Kneel For Me
Page 5
I raised an eyebrow at her, but didn’t stop drinking my tea. I was well aware of the headline. It’d been the one I’d devised with the press department when I’d returned yesterday.
“I’m not sure what it has to do with you,” I answered.
“Nothing to do with me?” she demanded. “How is it nothing to do with me?”
“My private life is nothing to do with anyone but myself. Or maybe Prince Albert.”
Speaking of the devil, the man himself walked in and dropped a tender kiss on my forehead. It was hard to think that our outing had only been yesterday.
“Your private life is still your own,” he said, taking a seat and pouring himself some coffee.
“What is wrong with you?” Margaret hissed.
“I’m not too sure what you mean, cousin,” I replied.
She made a frustrated grunt before storming out of the room.
“Was that really necessary?” Albert asked.
“Potentially not, but she’s almost always trying to stir up trouble, so anything that keeps her out of the same room as me is good in my book.”
He leaned across the table and gave my hand a squeeze. “I’d have thought having her in the same room as you would be good for damage control.”
I sighed. “I know. It’s why I invited her to the palace in the first place. I just can't stand being around her."
“Are you still okay with this?”
“Yes,” I responded instantly, grateful for the change in conversation. “I am if you are…” I trailed off, hoping to gauge from his reaction.
“I’ll admit to being a little nervous to meet the man who shares your affection.”
“Why?” My brows furrowed as I tried to work it out.
“He must have something I don’t.” Albert shrugged and took a sip of his coffee.
“And you have things he doesn’t either,” I replied instantly. “It’s not a competition to discern which of you is better.” The words slipped out before I fully thought them through and a knowing look crossed his face.
“You don’t really expect to ever choose between us, do you?” he asked.
“I hope not to,” I replied quietly.
“Why?”
His demeanor was interesting. I couldn’t quite understand it if I was honest. He seemed more curious than anything else, which just didn’t quite match up. If he wanted me, then why was he so willing to do this?
“Why do I hope not to have to choose?”
Albert nodded.
“I don’t know,” I answered honestly. “But every time I try and imagine the situation in my head, it just...well, it’s what I want to do.”
“You want a harem then?” A smirk lingered on his lips, and though he seemed to be toying with me a little bit, I could sense the genuine question.
“I don’t think two counts as a harem,” I countered.
“Then we’ll find you a third man, three should about do it.”
I choked on my tea, spluttering out liquid that made me very glad Albert had decided he already liked me.
“Why are you okay with this?” I blurted out. I mean, I knew why I was okay with the situation. I wanted them both. But as far as I could tell, Albert actually got nothing out of it. Neither did Carter really.
“Maybe odd coloured socks isn’t the only secret I keep.”
My eyes widened as I grasped for words I wasn’t sure would come.
“I’ll let you think about that one,” Albert said while rising to his feet.
I opened my mouth to speak, but no words came out. Albert smiled and kissed my forehead again, leaving me to the rest of my breakfast.
And my confusion.
Chapter Thirteen
I paced back and forth, Albert’s words still echoing in my head as what was about to happen sunk in.
I’d invited a prince to my bedroom. At night. When no one else was going to be there.
Except that wasn’t true. Someone else would be there.
At least Carter and Albert knew they were going to meet. I would bet almost everything I owned that some royal love interests had run into one another by accident before. The chances of every one of my ancestors being well behaved was very slim. Especially given some of them had multiple marriages. One even petitioned the Pope to try and get him to agree to two marriages.
Maybe that idea wasn’t so bad after all…
No, Amara, don’t go there.
It wouldn’t end well for me in the eyes of the world if it did. I’d be the Queen who single handedly caused the biggest scandal in history. Even bigger than any beheading, affair or religious reformation.
So, best not go asking about polygamous marriage quite yet.
I jumped slightly as a knock sounded on my door and I smoothed out my suit skirt. I’d considered dressing a little sexier, but there wasn’t a dress code that covered the two men I wanted to sleep with meeting for the first time, so I’d given up and just worn what I had been for my meeting earlier.
I rushed to the door, before remembering who I was and slowing myself so my heart wasn’t racing nearly so much.
My palm itched as I reached out and took the doorknob in my hand, twisting and pulling it open to reveal Albert stood behind.
“Hi,” I whispered.
“Hi.” He sounded as nervous as I did, which was a good start.
Albert rubbed a hand around the base of his neck, disturbing his already ruffled looking shirt. He definitely looked like a prince still, but one who had a bad reputation and all the women were warned to stay away from.
He stepped into the room and some of his nervousness vanished. With one swift movement, he drew me into his arms and pressed his lips against mine.
Heat seared through me and I pushed myself into him, curving my body against his harder muscles.
A small part of me wished Carter wasn’t coming this evening and that I could spend it with Albert instead. In fact, I hadn’t really thought that bit through at all. How was I going to ask one of them to leave? Or did I just have to suck it up and spend tonight alone?
“Ah hem.”
