GUILTY OR HOT

by Carson, Mia

  “That they are,” he agreed, kicking a rock with his booted foot. The dogs trailed behind them, looking ready to turn in, too. He slid the barn door open and closed it again once they were all inside. Mel hadn’t seen the room yet, but Delcie assured her it would be perfect for their stay. “Brace yourself,” Danny warned her when they reached the door to the loft room.

  “I really like your mom,” she said a second later as she stepped inside. “Funny how you came from such a romantic.”

  “I can be romantic if you’d let me,” he huffed.

  She pressed her hand onto the bed. “This is going to be a fun night.”

  “Before we… ah, turn in,” he said, and she turned to see him holding an envelope. “I found this in the jacket you gave me. I didn’t read it, and from the look of it, you haven’t either. I thought you should have it back.”

  He held it out to her, but Mel’s hands stayed at her sides. “No.”

  “No? Mel, it’s a letter to you from Robert.”

  “That jacket… He wore it before he left,” she said stiffly. “Whatever it says—”

  “Whatever it says might be that last bit of closure you’re looking for,” he cut in and stepped closer. He took her hand and curled her fingers around the letter. “Read it, please. I want us to be together, but I don’t want you to have any lingering doubts, either. I want all of you, Mel. I think that’s fair.”

  She gripped the envelope and watched as he walked to the door. “Where are you going?”

  “Giving you a few minutes’ privacy. I’ll be close by.” He walked out and closed the door tightly behind him, leaving Mel holding a letter from her dead husband.

  Her hands shaking, she sank onto the bed and ripped it open, bracing herself. She unfolded the thick paper and checked the date. It was the night before he left. Mel took a few deep breaths to steady her nerves and read. Tears blurred her vision, and she wiped them away as her eyes roamed over the slanted handwriting and the words she never expected to receive from Robert:

  My dearest Mel,

  I know you better than you know yourself, and I know one day you’ll find a letter like this. I’ll tell you I’ve written one every time I left you behind, just in case I never came home. I hate writing those words, but it’s a truth we both have embraced over the years, a truth one day I worry you’ll have to deal with on your own. If that day comes, if I leave you, you can’t fall into a dark pit of despair. You can’t hide away, not forever.

  I loved you from the first moment I laid eyes on you dancing in the rain on campus, and I will always be with you. In your heart, in every board of that inn we built together. I will be there for you, but you have to promise me something, make this my final wish. If I don’t come home to you, you have to swear you’ll move on with your life. We’ve had a great run, God, we even have a baby on the way. I never pictured myself as a dad, but you, I know you’ll be a great mom. You love with all your heart, always have, and I can’t bear to think of you being alone if I leave you behind. You have made my life better than I ever imagined, and I want you to do the same for someone else and let them be there for you. Let someone take care of you. Don’t be the stubborn pain-in-the-ass I know you can be. Don’t you dare stop caring about yourself. Do this for me, for yourself, don’t wallow in grief forever, and don’t you dare think life is not worth living.

  I love you, Mel, I will always love you. Move on with your life, find love again, and know that I’m always watching over you.

  Mel’s tears rolled freely down her cheeks as she reached the end of the letter. She whispered the last words out loud. “You deserve to be happy again. Love, Robert.” Her hands fell to her lap, and she sniffed hard, holding the paper tightly in her grip.

  Her tears slipped down her cheeks and wet the letter, smearing the ink, and with those tears, the last of her grief fell away. Robert was right. Their time together had been wonderful and she would never forget him, but she couldn’t fade away. She needed to move on. He wanted her to, scolded her to take care of herself and make a new life for herself.

  The hairs on the back of her neck prickled, and a draft brushed past her body, but the door was still tightly shut, as was the window on the far side of the room.

  “Robert?” she whispered. He wasn’t there, couldn’t be, but it didn’t stop her from looking. She smiled softly and folded up the letter. “Thank you.”

