Lust and Lies (The Jamie Reynolds Chronicles #1)

by Casandra Charles

  “Okay, let me go and find a place to park. See you soon. I’m so glad to be home,” Toni said.

  As the phone went dead, there went my nerves again. “Glad to be home?” I nervously repeated to myself. “I can do this, I can do this, I have been talking and texting with Toni for months and I do love him. This is a good thing,” I kept telling myself over and over again.

  My home was on a corner and I kept looking out of the window, hoping to pinpoint exactly when Toni was coming to the door. I finally saw him and he came walking up with one small duffle bag. “I guess I should go and help him with his bags because it’s really not safe to leave your items visible in a car on the streets.”

  I looked in the mirror, and as tears began to run down my cheeks, I smiled at myself and embraced this new relationship. I had prayed for guidance and a clear direction for my life and maybe this was what God had planned for me. These were my last thoughts before I heard Toni walking up the stairs.

  I quickly wiped my tears away and opened the door. The rest was all a blur as I embraced my love and invited him in. I did remember asking him if he needed help with the rest of his bags, and he said, “This is all I have.” I was lost because it was a very small duffle bag. I believed he said he gave the rest of his clothes to Jonathan, which I found very strange because Jonathan was five eleven and at most 150 when wet, and Toni was a little stockier at five seven and 180 lbs. So I didn’t think Jonathan could fit into Toni’s clothes, but I planned on calling Jonathan back to catch up because he’d called at least two to three times and I kept telling him I would call him back.

  Toni and I spent an hour of our first official night together talking and chatting. I gave him a tour of my simple three-bedroom home and he seemed pleased. It was after midnight and we went to bed. I could imagine how tired Toni was after the drive.

  Round Two Was Much More Enjoyable…

  My natural body clock woke me up at 7:30 a.m. and I eased out of bed to check my phone while Toni slept. I know he was tired, so I didn’t want to bother him. I figured this was a good time to call Jonathan, at least to let him know Toni made it safely to my home.

  “Hey, J, sorry for the delay in my call. What’s up?”

  “Nothing, man, did Tone make it safely to you?”

  “Yeah, he got in after eleven p.m. last night.”

  “Have him call me ASAP,” Jonathan demanded.

  “Oh, okay, he’s sleeping, but I’ll have him call you. Is everything okay?” I asked.

  “Not really.” Then Jonathan gave me an earful. “Man, JR, this man just up and left Atlanta. He told me he was thinking of moving in with you, and I was trying to call you because I found out he lost his job last week and was looking for another job, but then he said he was considering moving in with you.”

  “Wait, what? He lost his job? He told me he quit his job like three days ago.”

  “Naw, man, he lost his job because they said he wasn’t productive. I think he lost his job because he was always on the phone and stuff. He did that security monitoring thing, so he should be monitoring security not texting or calling everyone. I found out he wasn’t even supposed to be on his phone at all at work. He just got that job six months ago and was on probation and shit.”

  “Wait, how do you know all of this?”

  “My cousin Billy works with him; he was the one who got him the job trying to look out. I told Toni not to mess this up because my cousin put his name as a referral and I didn’t want my cousin to look bad if something goes down. Anyway, my cousin just gave me an earful when Tone got fired. I was clueless up until that point. Not to mention, he was supposed to pay this month’s rent before he left since he promised to pay, and when I got up this morning, that nigga was gone and he left his room in a mess with shit, there was clothes and crap everywhere.”

  “Oh no, I am so sorry, Jonathan. I knew nothing about this.”

  “I figured,” Jonathan said. “Well, he’s your problem now.”

  “Wait, what did you say?” I asked.

  “Man, never mind, anyway, Tawana is happy he moved out because she wants to move in and she never really liked him. She says he’s an asshole.” He started to laugh.

  “Come on, Jonathan, be serious. Toni is sleeping, but I’m a little lost on everything. I’ll have him call you, and I hope this was just an oversight.”

  “Yeah, an oversight,” Jonathan repeated with sarcasm in his voice.

