Fractured Refuge

by Annabelle McInnes

  He was momentarily blinded when Euan mirrored the smile. His teeth visible though his thick beard. Brown eyes sparked with something akin to mischief and a calloused hand lifted to point at Kira.

  Nick’s focus was riveted on that hand. ‘Her, naked. You, naked. Now.’

  He lifted his gaze and he looked up at the big man through blond lashes.

  Euan growled.

  The primal sound reverberated in Nick’s chest. A swallow tried to dislodge the thickness in his throat. Words were beyond him, thought was impossible. Thick, solid fingers were at his chin and his face was being redirected.

  Darkness was overcome by light. Molten molasses was consumed by cobalt blue. Bronze skin clothed in dark fatigues was subsumed by long limbs encased in alabaster. He heard a deep male chuckle at his back as his excitement fizzed. A halo of sunshine surrounded her face, her eyes were wide and brimmed with expectation, high cheekbones were flushed a glorious shade of pink. Thighs as white as milk were spread and open. Her muscles quivered, inviting him in.

  Something was said—codes to nuclear warheads, the cure for the plague, how to light a match—nothing registered. There was not a thing in this world that would distract his focus from the goddess on the bed. That was until his ass was given a painful smack, hard enough to make him grunt and pull his body out of his stupor and take the two steps needed to reach the bed.

  ‘That man is a fucking god,’ he mumbled to the grinning woman. ‘No human can think with you looking like that.’

  Kira’s lips parted and her little tongue escaped to wet the plump flesh. Her giggle at his loss of cognisance made him match her smile with one of his own.

  ‘I’m going to devour you, Pixie-Pie.’

  Her grin brightened, and her delicate throat swallowed in answer. She spread her knees farther apart.

  Nick moved without his conscious thought, drawn to her as though he was a siren. A maid who sang songs to pull him in, only to watch him crash and burn. He fell to his knees when he reached the bed.

  ‘You gonna be good for me this time?’

  Kira’s lips tipped up with a tiny, impish grin. She shrugged, a delicate move that had Nick reach out to hold her narrow ankles. His thumb traced bone, muscle and fine, invisible hairs.

  His grin turned wicked.

  Kira’s attention was riveted on his hands as reached out and unclasped her shorts. The zip was slow to follow, each opening tooth a foreboding crunch that mingled with their escalated breaths. The vision of worn, pale yellow cotton panties was the reward for his efforts. He inhaled, relishing the scent of aroused woman, and pulled at the fabric until the garment was drawn down her legs.

  Her socks came with them and before he could take another breath, their girl was dressed in nothing but a t-shirt and panties.

  Nick trapped the air in his lungs and simply enjoyed the vision.

  She trembled in front of him, her body ripe with desire. Her intoxicating feminine musk filled his nostrils. The vision of her lithe, graceful body overwhelmed his senses. Regardless of what was between her legs, he’d been right the moment he first laid eyes on her. She was perfect, and Nick loved her just as much as he loved Euan.

  He swallowed, reached out, just as Euan re-entered the room.

  ‘Too overwhelmed by our girl to get your shit together?’

  Nick somehow found the ability to laugh, and Kira smiled. ‘Gotta say, she floors me every time. How you’re still walking is beyond me.’

  Euan grunted and it was then that Nick realised he’d brought one of the mahogany chairs from the living room into the bedroom with him. The door was closed with an ominous click and Euan sat with all the sure intent of a king ready to appraise his lands, to issue orders to his thrall. Brown eyes turned midnight.

  ‘Not gonna ask again.’

  Kira began to pull her shirt over her head. Nick made a move to rise as he fumbled to unfasten his pants.

  His fingers froze when Euan spoke again. ‘Stay on your knees. Right where you are. I’ve changed my mind.’

  Nick’s focus was riveted as Euan rose to his feet. His boots created heavy imprints in the carpet. His bulky body consumed the limited space left in the room.

  Euan’s long fingers began to unfasten his pants. A slow, deliberate step was taken in Nick’s direction. On the bed, Kira arched her spine in anticipation, her nipples tiny points that pushed through the thin cloth of her bra. Euan’s sharp words put an immediate halt to her actions. ‘You, stay still. Both of you are in trouble tonight. You are gonna watch, but you are not gonna enjoy. I’ll tell you when can move, touch yourself, come. Feel me?’

