by Kiki Swinson
“Can you please move down from my chest?” I begged. But my words fell on deaf ears. Matt’s mind was made up. He knew he was going to fuck me no matter if I wanted it or not. I could tell that he was taking great pleasure, too.
For the rest of the time in that room with Matt, I closed my eyes and tried to block out the horrible act he was inflicting on me. The sounds of his moans and the thrusts he made while he was inside me sickened me. I could feel the blood flowing out of me. The whole thing felt messy and disgusting. And when it was finally over, it felt like he was still on me. When I asked him could I go in the bathroom to wash up, he gave me the green light to do so, but he escorted me in there. I guess he thought I was going to try to escape or something. I couldn’t believe how he sat on the toilet and watched me shower the entire time I was in the bathroom. He made the young lady watch my baby while we were in the bathroom. “Lisa, go in the room and watch her baby while she takes a shower,” Matt yelled. That was the first time I found out what her name was. I noticed she jumped every time he asked her to do something. I wondered why Kanan allowed this. It was all too weird for me.
While I was showering, Matt made a few comments about my body. Talking about how good I looked. I ignored him for the most part. I swore, the way I felt right then, I’d kill him and then kill myself. But when I thought about how I’d be leaving my son on earth all alone, I got a grip on myself. I knew I had to get out of this jam for the both of us.
17
THE NEXT MORNING
My baby woke up at three AM for a bottle and then again at six AM. I wanted to make his bottles both times myself but Matt wouldn’t let me out of his sight. While he and I lay in bed, he demanded, “Lisa, go in the kitchen and make another bottle.” She looked so pitiful as she dragged herself from the kitchen and into the bedroom where we were both times and I felt extremely bad for her. She seemed so nice. I thanked her both times. But for some reason she wasn’t feeling me. It almost felt like she didn’t like me because I was with Matt. Was she fucking him and I didn’t know anything about it? Whatever it was, I could tell that she wasn’t too happy.
A few hours later, Kanan knocked on the door in an alarming manner. “Yo, Matt, we need to talk,” he yelled through the door. It startled the hell out of me.
Matt got up and opened the door. I was already sitting up on the bed with my back against the headboard, cradling my baby in my arms. “What’s up?” Matt asked him while they both stood at the entryway of the bedroom door.
“I just got a call from Ant out the way and he said the cops is crawling all over the spot and the streets of Huntersville looking for her and that nigga that we got rid of last night,” Kanan said. He looked really spooked. And for the first time I saw that nigga shook. He acted like he had just seen a fucking ghost.
“Did they go inside the house?” Matt wanted to know.
“Yeah, Ant said they went in that joint in the middle of the night and they been roaming the streets asking questions about who own the place and who be in there,” Kanan continued.
“Say word!” Matt commented. He started looking worried too. I was getting a kick out of this. Both of these niggas supposed to be hard-nosed criminals, and one mention of cops looking for them got them running around with their tails tucked between their legs.
“Yo, Matt, but that ain’t it. Ant said they got the newspeople out there filming and asking questions so you know it’s about to be on TV,” Kanan said.
“Turn the TV on and listen out for that shit. I’ll be out there in a minute,” Matt instructed Kanan.
Immediately after Kanan walked away from the door, Matt closed the door and instructed me to get up, grab the baby and follow him into the den area. Since I already had on my clothes, I was ready to leave the room when Matt made his exit. The only problem I felt I had was that I didn’t have a spare of clothes to change into, but when I thought about it that was the least of my worries. I was going to rob a bank in a few hours. That was what I really needed to be concerned with. Not fucking spare clothes. I needed to figure out how I was going to get in there, get the money, and get out without getting caught. That was it. Everything else was secondary.
When Matt and I entered into the den, I sat on the same love seat I sat on the night before. Juice and Kanan were in attendance but Preech and that chick Lisa weren’t. I wanted so badly to ask where they were but I knew that was a no-no. So I left well enough alone. I figured I’d find out sooner than later.