I leaped back from Albert and stumbled on my heels. Stupid shoes. Why hadn’t I taken them off already?
“You must be Prince Albert, it’s a pleasure to meet you, Your Highness,” Carter greeted, pretty much ignoring me.
Albert steadied me with one hand while holding his other out to the other man.
“I don’t believe it’ll be necessary for us to use formalities,” Albert replied.
“Glad to hear that, they don’t trip off the tongue very easily.”
“So you’ll make me work for just calling you Albert, but with Carter, it’s fine straight away?” I squeaked.
Albert smirked. “I’m not trying to woo Carter.”
"And you think the way to woo me is to insist on all the formalities?" I muttered. I wasn't even sure where he got that idea from but it was one to...
Both of the men started to laugh.
"What?" I demanded, my gaze flicking between them.
"I hate to point this out, but he is standing in your bedroom at night," Carter said through his laughter.
"I'd say it worked perfectly."
From the looks on their faces, I'd have thought they were seconds away from giving one another a high five. I hoped they knew better than to act on that.
"Cat got your tongue?" Carter teased, showing just how well he knew me.
“Sorry, I wasn’t aware I needed to respond to that one.”
“Has anyone told you two that you bicker like siblings?” Albert laughed.
Horror flowed through me. Like siblings? I certainly hoped we didn’t come across like that.
“I don’t know what your brothers do with your sisters back in Belgium, but we don’t do that with ours here.”
My horror was mirrored on Albert’s face. “I’m so sorry, that’s not what I meant…”
“It’s fine,” I replied hastily. “This was never going to be smoot
h sailing.” In fact, I was going to take the fact they weren’t ripping into one another as a good sign.
"I don't know what you mean," Carter responded. "I meet my other lovers' partners all the time." My mouth fell open as my brain processed what he was saying.
"Your other lovers?" My voice was harder and colder than I'd intended, but I was pretty sure it got my point across.
Albert snickered in a very un-prince like fashion, but I chose to ignore him.
"That's not what I meant..."
"Isn't it?" I raised an eyebrow.
"So, let me get this straight," Albert interrupted. "You're allowed to have both of us, but we're not allowed to have anyone else?"
"Yes," I responded instantly, before realising what I was saying. "No. Yes. I don't know."
"We need to know your answer, Amara," Carter prompted, though he didn't seem all that serious about it.
"I don't have one." I collapsed onto one of the lounge chairs which dotted my receiving room and tried not to look at either of them. What did I want from them? I didn't want to choose between them, of that I was certain. But I also didn't want them to be off with other women. Or other men for that matter. I didn't know what interests either of them had in that department. I hadn't even slept with Albert myself yet.
"Okay. So let's set some ground rules," Albert suggested, sitting beside me and taking my hands in his.
"I don't have any of those either." I really should have prepared more. It wasn't like me to act so clueless. Before I opened parliament for the first time, I insisted on practicing for five days to get it right. Including saying the lines over and over as I did just about everything. The same happened when I had to give a speech. But this...an arguably important development in my personal life, and I was stumped.
"How about we try for some rules then?" Carter suggested, sitting on my other side.
I didn't want to admit out loud how much I liked the two of them sitting either side of me. I'd save that thought for later when we had less serious things to discuss.
I nodded instead of answering.
"I think it's safe to say I remain a secret from the world," Carter started. "Which means from the world's point of view, the only person you're involved with romantically is Albert."
"What? No!" I protested instantly.
"There isn't really a choice on that one," Carter pointed out. "Even if I was the only man in your life, do you really think they'd be happy with you seeing an accountant?"
"It could be worse?" I tried. "You could be a circus performer."
He laughed softly, as did Albert.
"True, but I am still the gardener's son. If we were together in public, just think of all the stories that would come to light."
I stared in front of me, not wanting to admit the truth in his words aloud for fear of having to accept them.
"What did the two of you get up to in your youth?" Albert asked, amusement playing in his voice.
"This one time, Amara was feeling particularly adventurous and came to find me in the rose garden, and-"
"Enough. He doesn't want to hear that story," I cut in hastily. It was a good job the lights were dim and they couldn't see the blush which was now no doubt staining my cheeks. That day had been fun, but I didn't need to be reliving it.
"I do want to hear that story," Albert protested.
"She was a very naughty princess," Carter offered.
"I'm even worse as a Queen," I muttered.
"So the two of you were together before?" Albert asked.
"I wouldn't say together," Carter protested.
"Yes." I answered at the same time. "Or as together as a princess can be with anyone."
"How old were you?"
"Seventeen. Why?"
"Just trying to work out if it's appropriate for me to fantasise about." he shrugged. "But if you were that young, then I guess not."
"She was eighteen for some of it too, that's perfectly acceptable."
"Ah, so it is. Care to paint a better picture for me?"
"Stop!" I cried, jumping to my feet. "What is going on here? Why are you even thinking about Carter and I having sex?"
