Lyfe Changing

by Desirae Williams

  I nearly choked on my drink knowing my grandmother could be a little crude at times. “Grandma really?” I said shaking my head. “What… you know I’m telling the truth…so what are the terms of your probation?” I finished gnawing on a piece of chicken and wiped my hands. “Check in every two weeks, home by nine, and community service.” “Community service, what are you gonna be doing? Picking up trash and stuff like that?” She asked. I nodded. “I guess…” Grandma sipped on her ice tea and nodded. “Well I’m not happy about the circumstance but I’m glad you here baby...” I smiled at her. “I’m glad to be here too.”

  8

  I remember you

  Destiny

  “Damn girl, I can’t believe you went through all of that? Talk about crazy.” Cat looked at me in shock, not believing the story I had just laid on her. She scrunched up her face in confusion causing her looks to falter, which was hard for her to do because she had always been very attractive. With cocoa brown skin and a banging body, she had looks that could cause priest to lust. My girls were at my condo discussing the details of what had occurred over the past two weeks. I decided to give them the lowdown about the accident mainly because if they found out from somebody else it would be hell to pay…and that was the last thing I needed right now. I started the story from top to bottom leaving nothing out then gave them enough time to digest it all. “I know right…” Lucy said looking at me in disbelief and she being my eldest friend knew me better than anyone. “So you really dragged him out of the car before it exploded?”

  I watched the worry appear on her deep brown face as she pulled her beautiful curly hair back that I had always admired. “Yeah...crazy enough I did.” I sighed, sipping on some much needed wine as I recollected on the past events. “I don’t know how…but I’m glad I did.” “I bet he is too…” Cat chuckled. “Do you know if he is he ok?”

  I started to think about Derrick and the last time I saw him…how in shock he was. “From what I heard he was recovering fine.” Alayah eyed me for a moment then eased back on the couch, moving her long brown hair away from her light brown eyes, bringing attention to her beautiful face. “Aint he jail bird now…” I shot her a stern looking like she didn’t have to say that. “What? Just asking…” Alayah laughed nervously. “He was on trial wasn’t he?”

  I shook my head as if I were clueless to the situation. “I don’t know anything about that…” “Really?” Cat eyed me suspiciously not buying my naivety. “Well…” Meg chimed in. “I heard through the grapevine that he got probation and community service.” Her emerald green eyes were filled with interest. She stood about 5’9, curly blondish hair, with a smooth olive skin tone. She was the closest thing to a model I had ever seen before, why she chose to work behind the scenes I will never know. “I did too…” Lucy nodded.

  Avoiding eye contact with them I refused to admit any guilt. “Well that’s good to know…” They all broke out in laughter. “What?” I exclaimed. “Come off it Destiny, we know you helped get him off….the trial that is.” Cat laughed some more. “I didn’t have anything to do with that…” I defended myself. “Oh…so you didn’t send Matthew Pierce to assist him?” Alayah asked already knowing the answer since he worked at the firm with her. I stood up and glided over to the counter for some snacks. “So maybe I made a phone call…and sent somebody over to help him out so what?” I admitted. They all snickered and through shady looks at each other. “Alright…alright.” Lucy calmed everyone down. “So we all know you did it. Now the real question is why?” They all grew silent waiting for my answer. “I felt bad…I mean he was still in the hospital and was about to go to jail…I felt bad.” I’m glad I was able to help him. I thought. Hopefully now he could be able to move on with his life.

  “Hmmm…” Meg nodded. “One might think you may have feelings for him.” I laughed at her and shook my head. “Feelings for him…I don’t even know him?” She waved her hands up not meaning to be accusing. “I’m just saying, you are sure going out of your way for a man you really don’t know.” I looked at their disapproving glares and was in disbelief. “Look, the man was in an accident and I helped him out…he was going to jail so I helped him out again, that’s it… end of story.” I said putting my foot down and sipping on some more wine…damn these hefas. They all nodded and winked at each other. “Great Destiny…” Cat said raising her glass to me. “Nice speech…So have you convinced yourself yet?”

