by Bec Botefuhr
“Marcus, I want you. How many times do we have to go through this possessive, jealous crap? I need your trust as much as you need mine.”
He looks up at me and his eyes are glassy and pained.
“I do trust you, sweetheart. But seeing you there…it hurt.”
“I know, but I was just trying to get rid of him. I have nothing left for Ben, not a god damned thing.”
“There was a photographer,” he sighs.
“I know.”
“That will be front page news tomorrow.”
“What are we going to do?”
He rubs his temples. “I honestly don’t know. If Chayne sees that, she might just have enough…”
“We didn’t do anything Marcus, we didn’t get caught kissing.”
“No, I suppose you’re right. It’s not hard evidence.”
“I’m sure it will be fine, let them throw it at us.”
He leans back in the chair. “I want you staying with me until this blows over.”
I nod, not bothering to argue. He’s not going to hear it, not today. We both fall silent and remain that way the entire drive to his place. When we get in, he walks inside and drops his briefcase and phone onto the kitchen bench. He turns to me, unfastening his tie. I feel my chest clench, the look in his eyes is that of exhaustion and pure confusion. Like he’s just had enough. Have I lead him to wonder why he’s bothering with me? Have I ruined a good situation? Are Marcus and I just destroying each other slowly?
“I’m going to have a shower, order some dinner ok?” he says in a tired voice.
“Ok,” I whisper.
He pulls off his shirt and I catch a glimpse of his back as he disappears into the bathroom. With a sigh, I pull out the menus by the phone and look them over. I order some pasta and red wine, then I change out of my school clothes and get into some comfy cotton pants and a singlet top. When Marcus comes out with a towel wrapped around his waist, I can’t help my gaze. It travels over his damp, hard body. His hair is dripping down onto his cheeks and god, he looks so delicious. I make a mewling sound and want so badly to walk over and tear that towel clean off his body.
“Sierra,” he warns.
“Do you regret me, Marcus?” I whisper, meeting his eyes.
He narrows his eyes and shakes his head. “Do you think I regret you?”
“You’re looking at me right now, like you’re exhausted and tired of trying. Like maybe you regret getting involved with me because it has caused nothing but pain.”
He walks over, stopping in front of me. I can feel the heat from his body against my skin and I shiver. He grips my face, titling my chin up.
“I’ve felt a lot of things in my life, Sierra. I’ve felt pain, anger, disappointment and regret. I know them all too well. What I know, right here, right now, with you…is that I love you. It’s not easy, but I never expected it to be. I never…ever thought Chayne would go down without a fight and this would just be a walk in the park. I will fight until my last breath for you, Sierra Walters. You should know that by now.”
I look up into his eyes, and I do the one thing that will let him know I feel the same. That I’m willing to give myself to him completely. That I trust him and most of all, that I love him. I lower slowly to my knees. When they hit the floor, I look up at him.
“Sir,” I whisper.
“Baby,” he murmurs.
“I trust you. I love you. I want all of you. I want it all, right now.”
He kneels down in front of me, taking my face in his hands. “You’re too beautiful to be on your knees, sweetheart. I thought once that was what I wanted from you, but you’ve taught me that control isn’t everything. That having a submissive isn’t everything. You giving yourself to me, it’s what I’ve always wanted from you, but baby, you don’t need to be on your knees for anyone, ever again.”
I feel tears fill my eyes and I grip his face. “I want to do this for you, I want you to do this for me.”
“Then we’ll do it, but you need to get off your knees. You’re not lower than me, Sierra. You’re right here, in perfect line.” He says, tapping his heart.
He helps me to my knees and together we stand. He grips my hips and lifts me, putting my bottom onto the counter.
“No more knees, but you can still call me ‘sir’.”
I smile and laugh softly. “You can take the male from the dom, but you can’t take the dom from the male.”
He laughs. “That made no sense.”
“It did in my head. I don’t want you to change for me, I kind of like your control.”
“Oh don’t you worry, you won’t escape my possessive control easily. It’s just…I want you to know in the bedroom…it’s no longer about that to me. Making love with you, on the same level…baby…it doesn’t get better than that.”
I give him a half, lazy smile and stroke my fingers over the stubble on his cheek. Before we can say more, our pasta arrives. Marcus pays the delivery boy and then comes back in, placing it on the coffee table. We both sit on the ground and open the boxes. The smell of cheese, garlic, tomato and pasta fills my nose and I groan. My stomach agrees with me by rumbling loudly. Marcus chuckles and pours two wines and we both begin to dig into the food. Mid-way through, I decide to ask him something I have wanted to ask him for a while now.