  On the bed, Kira swallowed as the atmosphere in the room sharpened to a razor’s edge. A flash of indignation had her lift her pointed chin. Euan simply raised a single dark eyebrow. Kira’s gasps for air became the only noise in the room.

  Nick held his breath in his chest as Euan’s steady fingers finished drawing down his zipper. His focus was absorbed by thick thighs and a trim waist encased in dark fatigues. His lips parted when the waterproof fabric was forced low on his hips. Soon, both pants and briefs were gone, and the epitome of masculinity and virility overtook his vision.

  His mind turned blank, his mouth watered. Nick’s body vibrated with the anticipation, his muscles tight with expectation and determination. His own erection was painfully trapped behind the fabric of his pants. On his knees, there was no other option other than to lick his lips and wait.

  It had been so long since they had last done this. The poignant wait was eternal. Flashes of memories tried to intrude on the precious moment, the reason why such delays had been necessary. Nick forced them back from his consciousness into the nothingness where they belonged.

  ‘Open up, Nicky,’ Euan rumbled, his voice deep with desire and lust. ‘Gonna fuck your face. Kira, you’re gonna watch. Eyes on me, on this, yeah?’

  Nick risked a glance to the living fairy on the bed. Her mouth was open, focus snagged. Her tiny hands were fisted in the bedding at her hips. Her eyes were midnight blue in the limited light.

  Euan used one large palm to refocus Nick back to the matter at hand. He cupped his jaw, ran thick yet tender fingers through his hair, affectionately stroked the shell of his ear. The dichotomy between Euan’s demands and his gentle regard made Nick’s throat thick with emotion. The raw edge of his beautiful moment hard won.

  ‘Open up,’ came the order. A thumb to his lips to prompt the demand, Nick closed his eyes and obeyed.

  The warmth of soft skin was the first sensation. A gentle rounded shape nudged Nick’s parted lips. He opened his mouth wider as Euan’s glorious cock pushed its way forward, as velvet flesh surged and pulsed.

  The room vibrated with a guttural groan of satisfaction and thankful desire. Nick’s tongue licked the underside of Euan’s erection, tasted the musk that overwhelmed his senses. When Euan pulled back reluctantly, Nick laved his lips in copious amounts of saliva to ease the way.

  Nick loved this. Adored it. And in that moment, he realised how much he’d missed it. Euan’s cock was heavy and long. A slight curl towards his belly. His ball sac was weighty, hanging low as Euan entered Nick’s mouth again. His cock was nestled in a tangled nest of dark hair, and when Euan pushed forward, Nick relaxed his throat until his nose pressed into the entwined curls.

  ‘Christ,’ Euan swore as he withdrew. Nick sucked every inch, hollowed his cheeks and savoured the associated vocal curses and grunts.

  The smell of Euan’s arousal was powerful. It always had been. The deep, heady scent of aroused male. It affected him like a drug. When Euan had let Nick do this for the first time, it had been that irresistible scent that had solidified the decision in Nick’s mind that he would never need to suck another man’s cock for the rest of his life.

  Except in those two days of hell …

  There was a surge of memory that made Nick flinch. It came at him with the ferocity of an avalanche, giving him no opportunity to fight its consuming onslaught.

>   The acute sting from lips that were torn and stretched. The stink of unwashed flesh. Obscured vision through swollen eyes. The ring in his ears from numerous blows to the head. The taste of blood …

  When Euan pushed forward enough that he pressed on the back of Nick’s throat, instead of relaxing, he gagged. Euan’s scent morphed into something putrid, the sensation of sanctuary shifted into one of threats, of further brutalisation if he didn’t do as he was told.

  Nick tried to not to recoil, attempted not to retch, but the memories overpowered him, devoured him. He gagged again, even as Euan pulled out of his mouth to offer words of comfort. Large palms cupped his jaw, fingers threaded through his hair. Nick couldn’t understand why there were no snarls in the locks, no bloody abrasions, the strands were not tender after being pulled to the point of hair loss …

  A deep rumble fought through the blackness. ‘Nicky, come back to me. Open your eyes. It was just me.’

