanted. And it was thrilling to know that he wanted me enough to keep trying. I sighed and pictured Cory’s face, his intense blue eyes, his strong arms. My heart swelled and a smile played on my lips. I could resist Shawn’s charms and when it became difficult, I would just avoid him,
The silence in the stall penetrated my fevered thinking. Where was my fiery, black demon, my partner in crime, my heart? Windsong was laying down again. He swiveled his ears dully toward me but made no move to get up.
Panic seized me, and I dropped to my knees to stroke his cheek. “What’s wrong, buddy?” I whispered. Not much hay left, so he ate most of it. His water bucket was three-quarters empty and clear and clean. Piles of manure lined the back of the stall like normal. The only odd thing was that my crazy, over energized, never-say-die horse was laying down in the middle of the day.
I stepped over and rubbed his flat forehead between his eyes He leaned into it, tipping his head so I could reach his cheeks with both hands. When I stopped and held my hand in front of his nose, he licked me. I stepped back toward the door, and he stretched out his front legs, gave a mighty yawn, pulled himself to his feet, and shook. He came right to me and nudged my hand.
Well, that was normal—he wanted treats. I felt around my pocket and came up with a sorry half of a cookie. No matter, he gobbled it. He took a sip of water, ate a mouthful of hay, and lifted his head to try to see what was going on beyond the stall door.
I refilled his water and watched him through the metal bars. For ten minutes, he calmly munched hay and watch
ed me back. When he didn’t show any signs of discomfort and had talked me out of four more treats, I sagged against the wall. He’s fine. I rubbed my eyes, and then slid to the floor. I was worried about his health and I would never want to do anything to hurt him, but I wanted to be on this team, in this competition. There was a good chance I wouldn’t be able to do it, and that would seriously suck. In fact, it would devastate me. And that silly stuff between me and Shawn was nothing compared to how this animal made me feel, how much I wanted to be on this team. I took a deep shuddering breath, stood up, and headed back into the arena, my concern focused where it should be, on Windsong.
#
Chapter Seventeen
My eyes on Erica, I slid into the seat next to my parents.
Mom leaned over, dipping her chin toward Erica. “Is that the Olympic rider? She does look familiar.”
I nodded.
“It is a shame that you couldn’t ride with her today.” She patted my knee.
Erica was Shawn’s full-time trainer. I sat back with arms crossed, wishing I had that easy relationship with her. It didn’t seem fair that I missed my lesson and he had one despite the fact that he rode with her all the time. Practicing under her instruction once or twice per week meant he was familiar with her favorite figures and exercises and executed them with barely any explanation. They laughed together when Donner kicked out every time Shawn touched his flank with the whip.
“He thinks he knows best, Shawn. I can’t tell who’s more cocky and confident, you or him,” Erica teased.
Shawn tugged Donner’s mane and scratched his cheek when the horse turned to look at his rider. “He thinks he can intimidate me, but he knows I’m king.” Donner pushed Shawn’s hand away and swung sideways, breaking into a rough canter. With no visible effort, Shawn stopped him and put him back on the exact track he was on before that little display of temper.
They began another exercise. The connection and synchronicity between the two were obvious and thrilling. It was almost as if they were trying to one-up each other, and the brilliant movements that came out of that competition were enthralling to watch. I tore my eyes away from the inspiring picture to look at the others who were observing. There wasn’t a sound, and all eyes were riveted on the pair working in the center of the ring. Good to know I wasn’t the only one impressed by Shawn and Donner. Even Alison was watching closely, a small, delighted smile on her face.
Shawn had every right to be cocky and confident in the saddle. He was going to be someone in dressage, you could just tell. I found his rapport with Donner so attractive. Could a man be bad if he could connect so well with a horse?
Shawn was the last rider before lunch. Everyone stood up, talking excitedly as they meandered to the observation lounge for a catered meal.
“That kid is awfully good,” Mom commented.
“Not as good as my princess,” Dad replied loyally with his arm around my shoulders.
“Thanks, Dad.” I kissed his cheek.
“Let’s go get in line before we head back to the hotel, Mary.” He rubbed his stomach, helping Mom through the rows of chairs.
“I’ll meet you in there.” I felt I should say something to Shawn. The way his riding made me feel, it went beyond his meaningless pursuit of me. He needed to know that it was important, his riding, and how moving it was. I needed to tell him how he touched people, and to be serious about it.
Alison stood next to Donner, her hand on Shawn’s knee. He was leaning down listening to what she was saying. He held the reins in one hand and laid the other over hers. She reached up and pulled him down for a kiss.
I stopped. Right, I was supposed to be avoiding him. I turned quickly, slamming my knee into the hard metal folding chair and nearly toppling over. “Ouch.” I steadied myself by grabbing the chair back.
“You okay?” His voice should not have been that close. My foot tangled in the chair leg, and I sat with a plop. Couldn’t I just walk out with a little dignity, for once?
He had ridden Donner right up to the first row of chairs. Alison was heading through the door into the barn, but she looked back over her shoulder at the sound of Shawn’s voice. I couldn’t miss the hate on her face.
“Jane, you okay?” he repeated.
