Within the Realm (The Gifted Realm Book 1)

by Jillian Neal

  “Please, Rainer, you have to.”

  “Em,” he swallowed hard, “this is gonna hurt, baby.” He tried to prepare her in a choked, desperate whisper.

  “I know,” she gasped, “just please.”

  He could feel her begin to give way, and he could feel her tremble. Her energy weakened; she shuddered.

  “Don’t stop,” she begged. He closed his eyes, and pushed the terror in his heart away as he broke through her until he could fill her with all of him.

  He throbbed inside of her; it was the most exquisite thing he’d ever felt. The sensation of her being filled by him drove him over almost instantly.

  As he spilled himself inside of her, it was terror that stole his thoughts. His release was utter perfection. Their energy spun together. It encased both of them, as they existed together; none all his, nor all hers, just the two of them as one.

  “Em,” he whispered as he pulled away as gently as he was able.

  “How badly did I...?” his voice trembled, and he fought to steady it. “How badly are you hurt?” He held her to him.

  “I’m ok,” she seemed relaxed. He could feel that, but he could also feel the raw, tender pain as she lay on him with nothing between them.

  “Do you want me to?” He placed his hand on her mound, over the approximate place where he’d just broken through her. She smiled sweetly.

  “You can’t heal me, Rainer,” she soothed. “If you did, then it would just hurt like that every time.” He nodded; he wasn’t thinking clearly.

  “But it won’t...” he hesitated.

  “It won’t ever hurt like that again,” she assured him.

  “Can I do anything at all?” he pled. She shifted slightly, but shook her head and clung to him.

  “Just hold me.” He wrapped his arms tightly around her, held her to him, and cradled her body to his.

  “I love you,” he whispered, “so much.” She smiled against his chest.

  “I love you, too.” She was tired. He could feel that, as well. When she was lying against him, when he was at peace with her, he could feel the very essence of her now, after what they’d just shared. It was a gift he’d never take for granted.

  “Go to sleep, baby, I’ve got you.” He kissed her forehead, tried to calm her body, and soothe the pain. He kept his hand over her abdomen and cast her pain in his soothing energy.

  She relaxed against him. He watched her and felt her breath steady. Her eyes drifted closed.

  He lay there, awake in the peaceful silence, for a long while. He cradled her while she slept, and kept her protected as he tried to soothe the pain he’d caused. He watched over her constantly. As his energy began to stabilize, he moved his soothing cast over her entire body.

  He’d never get enough. He knew one lifetime with her like that would never be long enough. Instantly he decided what his first significant purchase would be with the fortune he’d just inherited. He smiled peacefully as he fell asleep, wrapped up in her.

  Thanks Dad

  Rainer’s eyes blinked open as he felt Emily slide from the bed. Her hair tickled his chest. Not fully conscience yet, he was aware of the sunlight as it poured through the windows. He watched Emily hesitantly walk to the bathroom; she winced.

  “What’s wrong?” he leaned up on his elbows instantly.

  “Uh,” she looked at him like he might’ve lost his mind. He felt sick.

  “Oh, right, sorry.”

  She smiled.

  “I’m fine, Rainer; go back to sleep. We’re supposed to be on vacation.” He stayed in his upright position until she came back to bed.

  “You ok?”

  She smiled and nodded. “Much better than ok,” she assured him as he pulled her back to him.

  “Em,” he began. Rainer decided he’d rather talk than sleep. She gazed up at him sweetly.

  “I’m gonna go out on a limb here and guess that your dad isn’t really going to want me holding you naked all night while we sleep, and I really don’t ever want to sleep any other way,” he teased, and she laughed. The sound soothed his soul.

  “So, I guess, I was wondering if you’d maybe like to take a small part of what my parents left me, and get a place for us to live, or maybe me and you, and Logan and Adeline?” he considered, as Logan had already asked him to be his roommate.

  “Really? You’re sure?” A broad grin spread across her features.

