Star-Crossed Memories

by Geri Watson

  Star wanted to hit him. By the time she completed her speech, tears were stinging her eyes in embitterment. It was like the two of them had turned into opposites of themselves while they were apart. She hated it, and she blamed herself since she was the one who never called. She'd shut herself off to protect her heart; he'd reached out to try to heal his pain. Star was starting to realize that with blind clarity. Right now Tristan was staring at her dumbstruck over her actions and words. Angry at herself more than with him, she turned away and put her face in her hands. The least she could do was try to collect herself after that uncharacteristic outburst.

  As she was wiping at her eyes, she heard him get up. Then his arms were around her, and she was enveloped in the scent of his cologne as Tristan held her close against him.

  "I'm sorry," he said softly, stroking her hair. "You're right."

  Star shook her head against his chest. "I'm sorry I did this to you."

  "Hey," he tilted her chin up to look him in the eyes, "I did this to myself. You did what you felt you had to do."

  "This is such emotional whiplash." Star sucked in a breath and laughed at herself for getting so upset. "You know how to get under my skin."

  "I can see that." He wiped the remaining tears from her cheeks.

  "So what are you going to do?" She searched his face, trying to find the answer before he verbalized it.

  "Stay with you." Tristan's hand ran down her arm, and he took her hand in his, then brought it to his mouth and kissed her knuckles softly. She opened her hand and ran it over his cheek as he leaned into her touch.

  "Because I asked you to?"

  "No," he answered quietly.

  "Then why?" she asked. When she looked up, Tristan was gazing at her with that look that made her want to melt where she stood.

  He wrapped his arms around her again and brushed his lips against hers. "Because I'm in love with you."

  Her knees went weak. Star was shivering again, but this time it wasn't because of fear. There was something about him declaring it as a fact like that. Her insides felt liquid. Thank God he already had her in his arms. She realized that she should have said something in response, but her brain wasn't functioning. Seeing what kind of effect saying it had on her, Tristan took it to his advantage and kissed her then. That was something she was still capable of doing. Feeling limp in his arms, Star kissed him earnestly until she got the feeling back in her muscles and then she wrapped her arms around him.

  "You're in love with me?" she asked when she could summon coherent words again.

  He pressed his lips to her forehead. "Hopelessly. It's rather disgusting."

  She smirked. "Well, that does explain some things."

  Tristan laughed, and his dimples showed through for a moment. "Figures you'd react by teasing me."

  "Well, I couldn't let you get away with an announcement like that." her smile turned coy.

  "Star, you swooned," he said amused. "Don't act like you were expecting it."

  "Don't tell anyone," she gasped. "I'll never hear the end of it."

  "Maybe I have to tell you I love you more often."

  "I don't think I'd be opposed to that idea," she admitted.

  He kissed her softly again. "So we're going to talk to Dr. Walker, and he's going to fix everything, huh?"

  "I think he might give us some insight on things we haven't thought of. I don't know if that's going to fix everything, but it's a start," Star assessed.

  "What's he like?" Tristan asked curiously.

  "As a teacher, a friend, or as a mentor?" she questioned.

  "All of the above?" he offered.

  Star walked away from him and sat back down on her bed. "I don't know. He's great at all of them. I've worked with him on a lot of his projects and helped him with his research. I sign up for every class he lectures. He's easy to talk to, and you feel like you're talking to someone closer to our age than a professor most of the time. Plus, he's got a great sense of humor. It's dry, but most Psych people’s idea of humor is."

  "You're such a fan of his and yet you never knew he wrote a book?" Tristan eyed her doubtfully.

  "Well, he's written books that I've read before. I never knew he had done any research on reincarnation though. He never brought it up in any of our classes, and there was no research on reincarnation in his office anywhere," Star explained.

  "I wonder why." He crossed his arms, and she could see he was thinking again.

  "I couldn't say. Maybe he wrote it a long time ago?" she guessed.

  "Does he look that different now than in the picture on the dust jacket?" Tristan was in a relaxed stance, but his weight had shifted to one side.

  "I didn't pay that much attention to the picture, to be honest," she said after thinking about it for a minute.

  "Hm." he ran his hand over his chin. "I guess we'll find out after break is over."

  "Which is still a week away," Star reminded him.

  Her mind started wandering to what exactly she was going to do with Tristan and Zack the next week. Usually, she and Zack just bummed around and did nothing in particular. She wondered if Tristan would be comfortable doing that or if he would want to visit Washington D.C. or anything else since he was on the East Coast.

  That made her wonder if Zack would be opposed to hanging out with the two of them instead of sticking close to home here and hanging out with their old friends. She could always leave Zack here while she went off somewhere with Tristan, but it was a habit of hers and felt odd to think about doing anything without Zack while on break.

