Still Waving

by Laurene Kelly

  Phoebe and Jasmine came back. ‘God, are you still in the queue?’

  I nodded.

  ‘Do we really want to ruin our skin and teeth with that crap?’ Phoebe asked both of us.

  ‘When you put it like that, not really.’

  Damn. I’d stood in the bloody line for nothing. I was annoyed.

  ‘You all right?’ Phoebe asked as I brushed by her.

  ‘Fine, but find another slave next time.’ I hurried into the theatre.

  I knew they looked at each other and pulled a face behind my back. I just knew it.

  The lights were still on, and only about a third of the seats were taken. After sampling a few different locations, we chose the middle seats. People talked and waved to friends. The lights dimmed and it became very dark. Advertisements burst into the darkness so loudly that I nearly jumped out of my skin. Everyone groaned in unison and lollies hit the screen as people pelted them at the ads. Lollies will be banned someday I bet. I sank down in my seat, hoping the movie would improve my mood.

  ‘Thank god that’s over!’ Phoebe said as we stepped outside into late afternoon.

  People rushed by and it seemed even noisier and hotter than before. I rubbed my eyes to adjust to the changed light. Someone bumped me and I apologised.

  ‘Why’d I blow my money on that crap movie?’ Phoebe said in disgust.

  ‘Me too,’ I agreed.

  ‘Makes you spew. We should have waited till it came out on DVD.’ Phoebe turned to me, ‘We could have pushed the stop button.’

  ‘Let’s go to Darling Harbour and hang out for a while.’ Jasmine changed the subject.

  ‘I hope you’re not too upset that it was so bad?’ I said sympathetically to Jasmine.

  ‘I hate wasting money as much as the next person.’

  ‘It was your suggestion.’ Phoebe poked Jasmine.

  ‘So?’

  ‘Next time, do the research.’

  ‘Stop it you two. We’re here.’

  I often played the peacemaker when those two started sniping. Afternoon shadows played across the boardwalk.

  ‘It’s your turn to queue.’ I turned to them both. ‘I’ll grab a table.’

  As I watched their retreating backs, I turned and studied the activity on the harbour. It was busy and it looked as if half of Sydney were here. Phoebe and Jasmine returned with my milkshake.

  ‘It’s busy.’

  ‘Tourists!’ Phoebe responded, dismissively.

  Jasmine stopped sucking her straw. ‘I’m going to be a tourist one day.’

  ‘Is that your ambition?’ Phoebe asked, laughingly.

  ‘What’s wrong with that?’ Jasmine sounded offended.

  ‘Nothing. I didn’t say anything was wrong with it.’

  ‘Don’t you want to travel?’ Jasmine asked.

  ‘I do,’ I butted in. ‘I want to surf Hawaii, Bali, everywhere.’

  ‘Go girl.’ Jasmine smiled at me. ‘I’ll come with you and carry your board when you’re famous.’

  I blushed. ‘Don’t be ridiculous. No matter how famous I get, I’ll always carry my own board.’

  They both laughed.

  ‘I met this girl surfing yesterday, who seems pretty cool.’

  ‘Why don’t you bring her to the rave on Saturday night?’ Jasmine asked while still slurping on her straw.

  Phoebe poked me. ‘You’re coming. No excuses.’

  ‘Ouch.’ I wasn’t going to bother arguing about it now. What was the point? Anything could happen by Saturday. I smiled to myself.

  ‘Peace.’ I put my two fingers up.

  ‘That’s the wrong way, smart bum.’

  ‘What? Oh sorry, I always forget the right way,’ I smirked and sipped my milkshake.

  ‘Sure and pigs fly, bubba,’ Phoebe said menacingly.

  ‘Yeah, I’ve seen that,’ Jasmine butted in. ‘It was in LA …’

  ‘You haven’t been to LA,’ Phoebe and I said at the same time. We hooked little fingers, closed our eyes and made a wish.

  ‘What did you wish?’ Jasmine asked.

  ‘Don’t change the subject and you know you can’t reveal a wish.’

  ‘Have yours ever come true?’

  ‘Jasmine, cut the BS.’ Phoebe put her glass firmly on the table.

  ‘What about you Jules?’ Jasmine ignored Phoebe.

  ‘Well, um, I don’t know.’