  “Well, I mean, I’ve been living with you for a while now, and you haven’t kicked me out yet.” This brought on more laughter. She rolled her eyes.

  “Yeah, but what if I get on your nerves, and then you don’t want to marry me?”

  “You would never get on my nerves, but we can get married first,” he instantly offered, “if, say, you want to do that this week.”

  “Slow down there, cowboy,” she drawled and made him chuckle.

  “I think we may need to see how Adeline is doing when we get back, and then try to find a place. I mean, we have a few weeks before we start work.”

  He nodded, though this wasn’t quite the response he was after. He knew he did need to slow down. He just didn’t want to think about sleeping in a room without her ever again. He didn’t want to think about doing anything without her ever again. He was so much more when he was with her, and he felt empty when they were apart.

  He leaned up, and studied the clock on the bedside table.

  “Do you want some coffee, baby?” If she was wincing just going to the bathroom, Rainer thought that staying in bed seemed like the best idea.

  She grinned. “It’s ok; I’ll get it.” She started to scoot out of the bed again, but he pinned her down and made her laugh.

  “You’ll stay here. I’ll make us coffee, and I think your mom packed us some donuts. So how about breakfast in bed?” he offered sweetly.

  She beamed, but then studied him as she read his energy.

  “I’m really fine, Rainer.” She’d read his fear over her pain.

  “Ok, but that doesn’t mean I can’t get you some coffee and a few donuts.”

  She shrugged and bit her lip.

  “If you really don’t mind?”

  “I really want to take care of you, Em, always.” She swooned. Tears formed on her lashes as she nodded.

  “Thank you.” She fell back on her pillow. She hugged the one he’d slept on to her chest and inhaled deeply. Rainer chuckled, and kissed her cheek as he pulled the covers back over her. After he tugged his boxers back on, he moved to the kitchen.

  Rainer filled the coffee pot with water and turned it on. Then he went to the baskets containing the small amount of food Emily and Mrs. Haydenshire had packed, and dug out a box of glazed donuts; Emily’s favorite. He smiled as he set them on a plate he’d pulled from the cabinet, and waved his hand over them. He heated them until the glaze was just starting to melt.

  While he waited for the coffee to finish, he glanced back in the basket. His father’s safety deposit box was in there. He’d thrown it in, thinking Emily might go through it with him. It was no longer locked, so he casually lifted it and pulled it open. There were letters tied together with a ribbon. Underneath, there were several bonds--many decades old. He had no idea how to calculate their worth, but assumed he should put them back in the bank. His eyes landed on a small black velvet box. He furrowed his brow, and his heart picked up pace as he lifted it into his hand.

  After glancing down the hall to make certain that Emily was still in their room, he drew a deep breath. The hinge gave a slight creak as he opened the box. A gold band fell into his hand, but as he looked at the notched slit in the box, there it sat; the enormous, diamond engagement band that had been his mother’s.

  His heart raced as he carefully removed it.

  ‘All my Gifts I give to you,’ was engraved on the delicate band, so small that he was barely able read the words. The thicker gold band had both of his parents‘ initials and wedding date on it. Swallowing hard, he returned both bands and snapped the box shut. He clenched hi
s jaw and looked out the window to the restless ocean... timeless and everlasting.

  “Thanks, Dad,” he whispered before pouring coffee and cooling it slightly with his hand. He poured in cream and sugar, and returned to Emily.

  She was sitting up, her legs crossed, and wearing another of his Academy t-shirts. Disappointed that she’d put on clothes, he smiled at her and tried not to let on. She couldn’t just walk around naked, endlessly, as much as he’d like that. He chastised himself. He set the two mugs he'd tediously balanced in his hands on the bedside table, then handed her the plate of donuts.

  “I hope these aren’t all for me,” she teased.

  He chuckled.

  “Well, I thought I might eat, as well.” He winked at her, and watched her cheeks color slightly.

  “So what do you want to do today, baby?” he asked before he inhaled half of a donut in one bite. He suddenly realized he was starving.

