Ultrahuman 01 - Ugly

by Niall Teasdale

  ‘I suppose I did. Confess, I mean.’

  ‘Very honest of you.’

  Penny giggled. ‘I was rubbing his nose in it, actually.’

  June returned the giggle. ‘Everyone knows about Tina, so most of the girls aren’t buying his story. They are a bit surprised at your reaction though.’

  ‘Oh?’

  ‘Yeah. You’re taking it too calmly. I think they’re worried you might go all Bunny Boiler on him.’

  ‘Haven’t they been paying attention? I take everything calmly.’ Her head snapped around at a voice from behind her, but there was no one there. Again.

  ‘You okay?’

  ‘Yeah. I’m not sure. Probably. I keep hearing voices.’

  ‘Are they telling you to cook family pets?’

  ‘They aren’t telling me anything. I hear what sounds like a voice, but I can’t really hear it, y’know?’

  ‘Not really, but… You don’t think it’s something to do with…?’

  ‘If it was, wouldn’t I have been hearing it all week?’

  June shrugged. ‘We don’t really know enough about it. Maybe there’s some of it that hangs around even when you’re you.’

  ‘If it does, it would have been nice if it’d fixed my eyesight.’

  ~~~

  ‘Ow! Damn!’ Penny lifted her thumb to her mouth and sucked. ‘Also,’ she mumbled around her thumb, ‘it’d have been nice if it’d fixed my ham-fistedness.’

  ‘Cut yourself?’ June asked, heading for the drawer where they kept the band aids. Penny cut herself with a kitchen knife, on average, about once a week.

  ‘Uh-huh. Maybe I should shift when I’m home. We’d save a fortune on medical products.’ She held out her bleeding thumb so that June could wrap a blue sticking plaster over the wound.

  ‘That looks nasty. It’s gonna sting for a bit.’

  Penny gave a timid smile and went back to chopping the carrots. She would have to remember to wash them again before cooking them. She sighed and cursed her luck and…

  The sudden flurry of voices seemed to come from all around her. They were clearer, but she still could not understand the nonsense they seemed to be speaking. Her head jerked around, but there was no source for the sounds, nothing to see anywhere until June grabbed her shoulders and the whispering stopped.

  ‘Pen? Are you okay? Did you hear me?’

  ‘More of the voices,’ Penny replied, her voice trembling. ‘Louder. I could hear words, but not in any language I’ve ever heard before.’

  ‘That’s… a little worrying.’

  Penny gave her friend a timid smile. ‘I’ll worry when they start telling me to murder you in your sleep.’

  ‘Maybe you should let me finish the cooking.’

  ‘It’s my turn,’ Penny replied, frowning.

  ‘It won’t kill me, and you’re learning to be you again.’

  Pouting, Penny handed over the knife and went to sit down on the sofa. There was nothing much to do until True Powers was on in a couple of hours, but June was right. If she was going to have some sort of panic attack when cutting vegetables, then maybe sitting down was a good idea.

  When June walked over to sit beside her, Penny was peeling the band aid off her thumb.

  June frowned at her. ‘That is not going to heal if you play with it.’

  Ignoring her, Penny licked at where she had been cut and rubbed at it, frowned, and held her hand out to show June. ‘It stopped stinging,’ she said.

  ‘Oh,’ June stated flatly. There was no wound, just a slight reddening of the skin, and that was fading. ‘You heal fast. Not super-fast maybe, but faster than normal.’

  ‘Well that settles that. Some of the other me leaks over.’ She frowned. ‘I stubbed my toe the other night and I didn’t really think about it, but that stopped throbbing pretty quickly.’

  ‘Well,’ June said, ‘given how accident-prone you are, that’s a really useful thing to have carry over.’

  Penny grinned. ‘I wonder if it’s faster when I’m changed.’ She started to get up.

  ‘Oh no. You said you’d stay like that until Saturday.’

  ‘Okay. Saturday I’ll cut my finger and see if it heals faster.’

  June groaned. ‘This is going to end in tears. I can tell.’

  5th January.

  Penny walked out of her bedroom, tying the belt of her wrap closed, with a sense of relief. She was back as Penny the swan. The desire to go out and right wrongs was back, but at least she was moderately sure the voices would be gone. Stray sounds and random whispers had plagued her all week. An evening without something alien whispering in her ear would be quite pleasant.

  ‘You’re going to go through with this then?’ June asked from the kitchen. She was holding up a kitchen knife.

  ‘You’re the one holding the knife,’ Penny commented. ‘I’m just happy there isn’t anyone talking to me except you.’ Nevertheless, she held out her hand for the knife.

  June handed it over, swallowed, and watched as Penny slid the edge of it over her thumb. ‘Uh… isn’t there supposed to be blood?’

  Penny looked at her thumb and frowned. There was no sign of a wound. She tried again, pressing harder. She could feel the knife pressing against her skin, and there was a white depression line in its wake. It faded quickly. Her frown deepening, she stepped over to the counter, put her hand on the chopping block, and brought the point of the knife down on the back of her hand.

  ‘No!’ June shrieked.

  ‘Not even a bruise,’ Penny said.

  ‘You almost gave me a fucking heart attack!’

  ‘Sorry.’ Penny looked at her friend and started giggling.

  ‘It’s not funny,’ June grumbled.

  ‘It’s a bit funny. Anyway, that settles it. I’m at least knifeproof. I’d better start doing something with this.’

  ‘It could still be dangerous. Criminals use guns.’

  ‘I’ll worry about that when I have to face one, which will be after I’ve learned to fight, which could take months.’ June was still looking worried. ‘I’ll need a costume…’

  ‘Oh right, so you’re going to go out putting your life at risk and you want me to design a costume for you?’

  ‘Uh-huh.’

  June grinned. ‘Okay.’