  ‘Jules!’ Phoebe was indignant. ‘Don’t. I repeat, don’t get sucked into that ploy to avoid explaining herself about seeing pigs fly in LA.’

  Phoebe put her right hand out and touched her pointing finger with the left hand.

  ‘One, when have you seen pigs fly? Two, what do you mean you saw it in LA, as if you were strolling down Sunset Strip or something.’

  ‘Sounds like you know LA. Have you been there?’

  ‘Was it on TV?’ I said diplomatically.

  ‘Come to think of it, it was people being cruel and horrible to pigs, doing tests with radiation or something. I don’t want to talk about it anymore.’ Jasmine looked away.

  Phoebe and I were stunned. A minute ago Jasmine was joking and now she had tears in her eyes. What did we do? Phoebe and I looked at each other and shrugged our shoulders.

  ‘Jasmine, are you all right?’ I said gently touching her shoulder.

  Jasmine didn’t respond at first.

  ‘I sort of got a flashback of the pigs, and then I started thinking about orangutans and gorillas, which led to elephants, get the picture? I think its hormonal, no big deal,’ Jasmine said, shrugging her shoulders.

  ‘Don’t start me up.’ I meant it.

  ‘Come on you two, don’t get down,’ Phoebe cajoled.

  ‘What’s not to get depressed about?’ Jasmine challenged.

  ‘The sky, the water, we’re alive, we’re young.’ Phoebe spread her arms out.

  ‘Did you hear that on an ad for tampons?’ Jasmine responded, cynically.

  I was relieved. Jasmine had shaken her mood.

  ‘Optimism is my New Year’s resolution for the Chinese New Year in a couple of weeks,’ I told them, a bit embarrassed in case they thought I was being dumb.

  ‘You’re not Chinese.’

  ‘It doesn’t matter. I like their New Year better than our boring Auld Lang Syne and everyone passing on herpes at midnight. I identify more with how the Chinese go about New Year celebrations.’ I sounded so experienced on world matters, I even impressed myself.

  ‘I like that each New Year is an animal,’ Phoebe said.

  ‘Maybe when I become a tourist, I’ll be able to work my itinerary so I have New Years all over the world.’

  ‘Sounds cool. Can I borrow your phone Phoebe? I want to ring Kate, and let her know it doesn’t look like I’ll be back in time to surf.’

  ‘Why am I the only one with a mobile? You better be quick. Mum’s been on and on at me about the bloody bill.’

  Phoebe handed me the phone. I was half expecting a message bank when Kate answered.

  ‘Oh, hi. I was just rehearsing my message.’

  ‘Jules.’

  ‘Yeah I’m still in the city and if I catch a bus now I might get there in a couple of hours. Four million people want to leave the city at the same time. It’s the chaos theory in practice.’

  ‘Don’t sweat, there’s no wind. I’m on the balcony and there’s no sign of surf. Hold on, maybe at Maroubra.’

  I laughed. Phoebe and Jasmine looked at me.

  ‘I’m on Phoebe’s mobile. Can’t talk. I’ll call you when I get home.’

  ‘Cool. How was the movie?’

  ‘Crap, you’re lucky you had the housework to do,’ I laughed.

  ‘I’m so lucky,’ Kate sang. ‘Catch you later, captain.’

  ‘Don’t call me that. See you.’ I hung up.

  Phoebe and Jasmine were staring at me, expectantly.

  ‘What?’

  They looked at each other.

  ‘Do you mind if I ring my aunt?’ I asked Phoebe.


  ‘Bloody hell! Why don’t you ring America while you’re at it? Go on.’

  The phone rang and rang. It was finally answered by the machine. Aunt Jean wasn’t there. I left a convoluted message.

  ‘I better head home.’ I finished the last of my milkshake with a noisy slurp.

  ‘Me too. I can’t afford to hang around here.’ Phoebe stood up.

  ‘Stay if you want. I don’t care.’

  ‘Hear that, Jasmine? She doesn’t care about her friends.’

  ‘I didn’t mean that,’ I spluttered.

  ‘Are we your best friends?’ Phoebe put her arm around Jasmine.

  ‘Of course you are.’

  ‘Well what are friends for?’

  ‘To lend money,’ Jasmine said.

  Phoebe hit her on the arm.

  ‘Ouch. You’re so violent. I’m serious, I can’t pay for this.’