  I was starting to get upset, but was I more upset with Jonathan or Antonio? “Okay, Jonathan, thanks for the update. I’ll tell Toni to hit you up.”

  As I hung up the phone, all kinds of thoughts went running through my head. First, Toni said he quit, then he told me he gave Jonathan most of his clothes (which I guess leaving clothes in his home must mean he gave them to him), and now he skipped out on paying Jonathan rent like he promised. Should I say something to Toni when he woke up? Naturally I would tell him I spoke to Jonathan and he needed to call him. Maybe he would come clean on everything.

  Moments later, I heard Toni walking down the stairs.

  “Hey, babe,” he called.

  “I’m in the kitchen,” I yelled back.

  He came towards me and gave me a big kiss and said good morning.

  “Hey, Mr. No-brush-your-teeth, good morning,” I jokingly said.

  “I haven’t had breakfast yet, so I don’t brush my teeth until I eat,” he said.

  “Really?” I said with a confused look on my face.

  “It’s cool. What’s for breakfast?”

  “I just had some cereal.”

  “You ate already?” he asked.

  “Yes,” I replied. “I try to eat as soon as I get up, after I brush my teeth, of course,” I said with a smirk on my face. “Besides, it’s almost nine a.m. and I usually can’t wait to break the fast. Breakfast is the most important meal of the day and I can’t survive without it first thing in the morning. Hey, I spoke to Jonathan this morning, and we caught up since he has been calling me for a minute now.”

  “Oh really? What’s up with him?”

  I didn’t want to be in his business so instead of saying you tell me, I just said, “He asked for you to call him because he wanted to talk?” and I left it like that.

  The day went on and I noticed Toni never called Jonathan; he never even called anyone. He was excited to be in New Jersey as we drove around the city and did some sightseeing. I still had Jonathan’s words in the back of my head, but I didn’t say anything. We stopped at my favorite soul food restaurant in Jersey and just talked. I asked Toni what his plan was, figuring he would say he would start job hunting right away.

  But he said, “Man, I figure I would check out New York and see what’s up. I only have, like, a few hundred on me.”

  “A few hundred what?” I repeated.

  “I only have like a few hundred dollars left on me until I find a job. You know I had to pay Jonathan rent and my half of the bills before I left.”

  Wait, did he just lie to me right to my face with a straight face? I started to freak out and excused myself from the table. My thoughts got the best of me as I ran into the stall and began to cry. My mortgage alone is $1100 a month, not including utilities. After a few minutes I got myself together and made it back to the table. I can do this, I thought, trying to psych myself up.

  “Okay, so only a few hundred, so what is your plan on work?” I kindly asked.

  “I need to update my résumé and figure I can use those online job searches to help me with my search, but let’s not talk about this over lunch. We’ll figure it out in due time.”

  I just said okay and Toni reached for the bill to cover the check. I insisted on paying it since I knew he only had a few hundred to his name.

  We enjoyed the rest of the day and I just relaxed and didn’t think of anything else since the damage was done and it would all be fine—Toni kept on repeating that to me throughout the day every time I asked about a plan. I was a natural planner, so naturally having a
game plan was second nature to me since I didn’t usually wing anything.

  After a full day of sightseeing in New Jersey and really enjoying our time together, we finally made it home and I offered to cook dinner. I took out some chicken and was planning on cooking baked chicken, mashed potatoes and veggie. This was my dinner of choice, so I figured Toni shouldn’t have a problem with it since he often asked me what I was eating for dinner via phone and my reply was often the same (baked chicken, mashed potatoes and veggie).

  Just like lunch, dinner went great. We laughed, talked and just enjoyed our time together. I felt at ease and believed this would all work out. We started kissing and then this led to touching, which was a first for us. Toni was so nice and gentle and kept asking me if I was ready. Despite what Jonathan told me and what was in my mind, I went with my heart and made love for the first time with Toni.