  ~~~

  ‘No.’ It was a rather blunt refusal and Penny had not been expecting it at all.

  ‘I… I don’t understand,’ she said.

  David Chou stood with her at the rear of his dojo, a stern look on his face. Behind Penny a dozen or so young men in street clothes were going through various sparring exercises. Chou’s attention was on them, not Penny.

  ‘I will not train you in the martial arts,’ Chou said. ‘Is that clear enough for you?’

  ‘But… why?’

  ‘Women have no business in this line of work, Miss… whatever your name is. I teach you, you go out and get yourself killed, and I feel responsible. Go home and leave the crime fighting to those with the talent for it.’

  Penny looked at him for a second or two. She could tell he was not going to change his mind. To him, she was of no interest. She was a pretty little girl with pretentions of being a hero.

  ‘I honestly didn’t think anyone had such a medieval attitude to women these days, Mister Chou,’ she said, ‘but if that’s what you believe then I’ll find someone who doesn’t live in ancient China.’

  ‘You do that,’ he replied flatly. ‘If you’ll excuse me, I have men to train.’

  Annoyed, Penny turned and headed for the door. Where was she going to find someone to teach her if the Knights would not?

  ~~~

  Penny felt more uncomfortable walking into the Huntress’ Den than the first time. She was wearing the same dress, because she only had one suitable outfit for clubbing, in either form. That made her feel self-conscious, even if June said no one was going to remember. They were also there to ask a favour of the Huntress herself, so it was not exactly a social visit. June w
as treating it as such, and Penny suspected she was hoping for a replay of New Year. Well if that was all that happened, it would still be a better result than the dojo.

  It almost seemed as though the club’s owner had been expecting them. She intercepted them as they walked toward the bar, just giving June a slight smile and a twitch of the eyes toward the rear of the room. They followed her to her office without a word being said.

  As soon as the door was closed behind Penny, the Huntress turned on her booted heel, lifted up onto her toes and kissed June. Not knowing where to look, and not seeing an immediate end to the kiss, Penny just stood there, dumbfounded. When the blonde-haired heroine broke away June was panting.

  The Huntress glanced at Penny. ‘Sorry. My back’s playing up and the endorphins are a Godsend.’ She grinned. ‘Besides, your friend is worth kissing.’

  ‘Uh… No need to apologise. I don’t think of her that way, but I can understand the attraction.’

  ‘I assume that you didn’t come tonight to watch me seduce June?’

  ‘We’ve a favour to ask,’ June said.

  The Huntress strutted around her desk and sat down, lifting her heels up to rest on the edge of the dark wooden surface. She waved to the other two seats. ‘Ask away.’

  June sat down first. ‘P… Oh… We don’t have a name for her.’

  ‘Let’s just call her Penny, shall we? Everyone’s called me “Red” since I was a kid, but it’s Regina if you’re feeling formal. I think there’s no secret about that these days.’ Penny did recall that her real name was Regina Jacoby. ‘I took the liberty of doing a little research, since I rather enjoyed your company, June, and you were hanging around with a mysterious, new Ultra. I have no idea how Penny Worthington has become the woman sitting there…’

  ‘That makes three of us,’ Penny put in.

  Red smiled. ‘Whatever the case, I came to the conclusion that it was likely that the two were the same person. I won’t be mentioning it to anyone else, but you might wish to be careful about it.’

