Far From Home

by Megan Nugen Isbell

  “Hi! You must be Riley!” she exclaimed with a thick, southern accent. It was obvious she had not grown up in Carver and I made a note to ask Jesse about that.

  “It’s nice to meet you,” I said, stepping over to her and extending my hand. She shook it and then stepped back, folding her arms as she looked me over.

  “Well…Jesse told me you were pretty, but he didn’t tell me you were a knock out. I love your hair and your skin is so tan. What are you? Mexican or something?” she said with a large grin and I didn’t know if I should be offended or not that she’d even brought up my heritage.

  “Actually, my father’s Greek.”

  “Well, that explains it. Whatever you are, you’re gorgeous. You’d better hang on to this one, Jesse Dean,” she said, turning to shake a finger at him and I felt Jesse squeeze my hand.

  “Is dinner almost ready?” Jesse asked.

  “About fifteen more minutes,” his mom answered.

  “Do you mind if I grab a quick shower then?” Jesse asked, turning to face me and I shook my head, although I really didn’t want him to leave. I didn’t think I was ready to be alone with his mom.

  He kissed me on the cheek and I watched him until he disappeared down the hall. The room grew quiet aside from the sound of the exhaust fan over the stove.

  “Can I help with anything Mrs….” I said, and then hesitated not knowing what to call her.

  “Marlene. Call me Marlene, hun. And no, everything’s all set. Just take a seat and relax.”

  I did as she suggested and looked around the room while she continued getting dinner ready. It seemed weird having a woman…a motherly type, in the kitchen and I couldn’t help but eye Marlene suspiciously as she moved about the room.

  “So,” she said, tapping a spoon on the edge of a pot before laying it on the stove and turning to face me. “Jesse tells me you come all the way from Boston.”

  “Yes, I do.”

  “A Yankee, huh?”

  “Well, I’ve never thought of myself as a Yankee, but I suppose I am.”

  “Never thought my boy would end up with someone from up north,” she laughed and I recoiled a little at her use of the term “my boy”. Jesse was not her boy. She’d abandoned her boy sixteen years ago.

  “Well, it’s funny how things work out then.”

  “Jesse also tells me he had to go all the way to Boston to convince you to come back after some little asshole kicked you to the curb,” she said and I cringed at how much Jesse had shared with her in such a short time as well as how tactless she appeared to be.

  “Jesse’s been very good to me,” I said, saying the only thing I could think of.

  “Well, you just be careful with men. They’ll break your heart every time and that’s a guarantee.”

  I didn’t say anything as she started bringing stuff over and setting it on the table. I’d already gathered one thing about Marlene and that was she was strange and clearly lacked class.

  She finished by pulling the casserole out of the oven and putting it in the middle of the table before sitting down in the chair next to me.

  “How has Jesse been, ya know, since Darryl died?” she asked quietly, resting her elbows on the table and leaning in closer to me. Her breath smelled stale and I backed away.

  “Okay, I guess,” I said, not wanting to share any details with her.

  “I just want to make sure he’s okay. That’s why I came back, ya know? When I heard about Darryl, I was devastated. Not at the fact that Darryl died. Wait…that sounds really tacky, huh?” she asked and I nodded. “I’ve never been known for my way with words. What I meant was, I was devastated that Jesse was alone. How’s he handlin’ it?”

  “He’s doing the best he can. Not many eighteen-year-olds have the responsibilities he does now,” I said, hoping she’d feel guilty for leaving him all those years ago, instead of stepping up and being a mother.

  “But my boy’s handlin’ it,” she said, smiling proudly. “He’s turned into quite a young man and what a looker,” she said with a low whistle. “He definitely didn’t get that from me,” she continued and all I could think was, No shit, Sherlock. “I’m a little worried though. He told me about his dad’s business and how he’s strugglin’ to run it. I think it’s just too much for him to deal with. He shouldn’t have to be dealin’ with this right now. I mean, he’s supposed to be leavin’ for college next month, not worryin’ about all this shit back here.”