  Mel rose and looked at the candles lining the walls and the suitcases by the door. She thought she was ready to fully commit to Danny before, but now, she was ready to throw herself headfirst into the relationship and see where the wind took them. Her first order of business was showing Danny exactly what he meant to her. Fear was no longer a part of the equation over what might happen. Danny was her home now. She sensed it deep in her bones. Never had she believed in love at first sight, but now, she knew Robert had been in her life to guide her to Danny, the man who would not tolerate her stubbornness and be her rock when she needed one, her shoulder to cry on, and her protector. He would be her everything.

  Mel picked up her suitcase and unzipped it, not sure what she was hoping to find, but as she dug to the bottom, she found a paper bag from the boutique in Westbend and a note on it that said it was from Cindy and Donna. Apprehensive, she opened the bag and stared at the sexy, black, lacy lingerie, silk ties, a blindfold, and chocolate-covered strawberries.

  “Thank you, ladies,” she whispered and dumped the bag on the bed.

  She slipped into the lingerie, lit the candles around the room, and opened the wine Delcie had left for her as a gift. She knelt at the foot of the bed, the blindfold in one hand and silk tie in the other, as she waited for Danny to return. She had texted him a minute ago, and he’d said he was on his way back with some whiskey he’d filched from the kitchen. His feet pounded on the steps, and her breathing quickened as her thighs clenched together. The door slid open, and he stepped in.

  “Did you read…?” He choked at the sight of her and closed the door quickly behind him.

  “I did,” she replied. “And I have my closure. Now, I want to spend Christmas Eve doing something I love with a man I want.”

  The candlelight flickered around them as he set down the whiskey and approached the bed slowly. His pupils dilated, and the growing bulge in his jeans excited Mel as he drew closer. His strong, solid form elicited a predatory vibe that he was here to conquer her, body and soul, and if she let him, he would take her heart as well. That was fine with her because she was after his. Danny breathed in deeply through his nose as the muscles strained in his neck. As his eyes passed from her head to her shoulders then lower to her barely concealed breasts, Mel’s lips parted on a sigh as if his hands stroked across her skin. When his smoldering gaze dropped lower, wetness pooled in her cleft and her thighs shimmied together, anxiously waiting for him to part them.

  They had spent all week in each other’s arms, talking about their lives. Tonight, she didn’t want to talk or plan. She only wanted him.

  Danny kicked out of his boots and quickly relieved himself of his shirt. Mel’s tongue flicked out to wet her lips, and his shoulders stiffened. “Blindfold,” he growled. “Put it on.”

  Mel set the thick silk ties on the bed and held his gaze until she tied the black silk around her eyes. “How’s that?” she breathed, her senses on high alert as she heard him move closer to the bed. The silk rustled on the bed as he picked it up.

  “Perfect,” he whispered, so close she could have touched him, but when she reached out, all she grasped was air.

  His deep laugh raised goosebumps on her arms as she waited for him to take all she offered. His fingers brushed up her right arm, and her head turned, though she couldn’t see him. Gently, he laid her back on the bed and lifted her arms over her head, holding them firmly in his one hand. She expected him to use the tie, but his hands smoothed down her arms from wrist to shoulder and the bed sank when he added his weight to it. Mel’s body rose to meet his, but again, he remained out of r
each. The heat from his hands coursed through her as they ran down her curves to her hips, squeezing them. Then his hands disappeared, and Mel nibbled her lip and shifted her hands, but he captured her wrists again.

  “No,” he whispered in her ear, sucking hard at her lobe until she moaned quietly.

  His tongue traced the soft shell before trailing down her neck. His hand left her wrists, and she grabbed the pillow behind her head to keep them where he wanted. The mattress shifted as he moved, and his hands glided up her legs, massaging her calves and higher as his mouth followed. Each caress of his lips sent a fresh shiver down her spine as want pooled in her belly. Her panties grew wetter the higher he climbed until his hands gripped her thighs and spread her legs apart. Warm breath between her legs tightened her grip on the pillow while his tongue traced the hem of the lace and something else pressed against her folds.

  With each breath, the silk tie he hadn’t used to tie her up glided over her clit and swollen folds aching to be sated by him again. Back and forth, he dragged the silk, pressing hard with each pass. Mel groaned at the crushing weight of pending pleasure escalating in her twitching inner muscles. Her nipples hard against the thin layer of lace, she released the pillow and cupped her heavy breasts, tugging at the points as Danny quickened the pace of the silk.