  I glared at her not wanting to hear anything more about this… but I had to admit that they were probably right. I thought about Derrick constantly more than I should and I didn’t know why… it was bugging the hell out of me. I sat on the couch and plopped back against the cushions. “Ok…Ok…I think I like him. Why I don’t know? It just keeps gnawing at me.” They all looked toward me. “I think the accident kind of made you bond to him in away…I mean you did save his life.” Lucy finally spoke up. “Yeah I guess.” That accident really changed a lot for me and I constantly thought about it. What if I didn’t come home that night? What if I didn’t stop? What if I didn’t pull him out of the car? It plagued me constantly and I didn’t know how to subside it. “I agree...” Meg patted my shoulder. “I think there will forever be a bond between you two because of the accident and what you did for him.”

  “Oh she wants to bond with him alright...” Alayah chuckled and we all fell into laughter. I looked at her in disbelief. “Why do I ask your crazy ass anything?” She took a sip of wine and smiled. “Because I speak the truth…when these hefas won’t.” We all continued to laugh. I smiled in the midst of it all; it felt good to laugh after all this stress I had been dealing with. I didn’t know what to do about the Derrick situation…quite frankly there was nothing to do. He was fine. So was I. I’ll leave it at that…for now.

  Derrick

  I wiped sweat off my forehead as I stood in the dry heat; I wasn’t even home a good week before my grandmother put me to work as usual. If I wasn’t working on the car, I was cleaning the gutters, If wasn’t raking the yard, I was tiling the roof and today I was pulling weeds from her garden. I didn’t even complain anymore, I figured if I was going to live like a slave I might as well work like one. I am supposed to meet up with my probation officer soon to get started with my community service.

  I had no idea what I was going to be doing but I figured it would be some regular yard work such as what I was doing right now… so why not get a head start. I took a couple of breathes feeling a little tired pulling all these weeds and everything. It had been a while since the accident and I was getting around much better than before but I still had my weak moments. I pulled my hair back into a tight ponytail trying to deflect anymore heat coming my way, cause Lord knows I felt like I was cooking out here. “You need something to drink out there boy?” Grandma yelled from the back door. She was wearing her green pantsuit and apron which she always wore when she was cleaning up the house. I shook my head and laughed as sweat rolled down my back. “Naw grandma… drinking my spit is doing me just fine.” She gave me a stern look, the same look that I got a lot when I was a kid back in the day when I thought I could get smart with adults.

  “Don’t get smart now…you’ll end up dying of thirst out there.” She returned back into the house and I crotched back down on the ground to finish the job. I managed to keep myself busy and not think about my drastic downfall from the good life. I still sat up at night and thought about how I lost so much…most importantly, I thought about how to get back. I had been rippin and runnin since high school collecting dough, I had stacked up so much money over a twelve year period I didn’t know what to do with it. Money flew out of my hands like rice on a wedding day, splurging on anything and everything I wanted…until the feds finally got me.

  So after all that had work I had put in for all those years, taking care of my family, buying cars, my house, I was now reduce to pennies on the corner and living with my grandmother…damn I fell off. Things had been so confusing since the accident which made it ha
rd for me to get a decent grip on reality. It was hard for me to accept the fact that I wasn’t the big baller I used to be. “Here drink this…” I looked up to see grandma handing me a big jug of ice water. “Oh grandma you shouldn’t have…” I said sarcastically while taking the jug. She rolled eyes and looked over at me. “You just make sure you get them weeds around my tomatoes ok…” I nodded. “No doubt.” I continued to tug on weeds in the yard while she watched over me. I noticed her staring and looked up at her oddly. “What’s wrong?” She shook her head and smiled at me faintly. “Nothing, you just look so much like your grandfather right now…”

  I sensed a bit of sadness in her eyes when she said that. I noticed that a lot during my growing up over the years. Grandpa Jacob had been dead for some time now and grandma still had not seemed to be over it. He grew up in New York, being part of the few Native American families in the Bronx. Grandpa Jacob was a hardworking man who started up his own corner store when he and grandma got married…which was well known around the way. I still remember the look on her face when the police came to our door that night. They informed us that grandpa had been shot in a robbery at the family store and died on the spot. Even with all this time passing, I could still remember seeing my grandmother’s spirit break that day into a shell of a person.