  Nick cracked open his eyelids to find not the grey slivers of evil, but the warm, loving iris of molten molasses.

  ‘Euan?’ he croaked past the memories that still swirled inside his head.

  ‘Yeah,’ Euan murmured in relieved reply, his brow creased with worry. ‘You back with me?’

  Nick swallowed, tried to shake his head but found it was still encased in the warm hands of the man who engulfed his vision. ‘I,’ he coughed. ‘I think so.’

  ‘Flashback?’ Euan asked quietly.

  Nick couldn’t hold the unflinching gaze. ‘I’m sorry, I was enjoying it.’

  ‘Look at me.’ The demand was firm.

  The tone that was used snapped Nick out of his reprieve. He opened his eyes.

  Euan’s gaze was laced with compassion and understanding. ‘You got nothing to be sorry for.’

  When Nick tried to interject, Euan shook his head, a flinch in his jaw. ‘I mean it. I fucked up. Didn’t read the signs, too overwhelmed by the look in your eyes. I know you were into it. But just not ready for it, yeah?’

  Nick’s whole body shuddered. ‘I thought I was …’

  ‘I know.’

  An intrinsic part of him forced his focus to break from Euan to turn back to the bed. Kira sat perched on the edge of the mattress, elbows on her knees as she leant forward. Her delicate feet curled into the carpet at his knees. She was poised to jump in and embrace him, and when Euan gave the grunt of assent, she threw herself off the bed and into Nick’s waiting arms.

  ‘Nicky …’ she whispered into his throat.

  The scent of lavender and innocence that bombarded his senses removed the last of the memories that clawed at his mind. Her sweet essence dislodged the sharp points, but even as they disappeared, tears in the fabric of his soul remained.

  He cupped the back of her skull; his fingers buried themselves in spun gold. His lips pressed against her temple. ‘I thought I’d moved past all this.’

  It took courage to find Euan’s gaze. The brown of his eyes had melted, and a resigned understanding washed through his features. ‘I’d say its gonna take more time,’ he told him carefully. ‘Especially when we do things that trigger it.’

  Nick inhaled. Kira’s eyelashes fluttered against the skin at his throat like butterflies. He remained silent.

  Euan’s tone was resolute. ‘This isn’t a race. We got nowhere we gotta be. We’re all feeling this road together. You take months to enjoy that with me again, years; fuck, even if it never happens. There is no load on you that you gotta carry, gotta push through.’

  ‘I wanted to do it,’ Nick interjected.

  ‘I know you did,’ came the compassionate answer. ‘But some part of you isn’t ready. Which means all of you isn’t ready.’

  He thought briefly how fascinating the concept of sexuality was when there was no society to tell a man how he had to be.

  Nick grunted, and even though he still held Kira in his arms, her insignificant weight meant he was able to lift her with him as he pushed to his feet. She wrapped her legs around his middle. She remained still in his arms. He held on a little tighter, cherished the body that pressed against him.

  ‘I don’t want you to be careful,’ Nick grumbled. ‘I don’t want you to hold back.’

  Euan’s dark eyes were now fortified with compassion, and that made Nick even more irate.

  He bent until he could place Kira back on the mattress. It took her a moment to let go, but eventually she did and before he moved out of her grasp, he ran his fingers through her wild hair in a soft, reassuring caress.

  ‘I need some air,’ he told them as he turned to the door, but Euan was in his way.

  ‘Remember the first time you let me suck your cock?’

  Nick jerked to a halt. He heard Kira hiccup. He narrowed his eyes at big giant blocking his path.

  ‘I was so fucking scared; did you know that? It terrified me,’ Euan confessed. ‘We’d kissed, yeah, and you’d done it to me, but letting another man put his dick in my mouth, on purpose?’ A hard laugh. ‘I wanted it, craved it, but I was afraid. Remember what you said to me?’

  Nick shook his head. But he did remember, he just wasn’t courageous enough to say it.

  Euan didn’t feel the same. ‘You told me what was between our legs didn’t mean shit anymore. It was about people. And making people feel good. And that could happen however we wanted it too. It didn’t matter why or how, all that mattered was that we wanted it. And we wanted each other.’