  Being with Tristan was imperative though. It would be difficult always having to tiptoe around their connection and have to hold their tongues about any blackouts from this point on. She looked over at Tristan, his forehead creased in concentration.

  "Hey, Tristan?"

  "Yeah?" he answered absentmindedly.

  "Should we tell Zack the truth about us?"

  CHAPTER 24

  "Excuse me? Did you just ask if we should come clean to Zack?" Tristan reacted in stunned shock.

  "Well, yeah," Star replied, observing him from her bed.

  He considered it for a minute. Telling Zack what was going on would make things incredibly more easy between the three of them. The idea of explaining things to Zack and expecting him to believe that they hadn't lost their minds was something else. In theory, it was a perfect solution, and seeing as he was already reading Dr. Walker’s book there was a certain amount of leverage to use to their advantage.

  Tristan thought Zack was a decent enough guy, but he wasn't sure if he trusted him enough to be let in on their secret. It wasn't that he imagined Zack would run off and tell everyone, mind you, it was that he might not be so receptive to it. From what Tristan already knew about Zack and Star's friendship he was incredibly protective of her. If Zack felt that Tristan was a threat to Star's life because he was a part of it, Zack may want him gone. He didn't want Zack as an enemy, what Tristan needed was an ally.

  "Do you honestly think he'd believe us?" he asked, looking over at Star.

  "Won't know unless we try." she shrugged.

  "I don't know." Tristan frowned. "I'm not so sure he'd react favorably to it, even if he did believe us."

  "You can trust him," Star said stoically as if she could read his thoughts.

  "Well, what if Zack agrees with me that it might be safer for you if I left?" Tristan questioned.

  Star's face scrunched up. "Oh yeah...hadn't thought about that part."

  "See?" he barbed back. "It's too complicated to get anyone else involved, Star. I wish it weren't."

  "What if we don't tell him that I always die in the blackouts? We could leave that part out, you know," she tried arguing back.

  Tristan could hear the pleading tone in her voice. Sighing, he walked over to the bed and sat down next to her, leaning his elbows on his knees. "I'd rather think about it some more before we let the cat out of the bag. We have to word it the right way, or he's going to freak ou
t."

  "Does that mean yes?" Star leaned against him.

  "If you think it'll-whoa!" Tristan got cut off as she tackled him from the side, and hugged him tightly.

  "This will make everything so much better, I swear. The three of us can hang out, and we won't have to worry about walking out of the room to talk anymore!" Star sounded so happy about it Tristan didn't feel like bringing her back down with the "what if's" in his head. He hugged her back and peeled her off of him.

  "I said I still need to think of how to word it...don't go running out of the room or anything yet," he said smoothly.

  "I know that." Star rolled her eyes at him. "It just makes me giddy to think of us as one big happy family."

  A family? Is that what she thought they'd become if Zack knew? That was...interesting. It occurred to Tristan then that Star must consider Zack a brother more than a roommate or best friend. That explained their relationship a little better than before. He wanted to cringe though. Zack was so bouncy and happy and, well, menacing when he wanted to be. Oh well, guess I'll have to get to know him better.

  Tristan took the chance to look around Star's room. Unlike her place in Seattle, all the furniture matched in a dark cherry. There was a TV cabinet on one side of the room, a dresser along one wall and a queen bed with a nightstand against the other. Above her bed was a large cork-board that had pictures and ribbons attached to it. Curious, he crawled up on the bed to get a closer look at them. Star shot up and stood on the bed, blocking Tristan's view of the board a second later.

  "No," she said, trying to look mean.

  "Aw, come on. They can't be that bad," he chuckled.

  Tristan went to move her, and she shifted and blocked him again. "I said no!" she stared him down.

  Remembering that Zack had said Star was ticklish, Tristan raised his eyebrows and pointedly looked down at her sides. She followed his eyes, and hers widened.

  "Oh, you wouldn't," she glared at him.

  "Let me see what's on the board and I won't," he smiled evilly.

  Star backed into the wall and tried to spread her arms further apart. Tristan grabbed her waist, and she squealed. Laughing, he pulled her to the side and held her away from the board so that he could get a good look at it. The ribbons were for science fairs and some Latin competition. The pictures were about the greatest thing he'd ever seen. She looked so young and cute in them. In one of them, she even had pigtails. There was one of her and a gangly looking boy wearing glasses, both in a uniform and sitting on the roof of a car in front of a video store. Curious, Tristan let go of her and pulled it down.

  "Who's the kid?" he asked, handing it to her.

  "That's Zack," she laughed. "Before he got contacts and bulked up."

  "Wow." Tristan took the picture back and looked at it again. Sure enough, it was Zack; he just looked.... puny. He smirked and put it back. "That makes me feel better about myself."