  She gave him a deliciously naughty grin and waggled her eyebrows. He shook his head and gestured downward on her body.

  “You cannot possibly want to do that again, yet.” He wasn’t letting her downplay the pain.

  “And how do you know what I want, Mr. Lawson?” she sassed. He shook his head.

  That was his Emily. People most certainly did not tell her what she wanted or when she wanted it. He’d always thought that,though her hair was a deep auburn, almost brunette just like all of her brothers, somewhere deep in there it was fiery orange. He was usually the one person who could persuade her. Her parents even occasionally came to him to try to get her to see something a different way.

  “Ok, how about this,” he drew a deep breath before he took a sip of coffee. It was pretty good, he noted, mildly impressed with himself. “I cannot do that again until I know that it isn’t going to make you hurt even worse.” She melted before him.

  “Rainer, I really am fine, much better than last night. And even though it was...you know...a little...” she paused as she searched for the appropriate word.

  “Excruciatingly painful,” he provided for her. He suddenly felt the threat of the donuts making a return visit.

  “No!” she scoffed and rolled her eyes. “Tender,” she amended, and then gave him a sweet adoring smile. “It was the most amazing thing I’ve ever felt, and I want to feel it again...and forever,” her voice trailed off with the last two words.

  She stared at the sheets and blankets strewn around the bed. She was worried that he felt different. Rainer was astonished.

  He thought of the years of Amative Energy classes he’d sat through at the Academy. She could feel his every emotion because his release was inside of her. It would be the closest read she would ever have, except for when she carried his child. Whenever any part of his Gifted DNA was inside of her, she could read him instantly. Somehow she was reading his excitement and nerves over the ring, over all that they’d done and his fear and guilt that he’d hurt her. The intensity of the combined emotions had confused her and left her feeling uncertain.

  How could she be worried about that? It was utterly preposterous. His mind immediately went back to the ring in the deposit box. He would not ask her until he’d talked to her father. He couldn’t. He respected Governor Haydenshire too much for that. He owed him much more than that, but he also would not allow her to sit beside him in bed, after what they’d shared the night before, and allow her to feel insecure. So, he weighed his options.

  “Emily,” he soothed. “Look at me, please.”

  She lifted her eyes to his.

  “I love you more than life itself. I wasn’t kidding when I told you I’d marry you this week. I’d marry you today,” he vowed. “But I know that you deserve an engagement and a wedding, just like you’ve always wanted.” He smiled and recalled all of the times she’d forced him to play wedding with her when they were kids. She’d usually make Logan officiate.

  He couldn’t help but laugh as he recalled the time Logan tried to make her vow to eat worms from the garden. She furrowed her brow as she wondered what brought on his laughter.

  “I was just thinking, maybe we’d get a real minister, instead of Logan, for the actual wedding.”

  She doubled over laughing, and he listened intently. It was one of the sweetest sounds in the world, he decided. She quieted and seemed to study him.

  “Are you sure? I mean, I didn’t feel like you really liked last night all that much and....” she faltered as tears came to her eyes.

  “Em!” he gasped and stared at her in shocked disbelief. “How could you think that?”

  “I don’t know,” she said quietly. And then he couldn’t stand it. He couldn’t let her sit there drowning in doubt. He pulled her to him as he shoved away the plate between them.

  “I could feel how scared you were,” she whispered; her voice caught as she trembled in his arms. He drew a deep breath.

  “I was terrified.” He’d gladly tell her exactly what he had felt and explain what she’d felt from him. She was an extremely Gifted Receiver. Rainer amended his earlier thoughts. She’d felt every confusing emotion that had coursed through him as he’d made her his own, while it was happening. She’d been able to feel him long before his semen was inside of her.

  “Sweetheart, last night was the mostextraordinary night of my life. I was terrified to hurt you. I guess I always knew that was how it had to work, but it nearly killed me. That’s why I was so scared. I want to be with you like that forever. I want to feel you in every way I possibly can, but I guess....” He wasn’t certain how to put this in words. “You could feel that I was scared when I had my fingers in you, right?” She nodded, and he forced himself to continue. “Em, I could feel that I was hurting you when I was inside of you,” he explained; the sudden realization etched her face.