“Oh, yeah. Umm . . . nice ride.” I stood, peering up at his expression. Those flirty brown eyes stalled the praise in my throat. I blew out a sigh and ran my hand over Donner’s smooth, powerful neck. “He’s amazing.” Donner’s delicate looks belied the strength and power in his movements; he was an exquisite athlete. He turned his glossy copper head and confidently nosed my hand. What would it be like to work with an animal who wasn’t jumping out of his skin every two steps?
“Thanks. Want to cool him out?”
My head snapped up. “You mean get on him?”
“Sure.”
I grinned, then immediately bit my lip. How disloyal was I, to want to ride this incredible horse when my poor guy was ill and needing me? Bouncing between desire to feel what it was like to ride Donner and staying true to Windsong, I chewed my lip without answering.
“C’mon, just for a minute. Don’t you want to see what another horse feels like?”
I gave in to my curiosity. Even though you drove a Jaguar, when someone offered you a ride in a Ferrari, you took it. I gave a brisk nod. “Yeah!”
He started Donner over to the mounting block.
“But my helmet is all the way back in the barn. Can I just use yours?”
“Sure.” He unbuckled his helmet and handed it down to me.
I stood to the side, adjusting the hard hat on my head, waiting for him to dismount. He stopped Donner right next to the mounting block and said, “Come on.”
I looked at him dumbly. “Aren’t you going to get off him first?”
“Nah, I’ll help you up from here.”
I rolled my eyes. “Forget it.” Always the games with him.
“Okay, okay. I’ll jump off after you get on. Come on.”
I hesitated, not believing him. Donner turned to look at me too. What the hell? I wanted to get on this horse, so I climbed aboard. As expected, Shawn did not dismount. He wrapped his arms around my waist and moved Donner off at the walk.
“I knew you wouldn’t get off. ”
He tightened his arms around me. “Jane, just once around. I want to keep you safe.” He nuzzled my neck, pressing closer.
Donner moseyed along like a trail horse, the weight of two riders not fazing him at all. The swaying gait forced my body to rock against Shawn’s, encouraging the contact I had thought about earlier. When Cory and I rode together, it was all I could do to keep myself from jumping him, that’s how cozy it felt. Shawn’s chin snuggled into my shoulder. “Hmmm.” His warm breath tickled my skin.
I sat up abruptly and pushed his arms off me. “Why do you act like this?”
“Like what?”
Donner’s rolling gait kept throwing me against Shawn’s lean, rock-hard chest. I grabbed the reins and stopped the horse. “Like a pushy jerk.”
“I’m not pushy. I like you. What’s wrong with that?”
“I already told you, I have a boyfriend.”
“But he’s not here, I am.” He slid his arms around me again.
“You know, you are a fantastic rider. I watch you with Donner, and I wonder how someone can be so in tune with his horse. He must be an amazing person to reach such a level of connection. ‘This guy is going to be one of the greats, and I am thankful I get to see him ride,’ I think to myself.” I paused. “Then you open your mouth.”
Shawn stiffened and jerked his arms back. I threw my leg forward over the horse’s neck and leapt down. I turned to look up at Shawn, but he wouldn’t look at me, his jaw set and his eyes flinty.
“Thanks for the ride.” I marched out.
#
Chapter Eighteen
Alison rode after lunch. Her horse’s name, Kiss of Moonlight, fit well. The mare was silver and slender and shimmered around the
arena, like the Sugar Plum Fairy in The Nutcracker. Alison rode with precision, but with no emotion. She was not happy if a movement went well, and she was not upset if it didn’t. The mare was an incredible mover and worked obediently, although she often pinned her ears and twitched her tail with annoyance. They were a beautiful pair, but they did not inspire joy in my heart. In fact, I wanted to stop them, give the horse a treat, and rub her neck soothingly. I wondered whether the mare would accept a treat, whether Alison had ever even offered one. They both seemed awfully detached and sophisticated.
Shawn’s helmet was on the chair next to me because I planned to give it back when he came in. I wanted to apologize too. He was just flirting, and maybe I shouldn’t have been so mean. It wasn’t his fault I was angry at myself for being so affected by him. He didn’t show up throughout Alison’s ride.
My phone rang. Cory. I swiped at the screen. “Hi.” I rose and went outside so I wouldn’t disturb anyone.
“How did it go?”
I slid down onto a stone retaining wall that lined the landscaping around the arena. “It didn’t.” I filled him in, not bothering to hide my disappointment.
“At least he isn’t colicking.”
“But it may be worse,” I moaned, giving him the details of the vet exam. “So, I don’t know if I’ll be able to ride tomorrow at all.”
The sound of a noisy sigh whistled through the phone. “Wow, I’m sorry. You sound like you need a hug. I wish I was there to give you one.”
I laid my forehead on my knees. “It’s okay. Everyone here is being really nice and supportive.”
Cory snorted, “I’m sure the witches are happy you aren’t riding.”
“Alison is ecstatic. She has it in for me—she thinks I’m stealing Shawn away from her or something.”
Cory’s voice sharpened. “Why is she thinking that?”
I slapped my forehead. Think before you talk, Jane. “Just that he sat with me during the meeting and stuff.”
“He’s not hitting on you, is he?” Cory’s voice rose.