"Are you okay, Amara?" Carter asked.
"Yes, I'm fine, just a little confused." But even I could hear the agitation in my voice. I didn't like not being in control, and that was definitely the way the two of them were making me feel right now.
"My socks aren't the only secret I keep," Albert said cryptically.
"Yes, I know, you implied as much at breakfast."
He rose to his feet and pulled me into his arms, his touch surprisingly tender given the circumstances.
"There's a lot of things I've always wanted to do, but never been able to because it's not the kind of thing a prince should. I'm joking a little, but when you mentioned not wanting to choose between the two of us, it opened the doors up a little for me to fulfill some of that."
I frowned, but didn't step away from him. I just needed to process things a little.
"What kind of things?" I asked, drawing out my words as I hesitated over whether I should even say them.
What he was saying was true. As royals, we didn't have the ability to experiment as much with the things we wanted to do. Every person we were intimate with, or even just good friends with, was another person who could turn on us in time and reveal our secrets to the world. None of us wanted that. But this...well, this did open doors. Ones I should have left firmly locked but my own greed said otherwise.
“It's hard to say, exactly. It's been a long time since I've allowed myself to think about them too much. But watching a woman with another man is certainly right up there."
I swallowed hard, not wanting to admit just how much that idea turned me on. If he was into that, and Carter was willing…
"I...I don't think it's up to me," I stuttered.
Albert chuckled. "So that's a yes from you." His gaze strayed back to Carter who was still sitting alone, but able to hear the conversation.
"If it means I still get to spend time with Amara, and it'll make her happy, then I'll do anything."
"No," I said firmly. "That's not how this works. And this is one of my ground rules. If any of us isn't happy with something, then we don't do it." My eyes flicked between the two of them, searching for understanding I truly hoped was there. I needed them to agree to that. I needed them to be on board with what our relationship was and accept there were still boundaries.
"Okay, I'll need to think about it," Carter admitted. "It's not something I've ever thought about before, and I need to decide exactly what I want."
"But you're still going to..." I couldn't finish my sentence. I couldn't ask him if he was still going to come to my bed. This whole meeting had been a risk, and so far it wasn't going too badly. Or it wasn't for a conversation between myself, the man who took my virginity and a man I was yet to actually have sex with. I should really change that last part.
"Yes." He rose to his feet and I untangled myself from Albert so I could meet him in the middle.
"I don't want to lose you, Carter," I said, looking deep into his eyes. "But I don't want to give up Albert either."
"That's okay." He drew a finger down my cheek. "I always knew you were never going to be mine. But this...this gives me some hope. If I can have a part of your heart, even if I have to share it, then it's worth it."
An involuntary tear slid down my cheek, though I wasn't too sure why. "You've always had a part of my heart," I responded.
"Good. You've always had all of mine. And this means you can keep it." He leaned in and brushed his lips against mine once. A quick touch that still managed to linger longer. Much like Carter himself. He'd been away for years and yet here I was still yearning after him.
"I love you," I whispered. "Lord how I've tried not to."
"I love you too," Carter responded. "I always have and always will."
He pressed his lips against mine again, this kiss lasting slightly longer. But it wasn't o
ne of his bedroom kisses. Or one of the ones that consistently made me weak at the knees and begging for more of them.
"I'll leave you to it," he whispered, his breath fanning against my lips as we parted.
"You don't have to go," I countered.
"I do, and you know it. Have a good evening, Amara." He stepped away, his hand not letting go of mine until the very last moment.
"Albert." He nodded to my prince before turning and disappearing back to where he'd snuck into my rooms.
We both watched him leave in silence, neither of us fully knowing what to say next.
"So..."
"So, that was Carter," I responded.
"How long have you been with him?" Albert asked, retaking his seat.
"A couple of years when we were teenagers and a couple of weeks since he returned to court.
We've known each other for as long as I can remember though," I answered honestly. There was no point in concealing any truths at this point. It would only lead to more hurt in the end.
"Are you okay with all of this?" he asked me. "Like, really okay? I know you don't think you want to choose, but you still can if you want to."
I closed the gap between us and took his hands in mine, crouching down so I was perched between his legs. What I wouldn't give for us to be the other way around right now.
"I'm more than fine with it, Albert. More fine than I've been in years."
He cupped my cheek in his hand, pulling my face to his so he could kiss me. I responded instantly, fire igniting within me. If this was anything to go by, tonight would be a turning point for us in more than one way.
Chapter Fourteen
Clothing ripped as we made our way to my bedroom. Thrown all over the place in a way which would have driven me mad if my brain could have processed anything other than the feel of Albert's skin against mine and the heat of him against me.
Neither of us were giving any quarter as we tumbled into the bed, the soft down giving way beneath us.
I gasped as one of Albert's fingers grazed past my nipple, wanting him to carry on further down, and pay it more attention, all at the same time.
I tangled one of my hands in his hair, pulling his head closer so I could deepen our kiss by nibbling on his bottom lip.