  I know both Toni and I were nervous, but what started downstairs in front of the TV made its way upstairs. Our passion was strong and felt so good. He kissed every part of my body and had my body wanting him more and more. I was ready and asked Toni to keep on going as he made his way down and began giving me oral sex; this drove my body crazy. My body was shaking and I wanted him inside of me and this was just what he did. But it lasted all of two minutes. I was shocked and disappointed because he spoke for months about how his sex drive was higher than mine and he knew he was a great lover. I figured since it was our first time and our passion might have gotten the best of him, I excused the shortness for the moment and figured it would be better the next time. Needless to say, we cuddled for about ten minutes; then I got out of bed and went to the bathroom to clean up. I also went downstairs to make sure everything was locked up.

  Moments later, I made my way back to bed, but Toni looked like he was ready for round two. I was down for this since I figured he might want to make up for the short cumming about twenty minutes ago.

  I had a robe on, so Toni just pulled off the robe and walked me back to bed. He again kissed me all over and made his way back down between my legs. He was pretty good at oral sex as my body moved to the rhythm of his tongue. He also must have found my happy drawer and pulled out my neon pink dildo. I thought he would be mad, but he wasn’t. He asked me to use it on myself and he masturbated to me masturbating. This was a totally different experience for me, but I enjoyed it. I had never used my dildo so openly in front of any guy. I had only used it in private when I needed to.

  Needless to say, round two was much more enjoyable, maybe because I pleasured myself; then Toni joined me and replaced my dildo with his penis and we made love. When he was ready to cum, he pulled out and inserted my dildo and this continued for almost an hour. I was in love. However, I only felt the most pleasure with the dildo instead of his penis, but this was because my dildo vibrated and was at least a quarter inch thicker and at least two inches longer than his penis. I wished I was able to enjoy his manhood without the help of my dildo, but in the end, we both got what we wanted from the experience. I never had a full orgasm, but the intense moments were just as good.

  We cuddled and then I got up and cleaned up, and he asked, “Why do you always get up?”

  I shrugged my shoulders and said, “I don’t know. I just do.”

  He then got up with me and joined me in the bathroom.

  We both laughed as we helped each other clean up and then both went back to bed to enjoy a good night’s sleep. Our time together was cut short because I got called into work and had to be in at 7:30 a.m., so we just held each other and went to sleep.

  The next morning, I followed my regular schedule and quickly got myself together, and when I was on my way downstairs, Toni asked me where I was going. I figured he was still half asleep and told him to go back to bed, as I was just going to work but would call him later.

  I made it to work and had a satisfied smile on my face the whole time. My babe was home in my home. I was sexually satisfied and was feeling pretty good about this relationship.

  $150 Only Lasted a Week…

  “Hey, baby, I’m at work and I may be home a little later than usual since this is our last week of shooting.”

  “Good, I can’t wait until this movie is over and you can finally sleep in with me,” Toni said, as he lay in bed at 9:30 a.m.

  “Well, once this gig is over, I’ll need to find the next one. We got bills to pay,” I said in a strong tone.

  “I know, babe, and I understand. I hope I find something soon so you don’t have to work so hard.”

  “Well, I’ll still probably work the same when you finally find a job. Two solid incomes will be great. Besides, we can start a savings since my savings is almost tapped.”

  “I made a few calls, as some friends owe me some money, and I’m hoping they pay me back soon.”

  This was not what I needed to hear; I needed to hear him go after finding a job and doing something with his day instead of driving around New Jersey and New York sightseeing and calling me when he sees something cool.

  “Babe, I got to go.”

  “Alright, babe, have a great day, love you.”

  “Love you too.”

  I hung up the phone and didn’t really know how to feel. Toni had been at the house for over a month and still no work. He ran through the money he came down with in, like, a week. He only had around $300, but I ended up finding out he used over $150 on gas and food on his drive from Atlanta to New Jersey. So $150 only lasted a week after he got to town as he tried to get settled, which really turned out to be sightseeing with the last $100 he had to his name. He had no credit or checking account, which I later learned over the last month. He said he didn’t like the government in his business, so he liked to keep his money the old-fashioned way in a mattress. I never had the best upbringing when it came to money, but I learned and taught myself to be responsible with credit and used it to my advantage, not like Toni, who saw it as a crutch.