  Now that the board was exposed, Star sat back down on the bed cross-legged and watched as Tristan browsed through her gawkier years in photos. He saw one that caught his eye and pulled it down to look at it more closely. His eyebrows pulled together as Tristan realized he recognized two of the people in the picture with Star, although they all looked younger. One of them he knew for sure. Star must have seen his expression change because she made an odd face in return.

  "What?"

  Tristan flopped down next to her on his stomach and pointed out the blonde in the picture. "That's Emily. But it looks like it was taken freshman year because she only had that hairstyle for a few weeks before I told her she looked like Madonna and she got rid of it." he laughed. "And that," he pointed to the other blonde "looks like Alyssa, Emily's best friend."

  Star looked at him strangely. "That is Alyssa."

  "How do you know my best friend?" he tapped the picture and looked up at her. "Because if you do, she's been lying to me."

  "I didn't know the other girl. That was the night Alyssa tried to get me to rush the sorority she was interested in with her," Star explained. "Alyssa and I hit it off but...the other girl didn't like me for some reason."

  Tristan laughed. "That's because she's so possessive of Alyssa. They were roommates freshman year. That's how they became best friends. She probably thought you were going to steal her."

  "Your friend is weird," Star stated.

  "Yeah, I know. But Emily's a great friend." Tristan smiled and then realizing something, he laughed. "In fact, she still doesn't like you."

  "Well, that's nice to know," Star groaned. "What did you tell her?"

  "Almost everything," Tristan admitted. "I was pretty messed up when you didn't call. Emily helped me through it." he looked down at the picture.

  "I'm sorry," Star said softly.

  He shrugged. "Not a problem now. But it was then. Emily took me with her to a bunch of mixers and stuff. That's how I got to be friends with Alyssa," he chuckled. "She's something else."

  "I know," Star smiled. "That's why I love her so much."

  She was quiet for a few moments and looked like she was thinking. "Hey! That's how you got my address and Zack's phone number!"

  "Busted." Tristan looked up at her again. "I couldn't believe she knew you."

  "Did you know that the whole time?" Star asked, squinting at him suspiciously.

  "No!" he said quickly. "I didn't know at all until Emily e-mailed me and told me Alyssa was dating Alex. Then she said something about Alex's best friend being Zack and I kind of put things together from there."

  "Wait a minute. Alyssa is dating Alex?" Star raised an eyebrow.

  Tristan shrugged. "That's what Alyssa told me. She said you broke his heart and she was mending it," he smirked.

  "That sounds like Alyssa," Star snorted. "God, she didn't wait very long to pounce."

  "When did you break it off?" Tristan grabbed one of her pillows and propped himself up.

  She chewed her bottom lip. "Thanksgiving."

  "Can I ask why?" he wasn't sure if she'd answer, but he was curious.

  "He was in your spot," Star shrugged.

  Tristan looked at her, confused. "He what?"

  Sighing, Star explained what had happened with seeing Alex sitting on her bed and how badly it had spooked her. Then she told him how she had immediately broken up with Alex the next day. When she was done, Tristan scratched his head.

  "That's interesting."

  "What's interesting?" she asked, looking puzzled.

  "It's interesting that you knew way back then that you missed me and yet you still decided to ignore it." He smiled at her so she could see he was teasing, but when he looked over, her face had almost crumpled.

  "Hey, I was kidding." He scooted closer and wrapped his arms around her, even if it did feel awkward in the position he was in. "Don't get upset."

  "Not funny."

  Tristan sat up and got off the bed. "I'll work on my humor then. I thought you said you guys liked it dry?"

  Star shook her head. "Nice try." She got up and went over to the door. "Let's go back downstairs."

  They quietly went back downstairs, making sure that her parents didn't discover them leaving her room together. When they walked back into the family room, the fireplace was dimmer, and Zack was still curled up in the same position, except he had eggnog in a glass next to him. He looked up when they entered.

  "What were you two lovebirds up to?" He broke into a wide grin.

  Tristan smiled. "Looking at old pictures of you."

  Zack shot a look at Star. "Oh come on. You let him see those?"

  Star shrugged innocently. "Sorry. He threatened to torture me if I didn't."

  Zack ran his hand over his face, embarrassed. Then he looked back at Tristan. "Don't you dare tell anyone about those!"

  "Oh, I won't," Tristan answered. "I'm good at keeping secrets."

  Zack looked from him back to Star. "You better hope he is."

  Tristan watched as Star walked over to Zack and grinned up at him. "Don't worry. He
won't tell anyone you used to be a dork."

  "I was not a dork! I was malnourished and blind!" Zack shouted back.

  Tristan stifled a laugh at Zack's outburst and sat on the couch.

  "Hey! Christmas Vacation is on! We should watch it," Star suddenly said and flipped on the TV.