Kanan had turned on the TV like Matt had instructed him to do. It was on the local news station too but a commercial was being televised. But about three minutes later, Kanan’s cell phone started ringing again. He answered it on the first ring. “Yo, Kev, what’s up?” he said. I watched his body language the entire conversation. Matt sat on the other sofa and watched him too.
“What channel is it on?” he questioned Kev, and then he picked up the remote control from the coffee table and began sifting through the channels. When he landed on Channel Ten, he paused and laid the remote control back down on the table. “Okay, I got it,” he said, and then he disconnected the call.
The Channel Ten news team was front and center alongside the trap house Kanan ran. The streets were flooded with onlookers and neighbors trying to get firsthand information why the cops bum-rushed the trap house.
The news broadcast was being aired live. A white woman stood alongside the street and spoke into the camera that was before her. I listened intently to the reporter’s words and quickly realized this shit was real.
“In breaking news this evening, Norfolk city police are searching tonight for two missing people. The first person is a male by the name of Trevor Glasper, who happens to be a college student at Norfolk State University. The second missing person is a woman by the name of Chantel West. We have no other information for her but that she checked into the Hilton Hotel on the corner of North Hampton Boulevard a couple of days ago and that she hasn’t been seen since yesterday. I’m told that the police are combing through all the evidence at this residence, as well as the hotel room at the Hilton Hotel where the woman was staying. I’ve had a chance to speak with one of the detectives assigned to this missing person’s case and I’m told that they’ve only spoken to a limited number of witnesses, but they feel confident that their efforts will lead to the whereabouts of the two victims and the arrests of all those involved. So, if you’ve seen or know where these two people are, please contact the missing person’s division of the Norfolk City Police Department. The number you can call is 877-MISSING1,” the reporter said, and then two photos of Trevor and me were posted on the television screen. I can’t lie, seeing my face on TV spooked the hell out of me. I couldn’t believe they used the photo from a copy of my fake driver’s license. People like my relatives and old friends would no doubt call into the missing person’s unit and let the cops know that Chantel isn’t my real name. So now I was fucked!
As soon as the news broadcast was over with Matt and Preech turned their attention toward me. “So, you’re using that Chantel ID, huh?” Matt commented sarcastically.
I nodded my head and then I looked down at my baby boy.
“And you were staying at the Hilton, too,” he added with a smirk on his face.
I continued to ignore him. “Well, it looks like you won’t be able to go back there. The cops are crawling all over that place looking for you,” Matt continued.
After Matt made the comment about the cops crawling all over my hotel room, I thought about all my shit that I’d left behind. “Shit!” I cursed under my breath. How freaking careless could I have been? What little bit of money and clothes I had left was at the hotel and I wouldn’t be able to go back and get it. How stupid could I have been? I was truly fucked right then.
“Are y’all sure y’all got everything from out of that spot?” Matt asked Kanan.
“Yep. Juice cleaned it out real good,” Kanan assured Matt.
“When you got rid of that nigga’s body, did y
ou leave it exposed?” Matt needed reassurance that those dumb-ass niggas did what they were supposed to do.
“Nah. We good on that. Ain’t nobody gon’ find that nigga’s body for weeks if not months,” Kanan said, and then he cracked a smile. But he was lying through his freaking teeth. He had Preech put a slug in his head after they dragged him out the back of the truck. Then they left his body out in the open so it could be found. I swear, I wanted to burst Kanan’s bubble but I left well enough alone. I learned very early that you’ve got to pick and choose your battles. Well, this battle would be the one I’d leave alone. I wanted to leave so I could get my son and me out of that place and back to New York where he and I belonged.
Preech grabbed the remote again but he used it to turn down the TV’s volume. “You know you’re gonna have to be extra careful out there while you’re doing this last score. You don’t want the people in the bank to recognize you and be able to give the cops a good sketch of you,” Matt said.