  After a while I guess she grew to except his death as one of Gods mysterious and moved on…but never really had she let go. I gave her a warm smile too break her away from her painful thoughts. “C’mon grandma…even on my worst day that man couldn’t hold a match let a long a candle to me.” She laughed and twisted up her face.

  “Oh please….you really think you hot stuff huh?” I shrugged not caring to show any modesty. “Well the ladies aint complaining.” Her face changed, it was still playful and yet serious as if it held some type of underlying message she wanted me to know. “You can have all the beautiful women in the world Derrick but beauty fades son…you gone have to start looking for more than just a pretty face…you need something more solid than that…something that’s gonna hold you and keep you grounded” I sighed while wiping dirt on my jeans. “Trust me grandma in this day in time finding somebody like that will be like finding Noah’s ark…impossible.” She laughed at me and shook her head. “No not really…if you know what you’re looking for…and sometimes you don’t even have to look for it, it’ll find you.” I stood up and used my t shirt to wipe sweat off of my forehead not really paying her any mind.

  See what my Grandmother didn’t realize is that times were not like they used to be…where your woman stuck by you through thick and thin regardless of anything else. These days and times if you weren’t rolling in anything less than a Porsche these tricks didn’t even see you…and thanks to divine intervention my funds can’t even get me a Buick. Naw, I thought. Aint nobody out there for me. “Hey grandma… these weeds would be a lot easier to deal with if we had some weed killer?” I said eying all the vegetables she had in the garden and not trying to work myself to death. She shook her head. “See that’s what’s wrong with you young boys…too cute and pretty to get your hands dirty.”

  I waved her off. “Old woman you aint abut to kill me out here in this heat…working like a mule.” “Oh please…you look like you are already done.” She pointed at the finished garden. I looked at her like she was crazy. “Yeah and it only took me all morning.” Grandma waved up her hands in defeat. “Well come on in the house and get washed up…I got to go to the grocery store anyway, we can pick up everything we need there.” I pulled my hair back and nodded. “Aight...” As I began to walk past my grandmother into the house she stopped me. “On second thought…” she said scrunching up her face at me and holding her nose. “I may have to get you some soap, a towel, and a water hose cause you can’t be funking my house up like this….boy you smell awful.” I pretended to be offended as I lifted my arm and smelled it. “What…I don’t smell anything grandma, what you talking about?” I smiled. She just shook her head and closed her eyes shut as if there were burning. “Boy go and take a shower immediately…” she said pointing to the house. “Hurry up and go… and use a bit of bleach too.” I threw my head back and laughed at her as I walked in the houses. Some things never change.

  “Alright, all natural weed killers right here...” I held up the bottle to my grandmother as we made our way down the gardening aisle. We came to the super center store pretty quickly after I got cleaned up. I was trying to show her some stuff she could use for her garden but like most women she got sidetracked by new sweaters out on the clothing rack and other decorative stuff she really didn’t need. I still couldn’t believe how her eyes lit up at the sight of the clearance rack…you would think it was Louis Vuitton. “Oooh… Derrick look at those shirts over there, this would look so cute on you…” She pointed to a burgundy buttoned up clearance shirt in the clothing department. “Uh…no.” I declined politely…or tried to. “Oh hush…” She said swatting my arm.