  “Danny,” she whispered harshly. Incoherent cries flitted past her lips, and her back arched high off the bed, her hips bucking against the silk as the electrifying orgasm tore over her. Her body jerked as he continued to run the silk between her legs, unrelenting until he drew a scream from her and she collapsed into a heart-shuddering mess on the bed.

  “Where… where did you learn… to do that?” she gasped, reaching for the blindfold.

  “I’m not finished yet,” he growled and tugged the black silk back down over her eyes. All she managed to see was the intense hunger burning in his brown depths. He tucked her hands behind the pillow again, and once she was settled in, tugged her panties down her legs, inch by agonizingly slow inch. “So wet,” he groaned. “I could bury myself deep within you.”

  “Do it,” she begged hotly.

  “Soon,” he promised, and his hands smoothed up her belly to the barely-there bra. He reached for the clasp and removed it, one arm at a time, before putting her hands back behind the pillow.

  While his tongue circled her pert nipple, teasing it with his teeth, he palmed her slickness. Her heels dug into the bed as her legs widened for him, but when he fingered her, quick and hard, she cursed at the sudden welcome intrusion. His fingers twisted and turned, spreading her wider as his mouth ravaged her nipples, suckling harder and harder while his thumb pressed against her nub of nerves. Mel wanted to hold him, to grip his throbbing length in her hands, but she kept them tucked away. His mouth popped free of one nipple, and he kissed along her breasts to the other, dragging it into his burning mouth.

  The sharp tingling grew, stretching taut like a string from her breasts to her sheath until it snapped, sending her tumbling over the edge as a second orgasm tore her apart at his touch. When his fingers came free, she whimpered at the loss, but she heard his jeans hit the floor. A moment later, he returned, rolling her onto her stomach. His mouth covered her back in kisses while her body struggled to recover. As his swollen length pressed against her ass, she trembled, desperate to have him fill her, take her fully, claim her as his own. She pressed her rear into the cradle of his hips until his shaft rubbed between her soaking lips, but he moved and his fingers filled her again. On her hands and knees, she could do nothing but ride his hand hard as he pounded into her. One hand slipped down to hold her breast, tugging hard on her nipple. She lost her balance from the insanity of the tremors convulsing her muscles, and he lay down with her, her back to his chest on their sides, and his fingers never stopped their continual drive.

  His hand was still at her breast, but she wanted more and gripped it. When his fingers brushed her lips, she sucked on one hard, licking it until he grunted behind her. He filled her in every way possible, and she still couldn’t get enough of his desire to dominate her body. With his finger in her mouth, she moaned, pushing herself even harder against his hand. Just when she braced for the next orgasm, he rolled her back to her stomach and yanked her up to her knees. He positioned her hands on the headboard and dragged his shaking hands down her body to grasp her hips.

  His shaft grew slick from her dripping sheath, and with one hard thrust upwards, he buried his length within her. She gripped the headboard, stretching as he swelled even more within her. His guttural curse turned into a growl as he pounded into her. He reached for her breast, holding it firmly in his palm as he thrust again and again, a new rush shooting through Mel’s body each time. She tightened her muscles around him, and his pace quickened until they both lost all sense of control. Mel tore the blindfold from her face, and the room spun around her. His hands reached out to hold hers on the headboard, and his body covered hers. Their fingers intertwined as they moved with an easy rhythm, shifting and adjusting as if they’d been lovers for years, not days. His shaft grew within her as he thrust one final time, seating himself to the hilt, and their bodies toppled together to the bed in a mess of arms and legs. Their groans echoed around the room.

  “I vote… we use the blindfold… more often,” he said in between breaths.

  Mel nodded against his shoulder. “Yeah, they’re fun.”

  “And the other stuff,” he muttered as his eyes widened. “Please tell me those were not in the gift basket Ma left us?”

  Mel burst out laughing, picturing his mom doing just that. “No, Cindy snuck them into my bag before we left,” she said, wiping a tear of mirth from her eye. “You’re safe, promise.”