  ‘Jasmine!’ Phoebe sounded irate.

  ‘I’ll pay you back.’

  ‘I can’t believe you come out, order milkshake and cake and you haven’t got any money, but don’t say a thing.’

  ‘I said I’ll pay you back.’

  ‘When?’ Phoebe glared.

  ‘Next week or something.’

  ‘It’s the something that bothers me.’

  ‘Next week.’

  ‘Forget it. I’ll buy you the bloody things.’

  Jasmine gave Phoebe a big hug. ‘You’re just a beautiful person underneath that mean crust, aren’t you sweetie.’

  I thought Phoebe was going to hit Jasmine.

  ‘Phoebe, cool it. People are watching and there’s a cop over there. Don’t hit her.’ I meant it. I didn’t want to see Phoebe punch Jasmine out of frustration.

  ‘I wouldn’t want to smack someone who obviously already has serious brain damage.’

  Jasmine looked perplexed. I don’t think she was quite sure if Phoebe really was going to hit her.

  ‘Chill out everyone. It’s got a bit too heavy.’ I shook my hands.

  ‘Let’s go.’ Phoebe put her hand out for my money. I gave her the right amount for my share. Jasmine grabbed the serviette and the uneaten cake from our plates.

  ‘Do you think I went too far?’ Jasmine whispered to me.

  ‘A little bit.’

  ‘I guess so. I would’ve paid her back you know.’

  ‘I know, but I don’t think that was the point.’

  ‘What? Ssshh,’ Jasmine uttered as Phoebe rejoined us.

  We dawdled our way through Chinatown to Belmore Park. The major part of the rush was over. The smoky haze suspended the light in a sullen sky. There were no shadows cast from buildings, just an unnatural glare. Once all the workers shut up their offices and went home, the buildings quietly had a rest from the hub of the day.

  Walking through the park towards the bus stop, I tried not to look anyone in the eye. It was dangerous. An old bloke who needed a bath last year, staggered up to me.

  ‘Give us a cigarette, love?’

  ‘Don’t smoke,’ I replied and walked faster.

  ‘Good on you love. Don’t take it up, it’s a filthy habit.’

  The man staggered off towards a group of men and women sitting around a bench. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a group passing around bottles in paper bags. I wondered if this is where Dad would have been if we’d lived in the city?

  A man stood up, shouting at the others. I closed my eyes. Why can’t I see beauty instead of ugliness? I opened my eyes and saw that this part of the world appeared devoid of beauty and was truly ugly. I looked up at the sky and imagined seagulls hovering above. The beach, I thought. I wish I was at the beach. A splat landed in front of me. The seagulls were real. How stupid was that? Jasmine and Phoebe seemed oblivious to their surroundings. They talked on and on about the rave on Saturday night.

  There was a throng of people waiting at the bus stop. I bought a ticket from the ticket seller who was grumpy and flustered.

  The bus was crowded. I couldn’t help overhearing the conversations around me. Every person and their dog talked about the heat and the bushfires. I heard seven hundred different opinions on whether it was going to rain or not. I turned away from this guy with really bad breath in my face. A woman was knitting. Can you believe that? A hundred and fifty degrees on this bus and this woman is knitting what looks like a baby jumper. The bus is bouncing around, people fall all over the place and this woman knits calmly. I try to attract Phoebe and Jasmine’s attention, further up the bus. It’s impossible. They’re both squashed, facing the other way.

  As we got nearer to our destination, the bus slowly emptied. We grabbed the back seat.

  ‘We’ve got to get a licence and a car,’ Phoebe said.

  ‘You’d be best,’ Jasmine said prodding me.

  ‘Why me?’

  ‘You’ve lived on a farm with machinery and things.’

  Phoebe and I looked at each other.

  ‘What’s that got to do with it?’ I asked.

  ‘Everyone knows kids on farms learn to drive cars early. Everyone gets a paddock bomb.’

  I was amazed that everyone knew this, because I sure didn’t.

  ‘Can you drive?’ Phoebe asked me.

  ‘W … well sort of,’ I answered.

  ‘You either do or you don’t,’ Jasmine said.

  ‘Well yes, but I’ve never driven anywhere near a city, and I don’t think you’d want to be my passengers in this traffic.’