  “You’ll like it… I’m going to go find your size.” I shook my head as she ran off to the clothing department knowing damn well I was not wearing nothing off of no damn clearance rack. I may be broke…but I still had my dignity. “Grandma I thought we were here for things that pertained to your garden?” She continued to wave me off dead set on getting to that clearance rack. “I’ll just be a minute.” I sighed. “Lord we gone be here for the next two hours…”I mumbled. I walked up in down the aisle looking for more stuff that could be of some assistance, not paying attention to where I was going I ended up bumping into somebodies cart. “Whoa… damn…my bad I…” I stopped dead in my tracks when I saw who was behind me. “Hey…” was all I could manage to say to her. “Hello…” She said so politely. She was just as beautiful as I remembered; her hair was slicked up into a bun exposing her pretty face and a nice trail of beauty marks were on her neck. It was just until now that I noticed that her lovely eyes were grey which made her standout even more among any other woman I had ever met.

  She smiled slightly at me as she noticed I was staring at her. “I’m a little surprised you remember me.” She said modestly. I admired her lovely figure in a white long coat and tight black slacks…I never seen someone dress so elegantly, it was very different from the women I was used to…I guess they don’t make Baby Phat where she is from. I finally got my mind out of the gutter and spoke to her. “Well it is hard to forget somebody who saved your life.” She shook her head shyly. “It wasn’t that serious…I’m mean it was that serious but I…I wanted to help in anyway could.” She barely managed to get out. I chuckled at the nervousness she seemed to have in front of me. Damn boy, I thought. Even in a Wal-Mart garden aisle you still got it.

  “Well I’m glad you did…thank you.” I said not releasing my gaze off of her. She nodded. “No problem…nice to see your doing better.” She said looking me up and down pretending it was innocent…she wasn’t slick. “Oh yeah…” I said sticking my chest out. “Haven’t you heard? I’m made of steel.” “You sure look much better than you did at the hospital…”

  I noticed her smile kind of faded for a moment which reminded me of what happened at the hospital when she was there…damn. “Listen…about that whole incident at the hospital, I’m sorry if I scared you. I must have been out of my mind…” I tried to explain. She touched my arm to silence me and I felt a surge of heat attack my body. “No apologies, I totally understand…” When she noticed her hand was lingering on my arm longer than normal she snatched it away and backed up. I grinned at her slyly. So I’m not the only one feeling the vibe here huh? My eyes wondered her body again looking up and down her long beautiful legs, wondering how good they would feel wrapped around my waist while I had her up against the wall. She obviously could tell what I was thinking and I know it was making her squirm a little bit. Destiny placed her hand around her throat as if it were dry. “Um… well it was nice seeing you again.”

  She said unable to stand the heat from the sparks igniting between us any longer…to be honest i
t was getting a little hot for me as well. I gave her a sly charming smile. “You too Destiny…” She looked a little taken back. “You know my name?” I nodded. “You told me…” She looked away from me for a moment I could tell she was flattered.

  “I guess I will see you around.”

  “You definitely will.”

  I watched her as she walked away looking like a fine black stallion. “Oh…I definitely remember you?” I said damn near drooling. I felt somebody pinch my arm. “Ow…grandma what was that for?” She eyed me sternly knowing what I had been doing. “Well now that I got your attention…we can go.” I looked at her innocently. “Oh…I was just…” “I know what you were just…” She continued to scold me. I admitted defeat knowing I was caught. She shook her head in disappointment. “Derrick what have I told you about chasing every hefa you see with a big butt and smile.” “But grandma, it wasn’t like that…” I defended myself. “She was….” “I know who she was…” she said cutting me off. “She was another gold digging hooker looking to sink her teeth into your wallet….like just like the other four you got. Now there is enough on your plate already Derrick without you adding some hoochie or another baby to the mix.”

  I nodded my head knowing she was right and there was no point in arguing. “Now come on and let’s get in line.” I followed behind her like a little boy who was in trouble. I didn’t want to keep making the same mistakes I had been making all my life. I had put myself at risk time and time again doing the craziest shit trying to survive, trying to provide for myself, my kids, and my family. I remembered a time where I was the first one ready to hustle and take down any one dumb enough to get caught out there in my grasp. It used to be so satisfying and easy for me; steal from the stealers and rob the robbers. For some reason it didn’t seem as thrilling as it used to…but then again neither did being broke.