  At least Marlene and I were on the same page with one thing. We both thought Jesse was dealing with too much.

  “I feel the same way,” I agreed.

  “I just wanna help him any way I can, ‘specially since I’ve been gone for so long. He’s a good boy though. Thought he’d tell me to go to hell when I showed up, but he didn’t.”

  “That’s who Jesse is,” I said softly.

  “I’m glad he has you though through all of this. He loves you very much, Riley,” she said and I suddenly didn’t find her so off-putting. Maybe she really was sorry for how she’d hurt Jesse. Maybe she really did want to step up and finally be there for her son. Maybe he hadn’t been left alone in this world after all.

  ****

  “So…what’d you think?” Jesse asked as he drove me home.

  I thought back on dinner and realized it hadn’t been so bad. Marlene had laughed and listened as Jesse told stories about his childhood and she got all gushy when Jesse recounted how he and I ended up together. I figured she’d heard it before, but Jesse seemed to enjoy telling it again, and I had to admit, I loved hearing him tell the story.

  “I think it went well.”

  “Whaddya think of her?”

  “She seems nice.”

  “That’s not very telling, Riley.”

  I sighed, and leaned against the door as I watched him drive.

  “I didn’t know what to expect. She’s definitely a little rough around the edges,” I laughed and he grinned.

  “That’s your polite way of saying she’s not exactly classy.”

  “You said it, not me.”

  “Well, it’s true. She is rough, as you put it, but other than that, what do you think?”

  “I said she’s nice.”

  “But you’re still skeptical.”

  “Yes, I am. I’m sorry, but I am.”

  “I understand your skepticism, and you may not believe me, but I’m a little skeptical too, but I think this could be good, I do.”

  I scooted over and rested my head on his shoulder as he drove. “I just want you to be happy.”

  He kissed the top of my head as he put his arm around me and I prayed he would get everything he wanted.

  Chapter Thirty

  I didn’t get a chance to talk to Matt until Jill sent us on some deliveries the next day. It was good to get out of the shop for a couple of hours and I wanted to tell him about Jesse’s mom. Even though I’d met her and Jesse seemed happy, I was still worried.

  “Jesse’s mom is back,” I blurted out as we drove, not bothering to segway into the conversation at all.

  “Excuse me?” he asked and I knew he had no idea what I was talking about.

  “While I was in Boston he called me and told me she’d just shown up. He hasn’t seen or heard anything from her since he was two.”

  “This is a good thing then, right?”

  “I don’t know. I was hoping you could tell me,” I sighed. “I mean, she just showed up out of the blue.”

  “And you question her intentions.”

  “Well, yeah, I guess. Don’t you?”

  “What do you think she wants?”

  “I don’t know,” I said quickly. “Something must be going on if she just decided to appear out of thin air.”

  “Maybe she genuinely wants to be there for her son since he lost his father,” Matt said, his words causing a feeling of guilt to enter my psyche for a moment for having doubted Marlene. It went away quickly though.

  “Maybe she doesn’t,” I answered back. />
  “What does Jesse say about all this?”

  “He’s thrilled. I haven’t seen him this happy since before his dad died. She hasn’t even been in town a week and he’s acting like she’s mother of the year,” I said, knowing I was probably exaggerating my take on the situation.

  “What’s she like?”

  “White trash,” I sneered and then winced, realizing I sounded a lot like my former self from when I’d first moved to Kansas. Matt laughed though and I shook my head.

  “I’m not surprised at that. This is southern Kansas after all,” he said and I figured it was okay to laugh since he was a native and had said it. “But despite that, do you like her?”

  “I don’t know,” I said doubtfully. “I don’t want to like her, but part of me thinks she may really want to be in Jesse’s life for the right reason. The other part of me is afraid she’ll hurt him again and I don’t think he can handle anything else right now.”