  After a long day at work, I managed to get home at 10:30 p.m. Toni had dinner made, but I sadly declined because I didn’t like eating that late. Besides, they gave us dinner at work, so I was still pretty full. I made my way upstairs to shower and get ready for bed as I opened the mail while walking upstairs and saw a Comcast bill that was almost triple the normal amount. I was confused since I was never really home and didn’t really watch TV, so I assumed it was the Internet usage, maybe from Toni looking for work, but then I realized I had unlimited Internet, so I checked the phone bill and saw no additional calls. Then I turned the page to the back of the cable bill and saw a bunch of charges for a ton of X-rated movies. I figured this must be a mistake, so I said nothing about it and planned on calling Comcast the next day.

  Toni made his way upstairs to check on me. I told him I was about to jump in the shower but got held up looking at this Comcast bill, as it was almost three times more than usual. I was interested in what Toni would say.

  “I’m so sorry, babe, I will totally pay the bill,” Toni said.

  “Wait, you watched over ten X-rated shows in like two weeks?” I said in confusion. “That’s like one show every day Monday to Friday for two weeks.” I was pissed. “Babe, it’s ten dollars per movie,” I said, trying to calm down.

  “I know, man, I get bored and I have a problem.”

  “What problem?” I asked.

  “I have an addiction to porn and got tempted to watch and couldn’t stop.”

  I snapped and just went off. “What are you talking about? What addiction? You never said anything about this before. You don’t even have a job to pay the bill. What is really going on?”

  This began our first fight.

  “I said I would pay the bill.”

  “How?” I yelled. “You have no job. I’m the one who has to pay this bill. I work hard as hell and you just stay at home and watch pornos all day or go sightseeing and burn gas instead of looking for a job.”

  “Oh, oh, finally you say something. I’ve been waiting for you to say something. I have been tr
ying to find a job, and the bullshit jobs I get ain’t worth my time. It’s hard to find a job here.”

  “Well, you need to be qualified for something in order to get a job. You had a call center type job with no college education back in Atlanta, so what do you think you will get in New Jersey?” I blurted out, and as good as it felt, I felt so bad to say it. I knew Toni didn’t finish college and I knew he was working a basic job and had no career when I met him, but I tried to look past all of that and not judge him like I was better than him because I had a career, a college degree and credit.

  I clearly hit a nerve as Toni yelled back at me, “So you think you’re better than me? You work all the time and have no life after your career. Wow, what a life.”

  “I have been up front about who I am, and you knew I worked a lot, big deal. Don’t act surprised because I work. Besides, I need to work to take care of o-u-r daily living,” I interrupted him. I knew this fight was going nowhere, so I walked away and went into the bathroom. I jumped into the shower and just stood under the water and I began to cry. I was so lost and confused. He was like a different guy and I felt so torn on what to do. He’d been here for over a month and I never once saw him pray, yet when we were apart, he said he “prayed for me every night.” I was starting to believe all that Jonathan had once said about him, despite what I thought about him over our long-distance relationship. He lost his job in Atlanta, but he didn’t think I knew this. “What can I do?” I said out loud as I cried in the shower.

  When I got out of the shower, I figured I just needed to confront this issue and see where it went. When I got out, I was ready for battle, but Toni had candles lit all over the room and apologized over and over again and promised to do better. He unwrapped my robe and walked me over to the bed. We naturally made love under the candles, and of course, my dildo was again involved in our lovemaking, but at this point I was so used to it because Toni used it every time on me with or without him involved. It felt so good and, honestly, I really needed it to even get off now. He kissed my body all over and then fingered me as he kissed my nipples and then he stroked his penis with his other hand, and then I had a vision of him masturbating to a ten-dollar porno and I began to laugh. I tried to play it off by faking a sexual moan as he moved the vibration of the dildo in and out of my vagina. I was slowly losing respect for Toni’s manhood since it wasn’t pulling its weight around the bedroom, and Toni wasn’t pulling his weight around the house. After fifteen minutes of him apologizing during our lovemaking, it was over, and like clockwork, I got up and cleaned up in the bathroom. And then we went to bed.