“Yeah, this shit just got real. With your face all on TV ain’t no way she’s going to be able to do this score,” Kanan pointed out.
“Oh nah, she’s gotta do this job. I won’t have it any other way,” Matt protested.
“Do you realize what risk she could pose?” Kanan said.
Matt stood. “Whose operation is this?” his voice boomed.
“It’s yours,” Kanan replied in a cowardly manner.
“Well, let me run this motherfucker the way I wanna run it!” Matt huffed as he walked toward Kanan. I swear for a moment there Matt was going to square off with Kanan. But when he started explaining how things were going to proceed and lowering his tone, I figured Kanan was no longer in any danger. “Look, all she’s going to need is some makeup and a pair of sunshades. That’s it. And if you handle things appropriately by getting in there and getting out, this score could go off without a hitch. Speaking of which, call Lisa and see where the fuck they at. I sent them to the store to get an extra pair of gloves, so why the fuck they ain’t back yet?” Matt continued.
Kanan pulled out his cell phone and called Lisa. She answered the call on the first ring. Kanan put the call on speakerphone so Matt could hear the conversation.
“Hello,” Lisa said.
“A yo, Lisa, this is Kanan, Matt wanna know where y’all at?”
“We just pulled up. We’re outside the house,” Lisa replied.
“Hurry up,” Kanan told her.
“Yeah, hurry the fuck up!” Matt chimed in.
* * *
A few minutes later Lisa and Juice walked into the house. Lisa carried a small bag of items while Juice walked inside empty-handed. Matt went straight into question mode. “What the hell took y’all so long?” he asked.
“I got hungry so I told Juice to stop me by Burger King,” Lisa explained.
“But didn’t I tell y’all to go and get what I asked for and then hurry up and come straight back?”
Lisa and Juice both nodded.
“So then why did you do the total opposite?” Matt hissed as he walked toward Lisa.
Lisa stood there motionless. It was apparent that she was at a loss for words. This pissed Matt off. “So you don’t have shit to say, huh?” he questioned, standing face to face with her.
“We only stopped because I was hungry,” she tried to explain. But that wasn’t good enough for Matt.
“Do you think I give a fuck that you were hungry? I’m running on a time schedule and because you wanted to stop to feed your fucking face, you threw me behind schedule,” Matt’s gruff voice boomed as he grabbed a handful of Lisa’s hair and yanked her head up so that her eyes met his gaze.
“I’m so sorry!” she rasped, flinching at the blow her surprised her with. BOOM! I even flinched after his fist connected to her face. He hit her across the face again. This time blood filled her mouth. Tears immediately sprang from her eyes. I swear, I thought he was getting ready to kill her.
I wanted to beg him to stop hitting her so badly, but I knew I’d be compromising my and my son’s safety. So I looked at Kanan, hoping I’d get his attention. It seemed like he should’ve been the one to chastise Lisa, not Matt. I swear, this shit was so unbearable I had to bury my face in my hands to avoid looking at them.
“Matt, I’m sorry. Please stop! I promise I won’t do it again,” she pleaded with him through tears and swollen lips.
Tears were running down Lisa’s face like a faucet. My heart ached for her. Under different circumstances, I knew I would’ve jumped to her defense. I couldn’t believe the man I once loved was getting a kick out of inflicting pain on defenseless women. His face was filled with hate. He acted like he had something to prove. Something to prove even with me. It was if he was sending a message to me that if I fucked him over again, I might as well kiss my life good-bye.
Matt finally let Lisa’s hair go with a shove. The force was so great that she flew backward and fell down on the floor. “Fuck with my time again, bitch, and you’re gonna really be sorry!” Matt yelled at her.
Lisa didn’t say another word. She sat there on the floor like she was a rag doll.
Normally I couldn’t care less about other women, but this case was different. I felt so bad for her and only wished that she and I both got away from this guy before he killed us both.