“Do you think we’ll ever be able to do this without hiding?”
He places a forkful of pasta into his mouth and thinks a moment. “Yes, I would like to think so.”
“Do you think Chayne will just get over this and move on?”
He frowns. “No, that much I know.”
I frown. “I wish she could just see it’s over and leave nicely.”
“She knows there’s a lot of money up for grabs.”
“Money, it’s an evil thing.”
He nods his head. “Right. Open your mouth.”
I do as he asks, and he pops his fork full of pasta into my mouth. I giggle as I slide it off and chew the delicious morsel.
“Did you just feed me, Marcus Harrison?”
He grins. “I did. Next we’re going to curl up on the couch and watch a movie. I may, or may not cop a feel when I pretend to yawn.”
I laugh. “Are we going to make out?”
He wiggles his brows. “I think we’re going to make out.”
“Second base?”
“If you’re lucky.”
“Are we going steady, Mr. Harrison?”
He grins and leans back against the chair, patting his full, but still firm, belly. “I think we’re going steady, Miss Walters.”
“Well, damn!”
With that, I crawl over and position myself in his lap. He wraps his arms around me and grins, pressing his lips to my head.
“What are we going to watch, sweetheart?”
“Oh you know, something totally scary so I can bury my face into your arm when I’m afraid.”
“Nice plan.”
“I’m full of them,” I say, snuggling closer.
“You wanna know something, sweet girl?”
“Always.”
“I love you.”
I feel my eyes burn with unshed tears at his words. I press my nose into his chest and breath him in, deeply.
“Wanna know something, sexy sweet?”
He chuckles. “Always.”
“I love you, too.”
CHAPTER 12
SIERRA
“What the fuck? Get me the number of that fucking reporter right now, Candice.”
I jerk to the sound of Marcus yelling. I roll and groan, my body is pleasantly aching after one long, hot night of Marcus and me…well…fucking. Well, it was more of a combination actually. Sex and making love. I sit up wearily, running my hands through my hair and trying to detangle the knots. I wish we could all wake up as sexy looking as the girls in the movies. Seriously, they wake up with perfect hair and make-up. It’s rude really.
“Find it, Candice, now! You tell them I am requesting it.”
I rub my eyes and turn my face to the door where Marcus is yelling at his poor assistant. What has she done now? I get out of the bed and pull on some light clothes, then I walk out into the lounge where Marcus is pacing, back and forward and clearly furious. When he turns to face me, I see something in his gaze that worries me. It’s pity and a look of sympathy. God what has happened?
“Find it, Candice and call me back. I need that article down.”
He slams the phone closed and walks over to me, carefully, as though he’s approaching someone who is about to break.
“Sit down, Sierra.”
I blink a few times, confused.
“What’s going on?”
“That reporter yesterday…he released an article this morning like I predicted.”
I frown. “He couldn’t have gotten anything too serious.”
“He didn’t…it’s…Sierra sit.”
“What is it?” I say, feeling my stomach clench with nerves.
“Please.”
I sit down on the couch and he grips a paper in his hand, I didn’t even notice it sitting on the table beside him. He walks over and sits in front of me on the opposite couch, meeting my gaze. God, Marcus is looking at me as if I’m not going to like what he’s about to show me. What did the reporter possibly catch to cause this reaction? A few punches? I mean honestly, how bad could it be?
“Remember when I told you Chayne would go to any lengths to bring me down?”
“Yes,” I whisper, my voice far too shaky to be used right now.
“Well, I thought maybe she would try to catch us out and try to say I was cheating. Clearly she hasn’t been able to do that, so she’s gone to the next best thing.”
“And that is?”
“You, Sierra. She threatened to use you, and I told her to stay away but…”
“What did she do?” I say, my voice a high, shriek.
“Sierra…I need you to understand I’m going to deal with this and…”
“Show me!” I scream.
He closes his eyes and hands me the paper with a murmured sorry. I flip it over and my world stops. It just ends right there. It takes me a moment to focus my eyes enough to even read what’s written under the pictures. There’s three of them. The first two are what I expected, the last one is not. I hear my own ragged, pained cry come from my lips as my eyes scan over the picture I never wanted anyone to have to see, ever again. I start with the top line of the paper, and read.