  “I can understand your concern.”

  “I just don’t know how Jesse is so accepting already.”

  “Put yourself in his place or try to anyway. What if you didn’t know your mom or dad your whole life, and then they came back, especially after the parent that had been there was gone?”

  I knew he was right. I understood Jesse’s need to have his mom fill the void of his dad. I couldn’t imagine not having a parent and if I didn’t, but then was given the chance to, I know I’d want it too, just like Jesse.

  “I take your silence as you seeing my point,” Matt said smugly.

  “Yes, I do see your point. I’d want to think my mom really wanted me.”

  “I get your worry though. It’s weird that she just showed up all of sudden, but when you think about it…maybe it’s the perfect time.”

  I hadn’t expected Matt to basically side with Jesse. I guess he wasn’t really siding with Jesse, but he was trying to get me to stop being so pessimistic and see the possible good in the situation, which was proving difficult for me to do.

  Chapter Thirty-One

  I took Matt’s words to heart and did my best to try and see the good in Marlene’s presence in Jesse’s life. It was weird though because she was always around. Before Jesse’s dad passed away, he pretty much left us alone when we’d hang out at Jesse’s house. I’d gotten used to the freedom we had at Jesse’s, but now, it seemed as if we never had any time to ourselves. Even the night we had to say goodbye to Brandon, Jesse didn’t want to stay out that late because he felt badly leaving his mother at home alone. It was frustrating, but Jesse seemed happy though and I tried to focus on that, even though I couldn’t stop questioning her motives.

  “Have you and your mom talked anymore about what her plans are?” I asked as he drove me home one night after I’d had dinner with Jesse and Marlene after work.

  “What do you mean by plans?”

  “How long is she staying?”

  “I’m not sure.”

  “Doesn’t she have a job she has to get back to or something?”

  “She’s out of work right now. She’s got a bad back or something.”

  “Really? I never would’ve guessed. She seems perfectly healthy,” I said and I knew Jesse immediately picked up on my sarcasm.

  “You shouldn’t be so judgmental, Riley.”

  “I’m not.”

  “Yes, you are. It’s very much like the Riley I met when you first moved here.”

  “That is not true,” I said defensively. “I was just making an observation.”

  “No, you weren’t. You were asking when the hell my mom is leaving town.”

  “Jesse…I…I didn’t mean that,” I said, although part of me was wondering exactly that.

  “We’re working things out,” he said and then the Jeep grew quiet. I focused my eyes on the dark road as the engine hummed.

  “Is she planning on moving to Carver?” I asked a few moments later.

  “I doubt it. Her life is back in Little Rock. She actually suggested I go with her to meet some of my family.”

  “So, she’s from there then? You mentioned she’d lived all over the Midwest.”

  “She grew up there and moved back about a year ago.”

  “So that explains her accent,” I said and he laughed.

  “Yep. She sounds like more of a hick than I do.”

  “You said it, not me,” I said and he reached over and took my hand. “So…what’d you tell her about going to Little Rock?”

  “I told her I’d think about it. I’m not sure I’m ready to make that leap yet,” he said and I felt a wave of relief as I realized Marlene hadn’t completely warped Jesse’s sensibilities. “She and I have been talking about other stuff though.”

  The tone of his voice trailed off as if he wanted to talk about it.

  “What’ve you been talking about?”

  “She thought it might be a good idea for me to sell the house.”

  “What?” I exclaimed.

  “She says if I sell the house, it would take care of a lot of things and I think she may be right.”

  “You’re not serious. You said you weren’t selling the house.”

  “Calm down, Riley. I didn’t say I was selling the house. I’ve just been thinking about it.”

  “Why are you even thinking about it? You said you didn’t want to sell right now.”

  “I don’t want to sell, but she makes some good points.”

  “Like what?”

  “Well…the money.”

  “Yeah, I get that, but when you sell the house, it should be your idea, not Marlene’s.”