  ‘That’s a little too cohesive to sound like me with my dick a near your mouth,’ Nick muttered.

  Euan’s lips kicked up. ‘You were trying to impress me.’

  ‘That’d be about right.’ Nick mumbled belligerently, before he tried to pass Euan once more.

  ‘Nicky,’ came the warning tone.

  Nick halted, took a deep breath and face-planted into Euan’s chest. He buried himself into the larger man and wrapped his arms around his middle. Euan reciprocated and squeezed. ‘I’m sorry, big man.’

  ‘Nothing to be sorry for, kid. You’re not ready, so we’ll take it slow. You can watch Kira suck me off instead.’

  Nick couldn’t help the burst of humour that erupted free. He laughed into the crook of Euan’s shoulder. ‘I can do that.’

  ‘Good, cause my dick is still hanging outside my fucking pants.’

  Nick laughed harder, and gripped Euan tighter.

  Chapter 8

  Euan stared at the ceiling.

  They’d gone to bed shortly after Nick’s episode, unfulfilled yet content. There had been an unspoken end to their antics, and though Euan could tell that Nick was disappointed, both Kira and himself shared the same concerns, and had feigned tiredness over gratification.

  Nick had taken longer than usual to fall into respite, but eventually his breathing had slowed, and his snoring had commenced. Kira, on the other hand, remained motionless, wrapped around his body as she clung to him while Nick slept on his back on her opposing side.

  ‘You still awake?’ she whispered into the darkness.

  ‘Yeah sweetheart,’ Euan murmured in reply.

  Her hand trailed down his bare chest, her tentative fingers brushed through his coarse chest hair. ‘Are you all right?’

  Euan took the time to enjoy the beauty of her touch, the wonder that her fingers wrapped around him. The splendour she provided as his heart was encased in a wreath of tender perfection. ‘I will be,’ he answered truthfully.

  Nick’s rumbling snore vibrated through them. When she finally spoke, her voice was uncertain, hesitant. ‘Are we going to be all right?’

  Euan turned until he faced her. In the dark, his hand found her cheek, his thumb ran over the rise of the delicate bone underneath her soft skin. When his thumb touched her lush bottom lip, he pressed forward and forced the pad down over the pillowed flesh to scrape along her teeth. The wet tip of her tongue touched his invasion, an inviting hint that caused a slight twitch of his lips. He pressed further. She wrapped her lips around his appendage and sucked. She slowly b
uilt the pressure until Euan couldn’t help the growl of appreciation in his chest.

  She bit, hard. He chuckled.

  At the sound of his quiet mirth, she wiggled up his body. She pushed herself further into his space until their noses touched, their breath intermingled.

  He removed his thumb from the warm recesses of her mouth with a muted wet pop, and replaced the pressure with his lips. ‘Always, baby,’ he answered her concern with sincere veneration.

  ‘I’m worried.’ Her lips slid against his, the saliva he’d drawn from her mouth created a slick surface. It heightened his senses; his nerve endings adored the succulent sensation.

  At the sound of her genuine concern, reality burned the veil of gossamer he’d wrapped around himself. He was careful to make his movements unnoticeable, but slowly, he enfolded her in his arms. He dragged her close until she was lying on top of him, their bodies flush against one another. Legs were entangled. Breast to chest, stomach to stomach, heart to heart.

  ‘I know,’ he murmured with no attempt to offer any platitudes. They would be a lie, and she would know it. He moved both hands until they were buried in her hair, the glorious spun gold that was impossible to finger comb due to the knotted waves. The shroud dissolved further.

  Kira snuggled her face into the dip between his pectoral muscles, inhaled deeply before she murmured, ‘Something terrible happened to that girl, didn’t it?’

  Euan nodded, and with his affirmation, Kira tightened her embrace.

  ‘Was it the man with her?’ she asked hesitantly.

  He slipped his hand under her nightdress and trailed his fingers down her spine. Her skin flared in his wake. Her tiny hairs rose like soldiers in the presence of their general. ‘Doubt it,’ he told her. ‘But it doesn’t mean he wasn’t involved. I want you nowhere near him, hear me?’