While Matt continued on with his tirade, I watched everyone’s reaction in the room. I found myself looking back up at Kanan. I still could not believe how he’d just let Matt treat Lisa the way she was being treated. I also watched Kanan’s body language because I could tell that he wasn’t feeling Matt after Matt undermined his authority when it came to hatching the plans out for the bank robbery. So when Matt started talking about how we were going to enter the bank, I saw Kanan give Matt the look of death a few times. He hurried up and changed his facial expression every time Matt turned Kanan’s way.
Then I looked at Juice, who was in another world. He acted like he was high or spaced out. Whatever the case was, Matt didn’t seem to care because he didn’t say a word about it. Next up was Preech. Preech seemed like he was engrossed in every detail of Matt’s elaborate plan to rob the fucking bank. And Matt noticed it, which I assumed was why he gave Preech the most attention. If I hadn’t known any better, I’d have thought that Preech was trying to take Kanan’s place.
Last on the list was Lisa. She was still on the floor but she managed to ease her way back against the wall. She gritted on Matt when he wasn’t looking. But she quickly changed her expression when he looked back in her direction. I noticed through my peripheral vision that she looked at me a few times. And when I’d casually turned around to glance at her, she’d turn her head. I wanted so badly to tell her that I wasn’t her enemy. She and I were both in a fucked-up position. I just prayed that I would be one of the lucky ones to get away.
“Juice, I want you to go and switch up the license plates on the Charger because that’s the car y’all taking,” Matt announced.
“I’m on it, boss,” Juice replied, and rushed out the front door of the house.
“Lisa, I want you to get up and do Lauren’s makeup. Her face was plastered all over the fucking TV so you gotta make her look like somebody else,” Matt instructed her.
I watched as Lisa dragged herself up from the floor. She seemed reluctant to do anything for Matt. And still Kanan’s bitch ass hadn’t said or done anything in her defense. I lost all respect for that weak-ass nigga.
“Kanan, I’m gonna need you to navigate this whole mission. You’re in charge. So that means you gotta make sure this shit runs smoothly. You gotta make sure y’all get in that fucking bank, get the money, and get out of there without any hiccups.”
“I got it. We gon’ be good,” Kanan reassured Matt.
By this time Lisa had gotten up off the floor and left the room. She came back a few minutes later with her makeup kit in hand. She walked over to where I was sitting. She stood there for a moment and looked at me. She had a smug look on her face that made me feel uncom
fortable, so I asked her what was the problem. She didn’t respond to me. She looked back at Matt and said, “I’m gonna need more light than this.”
Matt turned around toward her and then he looked up at the light in the ceiling. “That ain’t enough light for you?” he asked her.
“It would be if I was just slapping on some lipstick and eye shadow. But you want me to make her look like someone else and I ain’t going to be able to do that in this light.”
Matt thought for a moment and then he said, “A’ight, you can do that shit in the bathroom but don’t take too long. And leave the door open so I can keep an eye out on y’all.”
“All right,” Lisa replied, and then she looked back at me. “Come with me to the bathroom,” she said.
I cradled my baby boy tightly in my arm and stood up with him while I held his bottle in my other hand. I absolutely avoided looking into Matt’s direction by looking down to the floor as I followed Lisa out of the room. To get away from Matt was a heavy load lifted from my shoulders even if I was only in the next room. “Lauren, don’t try any sneaky shit!” Matt warned me while I walked away.
I totally ignored him and followed down behind Lisa. Immediately after we entered the bathroom, Lisa instructed me to sit down on the closed toilet seat. So I did. She turned on the light and prepped her makeup brushes and colors so she could start on my face. I sat there quietly for the first few minutes to feel her out. But after I heard the warmness in her voice when she instructed me to hold my head back and close my eyes, I knew then that I could talk to her.
I started off with a few general questions to feel her out. And I also made sure that I talked as quietly as my voice would allow me to while Matt ran over the plans with the guys in the other room. He was pretty preoccupied so he wouldn’t hear our conversation if we turned our volume up a couple of notches. “Do you do makeup professionally?” I started off asking.