  ‘Yeah,’ June said, ‘especially since Pen wants to learn to do the whole crime fighting thing.’

  ‘I need to learn how to fight,’ Penny said. ‘I’m strong, damage-resistant, I can see in the dark, and I can fly. And it’s more like I need to do it than I want to.’

  Red looked at her for a long second. ‘You’re sure about this? You understand the risks?’

  ‘I… think I do.’

  ‘You know what happened to me, I assume. Most people don’t know the details.’

  ‘I know you were injured in a drug lab. Whatever happened stopped your career.’

  Red nodded. ‘I’d followed some leads, looking into a new designer cocaine variant. I found the production lab and I was about to go in and take the place out. Something hit me from behind. An energy weapon of some sort, or so I was told. It took me three months before I could walk again. The blast fused two of the vertebrae in my spine. I suffer from chronic pain that comes and goes, but what it really did was blow my confidence. I started second-guessing myself and that’s the kind of thing that gets you killed.’

  Penny gave a nod. She had never been the most confident person and even in her new body she did not feel like that had changed. But… ‘I think I have to at least try. If… Well, if I’m no good at it then I guess I’d have to stop, hopefully before I get badly hurt. But I have to try.’

  ‘All right. We’ll go back to my place tonight. In the morning I’ll take you to see a friend of mine. If you can persuade him to train you… Well, let’s say he’s uniquely qualified to teach someone with your talents.’

  ~~~

  ‘Oh wow…’ Penny whispered, her eyes on the huge canvas mounted over the fake fireplace in Red’s apartment. They had not had to go far; the apartment was at the top of the building above the club. Now they were standing in the lounge, a room which owed much to the Art Deco movement, looking up at Red, in costume, as she had been six years earlier. The subject of the picture was still downstairs.

  ‘That’s what I said,’ June commented. ‘She looks amazing, doesn’t she?’

  The canvas was at least eight feet high and showed Red holding her longbow before her, an arrow with red fletching crossed over it. Her face was partially obscured by a red, half-face mask. It did a reasonable job of concealing her identity, unless you knew her. The wavy cap of blonde hair had not changed much it seemed. Her costume had always been sexy, a high-hipped one-piece with high points over the breasts and split low between them in burned orange and red, with silver metalwork wiring it all together. There were matching bracers and thigh-high boots with five-inch heels. She really did look amazing.

  ‘Mind you,’ June added, ‘you should see the ones she has in her bedroom…’

  ‘I think,’ Red said, emerging from the elevator, ‘that Penny might be less appreciative than you of those photographs.’

  ‘Oh… Well yes, I suppose she wouldn’t have quite my outlook on them.’

  ‘I’m missing something,’ Penny said, eyeing the two of them.

  ‘You remember that charity calendar they did about ten years ago?’ June asked. ‘Well she has her photoset up in the bedroom.’

  ‘Wasn’t that a nude calendar?’

  ‘All very tasteful,’ Red said, a slight smile playing over her lips. ‘They made half a million dollars for children’s charities off that calendar. Ironic, if you think about it.’

  Penny giggled. ‘My Dad bought a copy of that calendar. My mother let him off because it was for charity. I don’t think she was entirely convinced though.’