  “Oh, Rainer, I’m so sorry,” she shook her head. “I didn’t think about that. So, that’s what Garrett is always talking about.” She was referring to Garrett’s rather crude comments on being with Non-Gifted women, ones that Rainer wasn’t aware Emily had ever heard.

  “I suppose.” He’d certainly never been with anyone but Emily, and he never wanted to be. But he understood how it would lessen the level of commitment, if you weren’t able to feel what the other person was feeling when they were with you. She turned back to him, but was still speculative.

  “But, I mean, you didn’t hate it?” she stammered and bit her lip. She looked terrified once again.

  “Baby,” he shook his head. There seemed to be too many emotions to sort through. She’d felt the fear over anything else from him, and it had frightened her.

  “I hate that I hurt you. I don’t really understand why it has to be that way, but to share that with you is the most amazing thing I’ve ever felt. I want to feel that for the rest of my life, as often as you’ll let me have the honor.”

  A small smile played across her lips as she nodded and seemed to finally believe him.

  “So you really want to be engaged and get married?” she trilled as she tried hard to hide her excitement, but failed miserably.

  “I really want to be your husband, but I’ll settle for being your fiancé for a little while, I guess,” he teased.

  “Rainer, I don’t know. I mean I don’t want you to get me a ring or whatever just because I freaked out. I want you to do it when you really want to,” she uttered almost silently, “if you really want to?”

  He clenched his jaw tightly. Whatever she’d felt from him the night before had done a real number on her, and he was determined to undo the damage. He drew a deep breath, and considered for the length of a few heartbeats.

  “Emily, I have a ring.”

  Her mouth fell open, her eyes goggled to the size of dinner plates, but Rainer shook his head.

  “I haven’t talked to your dad, and I will do that first, ok?” He wasn’t letting her change his mind.

  To his relief, she nodded and looked delighted by his determination.

  “And when I ask you, I want it to be perfec
t, Em. You deserve that. Please just let me get this all worked out. Let me ask your dad. Then, when I put that ring on your finger, I want you to know you have always been it for me. My whole world rises and sets with you. You’re all that matters.” He held her close, and wrapped her up in his arms wiping away the escaping tears.

  “I just cannot believe how lucky I am.”

  He smiled and tried to hide his chuckle.

  “And that’s why you’re crying?” he teased as he tried to earn her laughter, instead of more tears.

  “No, I’m crying because I am the happiest girl in the entire universe right now.” They both laughed at the juxtaposition. “Can I see it?”

  “No,” he drawled.

  She’d gotten him, and he hadn’t even realized what he’d just admitted.

  “So it’s here then.”

  “Emily!” he scolded, and she grinned mischievously.

  “Ok,ok. When are you going to talk to Dad?”

  Rainer tousled her hair, still tangled from sleeping, as he raised his eyebrow.

  “Wouldn’t you like to know?”

  “Yes!” she nearly shouted.

  He winked at her.

  “You, Miss Haydenshire, will only be engaged once; therefore, you should let your boyfriend really do this right.”

  She nodded, and giggled sweetly and lay back against him. He could feel her happiness. He could feel the peace that his revelation had brought her, and it soothed his soul.

  The Ties that Bind

  She leaned up to study him. Debate swam in the depths of her eyes. Suddenly she leaned in and brushed her lips across his.

  He tenderly held her face as he formed her lips around his own. She moved to lie down, and he moved with her. He continued to kiss her and to taste her. That was all that he’d been able to feel from her for so long, and yet it was still just as breathtaking, even though he knew now that there was so much more.

  She was his, and the knowledge overwhelmed him. She slid her hands down his bare chest, kneaded his skin, and grasped him in her hands. She pulled him closer, as he groaned from the sensation.