  ‘It’s gotta be done,’ Phoebe said. ‘We have to travel in style without having the smell of humanity making you want to vomit. I’m sick of practically choking to death on disease-ridden public transport.’

  Jasmine did an imitation of Phoebe choking.

  ‘I can’t afford driving lessons, and anyway, all I want to do is surf.’

  ‘Look, we’ve told you before, this surfing thing’s all right, but you can’t let it rule your life.’ Phoebe gave me her most serious look.

  ‘It does.’ I laughed back.

  ‘Jules, you’ve got to do other things, have other interests.’

  ‘You sound like my aunt.’

  ‘Shut up. You know what I’m saying; anyway you’ll have to ask your aunt to take you for driving lessons, till you’re good enough to get your licence.’

  ‘What about you?’ I asked Phoebe.

  ‘I’m too busy and besides I want to be the navigator.’

  ‘I want to be the interior decorator,’ Jasmine said.

  We laughed.

  ‘No dice,’ Phoebe and I said together. Once again we did our linking finger ritual.

  ‘How come I never get to make one of those dumb wishes?’

  ‘Because everything you say is original, darling.’ Phoebe patted Jasmine’s head. ‘No one else on this whole planet, or from any other galaxy, would say the same thing as you.’

  ‘I’ll take that as a compliment.’

  ‘I think that would be for the best,’ I said, smiling over Jasmine’s head at Phoebe.

  I pulled the stop cord. Peering out at the water, I noticed there was a slight swell. A few surfers were visible, more in hope than anything, I thought. I’d give it another hour or so to see if it picked up.

  We walked up the street to my place. At the top of the stairs, I listened. I couldn’t hear anything. I opened the front door. It was still quiet. I wondered if Aunt Jean was home. She was sitting at the little table on the balcony.

  ‘Hello Phoebe and Jasmine. Nice to see you again,’ Aunt Jean said. ‘Would you like a drink or something to eat?’

  ‘Yes thanks,’ Jasmine answered. Phoebe nudged her.

  ‘I’ll make a pot of tea.’ I put the kettle on and got out some cups.

  ‘No it’s all right, we don’t want anything.’

  ‘I want a cup of tea. It will relax me after the arduous journey on the bus.’ Jasmine was being stubborn.

  Phoebe and I looked at each other. It was obvious Aunt Jean had been crying. I shrugged my shoulders.

 
‘Are you all right?’ I asked quietly.

  ‘I’m okay. I’ve just had a bit of a scare. I’ll tell you about it later. Don’t worry.’

  ‘What’s happened? Dad hasn’t escaped, has he?’ I became alarmed.

  ‘No, Julie, nothing like that. Calm down. We’ll talk when your friends have gone.’

  ‘Is Toby all right?’ I felt desperate. If anything had happened to him … I’d … I’d just …

  ‘He’s fine. Look, make it short with your friends. I’ll be up on the roof.’

  I watched Aunt Jean leave the flat.

  Phoebe and Jasmine looked at me expectantly.

  ‘Who knows? Aunt Jean seems to be acting a bit dramatically. She wouldn’t tell me anything, just hinting something was up. I hate that. How everything is made into a big mystery.’

  ‘You want us to go?’

  ‘No it’s cool. Have a drink.’

  We talked about the movie again. Phoebe picked up our empty cups and took them to the sink.

  ‘Don’t worry about that. I’ll do it later.’

  ‘Now you’re coming Saturday night even if you’ve got rabies.’ Phoebe twisted my arm up my back. It didn’t hurt much, it was just pretend.

  ‘I’ll see.’

  ‘Not good enough, my friend,’ Jasmine butted in. ‘You must come. That’s an order.’

  ‘All right, all right, I surrender.’ I put my hands on top of my head like a prisoner of war.

  I walked them downstairs to the front door.

  ‘I’ll ring you tomorrow,’ I said as I waved them goodbye. I was still waving when one of my neighbours walked by.

  ‘You waving at me?’ he said, smiling.

  ‘No.’ How embarrassing.

  I raced up the stairs two at a time, feeling a bit apprehensive about Aunt Jean. I made another pot of tea, got the tray and cups. I carried the tray, concentrating so I didn’t spill any. I put the tray down to open the roof door. I held it open with my leg which was quite tricky. I rattled my way through, watching the vibration of the cups with trepidation.