  ‘I don’t really need to be reminded of how old I am, young lady.’ Red was grinning anyway. ‘Now, it’s getting early and if I’m to enjoy the rest of the evening we should retire.’

  ‘Uh, yeah,’ Penny said, ‘about that…’

  ‘I do have more than one bedroom in this place, Penny.’ Her smile turned mischievous. ‘Though if you’d like to join us…’

  6th January.

  ‘You look a little bleary eyed,’ Red commented as they drove down south toward North Beach.

  ‘Had trouble getting to sleep,’ Penny replied.

  ‘So did I,’ June countered, though she was smiling a lot as she said it.

  ‘I know. That’s why I had trouble getting to sleep. You know, we could have stopped off and got some better clothes for meeting a martial arts master.’

  ‘No,’ Red replied. ‘Bobby has an eye for the ladies. I don’t think he’ll take you on simply because he likes the look of you, but it won’t be a hindrance.’

  ‘Oh… right. You know I make a really terrible vamp.’

  ‘That dress should be vamp enough. Now, Bobby’s naturalised, like me…’

  ‘You’re not American?’ Penny asked, surprised.

  ‘Ah, so some of my secrets remain to be uncovered then. I was born in England. Bobby is Brazilian, or was. He grew up on the streets of São Paulo, never had that good an education, but he learned to fight. When he also learned to fly he adapted his fighting style, Capoeira, into what he calls Capoaira. Not entirely original, but it gets the point over. Capoeira is an acrobatic martial art, Capoaira is an aerobatic one.’

  ‘It’s going to take months!’ Penny moaned.

  ‘I shot my first arrow when I was ten,’ Red told her. ‘It missed. If you’re going to make this work, some patience would be a good idea.’

  ~~~

  Whoever Bobby was, his home was partially hidden in the woods on the south-west end of North Beach. It looked, to Penny’s mind, like an odd sort of architectural design. Actually, it looked a lot like a three-tier wedding cake with windows in it. The middle section was higher than the other two floors and had no windows at all, which only made the place look odder.

  There was a large, sliding door on the ground floor, and Red went straight to it, pulled it open, and walked inside.

  ‘He knows we’re here,’ she commented as they entered an entrance lobby shaped like a wedge with the
point cut off. ‘He’s got every way in monitored some way or other. Being an ex-active doesn’t mean your old enemies don’t stop trying to kill you.’

  ‘There’s a plus,’ June said. ‘What about you?’

  ‘The club’s secure, and that car we came in? Armoured glass, Kevlar panels throughout.’ She carried on walking, through the door into the central part of the house, and stopped in a circular room on the other side. Then she raised her voice. ‘Bobby? Get your bony ass down here. You’ve got guests.’

  ‘I know.’ They all looked up at the sound of the voice. The room had no ceiling; above them was a wide hole which, presumably, was the way up to the next level. ‘And three lovelier guests I cannot imagine, but one of them wants me to teach her my art, no?’ He spoke English with an accent, something like Spanish, Penny thought.

  ‘Yes, sir,’ Penny called back. ‘That would be me.’

  ‘Then a test, gatinha, come up and meet me.’

  Red turned and looked at Penny. ‘Looks like you’re on your own. He has all the more public rooms down here, there are no stairs or ladders up, and we can’t fly.’

  Penny frowned. ‘No… If this is a test, then I should ace it.’ Stepping between Red and June, she wrapped her arms around their waists and said, ‘Hold on tight, I’ve never tried this before.’ Both non-flyers looped their arms around her and Penny looked upward, willing herself to rise. She was slower than normal; carrying June had not slowed her down, but two women in her arms was apparently enough to make things harder. Still, a couple of seconds later she was touching down on the floor above.

  And it was huge. The entire floor was devoted to probably the oddest dojo Penny had ever heard of. There were mats on the floor and a weight training area, but there were also hoops and poles strung from wires attached to the ceiling. Red had said this ‘Capoaira’ was an aerobatic martial art; presumably that was an aerial obstacle course.

  Standing in the middle of the mats in a T-shirt and jeans was a slim, muscular man with jet-black hair and slightly olive skin. Good-looking, but not really handsome. The knife scar on his left cheek marred rather than improved. He was clapping.