  His head sank back into the pillows and he dragged her as close as he could so their lips pressed against each other. “Having a better Christmas yet?”

  “You know, I think from now on, Christmas is going to be one of my favorite holidays,” she mused and wiggled free of his arms so she could lounge across the bed, stretching for her open suitcase.

  “What are you doing?” he asked with a laugh until his mouth found other uses and she jerked.

  “Are you trying to make me fall off the bed?” she grumbled as her heart pounded behind her ribs. Her fingers snagged the small parcel from her suitcase, and she tossed it over her shoulder, right at his face.

  “Ouch! What the hell was that for? I thought you were enjoying yourself.”

  “I am.” She sat upright as he held the package. “Open it.”

  “Christmas is tomorrow,” he argued, but she crossed her arms, hiding her breasts from view, and he glowered. “As if that would stop me.”

  She knew it wouldn’t, but she held her ground. “Open it. Please?”

  He narrowed one eye at the parcel in his hands but tore through the paper and examined the small box. “It’s tiny,” he said and shook it. Something small rattled inside. “Sounds metallic.” He lifted the lid, peering inside before he snapped the lid closed again. Showing no emotion, he opened the box again and pulled out the keychain with two keys attached to it. “Keys?”

  Mel’s hands twitched nervously. “It’s a key to the inn and a key to my apartment,” she informed him. “I don’t have much to give, but I wanted to thank you for everything, and I’m not sure how this is going to work, but I want it to, and this is so you know you always have a place with me—beside me—whenever you can be here.”

  Danny clutched the keys tightly in his palm, and the overwhelming love in his eyes struck her right through the heart. He dove across the bed and rolled with her in his arms, kissing her fiercely. “I love it,” he whispered against her lips. “More than you could ever know.”

  As the night wore on around them and the moon rose high over the empty fields, Danny held Mel close. There was no tragic news, and no wondering if she’d make it through another year. She’d found her new home and it was in the arms of this man.

  Chapter 12

  Danny grunt
ed when a curvy body snuggled against his under the comforter, her ass fitting perfectly in the cradle of his hips. He tightened his arm around her, breathing in the subtle strawberry scent of her hair and kissing her neck sleepily.

  “I think we should get up,” Mel mumbled through a yawn.

  “Why? This is comfortable, and I enjoy being comfortable,” he grumbled, nuzzling her neck until she squealed and squirmed against him. He tickled her sides as she cackled, struggling to break free of his grasp, but he didn’t let up until she begged him to stop and nearly whacked him in the eye with her flailing. He rolled them over, pinned her to the bed, and kissed her soundly. “You sure you want to get up?”

  She pointed past his arm, and Danny looked over his shoulder. “I think they’re hungry.”

  Three sets of black eyes watched them from the foot of the bed, their tails thumping on the floor and ready to pounce. Danny tried to slowly break eye contact, but too late. Xena barked, and all three hounds leapt onto the bed, laying across their bodies as they licked their faces. Mel spluttered and grabbed hold Xena, scratching her behind the ears as Danny lay trapped beneath the other two.

  “You just had to make eye contact,” she mused. She whistled, and all three jumped off the bed.

  “I didn’t know that would trigger them.” He sucked in a breath as he lay flattened on the bed. Xena hurried over and nudged his head with hers, whopping him in the chest with her massive paw until he pursed his lips at her. “I’m fine, girl, I promise.”

  “Your parents are probably up by now, too.” Mel dug around in the suitcase for clothes. “Why couldn’t you have a bathroom in here?”

  “I just, you know, opened the window back in the day,” he teased.

  Mel smirked as she tugged on her dressy dark jeans, red sweater, and black boots and tossed clothes at Danny when he didn’t get out of bed fast enough. He wasn’t going to complain. She was happy, ecstatic even, on the morning of a holiday she used to hate. If she managed to stay in a good mood the whole day, he’d call it a miracle and a job well done. A good mood today meant that tomorrow, when they flew back to New York and he told her the truth, she could remember the past week or so and realize he had the best intentions. People did crazy things for love. Waking up this morning with her in his arms, his body completely sated from the night before, there was no hiding from it any longer.