  “It’s not her idea, but what else am I gonna do?”

  “You said you would find another way. I don’t want you doing anything you’ll regret. The only reason you’re even entertaining the idea is because Marlene suggested it.”

  “I wish you’d stop calling her Marlene. She’s my mom.”

  “Yeah, for like two weeks,” I jeered just as Jesse pulled the Jeep to a stop in front of my house.

  “I’m gonna pretend you didn’t say that.”

  “Why? I’m only stating the truth.”

  “Why do you hate her?” he asked, turning off the engine and turning to face me.

  “I don’t hate her.”

  “What’s your problem with her then? And don’t say because she left me when I was a baby. I’m well aware of what she did.”

  “So, you’ve just forgotten that fact?”

  “Of course I haven’t forgotten, but I have forgiven.”

  “How can you act like it’s all okay?”

  “It’s not all okay,” he said and his voice remained calmer than I expected it to. “I know she’s not perfect. I get that. I don’t need your constant reminders of it though.”

  “What constant reminders? I haven’t said anything until just now.”

  “You don’t have to say anything. I can see it all over your face whenever you’re with us.”

  I knew there was probably some truth to what he said. I never could hide how I was truly feeling. My face always gave it away.

  “I might as well be honest with you then,” I said, pausing for a moment. “I can’t forgive her for what she did to you and I can’t forget. I’m sorry if I can’t warm up to your mom like you have.”

  “Like I’ve told you, you don’t get it and you won’t get it so it’s better if you just don’t even try and understand.”

  “Jesse, please…don’t say that. I’m just looking out for you,” I said and I heard him sigh.

  “I know you are, but please, just let me handle this one. If I’m gonna make mistakes, let me make them. You can’t save me from my life, so please stop trying.”

  His voice was calm, but his words stung. I just nodded, trying to crack a smile to show I wasn’t hurt. Deep down, I knew he was right. It was his life and whatever choices he made, he’d have to live with it. It was just hard for me to accept that.

  I couldn’t say anything else because I didn’t know what el
se to say. I figured whatever came out of my mouth would just antagonize the situation. So instead, I just kissed him on the cheek, whispered, “I love you,” and got out of the Jeep.

  Chapter Thirty-Two

  “Riley! A package is here for you!” I heard my mom’s voice call up the stairs. It was late on Saturday afternoon and I was relaxing in my room, streaming a movie on my computer. Jesse was working and I was waiting for him to text me so I could hang out with him and Marlene. He told me he didn’t know how late he would be because he and Glenn were going to spend some time going over the business end of everything. I was happy he seemed to be reconnecting with his uncle. I knew the accident had been difficult for both them. Glenn still felt guilt and Jesse felt resentment, but at least they were working together more. Glenn would be good for Jesse. He was the support Jesse needed…not Marlene. I hadn’t brought her up anymore to Jesse and he hadn’t offered up any more new information. He’d said nothing else about selling the house and I didn’t know how to take that. I figured I’d just have to wait and see what he decided.

  “Be right down!” I called back, pausing the movie and heading downstairs to the kitchen.

  On the table was a large box and I knew instantly what it was. I got a knife from the drawer and cut open the package.

  “What’s in the box?” my mom asked as she chopped up some tomatoes for the salad for dinner.

  “These,” I said, holding out the contents so she could see.

  “Photo albums?” she asked, raising a curious eyebrow at me.

  “Yeah,” I said as I checked them out. “Jesse found a whole bunch of old pictures in his dad’s closet and I told him we should make some nice albums with them. I couldn’t find any at Wal-Mart so I ordered them online. I had that Amazon gift card Uncle Mike and Aunt Debbie gave me for graduation. I thought this would be a nice thing to use it on.”

  “Not something practical, like textbooks in the fall?” she said with a smirk.

  “No worries, Mother, these only cost like twenty bucks. I’ve still got some left over.”

  She put the knife down and came over, picking up one of the albums.