MARCUS HARRISON CAUGHT UP IN A SEX SCANDAL.
The top line is bold, out there and covering the entire top of the page. I continue reading.
Sierra Walters, former assistant to Speaker of the House, Marcus Harrison, was caught yesterday in a love triangle between two men. Our reporters caught the moment as Benjamin Ford, the owner of a large company, showed up outside the White House where Sierra was said to be waiting for Marcus. As you can see from the exchange, Ben and Sierra were getting quite close until Marcus caught them. Marcus Harrison was said to have punched Benjamin Ford, using words like ‘she’s mine’ and ‘stay away from her.’ Onlookers claim that Benjamin fought back, fighting for Sierra also. It seems Sierra Walters has herself caught in quite a triangle. Having an affair with a taken man, while leading another on. It seems Sierra has quite a past, two years ago she was caught up in a relationship where she practiced BDSM. Sierra reported her former lover after he took things too far and left her tied for two days, after he whipped her so much it scarred her body. It seems Sierra hasn’t learned her lesson, because she’s back for more, putting herself between two dominant men and taking the risk once more.
I stare at the first picture on the page. It’s Ben touching my face. The reporter caught it just as I closed my eyes so it looks like I’m enjoying it. The second picture is when Marcus gripped me around the waist, it looks like he’s holding me tight. My hands are gripping his and I’m looking up at him with what looks like deep concern and love. It’s the third picture though that has my stomach heaving. It’s a picture of me that the police took when I reported the assault. Obviously the reporter doesn’t know Ben was the one who did it, or they wouldn’t have posted such crap. I stare at the picture. I am skinny, my wrists are bleeding and there is a small glimpse of my scarred bottom. It’s not enough to be considered exposure, it’s more the side of my hip where the scars travel up to. The police took numerous pictures, and I don’t honestly know how this reporter got hold of them. How do they get hold of anything?
I stand, my legs tremble as I stand and drop the paper. Marcus stands quickly, reaching out to touch me, but I slap his hand away so angrily he winces.
“Don’t fucking touch me.”
“Sierra…”
I turn around, having lost any rational thought. I shove at his chest, hard. I push and push until he’s taking steps backwards.
“You knew she was going to use me! She threatened you and you knew she was going to hurt me!”
“I didn’t know she would take it that far, Sierra.”
“I made a mistake trusting any of this. Now the entire world knows about my past, something I have managed to keep secret for so long. Over you! You, Marcus! You, who is far more concerned about his career than his girlfriend. I should have known, this isn’t even your fault, because I should have known I would never fit into your world. Your job. Your money. Your power. It’s never going to work with me because I’ll never catch a break while Chayne is around.”
I turn and rush off, he doesn’t say anything for a long moment. Long enough that I make it to the bathroom and slam the door. Then I fall to my knees. I scream and cry, gripping my hair and heaving as reality washes through me. The world seen what happened. The world knows. I can never show my face again. Not here. Not at school. I’m done. This will ruin me. Marcus bangs on the door furiously.
“Sierra, open up. Let me talk. I’ll fix this. I will destroy whoever did this.”
I don’t answer.
“Baby please, let me in.”
I still don’t answer. He tries and tries for a good hour, but I think part of him won’t barge in because he knows it will only end badly. He’s silent a moment, and then I hear him on the phone, talking softly.
“Quinn, I can’t get her out of the bathroom. She needs you, please come over.”
He disappears for a moment, then he knocks again.
“Sierra, I have to go and deal with this at work. Please open the door, sweetheart.”
I tuck my knees up to my chin and wrap my arms around my legs and close my eyes. Not wanting to answer. I can’t. I’m so hurt. So broken. So scared.
“Sierra, I don’t want to leave you alone. Open up.”
He slams on the door angrily.
“Come on, Sierra!”
I feel hot tears stream down my cheeks at the frantic tone. He’s worried, I know he is. I know he feels guilty. I don’t blame him. I’m mad at him, yes, but I don’t blame him. I went back. I should have let him deal with Chayne before I ever stepped back into the picture. Would that have done any good? Would it have stopped her? I don’t honestly know, but what happened yesterday…that could have been avoided. I should have never let Ben come to see me. I opened myself and Marcus up to this hurt. I could have quite possibly ruined his career. He’s better off without me. I don’t fit his world.
